Name: The Adam Friedland Show Podcast - Episode 38
Uploaded: 2024-01-29T12:00:15.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Adam Friedland Show Podcast - Episode 38' from The Adam Friedland Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-01-29. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Adam Friedland Show Podcast - Episode 38' from The Adam Friedland Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-01-29. Transcript available.

The Adam Friedland Show Podcast - Episode 38

hello and welcome to the adam friedland show podcast nick once again is not
here he will be
back he's uh on special assignment right now you guys are gonna find out why
maybe in the next six
months i was gonna say in a couple weeks but everything is taking forever right
now we have
two special guests you guys want to introduce yourselves from the joy tactics
podcast hello
jack ben singer i make up one of the three members of joy tactics it's a good
intro wow what's up
everybody my name is eric ray hill and i'm another member of the joy tactics
podcast is that how you
start everything is you make the people slate is that normal or is it because
we're not we're kind
i really think it's it's an incredibly unpleasant thing to do to a guest it is
kind of a little bit
of a sinister evil thing and i don't know why because i want we bodied it you
kind of well you
said what's up so it was well i made it casual immediately yeah put it put he
was on the spot
he was sweating he was freaking out yeah but that's how you got somebody that's
how you get the nerves
out and get to a really good military military military military as well yeah
do you ever consider
military when i was a child really what branch tank
really yeah i really did want to be a tank driver driver well and operator
driver what's the
difference operator and driver i think that because the operators are firing
the the gut cannons uh-huh
so you want to do but no tank driver with the pistol out the fucking little
slit uh-huh oh that's good
driving you don't have enough hands for all that brother yeah not yet you could
somebody else pistol
missile and then all right leave the missile to someone else but give me the
pistol take the wheel
all right i don't i wouldn't be like that did you see that pamela tom uh porn
when we were kids on a boat
on the boat right wait i did see it i didn't see navy style i got really sad
when i was like a little kid i saw that
and i saw him driving the boat with his penis and i was like he did he really
was tommy lee
yeah he's got dick on the wheel or on the gas yeah like massive johnson and i
was like i'm never gonna get married
i could never drive a boat is that that guy has obviously an average size penis
right but now look who she's with she's with the nerd edward snowden
mm-hmm that's what happens no she's not with the song oh yeah
is that allowed what's her name anna nicole smith no pamela anderson all right
pamela anderson
put some respect an enemy of the state so can't she and jis lane be in the same
type of
how is she not now under arrest how do you get that name wrong how do you mean
before the episode
you said i've never seen the office i'm a hipster i only know skateboard yeah
and now you called
the most beautiful woman of our lives she's lying the wrong name well they're
not
how cute it is it's so easy to deal with this because a lot of people would
come confrontational
i'm sorry now we move that's how we do it on our podcast clean and you want to
know i'm sorry is
actually like that i'm sorry fire thanks really i look like shit right now you
do no yeah you went
polite oh i thought oh yeah you look great i look shit i look yeah yeah no you
have a dog and there's
no hair on your hat you know what i'm saying wow are you lint rolling before
you leave the apartment
um no i just you don't i keep the dog outside
outside in brooklyn on the fire escape yeah classic yeah it's like a
neighborhood watch the south thing
fame has gotten to you yeah i taught your dogs can you persecute a dog if it
kills somebody no i don't
yeah persecute you mean like in a court yeah i know that it's not you
definitely that's funny to say
persecute though why that's the right word if you're like a like a terrible
murderer and then
i'm gonna say i'm i'm being persecuted for a violent crime that's what you're
saying like you're the
victim like the moral thing like you're the victim yeah right yeah well so she's
with julian assange
but just friends right no he's hitting it no you don't chill with julian but he's
inside he's doing
assange's back shots no no constant no he's respectful no he think you think he's
been assange
that he's all about the brain but there's always those types he did it it's his
riz it's a riz style
yeah it's left riz yeah why haven't they made a movie about him yet assange
yeah because they
made snowden with what's his name what will smith no they made the edward snowden
movie with um
joseph gordon levitt right oh remember that no no everybody go watch that one
of the most beautiful
who was in it joseph gordon levitt mr levitt and what's there because they have
to pick a side
i don't know i don't know
who has to pick the side the audience the filmmakers responsibility oh are you
going to condone what
julian assange has done to this edward snowden and not edward norton jack is
like so nervous
no i'm not man i just know that fucking julian assange is going to be watching
this from fucking
moscow i bet he probably could be he yeah it might be is he on curious twitter
is he on what twitter
still i don't know i don't use it you're off of off of it yeah i don't know i
have a girlfriend there's no
yeah that's nice yeah so you don't need the big tommy lee style penis to fall
in love i still think i do
timothy tommy lee i still think that i still think they want me to drive a boat
with my penis
even if that even if i can't and they're like i don't care about that kind of
stuff i'm like
come on it how it doesn't need to be big to drive a p to drive a p do you want
to own a boat adam you
want a boat badly um i'm not responsible enough so you want to lease one and
you want to hire a
driver uh you want to have a below deck style crew yeah i don't be but they'd
