Name: Theo Von Tries Ketamine Therapy
Uploaded: 2021-05-08T23:23:25.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Theo Von Tries Ketamine Therapy' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-05-08. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Theo Von Tries Ketamine Therapy' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-05-08. Transcript available.

Recently, I decided to try ketamine therapy and, you know, I was a little
scared about
it.
I'm still a little bit scared.
I've gone to two services of it and some people are thinking, look, it's not
some guy in like
a, you know, in the back of a U-Haul doing it where, you know, you don't bring
glow sticks
to it and shit like that, even though that'd be great if I showed up with glow
sticks and
some little dust Muppet side piece, you know, some little girl named Biscuit
Door, you know,
and she's out there wearing baby jewelry and just smelling like dirt, talking
about electric
disco or whatever.
That'd be so great if the next time I go where I get a tongue piercing with one
of those, with
like one of those glow stick tongue rings in it.
But that's not it, man.
It's like, it's a therapy.
You go and they infuse ketamine into you.
There's a therapist in the room and you do therapy.
The first time you go, you just do therapy.
And then the subsequent times is six sessions.
You go and you, they infuse you with ketamine through antravenous and then you
just talk and
you talk about what's going on and it's supposed to take away your ego so you
can discuss things
that are bothering you behind your day-to-day brain.
And yeah, you know, so anyway, so that's where I'm at, man.
I'm trying it right now and I'm really excited.
I'm hopeful about it.
You know, it's kind of exhilarating.
It's kind of scary.
The place is real professional and they make you feel real comfortable that I've
been going.
What else?
I'm still meeting with my regular therapist.
I'm still going to my recovery meetings.
What else?
You know, I didn't have a lot of sober time on the table to, so, you know, some
people will say,
oh, well, that's, you're not sober anymore.
That's fine.
I'm not, at this point, I'm worried about just trying to feel, just trying new
ways to get better
and to feel better.
And, yeah, and so I'm just hopeful, man.
It was really kind of scary.
Like, the first session, man, we did and, man, I just started literally just
bawling, crying, you know.
Just tears running out of my face, like, I mean, just like they were trying to
get into America from another country.
I mean, just groups of them.
They had big tears, sneaking little tears.
I mean, there was a lot going on, you know.
And we started talking, we started talking about my dad, man.
I hadn't really thought about my dad that much.
You know, I don't have a ton of memories of my dad, really.
I was just getting old enough to be a human when he was losing his humanity,
you know, as he got older, on his way out, you know.
And so we were just like, you know, like dogs passing in the park, you know.
You know, a quick sniff of the ass, but we kept, you know, but we just had, you
know, you know, we never threw to Frisbee.
You know, we never, you know, we, you know, it was just, that's kind of what it
was.
And I'm not saying it like a Debbie Downer, I'm just kind of sharing one of the
things that we talked about in the therapy was just about, like I'd never
gotten to tell my dad how much I loved him.
You know, I never, I had all this love from my father that I never got to put
it anywhere.
And so we talked about that in the therapy.
And what else?
Just talking about some other things that have really been bugging me, man.
I've just felt really agitated easily.
I've felt a lot angrier than usual, man.
And I'm just interacting with people that I care about sometimes in an angry
way and it makes me not feel good.
You know, it's like being in a, it's almost like being in a mask.
You know, I've talked about it before about Halloween when you're in like a
scare mask.
You know, when you're in a, when you're wolfing or whatever and you wolfed out
with a headpiece with a mask on.
And you got that bad cat fucking, you got that bad cat death sock on your head,
baby, that, you know, that costume, that mask.
And, and sometimes when you're looking out of the mask, you can see out of the
mask.
You see normally, it's your eyes looking.
But the people that see you, if a child sees you, he gets scared.
You know, he'll drop his damn baby, Ruth's bruh, and go hug his stepdaddy or
whoever's with him.
You know, and so, anyway, so that's what it's like sometimes.
That's what it's felt like for me sometimes in the past year is just kind of
anger.
And I don't know what I'm angry about.
And I'm tired of not knowing.
And so, I'm just trying to get, I'm trying to figure it out.
And, and so, anyway, that's what's going on, man.
And, and I just noticed that I was, like, other people I noticed where I just,
I'm not interacting with people the same, the way that I want to be.
In, like, a loving way.
And I'm desperate for that.
You know, that's the part of life that I like to devour every day, really.
You know, and I felt like I was doing well with it for a while, and then it's
been tougher as of late.
