Name: How Many Chickens Are Eaten Each Day?
Uploaded: 2025-07-05T12:45:05.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'How Many Chickens Are Eaten Each Day?' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-07-05. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'How Many Chickens Are Eaten Each Day?' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-07-05. Transcript available.

it's so scary to also to think about i always do this too many times like to
think about truly how
many animals there are if all this food is being given to people it's so scary
like what are you
saying like how many like chickens are murdered not murdered but killed a day
like so many like
even i'm just trying to think about this reason like if i order uh an order of
wings at a bar
and there's 10 wings in there does that technically mean that i'm having five
chickens
like two wings a chicken i think there are some chickens that have more than
two
206 million a day globally probably 206 million chickens are killed for food
each day it's a
wild stuff what's that holy dude it's like since we started talking about this
140 000 chickens just
died oh that's wild that's the original gaza right there dude that's crazy i
can't believe they're
doing that in the united states alone the number's around 26 million chickens
that means that roughly
140 000 chickens are slaughtered every minute but hold on how many people live
in america i think
it's 350 million i think that sounds right it's it's around there i think so
you're saying
yeah 340 340 million 26 million chickens a day
so that means one out of i'm trying to do this math i'm not very good at math
it's like one out of
13 maybe 14 i don't know i think 340 divided by 26 is around oh you're right 14.
wow so one out of 13
people every day is having a chicken which seems kind of low i thought it
seemed right on time really
yeah because i think children don't need a lot of chicken because they're so
little and they can't
and you shouldn't give expensive food to children i had chicken today yeah i
had a chicken you already
had it yeah i had a i ordered a grilled chicken sandwich from um potbelly today
right before i
came i need something in the system you wonder what happened to me yesterday
that i'm actually really
disappointed about yeah and i hope that whoever did this sees this podcast and
come catch me outside
but yesterday i was out me and my parents did one of those party buses and then
a photo of a beautiful
picture we'll include the picture nice photo and then i went to one of these
party buses and then we all
went back to the hotel afterwards and i was pretty hungry i ordered some chick-fil-a
to be there when
i get there someone stole it no someone stole it i was actually pooping i was
in the bathroom it got
delivered at 4 23 pm i heard the guy guy knocking the door left it outside 4 36
i opened the door
vanished into the night somebody stole it i was furious i've never i've never
been one to like rad but i was
very close to going to the hotel and be like do you have cameras i need to see
who did this because i
i got more chicken and you know what i'm really i'm really hoping for like when
i order my chick-fil-a
i do it every time i travel i just get a bunch of grilled nuggets and spicy
fillets with no bread
i hope those bastards were drunk and thought it was sandwiches and tenders and
good and
they just open it to a huge pack of grilled nuggets i hope that them over i'm
so i it got
me so bad oh i hope those pieces of
shit fucking choke this is just a lot don't take what's not yours yeah that's
it yeah i hope they
fucking choke on that shit i hope they get a fucking waffle fry that never
leaves their system so now
i know i have a thief on my floor every time i've left my hotel room i know
someone is around oh yeah
i just want to start yelling banging a bell being like i know one of you did
this dude we there's we
have to be able to get footage of it what hotel was it yeah i could say because
i'll be gone it's
cambria downtown in nashville tennessee sixth floor i'm room 614. someone stole
my chick-fil-a and i'm
living about it and what could you have done what dude 13 minutes leaving chick-fil-a
at your doorstep
for 13 minutes is a long time on a monday afternoon though i thought it was a
monday afternoon i haven't
even seen anybody in the hallway yet and i think the guy sent me the photo it
was right outside the
room 614 it was right outside there and then vanished did it sound like he set
it down completely and
left it or could you hear any more like he might he might have been the guy to
come get it i hope he
wasn't the guy to do it because that would that would be bad that would be
tough for doordash i love
doordash but um oh yeah they're the fucking navy seals of our generation i love
doordash to roll i
mean tim dylan and i had a big conversation about this to roll up silently to a
door as quietly as you
can leave something completely fucking delectable right evade dogs evade
dangerous brothers probably
trying to rob you like all types of shit you know evade hungry people that's my
biggest pet peeve
about nice hotels like when you stay in a nice hotel the doordashers can't get
up to you because
of the key because of the key like this past weekend we were staying at a nice
hotel in vegas
they can't get up to you so you have to go down you have to go down pick up the
food but at a
decent hotel like a cambria they could walk right up there's no security oh
really they just let them
run right at my door i didn't have to go down to the lobby or anything and then
i run to the door and i
open it into my underwear and make sure no one's around grabbing it yeah that's
the best we try to
lean forward just hold the door open and just try to grab it off the ground
dude hotel rooms are
crazy how much you're just hiding from everybody it's such an interesting
experience to think about
i was talking about this with our producer kelsey recently too about just from
sunday conversations
we love kelsey just how much um like sex do you think has been in every hotel
room you've been in
like in vegas especially oh i can't even imagine how many people have even just
jerked off on the
floor in my room yeah if a hotel has been if a hotel has been over for 20 years
it's had like i wonder
how each how much each room has seen it's scary to think about because there's
no way it's being
properly sterile no way do you i don't know if you how you could properly
sterilize it unless you use
like eco shield or one of those companies that comes and does the um you know
uh i mean you'd have to use
some type of a high grade cleaner what would you even do pressure wash the
carpet or whatever truly
no idea that what do they always say no uh you should bring a black light into
a hotel because
you know what's on the walls yeah right yeah that's that's that's weird for me
and also my hotel is
right it's a very odd hotel it's the only hotel i gotta send you a picture of
it it's the only hotel
i've ever been in the bed is in the middle of the room like like it's not next
to any walls if that
makes sense that's a normal room but it's there's i'm telling you i'll send if
i'll send you a photo
it's just the bed is in the middle of the room i've never seen anything like oh
i get dizzy in there
i think then just trying to even just figure out how to get to the bathroom you
get caught in a
tailwind like last night my mom came in my into my room to get me to go out and
it was yeah that's it
they're just in the middle of the room there's a walkway behind it there's a
bar behind it
yeah that's too much i don't i like my bed in a corner i like to eliminate all
possibility of
things attacking me or whatever that's how i sleep in complete fear i do love a
good hotel view though
i'm a sucker for a good view i love a good view