Name: Are Cross Eyed People Becoming Less Common?
Uploaded: 2025-08-08T14:08:30.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Are Cross Eyed People Becoming Less Common?' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-08-08. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Are Cross Eyed People Becoming Less Common?' from Theo Von Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-08-08. Transcript available.

Dude, you know what I was thinking yesterday? Dude, they don't have any more,
there's not a lot of cross-eyed people anymore.
Yeah, you don't see it a lot. Maybe glasses are fixing it, but yeah, you don't
see it.
Were you part of like that cross-eyed realm or whatever?
No, no, I mean, I don't think I was ever cross-eyed. I might have been in the
realm.
Yeah.
Because I remember people with an eye, you know, there'd be, now I got some
land out in McMinnville and I went into a, I wondered, I thought it was a thrift
store.
It turned out to be a museum and the guy, the guy had a bad eye. You know, I
think he had a glass eye and he, I think he was excited I was in there.
Oh yeah.
Because he didn't have anybody to tell stories to. He talked to me for a long
time.
That's beautiful.
So they are still out there. They're just in, they're hidden away.
Because sometimes a cross-eyed guy looks like somebody that wants to yell a
racial slur, but just won't let it out.
Like if he did, it would just fix his fucking sight.
Yeah. I mean, then you don't know who he's looking at when he says it.
That's true. That's true, dude. So it could be aimed at anybody.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. That's beautiful. But yeah, you don't see it anymore. I just remember
when I was a kid, you would see more of that. Didn't you think you saw more of
that?
Yeah. I felt like there was like always like a, a slower class when I was in
high school where you would see them come through the hallway and you sometimes,
some of them, you were like, I don't know why they're in there.
And others, you could clearly see why they were in there.
Oh yeah.
I feel like there would be a guy with real thick glasses and you would not know
what he's looking at.
Yeah. Oh yeah. Just like he almost like he should have worked for a submarine,
but they discontinued him when they like made the technology or whatever.
Yeah. Yeah. Like, Oh, he should be the one on top of the sub holding his breath.
Oh dude, totally. Bro, the first wigger they ever had in our town, they put in
learning disabled, man. And I've talked about, I actually talked about that on
stage, but, um, and shout out Brian Purvis that has put some money on his books,
actually. He's, uh, he didn't do it. He might've done it, but he's in, he's in,
I think he's in jail now, but they'd never seen a white kid that wanted to be
black and they threw him in there.
Oh yeah. That's too bad. The guy just had some style and some flair about him.
Yeah. Yeah.
But he would just be in the hall, like doing like invisible crossovers on all
the other hand. So he was just like playing like just full court offense
against the rest of the, he probably liked that he was in there. He's like,
this is easy. I, this is a dream for me.
He probably did, man.
So far to get to the back of the bus.
Yeah. Yeah. True, dude. Yeah, man. I just, there was times I remember you see
that. Like I just remember there used to be more disabilities that were normal.
I felt like normalized.
Yeah. You know, like maybe they just didn't know where to put people. Right. So
they were just wandering around and.
This is a horrible to say, but if I were across that, I would just always
pretend like it had just happened. Like something just happened.
Oh yeah. Like, look at this eye guys.
Fuck. Just sneezed really hard. Do I look okay? That's what I would do.
Yeah. Yeah. You know, it's like, if you've got a zit or something, you go, oh
yeah, look at this thing.
You know, you would always, I would always point it out.
But God, my stepdad is patting me on the back real hard. Do I look all right?
Or something like that?
Or man, I just got bit by a dog. How do I look?
And people are like, God, you fucking, you know?
Yeah. You'd have to do something like that.
Sudden cross eye. This is, um, what can cause sudden crossed eyes? That's a
good question.
Sudden crossed eyes or strabismus in adults or older children can be caused by
serious neurological conditions and should be evaluated promptly by a
healthcare provider.
The most common causes include stroke, brain tumor, head injury, thyroid eye
disease. Interesting.
I think I'd go with this. Cranial nerve palsies.
That's what I tell people. Yeah.
Yeah. It's my cranial nerve.
Yeah. I hit a fucking speed bump and my fucking cranial nerves all acted up.
You know, that's what I would say.
Or you could always tell the old lie. Two of your friends both threw frisbees
to each other at the same time.
Oh yeah. Yeah. Or the uncorrected vision issues. Just go with that one. Yeah.
Just needed glasses and just wouldn't get them.
Yeah. Wouldn't get them. Yeah. My dad ain't no pussy as he says it. You know
what I'm saying?
Yeah. I didn't need to read those books.
Yeah. It's kind of weird because I would have to get two of the same book and
just hold them each right here.
Which is very expensive. It's like two monitors on a computer.
Yeah. Oh man. That's ridiculous, dude. Um,
yeah.
Thank you.