Name: Arby's Manager Arrested for Urinating in Milkshake Mix
Uploaded: 2022-05-18T02:51:05.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Arby's Manager Arrested for Urinating in Milkshake Mix' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-05-18. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Arby's Manager Arrested for Urinating in Milkshake Mix' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-05-18. Transcript available.

Fired Arby's manager admits to urinating at least twice in milkshake mix,
police say.
This took place in Vancouver, Washington.
Okay.
And look, we knew this was happening.
There's nobody who lays their head down at night on any decent pillow
and says honestly to themselves that Arby's employees are not urinating in the
beverages.
There's no, if you're honest with yourself, you laid it, laid it, close your
eyes right now
and ask yourself, are Arby's employees urinating in the beverages?
And your heart will tell you, yeah.
Because that's where we are.
And honestly, that's where we've always been.
And the crazy part is this kind of goes into that moment when an officer's like,
how many beers have you had?
And you always just say two.
Don't say you've had more than two, bro.
You've had more than two.
You know, you left your kid in the car one day while you were at CVS.
You've had more than two beers.
But that's what it is.
Like, hey, Mr. Arby's manager, sir.
How many times have you urinated in the, what was it?
Milkshake mix.
Oh, damn, boy.
Yes, sir.
How many times have you urinated in the milkshake mix, boy?
And, uh...
Oh, just two.
Two.
I've only had two, sir.
Yeah.
We know you have more, boy.
Look, I'd charge extra in half of these countries and shit.
They pay...
Rich people are drinking piss, man.
Don't...
If you bring them some piss from them in Guatemala or somewhere,
foreign piss, they'll sip it.
Dude, it's some of these high-dollar political functions that are over there.
Somebody's sommeliering off that frickin', uh...
That nut snifter, dog.
You know what I'm sayin'?
Off that penis wine, baby.
Piss.
Urine.
So, you know, rich people, they'll pay to drink that shit.
That's the craziest thing.
You go piss on a rich person, they get mad.
But you piss in a jar and put it on a fancy website and they'll buy it.
That's insane, isn't it?
But, yeah, only twice in the milk.
There's no way.
First of all, how frickin' good does it have to feel
to piss into a...
If that thing's mixing up in, like, a beautiful...
And you just dousing it up?
Dude, I remember throwing parties in college
and I would stand by the keg.
It was in the kitchen in the corner.
I'd stand there, a couple hundred people at the house
because we did it good.
At LSU, at the Commons, baby gang.
Gang, son, we threw that shit, dude.
We threw somebody...
I remember I saw this one chick, Belinda...
Somebody shot a potato gun, right?
And she was just looking for her keys, right about 70 yards away.
And that thing caught her right in the neck, boy.
Old top-neck Belinda, son.
Damn, baby.
She'd never been the same, bruh.
She always...
She frickin' can only look one way when she crosses the street now, bruh.
She frickin'...
That thing hooked her.
But anyway, I hope she's doing good.
And what were we talking about, Jeremy?
Do you remember it?
We were talking about RPs, maybe.
Oh, RBs.
I see what you're saying.
That's an RB.
That's a play on lettering.
And I love it.
Yeah, RBs, dog.
And look, I worked at a place...
Oh, yeah.
At my joint, at the party,
we would fill cold beers up in a cup.
And then every now and then,
we would do a cup of urine,
pass it off across the party.
People didn't know.
Those people are doing well now.
They have families.
That's God.
You know, and it's just...
Sometimes life gives you a lemonade.
Sometimes you get that little bit of...
That piss at the Arby's.
And you knew that.
You knew when you walked into Arby's,
there could be piss in something.
Now that, you definitely knew.
You knew when you walked into Arby's,
something I'm eating here
probably got a little bit of that...
That body liquor in it.
You know what I'm saying?
That freaking scrotum gin, baby.
You don't talk about piss.
And one more thing about Arby's is,
why don't we have...
They need to put birth control in the meat.
Why don't Arby's...
That needs to be the next thing.
That seemed like a perfect part
of the Biden administration's,
you know, insurance medical deal.
Let's get birth control
put into the meat at Arby's.
I mean, how many people
would vote for that?
Everybody.
Hope you enjoyed that video.
And you can watch another.
And you can watch this one.
You can watch this one.
Different options.
Different choices.
Some guy just brings you one option.
Not this guy.
Two options.
Watch one.
This one or this one.