Name: Magicians, Clowns, and Pedos
Uploaded: 2021-12-16T15:28:41.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Magicians, Clowns, and Pedos' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-12-16. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Magicians, Clowns, and Pedos' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-12-16. Transcript available.

there's a lot of performing characters you know like in the performance
industry
which one out of these two do you think houses more pediophiles clowns or magicians
because
hear me out man those clowns they're coming to your kid's party folding
balloons and shit
looking at stuff you know you don't know what he's doing but that magician yeah
yeah and thank
you for sorry to cut you off man but i but i got these buttons here and um it's
a good question
and it's an age-old question you know it's a question you you know you see old
men talking
this is something that's been talked about for a long time
well first of all let's look at clowns imagine putting lipstick on your mouth
sometime you see
a man you know your boy terry or whatever and he does a lipstick it's fine you
know he says he was
in a fire or whatever and that's why he gots to do it everybody knows terry
never been terry never
been in a fire you know terry terry never been in a fire terry bitch you never
been in a fire
so just be if you want a woman out a little or you want to you know you want a
small stick on them
lips if you want to do you do do what you want to do then do that but now
imagine a man
instead of just doing a lipstick he puts a lipstick on his whole face
that's a clown okay that's a clown guys and that's that's where it's alarming
you know uh when i was young i don't know if you could even legally be a clown
when i was young
you'd see him get pulled over all the time they pull a dude over
we had a guy by us he was i think people thought he just had allergies or
seasonal allergies and uh
and that he was kind of you know a little i don't want to say they used to call
it fat
but he was you know kind of gristled out you know i'm saying uh he was damn the
lord's love seat
you know what i'm saying boy he had a little lever on his hip you pull on it
his legs it go straight
you know what i'm saying he was that little comfort bear
and he uh he was clown he was clown and he would get pulled over and i remember
one time they pulled
him over and there was they just pulled him over for being clown
and the cops are trying to talk to him and nobody you know it's still kind of
vague uh what the crime
was and then he took his own clothes off and he had his he had more clothes
painted under his clothes
so he had and now he's naked now it's a crime
and then i think the one dude he tried to climb up an invisible ladder like a mime
or whatever
you know he's shape shit you know he's not shape-shifting but he's you know
wishing he was a
of you know which is basically the ninja of clowns a mime is just a damn ninja
clown
that's all that is bro a mime is just a clown that you know that got its
associates really so he's
trying to climb an invisible ladder and the cops beat him down um buddy what
was i talking about
but i think a a clown is just somebody i think that's afraid to ask you to
touch their wiener
that's all it is i think it's somebody that's afraid to say hey
daddy got that little spice entree you feel me
because some clown you see the wiener it's got paint on it that thing it's like
what's even going
on here you can't even everything's hiding so the craziest is a female clown
when you see a female clown that's when i what why what did you see was you at
a pizza party and
somebody molested you or something you know like what you know what i'm saying
like how did you
that's the weirdest one did somebody like touch your titty at a comic-con or
something how why are you a
clown madam why i'm not saying you can't be you can be but that's the one that
gets me female clown
gets me but magician magician magician is just
magician is the one you don't you know you don't even know you got touched by
him
you wake up and you shook in the head and you shook in the crotch
and you you you know you don't yeah and all you did the night before you
watched a couple card tricks
and now you molested like it's just a lot uh and i'm sorry i know some of this
can be triggering and
maybe i shouldn't answer this question especially on thanksgiving but um
and look a magician is really that's the silk sheets of satan baby because
remember silk sheets
they're on you but you don't you can't exactly feel them you ever get in your
grandmother's bed
grandparents have silk sheets because they freaks bro and if they if they're
not freaks anymore they
want to remember they want that freak textile on you know what i'm saying they
they want that spider spit
all over their body they want that silk so you a silk sheet in a silk sheet it
can be on your body and
you you can't it's there but you can't fully feel it it's like there but not
there
it's just it's like is this keeping me warm what is it and then next thing you
know bam
you're molested and that's a magician it's a silk sheet of of of satan really i
feel like so
if you had to have someone molest you would you rather a clown or a uh magician
riley mal
i would say clown oh yeah yeah why is that bub i mean just look at him
yeah i guess yeah i guess you you know you'd rather it's a more industrial look
i think
you know it's more in it's definitely more of like a it's more of it feels a
little more union
i feel like getting maybe molested by a clown you know
definitely a clown huh i don't know yeah well yeah you second guessing or
kind of you're just not sure huh yeah
yeah and look and look i'm sorry for even asking you to choose man it's um
you know it's thanksgiving i don't want you to get uh you know i want you to be
happy and and joyous and
free and i don't want anybody touching you that you don't want them to and no
matter who they are or
what their occupation is hope you enjoyed that video and you can watch another
and you can watch this
one you can watch this one different options different choices some guy just
brings you one
option not this guy two options watch one this one or this one