Name: Bloomington Marriage Proposal- Highway 37
Uploaded: 2009-02-03T16:40:12.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bloomington Marriage Proposal- Highway 37' from Theo Von on Comedy Buff. Published 2009-02-03. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bloomington Marriage Proposal- Highway 37' from Theo Von on Comedy Buff. Published 2009-02-03. Transcript available.

Are you ready for a comedy show tonight?
Please put your hands together for Kenneth Brown!
Give it going for Kenneth Brown and the picture for Mr. Jordan Brown!
Give it going, come on!
I'm glad everybody made it. Congratulations Kenneth, man, that is ballsy.
Wow, I can't even believe you said yes.
I spent five minutes with the guy back there and I wanted him out of my fucking
life.
Two minutes up here and you were in forever.
So congratulations and best of luck to you guys. That's awesome. That's
unbelievable.
I don't know if I'm going to be able to top that unless me and this guy get
hitched, right buddy?
Whatever, I'm a volunteer fireman as well, sir.
Okay, let's do this.
Let's beat this shit rock.
Let's climb up each other's ass ladders.
How about that?
How about that? We'll take turns wearing the hat.
And I'll even let you use my big hose every now and then.
Okay, but we'll use your hose for the smaller fires.
And to get cats out of trees.
Okay, we'll do that if we need to.
I'm glad I made it here. Barely made it.
I had to come up to 37.
Alright.
Barely made it here without being forced to pull over and buy a shed.
Why is everybody on fucking Highway 37 trying to sell a shed?
Don't you want a shed?
Don't you need a shed?
Don't you want to be inside while you're outside?
It's insane!
I don't need a fucking shed, 37.
I don't need a shitty shed.
Alright?
Quit selling me a shed everywhere.
I don't need that in my life.
And I don't need a golf car.
Okay?
That's not a real vehicle.
Somebody has a sign they're selling a whole parking lot full of golf cars.
Okay?
Not an obvious Asian person.
It's golf carts.
They're golf carts.
You'll sell more if you know what the fuck you're selling.
It's a little idea.
It's a little bitty idea.
Want to go see a hoops game?
I'm going to go tomorrow to see the Hoosiers, man.
I'm pretty excited about that.
Yeah.
I'm pretty excited, man.
But they suck this year.
That's what everybody's saying.
You know?
I know.
You guys invented the game and now you can't even fucking play it.
What is going on here?
That is crazy.
That is crazy, man.
Ugh.
Good to be here.
I actually, as I'm going up 37, coming in here.
I've never been here before.
But as I'm coming up 37 to come in, I saw an owl, man.
A beautiful owl.
And it's swooping like right off of the woods.
Like a wood line coming right up off the edge of the woods.
Right up going over the road.
And a tow truck hit it doing like 60 miles an hour.
A tow truck.
I swear to God, I got pictures.
I'll show them to you after the show.
Of the owl.
So I'm like, shit, you know.
Maybe this is a chance for me to get back in with God.
I'm like, I'm going to wheel around.
Let's see what I can do, you know?
And so I go back around.
And I get close to it and everything.
And I drive right up next to it.
And I realize, I don't even like animals.
You know?
So it's really awkward.
And it's like dying and stuff.
And I'm like, I don't know anything about things that are dying and everything.
And so I'm just kind of sitting in the car.
And I kind of roll down the window.
I'm like, are you alright?
And it's like nothing.
You know, not even like a talon or anything.
Not even a, like a, you know, nothing.
And so I knew it was dying.
So I had to do something fast.
So I just kind of whispered.
And I was like, how many licks does it take?
And he didn't say anything.
And I was like, text me.
And then I just pulled off.
And that was it.
That's a true story.
All that shit really happened.
And I really do have photos of that.
I'll show them to you as soon as we're done here.
As soon as we are done.