Name: The Adam Friedland Show Podcast - Nathan Macintosh - Episode 66
Uploaded: 2024-08-10T13:30:32.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Adam Friedland Show Podcast - Nathan Macintosh - Episode 66' from The Adam Friedland Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-08-10. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Adam Friedland Show Podcast - Nathan Macintosh - Episode 66' from The Adam Friedland Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-08-10. Transcript available.

The Adam Friedland Show Podcast - Nathan Macintosh - Episode 66

But they remade it, right?
Okay, so the deal was he was just like 5'2",
but like got a lot of pussy or something?
I don't know if he got a lot of pussy.
I think that was Dudley Moore's thing,
was that he was 5'2", and he got a lot of pussy.
He himself or in the movie Arthur?
I think he was a sex symbol.
He was in the movie 10 as well with Bo Derek.
I've seen neither of those movies.
That's the one with the girl.
She has cornrows.
Yeah.
A white girl.
Bo Derek, yeah.
You know a lot more about Dudley Moore than I do,
and I've seen one of his movies.
You saw Arthur.
I saw Arthur.
Right.
And his sister is like a bitch to him.
In the movie?
I thought he's like an aardvark,
and he's like trying his best at school,
but his sister, DW, fucks things up for him.
That's the cartoon version,
but the live-action version, it was a different thing.
So that's like the Batman the Animated Series,
and then that's like you're talking about the Dark Knight version.
Well, yeah, and you're kind of referencing almost like Arthur Beyond.
Oh, okay.
You know what I mean?
Oh, yeah, yeah.
The Spider-Verse kind of version.
Yeah, it's a Spider-Verse type of thing.
So Dudley Moore was Arthur, but before aardvark.
It's like before, I think, you know,
now that I'm thinking of it,
I think it might have been his journey to aardvark in the movie.
What happens?
He gets drunk, and he meets Liza Minnelli,
and I think she has powers.
I might be fucking this up, but she...
And she's a 10 out of 10 in this.
I'd say 11, honestly.
Really?
When I was a kid, oh, yeah, absolutely.
When I was like 8, 9, that's what you're...
Liza Minnelli.
For me, yeah.
You're homosexual?
I was.
That's like...
If you're like a gay icon,
you have a career until you're dead.
Yes.
They never leave.
No.
They are the most ride-or-die fan base you could have.
Yeah, I'm not in there.
I'll die.
You'll die?
You're gonna die?
What?
I'm not...
They'll let me die, is what I'm saying.
I'm not in that...
I'm not gonna be on the cruise ship in 30 years with Cyndi Lauper,
is what I'm saying.
Oh, when you said let me die,
I thought about the AIDS crisis in the 1980s
and the government knew it was happening and it was a...
Did they know...
Well, this is another theme of Arthur.
Really?
He means...
So he's in Greenwich Village.
He's in Greenwich Village.
He's in a limo.
He's cruising.
Cruising.
Yeah.
For...
I don't know if it's...
We don't get to that point.
Okay, is this the baby version cartoon or the live action?
The more real...
Okay, so it's a little bit more raw.
You see...
Yes.
You see penetration.
You see penetration.
You see stroking.
The cartoon is kind of more soft core version of Arthur?
A hundred percent.
It starts on penetration, Arthur.
Really?
Yeah.
And that song, Christopher Cross is playing.
When you get lost between the moon and New York City.
And in the movie, you haven't really seen it,
but Arthur, this guy's ass cheek is New York
and this guy's ass...
This side is the moon.
Yeah.
You know, originally...
And he said when you get lost...
It was when you get cock between the moon and New York City.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, but they...
And then there were like...
The Jews that run Hollywood were like,
come on, we can't...
We want to put this on the radio.
We can't...
Yeah, caught.
Caught.
Caught.
Caught.
This is a family hardcore gay pornography film.
We can't say cock in the song.
Have a little clue.
G-A...
G-H-T, please.
Yeah, G-H-T.
So he's cruising...
Well, after he pounds the man,
then he's cruising...
Oh, he's a pound job.
He's pound...
He does the pounding.
