Name: Being Young and Uncertain | This Past Weekend Highlight
Uploaded: 2018-05-10T02:25:36.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Being Young and Uncertain | This Past Weekend Highlight' from Theo Von on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-05-10. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Being Young and Uncertain | This Past Weekend Highlight' from Theo Von on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-05-10. Transcript available.

How are you, Phil? You had a couple of calls from Scotland in the last episode.
Wow, we got another Scotsman here, and this is crazy. We're turning into a real
international thing.
You know, we got somebody out there in East Texas. You know, we got somebody
teaching ball in Atlanta.
We got beautiful Laura out there planting them petunias, planting those smoke-free
petunias.
And I didn't even tell you congratulations, Laura, because, dude, I'll tell you
this.
I've quit cocaine, man, trying not to ever smoke, because most of the day I'll
be fine.
But it hits about 9.30 p.m. I'm at the comedy club, and that's when it gets
tough.
And now we got some people calling from other countries. Let's hear more,
brother. Thank you for calling.
Sorry, it inspired me to just phone you.
I was going to ask, I'm about to sort of graduate, as you thought, and I'm not
really sure what to do afterwards.
And so I thought I'd ask, when you were, you know, in your early 20s or
whatever, what did you want to do?
Because I'm always sort of jealous of people who have, like, you have your
comedy and different people do different things.
And it's one thing to actually achieve a dream, but even just to have one, it
seems like it would be, it would take a lot of stress, a lot of things.
And I don't really have a dream. I don't know what I would do.
Man, there's something about when somebody calls from another country, and he's
like, I don't really have a dream.
I'm not taking the piss out of you there. I appreciate you calling, man.
You know, you know, I can understand what you're saying.
You know, it's tough, and you're young, though. You're a young guy, and so you
have a lot of time.
And one of the cool things about being young is that you don't have to have
that yet.
You know, maybe some of the thing could be that in your head, you got this idea
that you have to have that.
And if you don't have, oh, I'm going to be a lawyer, or I'm going to be this,
or I'm going to be that,
that makes you feel like, oh, no direction.
But man, you know, I love being a comedian these days, but if I could take a
year and go maybe to a law school,
I think I would love that.
You know, I would love to have that, you know, or start a coffee shop somewhere
and be a barista,
and just, excuse me, meet people all day.
Man, I think I would just love that.
If I could maybe go, you know, to school for therapy and learn how to,
you know, listen to people, I think I would love that.
So, you know, I think you got to embrace this time where you don't know.
That's awesome, man.
You don't know.
Anything can happen.
Possibility.
You still have possibility.
And here's how you find out.
You got to try.
Dude, seven years ago, or actually probably about nine, maybe nine years ago
now,
I moved back to Louisiana, and I got a real estate license,
and I did real estate for like six months.
And I worked with a buddy of mine whose house I used to live at, my friend Bo,
growing up.
I used to live over at his house for a bit.
He and his brother had a real estate thing, and I got into that for a bit.
And it was fun, you know?
But this won out.
Comedy won out over time.
You know, at the same time, I was bartending.
I was, you know, tending bar or basically a Mexican restaurant that also sold
liquor.
And I broke a fucking margarita machine over there, dude.
First day at work, broke like a $700 margarita machine.
Damn.
And that's also like, fuck, man, I can't.
But I worked there for a lot.
You know, I worked for six months.
And maybe even a year I stayed there.
And it was, you know, it was what it was.
It was good.
It was joy.
You know, I made the most of it.
And so you got to try things, man.
That's how you'll know.
You got to try things.
But don't feel bad about yourself because you don't know.
You don't, you don't, maybe you don't not know.
You haven't decided yet.
Try and reframe it, man.
You know, because you sound like a nice person.
And even by calling in, I can tell you this about yourself.
You're a person that cares about yourself.
Because you're putting it out there.
You care about yourself.
So what does that mean?
You're very caring.
So if you want a little clue, what do, what, what kind of jobs could caring
people do?
Well, people that care make good nurses, you know.
And I don't know if, I mean, in nurse, in America, nursing can be male or
female.
I don't know what it, what it is in Scotland.
You know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you can work with Laura in
Philadelphia.
But you, you have the ability, you still have anything.
And you don't know what that's like, man.
There's a lot of us even sitting here doing, you know, I know I got to go to
the comedy store all week at the comedy clubs.
And I'm grateful for it because it's what I like to do.
But it's still my work.
You know, I'd love to have a, man, I would love to go back to school sometime
and learn like a new trade.
You know, I thought the other day I would like to look, I'd like to go look for
gold.
They got this man in Arizona or New Mexico who buried $2 million worth of gold
out there.
And I'd like to go look for that.
But I don't have, you know, I don't have that time, I don't have that luxury.
So you have the luxury of freedom.
And you have the luxury of possibility.
So I think you're going to do really great things.
Maybe try one.
So what if you're wrong?
You have time.
So what if you take six months and take a class and you decide, oh, that's not
what I want to be.
I don't want to be a town planner.
I don't want to be a, you know, I don't want to run a bar.
Good.
Now you know two things you don't want to do.
So now that indecisive world is a little bit, there's less options to choose
from.
You know, I fucking, in college, I didn't know what was going on.
I kept jumping around to different colleges because I wanted to travel.
And you asked me what I wanted to do.
I wanted to travel.
So I went to, I ended up at seven different universities and I traveled.
And I, you know, and it was fun.
And, you know, I had like 300 fucking credit hours and no diploma.
You know, I took some of the same classes four or five times because I didn't
know that that wasn't, you couldn't do it.
I didn't fail them.
I would just, any class I did good in, I would just take it again at the next
school.
So then I got to the counselor finally.
He's like, well, dude, you, you know, you got, you know, 60 hours of speech and
reasoning level 101.
And I'm like, fuck yeah.
And he's like, fuck no.
So look, man, I think you got a world ahead of you.
And, um, and you, you know, get out there and give us, take some chances, man.
You got time.