Name: Fan Mail Unboxing aka Anthrax Challenge
Uploaded: 2018-04-27T13:00:01.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Fan Mail Unboxing aka Anthrax Challenge' from Theo Von on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-04-27. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Fan Mail Unboxing aka Anthrax Challenge' from Theo Von on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-04-27. Transcript available.

Fan Mail Unboxing aka Anthrax Challenge

what's up guys I just want to do a fan mail and should we call it fan mail
friend mail I don't know about friend mail right cuz some stuff might not be
friendly right exactly hmm I mean that's what that's that's the catchy title
fan
mail that everyone that's what gets the views it is all right let's do a this
basically anthrax challenge because this could be you never know what somebody's
gonna send and that's the voice of Chris Perez in the background that you heard
right there he's in here producing today but and he's always in here producing
behind the scenes even though you don't see him you'll maybe start to get to
know him soon but we're gonna do some fan mail right now and you know I
consider
a lot of like the fans of this show like friends you know a lot of you guys I've
met you out on the road and you know I know it's kind of a short meeting
sometimes but I try to make it you know you know I know there's a lot of people
out there that come out because they care and I appreciate that and I try to
show
you in the brief amount of time that we have together that I care as well and
if
there's ever something that I do that you feel don't feel that way let me know
because if you should if you're showing up for me I feel like I can I'll try my
best to show up for you you know there's a lot of like messages that come in on
Instagram and stuff and I can't get back to all of them because I wouldn't
sleep
or be alive but I try and and I appreciate you guys's support as well so
let's check in and I want to I just want to I want to hit we got some gifts
that
came in some things I'm gonna start off I'll start off with one of those and
then
we'll get into an email that came in so this came in right here from mr. Nick
Reeves and
Nick was a guy who emailed and he said hey man I saw you open into some
stump doing an unboxing on the on the episode or the patreon and I couldn't
help
but notice that you're you know you're cutting into these boxes with a
toothbrush
or with a you know a bone you know a dead bird you sharpen a dead bird bone and
you
use that to get into somebody or something like in prison and so he said let me
send
you one of my blades and so this gentleman mr. Nick Reeves from Reeve from Reeve's
blades
and I haven't seen it by this thing already seems pretty wild but he sent this
blade right
here this hitter oh boy wow dude this thing this is a what oh my god I think it
has blood
on it you can't see this but there's a little bit of of uh some reality on
there
this looks like something that would show up with some luminol I don't know if
anybody watches dateline
or forensic files but a little luminol man Nick this is beautiful dude I mean
this is green right here
and this wood grain in here and they got some emblems in it this is really
beautiful man
and this is what we're gonna use in from now on Nick and this case feels kind
of homemade
um shit I'm gonna cut myself open this is not good for me I was uh I was
cutting into a piece of cake one time when I was young
and I was real hungry and cut my hand wide open and had to go to the hospital
but anyhow
thank you Nick we will use this brother if shit gets out of hand in here or
just to get into some of these other items that came today
mmm this case though that's the tough part but this is for Reeve's blades and
we'll put a link in your for your blades as well Nick in here below
thank you for that um I got this email that came in from Britain and a lot of
you guys know I've had a long outstanding issue with Britain
you know and it's just that you know and I know some great British guys man I
know you know I have some British friends through the AA program I got um
I have a musician friend that's British and he's uh maybe one of the nicest
people I've ever met
um I uh you know I there was a guy working sound on this pilot we're shooting
last week and he's British and I'm like jeepers
you know they're looking for me and uh and this email came in and I think this
might uh this might
you know this might even things out with the UK and me it said hey Theo this
was from John Mahoney
it said hey Theo I really considered calling your hotline but I think you've
had enough British accents on there lately
I didn't want to miss anything out
we're not so bad though when you get to know us and that is true
if you read the history books you see that Britain
stole all the diamonds
you know
killed half of Africa
and did some other wild stuff
but this was also when colonial times were still happening
so it was every man for himself
you know and that's kind of
you know times have kind of changed now it's not that way so much
but back in the day boy Britain was king
um he said anyway you must get tons of messages every single minute telling you
how funny you are
and so I'll say it and get it out of the way I love what you do dude
your podcast really makes my week go quicker
when I need it to
and not just because you're a comedy gift and how you want to improve on
yourself
it just comes through that you really care about your fellow man
and ladies
and that's true because I do think about them ladies sometimes
boy
had a daydream the other day about a titty
like the ultimate titty
and it was just one but it was
I mean it was god damn
it was just a fucking Dave
it was like a Dave and Buster's right in front of your face
which brings me to my proper reason for sending you this message
the last few months I've been struggling to keep things in line
mainly work and choices I'm having to make in my career
and it was really affecting my confidence and everything in my life
I just really didn't think I could keep everything on the rails
it was an episode a few weeks back where you said something in your closing
speech
