Name: Kyle Dunnigan | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #388
Uploaded: 2022-04-12T08:00:06.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Kyle Dunnigan | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #388' from Theo Von on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-04-12. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Kyle Dunnigan | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #388' from Theo Von on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-04-12. Transcript available.

Kyle Dunnigan | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #388

i want to thank everybody for being a part of my life and i want to let you
know that i have some
uh new tour dates um i am going to be uh los angeles may 7th we added a show
there at the
wiltern albuquerque may 18th midland texas may 19th lubbock may 20 dallas texas
may 21 that one's
almost sold out savannah june 2nd augusta georgia montgomery alabama columbus
georgia june 3rd 4th
and 5th i appreciate all you guys love and support um tickets are on sale now
at theovon.com
that's theovon.com tour and um yeah i'm just grateful for you guys thank you so
much
today's guest is returning uh for the second time um and he's really he's a one-of-a-kind
impersonator and comedian and creator and he is a real unique man i would say
that if they had a
hundred men somewhere he'd be the only one like him uh we're happy to have him
back and uh he has his
own show on youtube called the kyle dunnigan show ladies and gentlemen today's
guest mr kyle dunnigan
do you remember my fight idea we haven't done yet what was it were we gonna
fight no who would win
win i'm fast i would win you're stronger but i'm i'm faster for sure i'm also i
can get down low and
come up huge like i get low and like what do you mean like one of those like
like uh like one of those
lizards that like does that big trick yeah i have a very long torso and i can
just suddenly you'll be
like how do you get way down there and i'll pop up huge i would be surprised i
i
there's two parts of me that wants you know one that wants to
figure it out a little when we hugged a little while ago i felt like i would
win in a fight
what did you just feel soft muscles on my back or something i mean i don't know
if
soft muscles is a real thing bro is that yeah like wagyu beef oh yeah yeah yeah
i felt that way
like a lagu cow yeah i definitely felt a sort of uh definitely something that
had been caged you know
yes yes well you're wrong okay um i'm very dense actually really as a yeah just
genetically a dense
muscle structure have you had your marrow tested or not yeah dense mary have
you have you had your marrow
tested yeah man oh that's miserable huh why'd you have it tested um i think i
was having some chronic
type of thing and so they tested it but that kind of stuff's miserable yeah i
have this thing called
i'm a liar i never had it tested do you ever get punched in the face yeah can
you take a punch or do
you sort of get your bell rung your your loss it hurts but it also depends on
how i am if i'm ready
for it um i think i can kind of do okay i have no idea like i might have a iron
chin or just paper
i have no idea and there's only one way to find out yeah no you never know
until you get punched what's
that i'm sorry yes should i get your partner somebody knows our idea was we
were going to match up
celebs be celebs and do our own you know pay-per-view kind of thing well you
saw that aaron
carter's fought uh lamar odom i didn't see that did that already happen or it's
going to happen it
already happened let's bring up a clip of that if we can let's go to the clips
um but there's just big
money in this and then me and you we commentate on it whatever we bring our
expertise to the table
i like it who would be a good match that's what we're talking about because we
have comedians like you
know they have little fights kind of like rappers or whatever you just go you
sort of preamble with
the fight and then you sort of announce they're going to actually physically
fight yeah and you can
just keep it on mute let's see if we're good at being commentators as we do
this there comes lamar
odom into the ring now he's and oh and there's aaron carter look at him he's
kind of bouncing oh there's
a height difference it's intense this reach is just not fair well you see carter
there is nipple high
on that brother he actually is fighting a man who's in the hospital uh didn't
he have a concut he went
into some kind of coma right both these guys have overdosed this come on this
is not fair
and there's uh oh and they hug at the end that's like when you hug me he feels
this soft man so
obviously they must have showed the highlight there are there any highlights
from that bout
that seems like an awful fight if that was the highlight real lamar got the nod
there
um who would be a good match i think maybe what about machine gun kelly versus
kelly slater
oh that'd be cool to just match names yeah like that or versus megan kelly oh
yeah and i think megan
kelly might win they both have the same body yeah i did her show last week
which i never thought i
would do her show but when i when someone just asked me i always just say yes
that's my policy oh wow um
and then she did this thing very nice but when people try to improvise you know
it's it's not easy
she doesn't like it or what happened no she they did do this thing which is of
course this is what
she would do but she's she'd be like what is uh jeff goldblum think of the war
in ukraine so you
have to sit there and on just on the fly write a jeff goldblum monologue about
the ukraine that's
funny i mean it's like an impossible you're supposed to give something they
call it yes ending when
you improv oh yeah yeah like hey i saw you at the burger place you uh had that
giant cat with you
yeah like i've given you something yes and he the cat has malaria yeah you've
added yes and yeah yeah
but you don't you don't ask an open-ended question how do i know this the
groundlings yeah i went to
two classes place sucks i went to two classes there and the teacher was a
native american woman i remember
karen yeah i had karen yamamamu yeah yeah pretty cool man they're nice but that
place because who's
more from the earth than the or actual groundlings than native americans and
