Name: Nate Bargatze & Mike Vecchione | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #437
Uploaded: 2023-03-28T15:00:30.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Nate Bargatze & Mike Vecchione | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #437' from Theo Von on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-03-28. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Nate Bargatze & Mike Vecchione | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #437' from Theo Von on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-03-28. Transcript available.

Nate Bargatze & Mike Vecchione | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #437

In light of the tragedy today in Nashville, I just want to say that my heart is
really just broken, as I think a lot of people's are.
This happened just right down the street from me, and it's just heavy, man.
It's a lot, and we just want to say that we are thinking of those people who
are suffering and praying for peace, and just praying that comfort finds them.
And I know people have different thoughts on prayers and stuff.
That's fine.
I'm not trying to solve the problem today.
I'm just trying to take some moments out of my own life to think of other
people, I guess.
But yeah, just wanted to say that that's on our minds and hearts over here, and
it's just a heavy, it has been a, it's been just a heavy time.
And it's a fresh, heavy thing, and that's what's going on.
And we're grateful to be alive today, and to be able to have a podcast and to
sit and talk with people that we care about, and that you are alive today to
listen.
So thank you, and we love you guys.
I want to let you know for touring that we will be adding dates eventually for
Australia and Europe, the UK, everywhere.
We're adding places as much as we can and trying to stay sane and well at the
same time.
So looking forward to getting over there, just had a great week in Houston and
Corpus Christi.
And yeah, just want to let you guys know that there are still a few tickets
available for Medford, Massachusetts, New York, New York, Las Vegas, Uncasville,
Connecticut, and Toronto, Ontario.
All those are available at Theovan.com slash T-O-U-R.
And if some of the tickets get outrageous, they won't be outrageously priced
through us, but if through resellers they get outrageously priced, then just
hold off.
We'll come back through.
So I don't want you guys spending a ton of money.
Thank you very much for the support.
Today's guests are two comedians who have countless years of comedy experience
between the two of them.
One of them, Mike Vecchione, has a new special, which is out now on YouTube,
and it's called The Attractives.
And it was produced by Nate Bargatze, and that's where you can watch it on Nate's
channel.
And they are both here today.
Nate is a household name at this point.
I'm grateful to sit down with both of them.
Today's guests are Mike Vecchione and Nate Bargatze.
How much water do you guys have each, uh, in the day?
I'm trying to have a lot more.
I'm trying to have a gallon.
That's one of the biggest things to do, is have water.
One of the best things you could ever do.
Yeah.
Is the most, it's, seeing how many people, how much people are dehydrated.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You don't even know it, but it's like, you should have that lemon water in the
morning.
First thing, you take a lemon, just put it in water and a Nutribullet and just
grind it up and then chug it.
Uh-uh.
It refreshes all your electrolytes first thing.
Are you serious?
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, wow.
How much a whole lemon in there?
Just a whole lemon.
Just cut it, peel it, and put it in with water and then just chug it.
So you take the peel off.
Yeah, yeah.
Hmm.
Yeah.
Yeah, people are dehydrated.
Science says we should have a ton of water.
Yeah.
People are very dehydrated.
You think they are?
I think so.
I think most, I think, I mean, the percentage has got to be 85%.
Are you hydrated or not?
Dehydrated.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
I don't know.
But it could be that high.
But it's one of those things, too, where it's like, you don't realize it, that
you're that dehydrated.
But it's also one of those things where it's like, you're not breathing right.
Yes.
It's one of those things, either.
It's like, you're not, you're just a shallow breather.
Right.
You know?
Yeah, maybe you're just like burning off all the water because you don't
breathe.
You're not getting like the right depth of air or something.
Yeah.
I mean, they're not related, but it's like one of those things you just take
for granted.
It's like, yeah, I'm getting enough water.
If I'm thirsty, I drink it.
That's how I'll know I'm dehydrated, you know?
Yeah.
It's the same thing.
It's like, yeah, there's no problem by breathing.
No, no, no.
You need to be doing these deep breaths all the time.
He does deep breathing.
Deep breathing.
You do?
Yeah, yeah.
He's a big habit.
I mean, he does.
We talk.
I feel like you would like talking to him about getting some, there's the
structure this guy
has.
That habitualness?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm trying to think of how much water that I have or how much I like having.
I think I like having it.
I think, yeah, science says that you are supposed to have like a pretty much, I
don't know if
a gallon, you think you have a gallon?
Oh, it's, it's, I forget the percentages of your body, but it's, yeah.
I think I want to go to the bathroom.
Okay.
Let me start.
I think we already started, Mike.
Did we start?
It's fine.
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
Go to the bathroom.
I didn't even realize where you're wrong.
No, I can't talk to somebody who I know has fully.
No, no, no, I'm good.
I'm not.
No.
I didn't know we actually started.
But it's not cool, I think, if somebody's full of piss.
Yeah, no, no, no, I'm not full.
I was just going to, I was like thinking it.
I didn't realize it.
But I would get it out.
Now we know.
Now we know.
What do you think he should do now?
I don't know.
I think I'm fine and waiting it out.
And if he has to go, then he has to go sit in the car till we're done.
We don't.
Like, you should have went before, Mike.
So you didn't.
I didn't realize.
So now you go wait in the car till we're done.
But I didn't realize we started.
Well, that's how you, every podcast.
We were doing the headphones back and forth thing.
Was that on it?
That might be.
Might have been a fun time.
I don't know.
Maybe it's a good time to gather some things.
Yeah.
Yeah, you got to listen to this guy, man.
You got to listen to this guy.
There's your 15 and a half cups, 3.7 liters.
So, like, you know, there's like a bottle, a liter bottle, a liter bottle from.
But I tried to, it would be to try to drink four liters a day.