be like conspiring
against me no no they love you no they'd be like all fans no oh the people who
work for you even in
this building are like so much so happy no but if they loved you like crazy
would you want a crew
no then that weird too much power yeah yeah i don't want them to put me on a
pedestal respect i want
them to see my flaws you know yeah yeah you're different co-op yacht co-op
yacht right what you
share with other people yeah everybody who would you want to share it with ryan
reynolds ron gosling
oh my ryan you gosling reynolds jackman freshly divorced he's kind of doing his
playboy
shit huge jackman yeah you could i thought you said jackman jackman jackman
yeah yeah call my name now
oh jack oh jack man yeah you try to start that as a nickname jack man yeah that'd
be cool man have
you ever tried to start your own nickname before the cube it's a really
pathetic
move to like to be like you have to be granted one my friend before college he
made his facebook
uh uh name uh like he had a nickname in quotes that he given himself called
last cup
last what last cup because in oh but in pong he always has that last cup oh and
then people that
were at the college were like let's bully last cup um when he gets to school
next year
you know i'd kick his ass there was a guy that went to my college who had a bad
drinking problem and
they were doing vodka shots vodka pong drinking you know shots of vodka instead
of beer that's not funny
and he went to the hospital one night after playing that nearly died had to get
a i believe a liver
transplant and after college went around the country touring talking about the
dangers of alcohol as a
comedian so he turned that into a yeah as a comedian no it was an a-list
comedian it was you can't say who
man you can't say it's kevin hart really you went to college with him yeah a
little older than i seem
where'd you go to college pace university right yeah no i remember thinking i
wanted to go to pace
university because that was where the inside the actor studio was wow mr cooper
no was that um no it was
pace where is that no it was at uh the new school i thought no it's i believe
it maybe they switched but
at some point it was pace university that's kind of my career goal is to james
lipson to really yeah
well he's gone you're not to beat his ass to beat james listens no to be
listening oh to be him well
you're on the way you're on the track yeah oh we gotta get you at award shows
oh oscars uh-huh
at the globes how do you see him like a ricky gervais style like killing truth
yeah you crazy man
yeah who's gonna defend you your god you guys all like to get me me too i know
y'all like to get me too
with whatever y'all like getting me too'd that's good he he did that at the
golden globes dude he
said y'all yeah he's british i know y'all meryl streep was like yeah dapped him
up yeah no she was
like raising her hand oh it was a rhetorical she's always there she's always
there dude i'm sick of
her she was yo no she was missing from the emmys she's missing she was missing
from she doesn't do tv
dude she's too that's what it is but her daughter does on the gold the gilded
age who's her daughter
she's the star of the gilded age that's cool really what's that show about it's
about the
uh age of concern can we do this with the strike huh the strike's over brother
where you've been dude
you've been asleep jack's been i've been on the picket line really yeah no
sorry what's the gilded age
it's about oh y'all probably wondering about the gilded age let's hear about
new york late 1800s but
it's about a wealth gap it's kind of about new money coming into vanderbilt
style money yeah coming
into and who plays the old money the old money they're all just kind of like oh
you know who plays
old money is what's her red hair from sex in the city isla fisher miranda miranda
is but she's kind
of nice one of my favorite actors of all time i know she's great she's
politically minded what as
well oh you've never seen sex in the city no let's ask her what the actor's
name was uh you don't like
that i haven't seen a lot of tv shows have you seen that one no it's the best
it was one of the best
sex in the city i gotta see you'd like it yeah well i should i should look to
it then yeah i actually
when i was a kid the first time i watched it because it had sex in it i thought
i was like
i'm gonna try a beat did you want to date carrie no i hate carrie really you
had the instant even
though she's so sexy me nuts she drives me nuts you had the instinct as a child
too much i'm a charlotte
man charlotte she's so charlotte has taste just she's too perfect you know what
i'm saying and
samantha i she's a freak sexual freak freak though okay so samantha's a freak
charlotte's annoying
no you put that on no no i'm not why did you yeah he's awesome for the people
like me who are alphas
who like basketball and yeah who didn't watch these shows you don't like
basketball i love that i've
talked to you about it before your waist is six do this to me publicly your
waist is six eight one
time i asked you if you've done uh dunked before and you were like offended
about it as if it's your
identity or something oh i'm so sick of people asking if i don't dunk dunk with
the walls i'm sick of it
look at the why the why because i can't do it man i'm six five and i can't dunk
it's pathetic it's
it's i would die tomorrow from one dunk in game what about slam if you did a
dunk you'd pass away
from excitement i would make a deal with the devil oh yeah give me one and then
i die what about just
lower the hoop then doesn't count you want it to be for the glory lower the
hoop i was just watching
a highlight reel of people who are five six dunking they could do that a lot of
them who's the littlest
person ever to be in the nba oh mugsy bogues duh what and how tall was he five
five eight five
three five three what year was this 1936 the 1990s no really really five three
in the mugsie bones
bogues but who do you play for like cigs oh okay i don't call him that i don't
know that's cool
that's it uh no yeah he played for the charlotte uh horn is he shooting threes
is he slicing he was just
cooking achilles slicing the achilles breaking the legs checking that's kill
bill dude oh go