Name: TOM HOLLAND LIVE IN-STUDIO
Uploaded: 2023-05-11T23:39:36.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'TOM HOLLAND LIVE IN-STUDIO' from The Adam Friedland Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-05-11. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'TOM HOLLAND LIVE IN-STUDIO' from The Adam Friedland Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-05-11. Transcript available.

Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
And welcome to our first, this is a kind of an experiment.
This is our first live episode of the Adam Friedland Show.
Can you turn off the fucking audio in?
I'm not going to hear, I'm not going to hear the show.
I'm not going to hear the audio in the show.
I'm not going to hear the playback.
I'm not going to hear the playback.
I'm not going to hear the playback.
Turn it off.
All right, hello and welcome to the Adam Friedland Show.
This is our first live episode.
Okay, so a little bit of transparency.
We were supposed to have Anthony Scaramucci
from the Trump administration today.
I shit you not, literally we were supposed to have him.
And he had to go to an event for some sort of crypto,
I don't know, scam or I don't know.
But okay, so all day we've had a crew here.
We've been scrambling to get a guest.
The stars aligned and we somehow got,
I don't know, one of the biggest stars in the world.
So ladies and gentlemen, please welcome from Spider-Man
and from, I don't know, what's it called?
Uncharted, the Uncharted movies?
Tom Holland, give it up.
Crew, give it up for him.
- Let's see what's on the line over.
- Tom Holland.
Tom Holland.
- Thanks for being here, Tom.
You look great.
- Single file.
- Yep, you look awesome.
And I can't believe you're here.
A friend of a friend, I know him from the Jewish media.
He got Tom.
- Valuable addition to our modern lifestyle.
- Yeah, okay.
So first question on everyone's minds.
You're famously dating starlet Zendaya.
What's that?
What's that, what's that, what's it like?
You know, are you happy?
- More cheese, Penguins, eh?
- What, I didn't get you.
- Get off me cheese!
Get off!
- Uh-huh, okay, great.
Dating someone with one name.
I mean, could, how do you know you can trust someone?
- He won't go any faster.
- Okay, all right, okay.
- Single file.
- All right.
So, okay, another question.
Does it bother you when people call you Tom the Netherlands?
Is that something that gets on your nerves?
- Tango's are our specialty.
- Uh-huh, okay, nice.
- So you're here to promote--
- The bouncer's gone from his bungee.
- All right, so you're here to promote the film
Mars Attacks from 1996, I understand?
- Right, off we go then.
- Okay, so, yeah, I mean, I guess you want to talk a little bit
about the film Mars Attacks from--
- Get off me cheese!
Get off!
- Uh-huh, okay.
- Oh, well, that ends well, that's what I say.
- Mm-hmm.
- The post, was there, perchance?
- Okay, a lot of people have spec--
- The post, was there, perchance?
- Mm-hmm.
A lot of people have speculated--
- The post, was there, perchance?
- Okay, a lot of, great, we got it.
- Daddy created him for good,
but he's turned out evil.
- Was that a girl voice you were doing there?
- Single file.
- Single file.
Okay, so a lot of people have speculated
that underneath the Spider-Man costume
you have been stuffing in your penis area,
are you natural--
- Not maximum speed.
- Okay, are you natural,
or are you using any type of performance enhancement
in the penis area?
Actually, in the body--
- Surprising what a lick of paint will do, isn't it?
- Mm-hmm, okay.
- A lot of people have also speculated
that Marvel is considering replacing you
with a person of color infant.
Is that something that is,
is there any merit to that, or?
- The bounce has gone from his bungee.
- Mm-hmm, okay.
- The post, was there, perchance?
Do we have a, I didn't really do much prep
for this interview, so I kind of didn't.
- You're at maximum speed.
- Maximum, maximum speed.
Okay, so what was it like working with the,
fucking, what's his name?
Chris Evans, probably.
- Single file.
- Jesus Christ.
That's a good idea.
So you're from England, so recently,
there was a coronation recently, King Charles.
Are you all in on Chuck?
How are you feeling about the monarchy?
- Those are our speciality.
- Oh, cheese penguins, eh?
- Okay.
- My heck.
I thought we were all for the can then.
- Okay.
All right, so.
- Lock me cheese!
Get off!
- So, any projects coming up
that you're excited about, that you're working on?
- I don't know.
- Okay.
- Single file.
- I feel like we're really blowing it right now.
- Surprising what a lick of paint will do, isn't it?
- Okay, how about we go to the chat?
Dave, do we have any questions in the chat for Tom?
- Blomit, let's see what's on the 905, shall we?
- Let's see what's, let's see.
- Let's see.
Dave, let's get a couple questions in the chat
and nothing like I'm gay and my dick is small.
- What's that, perchance?
- Okay, can we get some questions from the chat?
- I've got patent pending on that.
- Let's see.
They're probably just saying terrible things about me.
What's your favorite type?
- There goes me naughty pie.
- What's your favorite type of file?
Adam is a bug?
- Lock me cheese!
Get off!
- I fucking hate this one.
They're chatting too fast.
Can you guys just chat only serious questions, please?
Can we get-- - Leave him, please!
- How do we slow the chat?
- Leave him, please!
- I found out!
- I feel like Hassan Piker right now.
Can we get, uh...
- Just look at that.
I'm down to our last few coppers.