Okay, because sometimes it could be a power bottom
and the bottom could be pounding you.
No.
No, so he's an active top.
And that's why the movie...
He's a dom daddy.
Yeah, because he's 5'2".
He's 5'2".
And then you think he's going to be pounded
because he's such a small little...
You can just grab him and fuck him type guy,
but not Dudley Moore.
He's so drunk, he has like...
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know what I mean?
It's like when you see a little dog
fucking a bigger dog.
Yeah, like a chihuahua
fucking like a pit bull or something.
Yes, he's...
So anyway, he pounds the guy.
He pounds the guy and he comes
and that's a scene that lasts about three minutes.
He comes or his lover comes first?
He comes.
Oh, he doesn't come.
He doesn't even care.
He can't care.
He's Dudley Moore.
He's got a limo waiting outside.
Yeah, okay, because my lover comes first.
But if you have a limo outside waiting for you,
you can't wait for the other guy to come.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's you.
The guy's on a clock.
Uh-huh.
So he comes...
Kennedy style.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
He comes hard and it's a pretty long scene.
What would you define hard coming from?
I mean, he gets pushed back into a wall.
He screams.
Oh, he does a Tennessee pile driver.
I think that's what it's called.
Well, you know what that is.
You're fucking on a drywall wall and then you smash your lover through the wall.
I've never heard of that.
But I've never...
It's just Tennessee because there's drywall everywhere.
That's vanilla.
No, no, no, no.
Sometimes you could have a kind of a more of a...
What's a...
What's a sheet...
Sheet rock.
But that is drywall.
Plaster?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's tough.
If you're in Italy, you can't be, like, smashing through a wall because they're
not using this
American crap, you know, construction techniques, you know?
I was going to say, yeah, they made it so that you couldn't pound right through
the wall
because people were, before they did those walls, pounding right through the
wall.
Because they had the Romans, you know?
So he comes hard.
He hits the wall.
He kind of hits his head, too, and he says, ow, but he's still coming very,
like...
It's hard.
It's a lot.
He covers the guy.
And it's cool because you have, like, the shape of the gay sex in the...
Like, the Kool-Aid man runs through a door, and then you have the Kool-Aid man
shape.
Yeah.
But you have him doing the Patrick Bateman muscles, his lover, you know, in excruciating
pain.
Yeah, he really fucked him.
And he also, it's, like, dented like this.
Like, he's like, ow, and holds his head.
And for the guy that he pounded, it's pretty good because now he has...
Forget a phone number.
You have the guy that fucked you imprinted on your wall for life.
Yeah, it's kind of a Cinderella.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So he comes, and then he goes right back downstairs to the limo where the guy's
been, like, come on, man.
This is really getting insane.
That's when the Christopher Cross song ends.
Okay.
And now he's cruising.
Now he's cruising.
Now he's cruising.
And from what I remember, man, I saw this movie as a kid, but...
So he gets in the car.
I'm on the edge of my seat, you know.
He gets in the car, and he's driving, and Liza Minnelli...
Did you ever see the movie Thinner?
What is that?
It's like a pro-anorexic style, like...
Kind of.
It's crazy that gay guys tell women, they're like, don't eat.
And they listen to gay guys?
Women really like...
Why don't they listen to us say...
And what we say is massive tits, massive ass.
But they want to listen to gay guys saying, you know, just go to the hospital
for not eating.
Yeah, I think, well, one, there's...
Gay guys want them to do that to be like a hanger, right?
Just for, like, clothes?
Just to, like, show off clothes?
So in a gay guy's closet, they just have anorexic women...
Yeah.
...just wearing their clothes?
Yes.
Yeah.
Or a woman's clothes to just see what it looks like on a runway or whatever.
Is a hanger a gay...
Hang...
I thought it was a...
A hag.
Hang...
Oh, a hanger, like a...
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
But it could be...
It could be...
I don't know.
I don't know where the term came from.
Hanger is...
It's got a...
It's got a checkered history.
I think so.
Clothing holder is what I...
I won't even say hanger.
Because hanger also implies the abortion ban.
You know, you don't want to go there.