the name ground you think
that's all tied together i wouldn't be shocked i mean it it i wasn't shocked
when i got there and
it's like this is the groundlings and your teacher's native america i was like
it for me it made perfect
sense i thought but it was my first experience i feel like right when you get
into hollywood everybody
goes to the ground yeah it seems like that's your way onto snl or something but
then you get there
and then they don't even pay these shows are sold out every night they're sold
out they don't even
give you gas money yeah give me five dollars sit to this sold out theater yeah
that's really i don't
know why they don't revolt there they could tell a judaic at a certain point it
really gets a little like uh
yeah they just take yeah there's not a lot of taking no giving give a little
bit of gas money
i think what um i was gonna open a place next door called like i wanted to
become a multi-billionaire
and just open the skylings next door and pay everybody like a hundred thousand
dollars a week
and just take all their talent yeah like what now dude and if if the skylings
if people airlifted into it
and people came uh there was no parking you just landed on the roof you had to
get everyone gets a
helicopter to give me expensive comment well i'm a billionaire dude what
happened to covid bro
well it's in china now last i heard it what it's in china now but how can a
disease that is
everybody has it or can get it just be only at certain spots that's what i don't
understand like
was malaria like picky choosy like that i i honestly have i'm the worst person
i have no information i
don't understand any of it i don't know i know this variance peeled off or
something i had it once
i don't know which one i had i think i had the delta thing or something wasn't
that wasn't that bad for
me but yeah it's just weird how it disappeared yeah and it's funny because in
the night what is it 19
i'm doing trump hands in like 1919 or whatever when they had the other one
terrific they had that one
took like two years it doesn't matter like how much you have in terms of
technology or what we've gained
knowledge we it still needs two years to get out of here yeah seems yeah it had
a great pr run who
whatever it is it had a great publicist the whole thing it felt kind of mashed
well but it does feel
i mean it feels like now that it's completely it feels way more like a lot more
of a facade than
it really was if it could just disappear right well i'm again don't listen to
me but i think what
happens is you know it mutates and it gets weaker as it seems to get weaker as
it mutates and so that's
what happened yeah i know a guy he was in my house and he died early on and i
it was like
right away like this is here and a guy and he was dead and so i i immediately
was terrified of it
oh wow you know when he was 50 years old he was an old guy and was he thick was
he smoking was he
doing dope no he was pretty straight narrow guy and he worked near like a smokestack
or anything
like was there any like live far away from smokestacks he wasn't didn't seem
sickly oh um
he he was he was in that band uh you know stacy's mom that guy adam schlesinger
yeah and he was in
my house like a couple of months before that and he was just dead all of a
sudden so i was wiping
down my tuna yeah um can of tuna we were at the grocery store just wiped it
down i was really paranoid
being you never gave you never feared it i mean i was just at first i didn't
understand it but then
once i had friends that people started dying i was like something's going on
here but i just felt like
the best course was probably just to let it run let it go i don't know if all
this it it just felt
always felt very bizarre to me and then how you how i could be in tennessee and
it's wide open and you come
here and you're like oh my god it's like a slave planet here and then the
numbers weren't that much
worse although i will say i guess when you're in a city it is going to spread
easier because you're
more packed there's yeah millions millions of people packed together so i guess
that makes kind of
sense it would be more in the cities but it didn't seem like it was um no place
was really spared really
yeah well it just didn't seem like how like how would they let me fly from one
place where people are
just i know it's still like that you go place like put a mask on you're like
all right and then you
sit down like you can take your mask off some airlines you gotta like like
lower your thing to
chew and then put it back up when you're done chewing and the other airlines
are like we don't
give a here at delta or whatever it is i kind of like that the up and down that
part i kind of like
a little bit you have a little more privacy on the plane and as long as you get
a snack you get
it's definitely makes you feel more like a like a somebody that's grazing
though you know you're
like oh if i get some food then i'll be fine you know see here's why i don't
like it and this is
like just self-centered stuff yeah i look war some people look better with a
mask on but but like this
is my month this is my money zone this is where i look really good oh yeah you
do have like kind of
like in a like a strong lips and everything else kind of falls apart but this
is where i bring it back
you know so i can be like a five or i don't know what number i am but no you're
not a five bro i
think it's nice to say i'm a five what you are way more you are better than a
five man i've seen fives
man and also most people are a five yeah i feel like i'm so you're better than
that i i appreciate
that but i think i'm probably pretty average looks wise it's hard to say i
think if you go for a good run
right you have maybe a couple you challenge yourself with some maybe even a
spicy food or
something or you know uh you know i see you eating a steak or something you're
an eight
just by eating just by the whatever um if you go for a good run you show up
sweaty you kind of like
yeah john kusacki sort of i'm funny you have pretty good clothes like you have
good shoes and stuff which
i think brings you up a little bit like i i gotta i i think my uh clothes game
brings me down if i maybe
wore nicer stuff that might help i think you seem like the guy in l