And I know there's a lot of stuff in the world that's making people angry and
making people feel dilapidated in their spirit.
You know, there's a lot of, like, America that's been, you know, a lot of the
fabric of our society, I feel like, is being unwoven by the media and by, I don't
know.
Just people just want to dismantle a lot of tradition and a lot of, like,
things that make you feel like you're part of a society.
You know, everything is constantly challenged, and in society, it was always
what I felt like I was in.
You know, I felt like I was in this, you know, this calendar, this world.
You know, there's just certain little systems of the day and of the week and of
life that go on that make you feel like you're part of something.
And I think during the disease, I think during the disease, a lot of that stuff
is going, is kind of, you know, well, a lot of it's been impossible to spend
time over.
And as well, a lot of media has just attacked everything.
You know, every place you turn, they're attacking some piece of something that
meant that, that even if it was a business or a, or anything that it meant
something to you, it felt like.
And that's okay, because I know different things mean different things to
different people, but I think some of that, anyways, probably led to some of my
angst and some of my uncomfort.
And I'm sure a lot of people can relate to that and how to not be angry and
express my anger, where to express it and how to express it as a, as an adult,
because I'm an adult.
So anyway, I didn't mean to get all heavy with that kind of stuff, but I'm just
willing to try.
I'm healthy.
I'm willing to try things that are unique experiences.
And so that's what I'm trying right now with this ketamine therapy and ketamine
solution.
So one of my buddies, I told him, he's like, so damn, dude, you just been doing
drugs all day.
And I said, no, man, no, man.
You know, it's kind of exhausting, a little bit emotionally exhausting.
But I'm hopeful about it, man.
I'm hopeful that it, I don't know.
I'm just willing to try it.
I'm willing to try different things, baby.
You know, I'm like that Lewis and Clark.
I'm that emo Nemo, baby.
I'll fucking, I'll swim out in the deep, dog, to get a worm, baby boy.
So that's where I'm at.
I just wanted to let you guys know what was going on.
But I just haven't enjoyed some of the ways of my own behavior.
And sometimes I feel like I'm inside of myself looking out of the holes of, of
a shape that I don't even recognize sometimes.
And I'm not being extra hard on myself.
I know I am.
That's one of the things that we're also going to try and talk about in this
therapy is why I'm so hard on myself.
And, you know.
And just expectations, judgment, just all these things.
I'm just, you know.
I feel like sometimes I'm like I'm a, like I'm a Wi-Fi and I have these open
browsers spinning.
And I can't even see them anymore.
You know, and they're just different weird browsers that have been open for
decades in my head.
And one of them could be somebody selling a peanut butter or a banana.
You know, or somebody, one of them could be a damn advertisement for DraftKings.
You know what I'm saying?
You just don't even know.
One of them could be that cat playing the thing.
But you don't know they're open because you're trying to focus on a different
page and do life.
So, I don't know.
I'm just out there, man.
I'm out there.
That's where I'm at.
Oh, I want to update you on the ketamine therapy.
So, if people know or don't know, some of you know I got the ketamine therapy
going and I have two more treatments.
And, man, you know, and I've been going to my regular meetings and stuff like
that, my regular recovery stuff at the same time.
But, man, it's, I'd never done anything like this.
So, you're in there and they give you an IV and they put the drugs in and the
end of the thing and you have the therapist there.
And, at first, you're in the room.
And then, dude, it got, it got dicey, man.
I mean, I'm talking Las Vegas dicey.
I'm not talking damn Reno.
I'm talking Vegas dicey.
You know, I'm talking fucking out back of the Venetian, a couple brothers
gambling.
You know what I'm saying?
I'm saying it got dicey.
I'm talking about the waitstaff, the cookstaff out there gambling in the alley.
It's just like, it's almost like somebody takes part of you, your soul, I'll
say.
And, you ever been to a dry cleaners?
And, you go in there and you look and you see they got all the equipment.
And, you're like, oh, man, they got a lot of equipment in here.
And, they got the thing, when they press the button, it kind of like, and other
people's shirts go by.
And, you're like, damn, that guy's got nice shit, man.
And, sometimes you bet, if it's a smallest town, you'll see somebody's
something go by.
And, you're like, oh, man, I bet that's Miss Irma's, you know.
Oh, that looks like Randall's shit, you know.
It looked like Randall's little boots, you know.
Oh, damn, that's his stuff, too.
He's about to come out the closet, you know what I'm saying?
And, you start to get that vibe when things go by.
But, it's like somebody took your spirit and put it onto that and pressed the
maximum button they could and let that bitch go.
