Name: Post Dracula Interview | The Adam Friedland Show
Uploaded: 2023-01-14T21:55:51.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Post Dracula Interview | The Adam Friedland Show' from The Adam Friedland Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-01-14. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Post Dracula Interview | The Adam Friedland Show' from The Adam Friedland Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-01-14. Transcript available.

Well, how do you feel?
I thought it went well.
You know, I think I aced the monologue.
I think the guest interview, I don't know.
I think overall is pretty good.
I mean, it depends how you feel.
I mean, we're partners in this.
I feel good, dude.
I feel fucking, I feel powerful as a producer.
Yeah.
I feel, you know, I feel like as you come into your own,
you're going to get more, oh, you want the grape?
It was on the ground, actually.
Sorry.
Yeah, you know, we're going to, it's going to be fun.
We're going to have a fun journey.
And I think the audience is going to be happy with what we did today.
I think so.
People respond to effort, I find.
Yeah.
You know, like if you go to a doctor,
because basically being a comedian, it's like being a surgeon.
In some ways, yeah.
You got to, like society is like a, some, a bitch,
it's got a tumor in her titty.
We dissect the heart and the tumor is laughter.
The tumor is, the tumor is a hard lump in a big tit.
I see what you're saying.
And life is, life is like a titty.
And, but it's a titty that's got cancer.
Yeah.
When you're a kid, life is just, you know,
it's literally, it's a big titty that you can suck on.
And as you get older, it gets cancer in there.
And comedians, they, they, they're as important as surgeons is what I'm saying.
Yeah.
And I forgot where the analogy started, but basically, you know,
like the same way, like people don't give a shit if a comic does bad,
as long as they're, there's a, they see them getting better.
You know, people like the same way a doctor, you know,
if the doctor fucks up surgery.
They just want to see him tomorrow improve.
Right.
Like he fucked up a bit.
Yeah.
You know, he'll go back, he'll listen to the tape.
He'll get it right tomorrow.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
What are some other professions that comedians are like?
The president of the United States?
Yeah.
School, a guy that drives a school bus filled with retarded kids.
But the, wait, no, that's a, nevermind.
Yeah.
I thought for a second, I thought it was inventing a job that would be
prestigious,
but that's a regular job you can have.
Yeah.
No one respects those guys.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because a school bus driver pretty much.
They're just worse at driving.
So they give them retards.
They probably drive those buses drunk more than regular people drive regular
cars drunk.
Exactly.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Can you imagine if you're, if you're this guy who drove the retarded bus,
drove your retarded son to school,
drunk drove the entire,
drunk all of them into a tree.
You got to be like, ah, fuck.
Shit.
Damn.
It's like, their lives must have taken such a sharp turn because they probably
started off
in NASCAR, you know?
Who, the parents of mentally disabled people?
No, the bus drivers for them, you know?
Oh.
And they've like fucked up so many times.
That's how actually short buses started.
It was during the bootlegging era.
Oh, was it?
Yeah.
Yeah.
They would hide liquor in, uh.
Underneath the.
In tiny buses.
And the cops would pull them over and be like,
no, this ain't look like no damn school bus I've ever seen.
And they'd be like, you, are you, you got liquor in here?
Mm-hmm.
And they'd say, no, we're taking, uh, we're taking disabled kids to school.
Yeah.
And the cops would just like, carry on.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, okay.
Everything checks out.
That's where that song, Carry On My Wayward Son.
Oh, he was a wayward son.
Wayward.
Yeah, a little bit wayward.
Yeah, yeah.
Wayward.
R-word.
Carry On My R-Word Son was the original title of the song.
Yeah.
And they had to change it.
So, what do you think, what do you think we would do, what are we going to do
for the
next episode?
I don't know.
This was our most high concept, most ambitious episode today.
You know what we forgot to do?
A theme.
Shit.
And I think the theme is going to be, in retrospect, hasty decisions.
Yeah.
Your hasty decision not to kill yourself.
My hasty decision to kill myself.
To kill yourself.
Which ended up being a good move.
Yeah.
And then my hasty decision to not kill myself.
Which ended up being an even better move.
Because I watched the monologue and I thought it was good.
But I haven't seen how the audience will react to it yet.
Yeah.
I just don't, you know, first off, I don't want to let you down.
I beat the charge, by the way.
Then next is my parents and my family.
I don't want to let them down.
Yeah.
But the third, and very close third, is you.
Is the listener at home.
Is the audience.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So, you guys, you stuck it out.
You stuck with us for another episode of the Adam Friedland Show.
You think this was good?
I think it was.
I think.
Did you have fun?
I had a lot of fun.
Yeah.
I hope they're having fun, too.
I had fun.
It's a nice night.
We did this all in, what, probably 35 minutes?
This episode?
Yeah.
It's the most work we've put into anything.
Yeah.
We put about 35 minutes of work into that.
It is the absolute most work we've put into literally anything we've ever done
together.
Yeah.
I tell you, it gives me a lot more respect for guys who paint rooms.
Yeah.
Oh, they did a great job.
They're kind of like the comedians of the labor force.
That's true.
How much work it takes to paint a room, that's almost like what it's like to be
a stand-up comedian
and fly to Chicago and go to Sweetgreen with Mike Racine.
Yeah.
You know, and folks, I'll be in Irvine, California at the Irvine Improv, August
18th through the 20th.
Yeah.
You can check it out.
And I think that's probably, that's going to do it.
Oh, yeah.
And I'm going to be in September.
I'm going to be in Seattle, Portland, and Los Angeles.
Where are you going to be in Seattle?
What's the name of the venue?
The Crocodile.
The Crocodile Dundee.
No, it's like a, it's like grunge.
It's an Australia.
No, it's like a rocker.
Oh, it's an Australian theme.
No, it's not that vibe.
It's more like Nirvana, Pearl Jam.
Ooh, ain't all the pussy.
Adam Friedland, Nirvana, Pearl Jam, that kind of vibe.
Oh, okay.
Grunge.
Big jeans.
Big jeans, yeah.
Big jeans, long hair.
This is hurting my shoulder to sit like this.
Okay.
In such a horny way.
But thank you guys.
Thank you very much for watching the Adam Friedland Show.
It's a TV show now.
It's a TV show.
We'll see how this translates to audio.
I can't wait to watch.
Yeah.
It would be a dream come true if we could figure out a way to synthesize it too.
No one's ever done that.
No one's ever done a video podcast before.
So we're going to be the first.
This is more of a TV show than a podcast, I think, at this point.
I guess.
Thanks, guys.
Adam, you take it away while the credits roll.
Maybe we'll get a little music going.
What do you want to say?
I don't know.
You say something because we've got to put this.
If you subscribe to the Fire Tears on Patreon, you name in the credits.
So that could be you.
Yeah.
And Adam, go ahead and play this out or something.
That's what Nick and I were just wearing.
So if that wasn't funny, it would probably look pretty funny.
So thanks for supporting the show.
Hope you guys.
That's it, right?
Yeah.
We have a good one.