Name: Riff Raff For President?
Uploaded: 2022-07-13T05:30:47.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Riff Raff For President?' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-07-13. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Riff Raff For President?' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-07-13. Transcript available.

a lot of rumors out there about you you've had a lot of stuff in your life
about music
art and i'm hearing that you might have a thing where you want to get into
politics and stuff like
that are you serious yeah i'm serious man i mean no but if i mean how much is
it how much is the
how much they pay you to be the president only thing only way i do is politics
is if you know
how people can go viral or a song can just magically go viral from 10 years ago
20 years ago if
somebody did a dale d'antone for president campaign and that shit actually went
and they're like well
he's over 35 well he's born in america well you know what we gave fucking uh
fucking weekend of
bernie's guy we gave him we gave fucking you know what i mean we gave carl from
home depot the fucking
president we like just to get the other guy out like shit fuck it let's go to
the rock rock's like
no i got movies to shoot fuck you go dan tony and everybody's like you know
what like let's just
get a fucking american fucking real actual man in there to fucking run the show
and and and listen
to the people and do all this shit i'd do it but it's not yeah it's not like
that but is it something
so you would do it if it came to you if it came knocking on your door you would
do it put it like
this it's it's like everybody asked me to like oh you should have podcasts you
should do all these
you know have a pocket i i don't feel like i i could set that up and organize
the only way i i would do
that is if like you were like oh you know what i'm gonna fully set up this riffraff
podcast and then
and then show me the the vision for coming from someone who's who's already
massively successful in
so it would have to be something from the world and they want it they want it
and they put it together
and fuck it i'll be i'll be president and now i'll actually try but me doing
the whole campaign and
actually trying to be president or trying to be i'm gonna be the fucking a
mayor you could start with
a mayor city council city council sounds like a lot of work a lot of suits a
lot of dry cleaners
a lot of luncheon can i bring my dogs i think these are questions that i'm like
i gotta even ask the
hoa what's some of the rules you do right when you get in there they put you in
there man are we
talking mayor or talking president i would say senate okay lieutenant or like
governor lieutenant
first of all i'm like all right where y'all got me staying at is it a guard gated
senate penthouse
so you want that upstairs spot i need them upstates yeah we're gonna like what
what are the part what
do you what like i need to know where i'm at where i could set up is there a
homeowner's association in
my home are y'all giving me a house or just giving me a whole bunch of shit to
do in a pile of papers
and be like oh you got to find your own trailer so you want housing not just
housing my bad big
just give me an arena okay all right all right guard gated and what you're
going to do though
you know moat it goes around the entire thing and one drawbridge goes down that's
what we're doing
first we're building a moat all right 10 feet because nobody's 10 feet tall alligators
and then what piranhas oh damn do alligators and piranhas even get along we don't
know
so imagine if you fell in that god i'm not doing that they're already been
practicing oh i ain't
being in there bro you know so when they have to try to get me out after them
four years or i don't
know what is it two and a half months if you're saying it i don't know what it
is they just shot that
one guy see like fame isn't even stint said oh you you put that smoke baby you
put my grandma in the
prison in 86 i'm like i just started being senate you didn't get my grandma you're
you're your great
grandfather put my grandfather in a headlock oh yeah you know now i'm dealing
with the previous
prior terms agreement you're dealing with old shit you used to steal steal
cinnamon your great
grandfather stole cinnamon from somebody i knew you stole the sit you stole
cinnamon toast crunch idea
your uncle rodney yeah he had had his fist so far up my ass he took my ideas he
took my identity
i'm having an identity crisis hope you enjoyed that video and you can watch
another and you can watch
this one you can watch this one different options different choices some guy
just brings you one option
not this guy two options watch one this one or this one