Like, I remember, at one point, yelling out that I was a cryptocurrency.
So, that's how you start to feel, man.
Things get, you go into the matrix.
You go into the, I mean, you're on the Mayflower, in the matrix, eating flour,
performing tricks.
You're doing, there's a lot, lot of levels going on, man.
It feels like Elon Musk just climbs straight in your ass and comes out of your
brain.
Like, it's a lot of, it's like this part.
And, I know this sounds crazy.
It's not like being high on weed.
It's not like being high on cocaine.
It's, it wasn't like the DMT.
It was a little bit like the DMT, but not visual.
It's like this.
I remember, at one point, all the furniture in the world moved across the globe
into,
into one little half bathroom on the edge of Zaire.
That's what I, I just remember that happened in a matter of a couple seconds.
It's like you're on a, and then at certain moments, it's like you're on a,
it's like you're in a wheelchair, but also,
you're like on a, what's it called?
Ross solar, roller coaster.
You're on a roller coaster, but you're also in a wheelchair at the same time.
Like, it's, I mean, you're, I don't know, man.
But, some interesting stuff happened.
I got to see myself as a child.
I got to, I got to, I got to just, you kind of,
I felt like I kind of had just, had to start growing up, if that makes any
sense.
I felt like it kind of made me realize some things that I just had to grow up a
little.
Shit, you know, I got to at least hit 10 emotionally, or 11.
So, so anyway, I think it's really interesting, though.
Like, I'm monitoring how I feel, if my mood feels better.
I'm hoping to be able to quit antidepressants with the help of a doctor.
And, so that's some of the things that I'm hopeful for in it.
But, I wanted to update you guys on it.
For me, it's a lot about just feeling okay.
Like, am I okay?
Am I okay?
So, that's the kind of, it's a lot of thing that I talk about when I'm in there
under the influence.
Because there's some moments where I'm like, is this really helpful,
or am I just doing drugs in a strip mall somewhere?
You know what I'm saying?
Like, am I just doing drugs by this damn five guys?
You know what I'm saying?
What's really going on here?
And, that's the crazy part.
The place I go, you're wall to wall with a damn five guys, dude.
And, four of those guys smell like fucking burgers, bro.
I'll tell you that.
I don't know who the fifth dude is, but four of those MFers smell like burgers,
bro.
So, it's hard, because you're getting, you know, they got you on the grill, you
know,
mentally on the spiritual grill in there.
And, at the same time, if you almost put your ear up, I swear to God,
I could hear somebody finishing off a double in there.
And, God, that really will, that'll make you want to get well right there
when there's a burger in the next room.
It's kind of crazy, the power of that.
Hope you enjoyed that video.
And, you can watch another.
And, you can watch this one.
You can watch this one.
Different options, different choices.
Some guy just brings you one option, not this guy.
Two options.
Watch one.
This one or this one.

Theo Von Tries Ketamine Therapy

Recently, I decided to try ketamine therapy and, you know, I was a little
scared about
it.
I'm still a little bit scared.
I've gone to two services of it and some people are thinking, look, it's not
some guy in like
a, you know, in the back of a U-Haul doing it where, you know, you don't bring
glow sticks
to it and shit like that, even though that'd be great if I showed up with glow
sticks and
some little dust Muppet side piece, you know, some little girl named Biscuit
Door, you know,
and she's out there wearing baby jewelry and just smelling like dirt, talking
about electric
disco or whatever.
That'd be so great if the next time I go where I get a tongue piercing with one
of those, with
like one of those glow stick tongue rings in it.
But that's not it, man.
It's like, it's a therapy.
You go and they infuse ketamine into you.
There's a therapist in the room and you do therapy.
The first time you go, you just do therapy.
And then the subsequent times is six sessions.
You go and you, they infuse you with ketamine through antravenous and then you
just talk and
you talk about what's going on and it's supposed to take away your ego so you
can discuss things
that are bothering you behind your day-to-day brain.
And yeah, you know, so anyway, so that's where I'm at, man.
I'm trying it right now and I'm really excited.
I'm hopeful about it.
You know, it's kind of exhilarating.
It's kind of scary.
The place is real professional and they make you feel real comfortable that I've
been going.
What else?
I'm still meeting with my regular therapist.
I'm still going to my recovery meetings.
What else?
You know, I didn't have a lot of sober time on the table to, so, you know, some
people will say,
oh, well, that's, you're not sober anymore.
That's fine.
