Name: Who Else Went to Vacation Bible School?
Uploaded: 2021-07-24T13:22:25.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Who Else Went to Vacation Bible School?' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-07-24. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Who Else Went to Vacation Bible School?' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-07-24. Transcript available.

Our church got VBS this week.
You got any good VBS stories?
I know y'all both grew up going to that VBS, Vacation Bible School.
Oh, I didn't hear that.
Do you talk about VBS?
I haven't talked about it much, man.
But you know what that stands for.
Vacation Bible School.
My dad would take us over there and we'd make a lot of arts and crafts.
It was arts and crafts every, dude.
The Lord is in the glue, dog.
Oh, man.
But that was just the...
There were chicks there, though.
Oh, 100%.
100%.
But they didn't...
Your family didn't know what to do with you during the summer.
No.
And they send you...
Anything.
Yarn camp.
Anything, dude.
Horse camp.
Yeah.
Explorer camp.
Yeah.
Boy Scouts.
Treasure hunter.
Nothing doesn't matter.
Yeah.
Take these kids.
Reformed pedophile meetings.
Something.
Yeah.
Anything.
I wonder how...
You know, if you're like...
Botany.
This guy looks like a...
Decent man.
Like a good Baptist guy.
If he's probably from the South.
So then you get a step away.
Yeah.
I could see him being at least a Pentecostal or one of those new churches.
You get a step...
So the Pentecostal, he's like a step...
You keep stepping away.
Yeah.
Then you get Jehovah's Witnesses.
Then you get into...
Like you get to...
Then it's the snake handling.
Then you're wearing an Iverson jersey after that.
Yeah.
Then there's snake handling.
Then you go...
So I wonder how far away from traditional Christianity were your parents that
desperate to send you
to camp that they would have said, hey...
Yeah.
Yeah.
Snake handling church.
Take the kids, dude.
It might not have been Christian as much as it was like, take these kids.
I know.
I'm dead serious, dude.
Yeah, dude.
Oh, you know.
Definitely.
Like, hey, what are you teaching them?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Who knows, man?
It's free?
Yeah.
You're taking these kids for free.
I don't care what you're teaching them, bro.
Because some of those southern churches...
It gets dicey, dude.
It gets quick, very quickly.
It gets real interesting, man.
And you're like, hey, get on.
Yeah, VBS growing up was...
I used to work at them in college.
Did you?
Yeah.
In college?
I went to one in New Orleans.
I worked in the inner city of New Orleans teaching at VBS.
Really?
Thank you.
And in New York City, I did one.
And, I mean, dude, it was...
There was no rules out there.
Because it's tricky because somebody else is...
When you work at a church and you're like a missionary, somebody else is...
When your boss is paying you but is not there, the human being was not set up
for that.
Oh, yeah.
That's true.
You're like, yo, I'm going to work in Nicaragua, but my boss is in Louisiana.
You want to set the alarm?
No, I don't.
No, I'm not setting the alarm tomorrow.
Dude, that's funny.
My dad's family was in Nicaragua doing missionary work when his parents...
All right, and where was the money coming from?
I don't know.
And there probably wasn't much money back then.
I think it was 1910.
Oh, yeah.
Now, here's a weird thing I did in relationships.
I painted a chair at Vacation Bible School camp and gave it to a girl like 17
years later
as an adult.
And you did?
Yeah, dude, look.
If you want to end a relationship and end up on at least a list in a woman's
head...
Some kind of list.
Give her a chair you painted as a child 16 years earlier as an adult.
And also drive it five hours to her, dude.
But again, in your mind, you were acting right.
This guy Randy, when I was in Vacation Bible School, he said he was from the
other church.
He would come over.
He was like a...
He had a red sports car.
And he was...
You know, when you were at that age, the guy's in his 30s, late 30s, 40s, and
he's single.
He's cool.
But now, you're like, why didn't this guy...
Now he's us.
Where was his family?
Right.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Looking back on it, when your youth pastor is 25 and hanging with us on Friday
nights, where...
Right.
Where are your...
Who's your squad?
Right.
Is it us?
And so this guy, Randy, would come.
He was a bigger guy.
He would always...
Big Randy, bro.
He would wear shirts in the pool to swim.
Oh, he would?
He would wear shirts.
Oh, yeah.
But like, not like darker, like darker...
Black guy?
Black...
No, white guy, but black shirt.
Oh, wow.
I mean, you could see through the...
You know what I'm saying?
Okay.
So he...
So he would do like...
He went off to high dive.
And that was...
This is a real story, dude.
Fake plant, but it'll...
I'm sure it'll take...
Oh, yeah.
Dang, boy.
But so when he...
And he loved doing that kind of trick.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
But he would always...
He wouldn't come out every day.
But when Randy started walking up, all of the kids knew he about to...
It's about to...
Here go, Randy.
And he would do a huge...
Come on, Randy.
Everybody went.
And he was like kind of a rogue.
He wasn't attached to a church.
Like, these are from First Baptist.
These are from First Pres.
Randy just...
We was at Sixth Baptist, I think.
Anyway, so he said he promised...
If every kid memorized Psalm 23, he would shave his head at the end.
Because he had like a long...
He had like a long...
He was a...
Oh, yeah, dude.
Yeah.
And he goes, I will shave my head.
He was an organ donor.
Yeah, 100%.
This kid, I think his name was Nathan and James.
Oh, yeah.
Two of my buddies.
If they could quote Psalm 23, he would shave his head.
Let's go.
And this kid got up there, nailed it.
And he got in front of church and shaved.
It was an outdoor...
Yeah.
It was like in a pavilion type situation.
Oh, yeah.
A lot of pavilions.
Yeah, a lot of pavilions.
Back in the day.
They were covered, but not at the sides.
Yeah.
Hope you enjoyed that video.
And you can watch another.
And you can watch this one.
You can watch this one.
Different options.
Different choices.
Some guy just brings you one option.
Not this guy.
Two options.
Watch one.
This one or this one.