Name: Brianna Chickenfry | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #445
Uploaded: 2023-05-23T15:00:02.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Brianna Chickenfry | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #445' from Theo Von on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-05-23. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Brianna Chickenfry | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #445' from Theo Von on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-05-23. Transcript available.

Brianna Chickenfry | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #445

I've got some tour dates I would like to announce.
July 14th at Edmonton, Alberta, Canada.
We'll be in the Great Outdoors Comedy Festival.
July 20th at Guilford, New Hampshire.
August 18th at Windsor, Ontario at the Coliseum.
August 20th at Niagara Falls at the Falls View Casino.
And August 27th at Toronto, Ontario at Meridian Hall.
Toronto, my bad, Toronto.
Get all your tickets at Theovan.com slash T-O-U-R.
Make sure to go through there.
And if a place is sold out, don't buy the crazy priced ones.
We will come back through or hopefully we will also add some shows.
Thank you.
We've got some new merch items to tell you about the Be Good to Yourself crew
neck in teal.
It's frosty.
And we've got the new hoodie in Bittersweet.
Plus, we've got the Root Beer t-shirts from the Root Beer cartoon.
All that and more at TheovanStore.com.
Hey guys, I'm in the West Village of New York City today.
And I am at my friend, Keat.
She is an entrepreneur.
She has a beautiful coffee shop and flowery or floral shop called Rosecrans.
And she let us use this vintage carriage house today to record in.
So, very grateful to her.
If you want to support her or some of her businesses in the village in New York
City,
you can check her out at Ad Hoc Collective.
And we are very grateful for this beautiful space that we get to record in
today.
Today's guest is a podcaster and a personality at Barstool Sports.
And a personality just as a human.
And we're going to hopefully learn more about that today.
She's a member of the BFFs podcast with Josh Richards and Dave Portnoy.
She has her own podcast as well, Plan Bree Uncut.
Today's guest is Brianna Chicken Froth.
Shine that light on me
I'll sit and tell you my stories
Shine on me
And I will find a song
I've been singing
I'm going to stay
Welcome to the podcast.
Thank you.
Yo, Vaughn, you just let anybody on the pod now?
Is that what we're doing?
I guess we do, I guess.
You and I have never met.
No, we haven't.
Yeah, it's interesting, kind of.
I know.
Because I know you through Caleb, CP.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He's a good guy.
He's very mischievous, that guy, I feel like, sometimes.
You know, I feel like sometimes he's
You know, he's kind of a
He's a slippery guy, kind of, you know?
Up to no good, you think?
Well, he's just really sleek.
I think he's very smart.
Mm-hmm.
Some people are too smart for their own good.
We call him
We call him the king of the tards
Because he assembles
Like, he assembles a crazy crew
Yeah.
And then he's just the king and everybody worships him.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm part of it.
I'm one of the tards.
Oh, you're in, huh?
Yeah, I'm in.
You're retarded?
Yeah, a little bit.
Yeah, that's good.
Uh-huh, uh-huh.
Do we have, uh, I feel like I'm on one of those rides.
At Disney or Universal?
Yeah, that's where they put you in.
No, not Disney or Universal, like at a shitty fairground.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, we never met each other before.
No, never.
Yeah.
I went to your show, though.
Yeah, you went to the show the other night.
Did you have a good time?
Yeah, it was good.
It was really funny.
Oh, thanks.
Yeah, you're crazy.
It was long.
You're more animated than I thought you would be.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah, like you were doing all these moves and shit.
I was like, wait, what?
Yeah, I have, yeah.
I mean, yeah.
Got legs, yeah.
Well, I have, yeah, I have ligaments.
I have all of it.
I got, you know, or I'm gonna, I guess, yeah, people maybe think you would be
still or something.
Yeah, I don't know.
You were just more animated than I thought.
Yeah.
You were doing all these faces.
Really?
Like when you were laying on the chair.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
It's like, damn, he's animated.
Yeah, well, I think you have to keep people's attention, too, you know?
Yeah.
And you're just one thing, and you have to tell a story with just your body.