I'm not, at this point, I'm worried about just trying to feel, just trying new
ways to get better
and to feel better.
And, yeah, and so I'm just hopeful, man.
It was really kind of scary.
Like, the first session, man, we did and, man, I just started literally just
bawling, crying, you know.
Just tears running out of my face, like, I mean, just like they were trying to
get into America from another country.
I mean, just groups of them.
They had big tears, sneaking little tears.
I mean, there was a lot going on, you know.
And we started talking, we started talking about my dad, man.
I hadn't really thought about my dad that much.
You know, I don't have a ton of memories of my dad, really.
I was just getting old enough to be a human when he was losing his humanity,
you know, as he got older, on his way out, you know.
And so we were just like, you know, like dogs passing in the park, you know.
You know, a quick sniff of the ass, but we kept, you know, but we just had, you
know, you know, we never threw to Frisbee.
You know, we never, you know, we, you know, it was just, that's kind of what it
was.
And I'm not saying it like a Debbie Downer, I'm just kind of sharing one of the
things that we talked about in the therapy was just about, like I'd never
gotten to tell my dad how much I loved him.
You know, I never, I had all this love from my father that I never got to put
it anywhere.
And so we talked about that in the therapy.
And what else?
Just talking about some other things that have really been bugging me, man.
I've just felt really agitated easily.
I've felt a lot angrier than usual, man.
And I'm just interacting with people that I care about sometimes in an angry
way and it makes me not feel good.
You know, it's like being in a, it's almost like being in a mask.
You know, I've talked about it before about Halloween when you're in like a
scare mask.
You know, when you're in a, when you're wolfing or whatever and you wolfed out
with a headpiece with a mask on.
And you got that bad cat fucking, you got that bad cat death sock on your head,
baby, that, you know, that costume, that mask.
And, and sometimes when you're looking out of the mask, you can see out of the
mask.
You see normally, it's your eyes looking.
But the people that see you, if a child sees you, he gets scared.
You know, he'll drop his damn baby, Ruth's bruh, and go hug his stepdaddy or
whoever's with him.
You know, and so, anyway, so that's what it's like sometimes.
That's what it's felt like for me sometimes in the past year is just kind of
anger.
And I don't know what I'm angry about.
And I'm tired of not knowing.
And so, I'm just trying to get, I'm trying to figure it out.
And, and so, anyway, that's what's going on, man.
And, and I just noticed that I was, like, other people I noticed where I just,
I'm not interacting with people the same, the way that I want to be.
In, like, a loving way.
And I'm desperate for that.
You know, that's the part of life that I like to devour every day, really.
You know, and I felt like I was doing well with it for a while, and then it's
been tougher as of late.
And I know there's a lot of stuff in the world that's making people angry and
making people feel dilapidated in their spirit.
You know, there's a lot of, like, America that's been, you know, a lot of the
fabric of our society, I feel like, is being unwoven by the media and by, I don't
know.
Just people just want to dismantle a lot of tradition and a lot of, like,
things that make you feel like you're part of a society.
You know, everything is constantly challenged, and in society, it was always
what I felt like I was in.
You know, I felt like I was in this, you know, this calendar, this world.
You know, there's just certain little systems of the day and of the week and of
life that go on that make you feel like you're part of something.
And I think during the disease, I think during the disease, a lot of that stuff
is going, is kind of, you know, well, a lot of it's been impossible to spend
time over.
And as well, a lot of media has just attacked everything.
You know, every place you turn, they're attacking some piece of something that
meant that, that even if it was a business or a, or anything that it meant
something to you, it felt like.
And that's okay, because I know different things mean different things to
different people, but I think some of that, anyways, probably led to some of my
angst and some of my uncomfort.
And I'm sure a lot of people can relate to that and how to not be angry and
express my anger, where to express it and how to express it as a, as an adult,
because I'm an adult.
So anyway, I didn't mean to get all heavy with that kind of stuff, but I'm just
willing to try.
I'm healthy.
I'm willing to try things that are unique experiences.
And so that's what I'm trying right now with this ketamine therapy and ketamine
solution.
So one of my buddies, I told him, he's like, so damn, dude, you just been doing
drugs all day.
And I said, no, man, no, man.
You know, it's kind of exhausting, a little bit emotionally exhausting.
But I'm hopeful about it, man.
I'm hopeful that it, I don't know.
I'm just willing to try it.
I'm willing to try different things, baby.
You know, I'm like that Lewis and Clark.
I'm that emo Nemo, baby.
