Name: America Can Still Be American
Uploaded: 2023-02-21T02:04:06.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'America Can Still Be American' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-02-21. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'America Can Still Be American' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-02-21. Transcript available.

I was thinking a lot about America.
It seems like a lot of people these days and a lot of like article writers and
stuff, they're
like, America needs diversity, America needs this.
And look, America is quickly becoming extremely more diverse than it was when I
was a kid.
And that will not change.
And that's great.
That's the direction America's headed, right?
I was talking to some friends of mine who are from China.
I'm like, is it weird sometimes that we, it's almost like we're trying to
change America.
It's like, oh, people are moving here from Guam.
Then we need to make America more like Guam so they feel comfortable.
But that's not the truth.
For me, it isn't.
For me, it feels like, and I'm happy to be wrong, that America wants to be this
thing.
You know, it wants to be this wild, fancy cat.
You know, a cat that also sometimes wears a raccoon fur coat.
You're like, dang, is that cat wearing coon?
Yes, it is.
You know, and so, and so people don't, they don't want you to, to kill the rack,
to kill
the cat in the raccoon coat.
They don't want you to change, you know, people, they don't want to come from
Guam and be like,
oh, good, this is just like Guam.
They want to be accepted.
But we don't have to make America a different place to fit everybody.
That's not a fucking country.
That's an airport.
You know, that's a gas station.
You know, we want to have something for everybody.
Well, we do want to have something for everybody.
And that's acceptance.
But I think we can also still have this thing that America is.
And yes, some of the things that America is are dumb.
Some of them are awesome.
But that's just like everywhere else, dude.
Bro, some, there's one country, China.
Somebody, my buddy's telling me, you can eat dick over there.
You could buy a couple of little sack of fucking dicks, dude.
What?
Now, are there big articles in China saying we got to, you know, people, you
know, no more
dicks.
People want salmon when they come here.
No.
Because it's China.
You go there to get, you know, when you're there, you want it to be what it is.
And it's like, I don't think we should sacrifice whatever America is, you know,
the good, like,
as if that's bad for us.
You know, as if like, oh, it's the same old apple pie and cheddar cheese and,
you know,
and people, you know, fucking and drinking Mountain Dew.
So what?
Then that's what it is, man.
Things will evolve.
But at the same time, like, you know, we can't turn America.
It's not Epcot Center.
I think it can still be America.
And people can come to America and they can be, oh, this is cool.
This is America.
I might not be originally American, but I live here.
So sometimes I feel like there's this unhappiness out there where people are
like, we have to
change.
Everything has to change.
Nah, man.
The only thing that slowly is changing over time and for some people it's
quicker is our
hearts and our ability to accept each other, you know, and sometimes that shit
takes a long
time, dude.
You know, it takes a long time.
Some places don't have a lot of diversity.
Doesn't make them a bad place, but it's going to be unique to them.
You can't force shit overnight.
It's like this, you know, it's like sign this paper that says you're not, you
know, you've
never had a racist thought.
Why can't it be crazy to sign that?
I don't think anybody's, I don't think anybody in the world could sign that.
You know, but just because you have thoughts or you have questions, it's like
we can't
just get caged up.
People forget this shit about America.
What we have has been heavily defended, heavily defended.
We've had a lot of wars in four or 500 years, 1492, I guess.
I don't know.
And is that even real?
Who knows?
You know, there's been a lot of lives have gone through this to uphold this
country.
People forget about all that, you know, and people are like, well, you know,
they took
the land from the Indians.
Yeah, well, they did, man.
What the fuck?
They were fighting over it.
Yeah, it was fucked up, but that's what happened.
A lot of shit fucked up.
A lot of fucking shit happened over the years.
The dinosaurs fucking, they broke a lot of ice and stuff, walking on ice.
Whose fault?
Are they climate haters?
Are they ice killers?
Who knows?
You know, it was a different time.
It was cutthroat, and they could get back to that.
Hope you enjoyed that video, and you can watch another.
And you can watch this one.
You can watch this one.
Different options, different choices.
Some guy just brings you one option, not this guy.
Two options.
Watch one.
This one or this one.