Like you only have so much, like, you know, you have to, I think, people's
attention spans, I think, seem short, so you want to keep them engaged.
Yeah, you were keeping me engaged.
Oh, good.
It was good, yeah.
I'm glad you guys have fun.
Have you been to a comedy show before?
Yeah, I love stand-up.
I love going to, I usually just go to, like, open mics, though.
So that was my first, like, real big show.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, it was good.
Oh, yeah, because, yeah, so I see you on TikTok, I see you on Instagram, I see,
like, and I just.
Yeah, how am I here?
Why am I here?
Because I just want, I feel like, here's why.
Okay.
So whenever Dave came on the show, he said, he's like, oh, we have a lot of
young, we make a lot of stars over at, those weren't his exact words.
But I was like, you guys, you have a good eye for talent.
Yeah.
We're talking about, oh, Dave, you got a good eye for talent.
And he's like, yeah, we have some great talent right now.
And he named a couple of people, but he named you.
And so I was like, oh, interesting.
So I just trust his eye for talent, you know?
You trust Dave?
Yeah, I think so.
You think so?
Well, yeah, he's found a lot of good people.
Yeah.
You had Glenny Balls on.
Yeah.
He found Glenny Balls.
Yeah.
Found Caleb.
Yeah.
Found me.
I don't know what I'm really doing.
They always say I'm doing so well, but I don't really see that.
Yeah.
I guess maybe that's what I wanted.
I was like, who is this gal?
And then like, yeah, what is her?
What does she do?
I know she's like, you know, I see you just on the internet.
So I know she's like an attractive girl.
I know that she, you know, likes to drink or do drugs or whatever, you know, or,
and you're
from Massachusetts, right?
I'm from Boston.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So you can probably drink through your vagina.
I mean, I don't know.
Some girls there can really.
They can do it.
Yeah.
They'll find, they'll get a beer down or they'll get a beer up.
Yeah.
It's kind of crazy.
I can get it up.
I can get it up.
But no, everyone thinks I do a bunch of drugs.
I went, I did the NELC podcast the other day.
Okay.
And they sit me down.
They're just like, how much drugs do you do?
How much cocaine do you do?
I don't do drugs.
Oh, really?
I do.
Well, I do shrooms.
I guess I don't do the hard drugs.
Okay.
Yeah.
I think I'm like a big, everyone thinks I'm a big coke head because my thing is
sleep
when you're dead.
So that's fair.
Yeah.
That's a cocaine slogan.
I know, but it's not, I don't do cocaine.
I got a lot of more people in my family do drugs than don't do drugs.
Okay.
Yeah.
I believe that.
Yeah.
So I got a crazy family.
Really?
And so now when you say that, um, that you don't do drugs or you onto the, you
have any
drugs in your system right now, you think?
Adderall.
Okay.
Yeah.
How much you think if you had to guess?
Vyvanse, 60 milligrams.
That seems like a lot.
It is kind of a lot.
It is?
I haven't taken it in a while, but I have a long day.
So I might have a heart attack or like shit myself a little bit.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Sometimes the Vyvanse is hard.
I can't really turn my neck when I'm on it.
That shit gets me real tight.
I start biting my cheeks and stuff.
I guess it's kind of worse than cocaine.
I opened it up because I was like, maybe I'll just take half and it's just
cocaine in there.
Oh, it is?
Yeah.
It's all white powder.
It's crazy.
It's kind of scary.
Yeah.
Anytime like you're, yeah.
Anytime you get something from like a CVS, but it's a powder, it's like, it's
kind of
a dicey.
It's kind of scary.
Yeah.
So I poured a little, I poured half in and it's just chemicals.
Yeah.
Oh yeah.
It's fucking kind of good though.
Yeah.
It wasn't bad.
Yeah.
Oh dude.
I remember I found the pill on the gym mat one time and I just slurped it up.
What was it?
I don't know.
Well, how'd you feel?
Could have been, could have been for like erectile dysfunction.
Could have been a dexatrim.
Okay.
But it was good.
It was pretty good.
I thought, you know, I felt, yeah, it was like, all right, let's see.