That's true.
Yeah.
You can't...
You can only do that with an old school hanger, though.
Those wooden ones, you can't fucking...
You're going to kill yourself.
Also, when it comes to hangers, you think Johnny Drama.
Your brother's the star.
But you're living in the mansion.
You're also getting pussy.
You're arguing with Turtle.
You know, like, why don't you start...
You know, get your career back.
It's a hanging.
I think...
Maybe women think, too, that straight men dislike them more than gay men.
But I think gay men dislike them more than straight men.
They...
I think gay men are like, let's see how many women we can kill.
Yes.
I think...
I think if we were on an island...
If it was you and me on an island, and a gay guy could hang out,
with all of the women, or us, he's coming over here.
And we're going to tell him about, you know, Arthur.
Yeah.
We're just trying to talk about movies.
So he's cruising.
The conversations that we have are so much better than whatever the fuck they're
talking about.
It's...
Yeah.
I don't know what's going on over there.
Wildness.
Useless.
Yeah, Brad.
Yeah.
Oh, God.
I'd love to be on a jet.
Who doesn't want to be on a jet?
On a jet.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
They say the most...
What are you in first grade?
Everyone knows that.
Thinner might have been about anorexia, but there's an...
There's an...
Actually...
Wait.
Fuck, man.
What was thinner?
No, you're right.
It is kind...
Dude.
I'm thinking about the...
Oh, no.
It's a...
Someone gets cursed and he keeps losing weight.
Okay, yeah.
I remember that.
But he keeps getting fucking thinner.
But it...
What?
Who's this...
Kevin Bacon?
No.
Who's...
I think it might have been Kevin Bacon.
Do you know what his original name was, by the way?
Francis Bacon.
Yeah.
Yes.
Mm-hmm.
Not a lot of people know that.
Mm-hmm.
So I just...
You know...
Yeah.
But he's driving...
I mean, it was Kevin Hirsch...
Hirschkowitz, but he's like, you can never be in this industry as a Jewish
person.
Mm-hmm.
There's never been a Jew in show business.
What's the least Jewish name?
Bacon.
You know...
The exact opposite.
It's the exact opposite.
Bacon.
Kevin Haram.
Kevin Sharia Law.
Bacon.
Bacon.
It's bacon.
I gotta drop this whole image I have.
What can I do?
Buddy, call yourself Pork Bacon.
One of Nick's favorite things is that there is a fat actor named Jonathan Candy.
Oh.
Yeah, yeah.
A little on the nose.
From Canada.
From the...
Well, he was the bottom in the Dudley Moore...
The opening scene.
I fucking forgot that.
It was one of his first roles.
It was one of his first roles.
And he was funny in that scene, too.
He was funny.
He was pretty funny.
When he gets the cum right in his face...
Because the thing is...
When he's smashing through that wall...
Yeah.
He got that five-foot-two chihuahua on the back of him.
And he makes the chihuahua noises.
You really gotta watch this movie.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The beginning is insane.
But, John...
America likes to make fun of Canadians.
And so that's what they did.
They said, look, we'll put you in a lot of movies and stuff.
But, John, your first one's gonna be tough.
You're pounded in the ass by that guy.
But it's a foot in the door.
It's a lot of things in the door.
Yeah, yeah.
It's an ass in the door.
It's your balls in the door.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
His dick was shown fully.
Erect and soft, which I thought was pretty rough.
It's a foot in the door.
It's a body through the wall.
Yes.
Yes.
That's what they used to say in the 80s.
That was kind of an old, like, golden era Hollywood...
It's a body through the wall.
A body through the wall.
It's a cum shot right in the eyes.
You're gonna get Tennessee pile-driven.
Yeah.
And he's like, I'm Canadian.
I don't know...
I don't know.
Where is Tennessee?
You're the only Tennessee...
Yeah, they show it to him on a map.
He's like, I still don't know.
And they're like, look, bend over.
Here's Dudley Moore.
Because, like you said, it was full penetration.
I can't believe I saw this actually.
You remember the trailer?
They were like, Arthur, this time, fucking, for real in a movie.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, because th