and dude you just hit me with the exact thing I needed to hear
in that exact moment
I'm even going to pretend I didn't tear up a little
and you know it's funny man
I appreciate you sharing that
because that kind of stuff happens to me sometimes in here
you know a call will come in
and you'll just hear that
you know you'll hear somebody be real
and it's something we just don't see anymore
we don't hear it anymore
and you know I hear
I probably hear more of it than some people
because I go to AA meetings
and I'll go to those meetings
man when you're in those meetings dude
the thing that keeps me going
is that you have people in there
that are sharing like
the thing that they don't want you to know
but that they need you to know
because they just can't go on anymore
carrying it on their own shoulders
and you hear stories
I mean you just
things get really real in there
and it's a place where I'll be sitting in there
in half the meetings sometimes
in an AA meeting
I'll be like man fuck this people
fuck this dude
that guy cuts his own hair
you know what I'm saying
fuck everybody
this dude's over here eating ants
you know like a lot of freelance humans in there
and then one guy will say something
and it just
it goes through all me
me sitting there being judgmental
because judgment is just a way for me
to keep me away
you away from me
and me away from you
and somebody will hit me with something
and it'll just like an arrow
right into my heart man
but thanks for saying that
dude I'm glad we have some moments like that on here
and you said I'm probably a bit older than you
had totally different upbringings
to a lot of the guys that call into your show
but that doesn't mean my arts aren't as dark
as those guys
they just manifest in different ways
I like to push myself as hard as I can in my career
to be a better dad
husband
to be physically and mentally as strong as possible
and it really takes a toll
you know that's so true man
you know I'm trying to get myself into a better place right now
and uh
and it's hard
you know you'll watch
like I saw this video that popped up yesterday
of this guy Aubrey Marcus you know
and he like is this MMA guy
and you know he's friends with a lot of those guys
and he seems
when you look at him
he seems to have his life
his life seems awesome
you know
and it makes me think like man
you know uh
it makes me feel less than myself at first
you know
instead of me thinking
oh this guy can inspire me
my first thought is
man I'm not as good as this guy
you know I'll never be as good as this guy
but the truth is
I don't even know what that guy's life is really like
you know
and he probably has ups and downs
just like everybody
um
but if I can get away from that immediate
judging myself
then I can maybe learn something from him
uh
but I'm just letting you know man
yeah it's tough
it's tough to show up every moment
it's tough you know
and I learn it from you guys
you know
things you tell me
and you ladies and stuff
and I learn it from us
showing up here each week
dude we've showed up here together for each other
I don't even know how long
how long Chris
has this show been going on?
um
we're about to do the 90th episode today
about to do 90th episode man
that's a year and a half of episodes
I think
I'm just guessing
the first episode was
uh
December
2016
yeah
December 2016
December 19th actually
I think I remember that
December 19th yeah
so
yeah we're at
right at about six months
or right at about 18 months
but thank you for this email
um
so you just said
so I wanted to thank you for that man
I'm not the kind of guy
that sends fan mails or whatever
but it seems wrong
that in the instant
you were giving me something so invaluable
and I couldn't do anything to thank you
I know this isn't much
but clearly you want to help people in need
so just know that you're making a difference
uh
thanks man
I appreciate that dude
um
you know
I you know
I don't always feel like I'm a good person
um
you know
I feel like I struggle a lot
with trying to be an okay guy
um
but
man you got me tearing up bruh
but um
but I know I want to be
you know
and so it's like
how do I get there
you know
and I don't know how to sometimes
but
you sending me this email
helps me somehow
so whatever this is man
whatever this is
you know
if it's somebody
taking a moment out of their day
to let somebody else know
that they care
I guess is what this is
and somehow that resonates with me
you know
somehow you just made me feel bruh
I don't even know how you did it
but the clues are that you
you shared your feelings
you know
you shared something
even maybe if you didn't even want to
um
and so maybe I
you know
and it's so funny
I was thinking this week
I was like
I want to get back to more of this
in the show
because sometimes I come in now
and I'm worried
that I want
you know
I want the show to be good
or I want it to be
I want to make sure
we cover some news tire
I want to
but really I just want to come in
and I want to try and connect
and so I think
this is exactly
what I needed man
so thank you very much
John Mahoney
um
and your last point
you said
it brings me to my last point
I don't think you're the kind of guy
that will stop that often
and pat yourself on the back
so I'll do it for you
I'm proud of you
you're killing the game
I've followed your career
for a few years now
um
and every time you feature
on a bigger show
climbing up the hitter ladder
I get a spring in my step
and seeing you and Chris
graduate to that new studio
really warms my heart dude
it must be so much work
but we do it so well
man Chris is a lot of the work
behind the scenes
you don't see it
a lot of emails that come in
I save the emails
and I'll go through them
when I have some time
but a lot of the hotline and stuff
and you know
communicating with people
on a daily basis
he handles a lot of that
so uh
it's almost like
we're becoming like this body
a little bit
and it's like
you know
we got the heart
and the liver
and we got um
you know
we got the skeleton
which is a lot of you guys
and the muscle
that's holding us all
holding it all together
um
but we're all working together
is what it feels like
but um
you said
sign off now man
but just keep doing
what you're doing
and I think
you know
I needed 