What God wants to do kind of thing.
You know, somebody had fallen out of somebody's pocket at the gym.
You stay at the gym longer than you thought.
Uh, I don't remember what happened, man.
I mean, it was probably about seven years ago, but so it's been quite a ride
since then.
I don't think it's still in my system.
I don't know what the half-life of like something like that is, you know?
Yeah, no, it's probably only six.
Um, so you are from then.
So yeah, I guess I just, we just want to get to know you.
So.
Okay, let's do it.
You, um, yeah.
And we want to see like, where are you going?
You know, what's going on with this lady, you know?
Okay.
Where am I up to?
Yeah, or just like, yeah, what is, does this lady have a real plan?
Is this lady just kind of living willy-nilly, you know?
Like, what's some of the goal here, I think?
Okay.
So, how does it start?
Like, when are you a child?
When am I a child?
I was a child when I was a child.
Yep.
So I was just like a small child.
Oh, God.
And the first.
Were you big, born big or not?
I, my mom was pregnant for 10 months.
Wow.
Mm-hmm.
So I was born a month late.
I was big.
I was like 31 inches, nine pounds.
Oh, my God.
Yeah.
Really?
Yeah.
That's real.
Dude, I bet they had you fallen into like a fisherman's net.
Yeah.
That seems like really big.
She was real tiny.
They had to do an emergency C-section.
I couldn't fit through the canal.
No.
Really?
Yeah.
Yeah, it was crazy.
So almost like breaking out of a prison cell.
Yeah, I was breaking out of a prison cell.
My parents got, my parents should have never got married.
They got, so they got married when my mom was 10 months pregnant at like a
random gazebo,
a gazebo in Florida.
Oh, yeah.
They'll build those anywhere.
Anywhere.
And she, she had a red, she had a red dress on and they got married.
And then we came back.
I was born and my, my family's kind of crazy.
I have four, I have four siblings.
So my oldest sister, she's 40.
So there's a big age gap.
Okay.
So she's a, she's a blackfisher.
Do you know what a black, blackfishing is?
Is that the thing that, uh, oh yeah.
I think it's like, it's not the thing for SeaWorld.
It's not the, they're not like the people killing the.
No, that's worse.
I think it's, she wants, so she, she gets level four spray tans.
So I, for reference, I get level one spray tan and she'll go and she'll get
level four
and she gets box braids, but she's white.
She drives a Chrysler 300.
She hangs out with all black fishers.
Yeah.
And she, she, she just got out of prison.
She's doing well now, but that's the oldest sister.
So that was like my, that was my role model growing up.
Damn.
Yeah.
She was crazy.
She was?
Yeah.
And she dated a lot of brothers.
Wait, you want to see her?
Yeah, I want to see her.
I want to see if you think she would be black.
Yeah.
She, no, she, she doesn't.
She only dates white guys.
Huh?
Yeah.
It's a crazy thing.
She hangs out with all, I thought she was hanging out with all black people,
but then I realized they
were all black fishers.
And what is black fishers?
You mean like black, they're black fishing.
So you could, this is what you get canceled for nowadays.
If you get too dark, like spray tans or if you wear box braids, which is my
sister.
Oh, I see what you're saying.
Like people that do the chocolate body, like the bar, um, weightlifting.
Yeah.
That's her.
Whoa.
Whoa.
Whoa.
Let me see.
That's a real picture of her.
That's a real picture of her.
That's her Facebook.
That's her Facebook profile picture.
She's a white girl.
God, she's beautiful.
So that's the oldest sister.
She's black fishing.
Wow.
And so that's like fishing for black people.
Like you're trying to catch them or something.
Like, is it like, yeah, but she's never kept, but she's only dating white guys.
So I don't know what she's trying to catch.
Yeah.
That's interesting.
I never, like, we had a lot of like, when I was growing up, they just called
them kind
of wiggas, you know?
It's like, we had like a lot of wiggas back in the day and it was like, you
know, you'd
see like, it was a lot of first gingers were doing it, you know?
Yeah.
Cause I think they were so white that it almost is like, uh, like it's
everything's a spect