- Let's say, you know, a lot of you people
I'm reading this chat, you think you're better than me,
and it's just, I don't think I'm better than you.
- Oh, what's your favorite superhero movie?
Can you shut up for a second, Tom?
Okay, what's your favorite superhero movie?
- Single file?
- Single file, I don't know about that.
Also, they're saying, I'm reading a lot of disparaging
comments about Jewish people in here.
Dave, could we ban those people that are saying
disparaging comments about Jews or anyone?
- Valuable addition to our modern lifestyle.
- Okay, all right.
So, what's your favorite Dillon album, someone asked.
What is this person's name?
- Single file?
- Single file, I don't think that is one.
- You're at maximum speed.
- How many coppers do you have?
Someone's asking that.
- Single file?
- Single file.
Okay, so Tom.
- Like, off we go then.
- Off we go then, okay.
Let's see, so, yeah, the chat's going too fast.
Dave, can you just get a couple questions and read them to me?
Because I can't follow this.
- What do you feel about Ukraine?
- Oh, Tom, how do you feel about the situation in the Ukraine?
- Single file?
- Zendaya's not from Ukraine.
- Zendaya's not from Ukraine.
That's offensive.
Can we get some real questions?
We have a big guest here.
Can everyone just be mature?
Everyone watching?
Everyone on set right now?
- Oh, cheese, penguin.
Hey.
- What did you say, penguin?
- Oh, cheese, penguin.
Hey.
- Oh, cheese, penguin ding?
What is that?
- Oh, just look at that.
I'm down to my last few coppers.
- Coppers?
What are coppers?
- Single file.
- Is Tom like the WWE?
- Tom, are you a big fan of the WWE?
- The bouncer's gone from his bungee.
- From a what?
- The bouncer's gone from his bungee.
- Oh, cheese, penguin, hey?
- Oh, Tom, your girlfriend is going to be in Dune 2.
What do you do?
Are you planning on watching that?
- Single file.
- What's my hair?
What's wrong with my hair?
Single file.
- The bouncer's gone from his bungee.
- What's his favorite stroke song?
- Oh, that's a good question.
What's your favorite stroke song?
- Do you think that Ricky Griner's phrase was there?
- Oh, that's a good question.
- Tom, how do you feel about the Brittney Griner trade?
- Single file.
- It's been a good experiment.
- Well, the names well, that's what I say.
- Yeah, I agree.
So, should we give it up for our guests today?
- Oh, cheese, penguin, hey?
- Dave, Dave, what's the mood of the chat in there?
Are they happy with this, or--
- Single file?
- Yeah, it's a hit.
- This is a hit.
- More people watching it.
- Let's see what's on the 905, shall we?
- How many people do we have watching right now?
- 2,000.
- Stop gets like a million or something.
2,000 is pathetic.
- You're at maximum speed.
- Tom, are you a fan of crowd work?
- Single file.
- But it's a hit for the 2,000 of them?
- Single file.
- All right, we heard, we heard enough.
- They like the single file.
- So, oh, they like single file?
I guess we gotta do whatever the audience wants.
Can we get another single file?
Come on.
- At maximum speed.
- At maximum speed.
- At maximum speed.
- Yeah.
Yeah, maximum speed, huh?
- Leave him to me.
I'll get the bound up.
- What?
- Like, off we go then.
- Off we go then.
- Oh, jeez, penguins, eh?
- Now they say they want to fight you.
- To fight me?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Oh, jeez, penguins, eh?
- To fight me?
- Yeah.
- Oh, jeez, penguins, eh?
- Oh, jeez, penguins, eh?
- I was gonna say they want to fight you.
- To fight me?
- Yeah.
- I was gonna say they want to fight you.
- To fight me?
- Yeah.
- Dave, what are you--
- Brilliant teamwork, lads.
- What?
- Brilliant teamwork, lads.
- Brilliant teamwork, lads.
Oh, Tom, so you're from--
- My heck, I thought we were all for the can then.
- I guess anything, let's do a poll for the chat.
How many of you want to see me kiss Tom?
- Single file.
- All right, single file?
- Yeah, they want you to kiss everyone.
- Everyone wants me to kiss Tom?
- Yeah, everyone.
- I guess we'll close with a kiss.
- Let's see what's on the 905, shall we?
- Okay, all right.
Well, never kissed a guy before, so we'll--
- Tell me about windows.
- Tell me about windows.
- We'll just--
- Tell me about windows.
- Okay, can you be quiet so we can--
- Tell me about windows.
- Can you just, okay, calm down.
- Just look at that.
I'm down to my last few coppers.
- All right, okay, can you be quiet for a second?
- Oh, I do like a bit of Gorgonzola.
- All right, so here we go, here's a kiss.
- Steady on, watch where you're putting them paws.
- Here's a kiss that the chat wants.
- Steady on, watch where you're putting them paws.
- Okay.
- Drop me cheese, get off!
- All right, thanks.
Ladies and gentlemen, Tom Holland from Spider-Man.
Give it up for him.
Give it up for this guy.
Gorgeous, all right, thank you.
Thanks for everyone for joining us.
- Brilliant teamwork, lads.
- Brilliant teamwork, lads, and to the crew,
great job today.
- And to Anthony Scaramucci, you coward,
I'll see you in two weeks.
- He created him for good, but he's turned out--