Name: Why Am I Always in Conflict With Myself?
Uploaded: 2024-05-28T14:30:31.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Why Am I Always in Conflict With Myself?' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-05-28. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Why Am I Always in Conflict With Myself?' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-05-28. Transcript available.

i got a call right here that came in um hey yo my name is wade i am what's up wade
man thank you for calling man i um excuse me i had uh you know when i was a kid
they had a
kid in my class named wade and he was a ginger and they didn't have they didn't
i don't even
allowed a lot of gingers in our area but he had gotten in and he was a neat guy
you know
he had a beautiful sister or she could have just been a sister it could have
just been his sister
and she was just i was at that age where if any if a dude had a sister it was
like she's beautiful
you know and i was the worst i remember i just got at that age i was the worst
at talking to women
i mean and i still am but at that time i had really my buddy would like if i
had a friend who
was like hey man you should go talk to that girl i would immediately not only
would i not walk over
and talk to the girl i would run 15 miles in the other direction
i would and then when i got there i would start writing letters to the girl
and telling her how i missed her and i wish things could be different and all
just crazy just i was just i've always been a bizarre
relationshipist in a way i'll be like dude that girl's looking at you should go
talk to her
i will fucking take one step towards her then 7 000 steps the other way and
then when i get over
there i start drawing paintings of her i'll take art classes all that kind of
shit but
yeah i always had trouble talking to women but um anyway uh but now it's not as
bad but it's still not
cool um but wade had a sister i don't remember her name i think she damn looked
like him i don't even
know bruh but it didn't matter it didn't even damn matter and wade was cool he
was interesting
uh pale too god so pale you could fucking see his heart trying
damn some days you'd be like damn you gotta
you better pluck that thing a couple times wade we're about to play basketball
you know you're gonna
need it um but anyway go on man i'm sorry i interrupted your call with my
bullshit let me
start your call over a little my name is wade i'm a college student and you're
a college student okay
onward uh i don't mean to like bring you down or anything but um you know you
were pretty real
about your mental health and stuff and i just you know i'm just calling to kind
of wonder if you
ever felt like you were like just always fighting yourself and you just don't
know why and you kind
just and you just but i just know i'm losing you know or you know you're losing
yeah if i was always
fighting myself and i didn't know why um but i was always losing um yeah let me
let's hear more
i just feel like i'm failing all the time and it's not that i don't talk about
it because i do talk
about it and people just tell me that you know i should go to the gym or i
should try harder in
school or i should do all this other stuff but i just fail all the time and i
don't know man i don't
feel good i know yeah thanks thank you thanks for the call man i appreciate it
um yeah i can relate
in in the way uh that i just appreciate you caring about yourself enough to
call and see what's going
on and just share it you know neither one of us probably has a has an answer
but we can share about
what's going on and then at least now both of us um you know if you're carrying
a burden by yourself if
you share it with somebody else now two people are carrying it you know and it's
lighter um
you know i was always in conflict with myself always if i was working i wasn't
work i should have been
having fun or i wasn't working hard enough if i was having fun like god i gotta
i gotta go to work
uh i never let myself win that's what i realized i never i never let myself win
so i was always in
conflict always i was never doing anything right and then i realized that i had
my perspective was off i
had i had made unrealistic expectations for myself and i made unrealistic
expectations for myself because
if i could never get things right then that means that i'm always wrong
and if i'm always wrong then that attaches to whatever my core belief about
myself one of my core
beliefs like something i think real deep down inside myself one of the things i
thought was that
i'm always wrong i can't do anything right i'm never enough right those were
core beliefs that i had for
me and so by having unrealistic expectations i set myself up always to fail
because i never could
achieve my own expectations they were always impossible so then once i fail
which is all the
time it attaches back to the old feeling of well i'm not enough right so then
it's like almost a
self-fulfilling prophecy in a way uh so i'm not saying that's what's going on
with you but
if you're never enough for yourself then you might want to look at get talk to
a therapist about some
of what your core beliefs are and how do you find out what those are because
that's where i've had to
just that's where i've had to start looking for myself um and then also i think
stay in action like
you know stay in action like keep you know stay moving whether it's that you
jog or you go for a
walk or if you'd like to go to the gym those things are important because
otherwise you get like your
body is sedentary and if it's sedentary you're you're gonna be even more like
glum and depressed
it's so much easier for depression to like grow on you if you're if you're uh
not a moving target
so staying in motion i think helps um not all the time don't sleep on like a
treadmill or anything
but just you know stay busy keep your blood going um
yeah i don't know if that's helpful helpful or not but then then it was like i
wasn't always in
conflict with myself because i would never let myself win that was the thing i
was never good
enough for myself and no one else was ever good enough for me you know i just
had unrealistic
expectations man um so i'm not feeling bad about it or anything i'm happy that
i'm able to see it
i haven't cured it for myself or anything like that but i at least have a look
at it now and i'm at least
now able to when i pray i'm able to ask god say hey god you know help me to see
my unrealistic
expectations help me to make those more bring those into the light for me so
that i can see where they
show up you know um yeah that's all i got really on that man and uh and give
yourself some grace too
just don't be so hard on yourself man i'm sure you're doing a lot but and don't
get caught in
self-pity that was that was something that happened to me for a long time i was
in self-pity i always
had a problem and if i always have a problem and everything is wrong and
everything then that's
self-pity because that's not the reality of things the reality of things is
that there's possibility
everywhere somehow but if i'm always playing the victim to myself and stuff and
in common when i'm
talking with people then it's like i'm i'm getting into self-pity and i'm not
judging you with that i'm
just saying just look out for it i i fell into it for a long time and fuck i
was a fucking shit had
the shit all over my fucking knees dude i was in self-pity so much bro damn
dummy but it's okay i
didn't know you know and i'm just grateful now that i have a little bit more
wherewithal when i see it
you know
Thank you.