I'll fucking, I'll swim out in the deep, dog, to get a worm, baby boy.
So that's where I'm at.
I just wanted to let you guys know what was going on.
But I just haven't enjoyed some of the ways of my own behavior.
And sometimes I feel like I'm inside of myself looking out of the holes of, of
a shape that I don't even recognize sometimes.
And I'm not being extra hard on myself.
I know I am.
That's one of the things that we're also going to try and talk about in this
therapy is why I'm so hard on myself.
And, you know.
And just expectations, judgment, just all these things.
I'm just, you know.
I feel like sometimes I'm like I'm a, like I'm a Wi-Fi and I have these open
browsers spinning.
And I can't even see them anymore.
You know, and they're just different weird browsers that have been open for
decades in my head.
And one of them could be somebody selling a peanut butter or a banana.
You know, or somebody, one of them could be a damn advertisement for DraftKings.
You know what I'm saying?
You just don't even know.
One of them could be that cat playing the thing.
But you don't know they're open because you're trying to focus on a different
page and do life.
So, I don't know.
I'm just out there, man.
I'm out there.
That's where I'm at.
Oh, I want to update you on the ketamine therapy.
So, if people know or don't know, some of you know I got the ketamine therapy
going and I have two more treatments.
And, man, you know, and I've been going to my regular meetings and stuff like
that, my regular recovery stuff at the same time.
But, man, it's, I'd never done anything like this.
So, you're in there and they give you an IV and they put the drugs in and the
end of the thing and you have the therapist there.
And, at first, you're in the room.
And then, dude, it got, it got dicey, man.
I mean, I'm talking Las Vegas dicey.
I'm not talking damn Reno.
I'm talking Vegas dicey.
You know, I'm talking fucking out back of the Venetian, a couple brothers
gambling.
You know what I'm saying?
I'm saying it got dicey.
I'm talking about the waitstaff, the cookstaff out there gambling in the alley.
It's just like, it's almost like somebody takes part of you, your soul, I'll
say.
And, you ever been to a dry cleaners?
And, you go in there and you look and you see they got all the equipment.
And, you're like, oh, man, they got a lot of equipment in here.
And, they got the thing, when they press the button, it kind of like, and other
people's shirts go by.
And, you're like, damn, that guy's got nice shit, man.
And, sometimes you bet, if it's a smallest town, you'll see somebody's
something go by.
And, you're like, oh, man, I bet that's Miss Irma's, you know.
Oh, that looks like Randall's shit, you know.
It looked like Randall's little boots, you know.
Oh, damn, that's his stuff, too.
He's about to come out the closet, you know what I'm saying?
And, you start to get that vibe when things go by.
But, it's like somebody took your spirit and put it onto that and pressed the
maximum button they could and let that bitch go.
Like, I remember, at one point, yelling out that I was a cryptocurrency.
So, that's how you start to feel, man.
Things get, you go into the matrix.
You go into the, I mean, you're on the Mayflower, in the matrix, eating flour,
performing tricks.
You're doing, there's a lot, lot of levels going on, man.
It feels like Elon Musk just climbs straight in your ass and comes out of your
brain.
Like, it's a lot of, it's like this part.
And, I know this sounds crazy.
It's not like being high on weed.
It's not like being high on cocaine.
It's, it wasn't like the DMT.
It was a little bit like the DMT, but not visual.
It's like this.
I remember, at one point, all the furniture in the world moved across the globe
into,
into one little half bathroom on the edge of Zaire.
That's what I, I just remember that happened in a matter of a couple seconds.
It's like you're on a, and then at certain moments, it's like you're on a,
it's like you're in a wheelchair, but also,
you're like on a, what's it called?
Ross solar, roller coaster.
You're on a roller coaster, but you're also in a wheelchair at the same time.
Like, it's, I mean, you're, I don't know, man.
But, some interesting stuff happened.
I got to see myself as a child.
I got to, I got to, I got to just, you kind of,
I felt like I kind of had just, had to start growing up, if that makes any
sense.
I felt like it kind of made me realize some things that I just had to grow up a
little.
Shit, you know, I got to at least hit 10 emotionally, or 11.
So, so anyway, I think it's really interesting, though.
Like, I'm monitoring how I feel, if my mood feels better.
I'm hoping to be able to quit antidepressants with the help of a doctor.
And, so that's some of the things that I'm hopeful for in it.
But, I wanted to update you guys on it.
For me, it's a lot about just feeling okay.
Like, am I okay?
Am I okay?
So, that's the kind of, it's a lot o