Oh, my God.
That's what I mean.
It's so much that you're, it's just, you need so much water.
Yeah.
And these, I mean, I drank coffee, too.
But the coffee dehydrates you.
It sucks it all out.
I drink a ton of diet soda.
I love it.
But it's all dehydrating.
Oh, God.
And so everything's dehydrating.
Yeah.
And the water in New York is like, feels like it's heavily treated.
Oh, yeah.
I don't know.
Like the water here.
It's supposed to be like the best.
Don't they have it on top of the building?
They say it's the best, but I don't know.
It feels heavily treated.
That's what New York would say.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, yeah.
Our water's heavily treated.
You know what I mean?
We're the best.
My water's more educated than your water is.
Yeah.
That's the attitude.
That's the attitude of up there.
Dude, I had to work.
I got court ordered one time to work at this water treatment facility in
Louisiana, dude.
And they're not.
People are sleeping on the job.
Yeah.
Some of the stuff's getting through.
I mean.
You see like a float go through.
You see some trash.
You see some stuff that you know.
I remember seeing people laugh about the fact that somebody was going to try to
drink that.
You don't see.
I just picture you have like a paddle and you're supposed to grab that trash
and you just go,
that's too far.
And you let it go through.
And it's going out of someone's sink.
Someone's sink just flows and they're like, well, water's not going.
Yeah, you got a tire stuck on the other end of that.
That's what.
Yeah, man.
They had a lot of, I remember, in the last tank, like the stuff that's supposed
to go
out, like it's supposed to be pure or whatever.
I remember finding a bunch of barrettes in there and being like, oh, God.
Barrettes.
We're not doing our job.
Barrettes, like hair barrettes.
Our children or adults, I guess.
Yeah.
Why would people be throwing those away?
I read water meters.
Did you really?
So like depending on seeing how much water everybody uses.
No way.
And was it crazy?
Who was using the most?
Like, was it, like what ethnicity do you think was using the most water?
Women.
Yeah.
Women.
Yeah.
I would say.
I know it's March.
But.
Oh, is this women's month?
It's women's awareness.
Oh.
It is?
Yeah.
Who wasn't aware of these bitches, dude?
I'm fucking.
Yeah.
And, you know, they're all I think about or they're all that I'm dealing with.
You know?
It's like, who ain't aware of them?
Yeah.
My wife is better with water than I am.
Really?
I will leave it running.
Yeah.
I'm not good.
When I, you know, in LA is like a big, you're supposed to turn the water off
and blah, blah.
I was not the best at that.
And what do you mean?
Like, you'll just stay in the shower for a long time?
I could take long showers.
Yeah.
If I brush my teeth and I go pee, I can leave the water running and I'll go pee
and then come back.
And what's your mindset there?
It's just, it's like, why interrupt the flow of it?
I'm just going to have to turn it on and off?
Yeah.
Yeah.
You got to turn it on and off.
So it's like, you just leave it running.
Anything that can help.
Or do you consciously go, I hate the earth?
I do.
Anything that, anything in my head that thinks this is good for the environment,
I do the opposite.
Dude, I was like that.
I remember whenever they first come with like electric cars.
I remember driving down the road and just, I had a gas cell.
I was just pouring gas, driving a gas-powered car and pouring gas out of my
window.
Yeah.
Like, out of a gas tank, just like, fuck it.
We're not going to lose.
You're not going to lose.
I had.
And we lost.
And we lost.
We lost.
It was very expensive for you to go drive around.
Oh, yeah.
You had double fill up.
Oh, yeah.
We had, I had gas.
I delivered mattresses and appliances here in Nashville.
Growing up.
And, or when I was, you know, 18, 19, 20.
And so, we had a 26-foot box truck that we did.
And it got the gas tank, the fuel tank, because you put diesel in it, broke.
And we're driving down 24, the interstate here.
And we didn't realize it, but it was leaking fuel the whole way.
So, I mean, from one, from we get off, we fill it up, and it got punctured
somehow.
I forget how.
And then it leaks the whole way.
And then we get off.
And, I mean, there's just a trail of diesel.
And so, you'd have to go, when we were driving, you'd have to, especially to
another place, you'd have to go through weigh stations.
You know, they'd weigh your truck.
And then someone came up, and we, how we fixed it was just putting duct tape
and spray painted it black over it.
And so, this lady came, and, like, she was, like, a, you know, an official
officer that's, like, checking our truck.
And, I mean, it was, like.
DOT, Department of Transportation?
Yes.
Yes.
That sounds pretty thorough.
Yeah.
So, put black duct tape over it.
Oh, yeah.
Paint it.
Well, so, we're driving.
Very Italian, kind of.
So, me and my buddy are driving, and we're, he and Jamie, Jamie's driving.
And Jamie does not have a, I don't think he has a license.
And, like, he has a lot of criminal stuff.
So, he's driving.
So, we're, he's, like, oh, wait, you need to get in the driver's seat, because
we're about to have to go through this weigh station.
So, in the middle of the interstate, I have to stand up, and we switch places.
Now, I'm driving.
We pull in.
And then she's, like, I'm going to come check your truck.
And I'm, like, dude, she sees that we, our fuel tank is just, just duct tape.
Like, we're going to go, I don't know what, you might go to jail.
I don't know what's going to happen.
So, then I'm, like, out.
Like, I meet her halfway out, and I'm just trying to stand on, like, the step
to try to hide the duct tape.
And we hit it.
We hit it.
Yeah.
She didn't see it?
She didn't see it.
What a bad inspector.
Well.
You see that, that would probably be pretty obvious.
Yeah.
I don't think they expect anybody to be doing that.
I think they, I think that's, like, low, that's, like, really bush.
It's almost like that would have happened in