Name: The Adam Friedland Show Podcast - Jamie Wolf - Episode 77
Uploaded: 2024-10-25T19:00:13.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Adam Friedland Show Podcast - Jamie Wolf - Episode 77' from The Adam Friedland Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-10-25. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Adam Friedland Show Podcast - Jamie Wolf - Episode 77' from The Adam Friedland Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-10-25. Transcript available.

The Adam Friedland Show Podcast - Jamie Wolf - Episode 77

dude they're so they're losing it over this trump mcdonald's thing i think that
i think he's gonna win dude he might see him do 25 minutes because if you're
like a if you're an
undecided voter and you're saying oh it's a threat to democracy all these
things which very
well may be true but then it's like he just hands somebody fries at mcdonald's
and they're like this
is fascism you're like well i know that isn't you know what i mean i know
working at mcdonald's
isn't fascism yeah it can't be everything yeah right exactly he's just he the
stuff when and i
wanted i got mcdonald's after that i was like that makes me miss mcdonald's
yeah i got it as a kid you
go to mcdonald's and donald trump would be working there did you get the the
chicken big mac looks
terrible you have to try it i tried it the mature response is that it is
neither as good as the big
mac nor the mcchicken but it is a noble attempt at a new menu item wait why is
that the mature response
it's because when you've had enough mcdonald's if we're being honest the mcdonald's
menu is not what
it used to be it had kind of a renaissance in like 2008 when they introduced
the chicken selects
and then they got you have it i have it once a week welcome to the adam friedland
show
that's our new banter segment before we do our welcome the adam friedland show
mcdonald's a
fascist institution the fascist and did you see this i saw this on msnbc the
other night they
talked to real fry cooks apparently donald trump made the fries wrong can you
believe that this
man's unfit to be president were people tweeting about that he made the fries
wrong he didn't have
a hairnet on i mean it's like who's this guy adolf hitler yeah you know who
would do that adolf hitler
and stalin both of them yeah he's both hitler and stalin and darth vader yeah
that's who would
who would uh and the meryl streep the devil wears prada yeah he didn't have the
headset on which you
need for the drive-thru so that's how you know it was staged oh it was it was
complete that was
staged it was staged yeah oh my god which you know i mean if he's gonna lie
about working at mcdonald's
what else would he lie about everything yeah it was directed by stanley kubrick
who did the moon
landing as well i don't know if you knew that his mcdonald's appearance is yeah
yeah it's it's it's state
media uh you know this is nothing you see is real nothing you see what happens
to kamala if she loses
um she gets a promotion somehow no it's not because it's not like she can be on
cnn
you know what i mean why because she's not she can't really communicate yeah
she's not good off
the cuff yeah she's not like she's gonna be a talking head yeah on anything she
starts a foundation
and then somehow makes she should have a youtube channel for like purses or
something or candles
oh that'd be cool i could get ready with me kind of yeah yeah yeah but do you
think she even knows
that stuff what do you mean i feel like she's just like no there's got to be
like she's a human being
i'm sure she has interests that they're like you can't tell people whenever she's
expressed
whenever she's expressed what those interests are it's like no like like when
she was like two pack
but that's not what i mean that's yeah that's fake right so what that's like
focus group tested
yeah right she has to actually have some kind of like fixation what do you
think it is for her i
would imagine yeah candles joking maybe joking what's joking i don't even know
what that is uh it's
stretching your penis it's like an arab word for jacking off yeah they don't
have jacking off there
so that it's like a secret thing uh our guests say jamie wolf i had a crazy
weekend i was in tacoma
doing the club there yikes and my hotel i get there and it looked like they
were setting up for like
prom it was like a dance or something i couldn't tell if it was a wedding or a
dance but there was
like the people were dressed wrong like the it was mostly women mostly heavy
set women and they
were like wearing like the clothes were like too fancy you know for for it to
be like a wedding or
something and i'm like what is this and i figured out it's a convention and it's
a convention for
female like self-published fantasy smut and so it was like the the dragon queen's
like like uh harem
you know it's like all these like self-published books and all the authors are
there yeah and they're
all named like devon or dakota they all have like obese pen names and there's
people getting like books
signed and stuff i don't want to be like too mean about it but it was bizarre
and then that had overlap with
like the filipino seattle communities like they had their like 89th gala at the
hotel so then it was
like those two groups seeing these two groups yeah intersect did they intersect
at all was it a melting pot
in the in the market so you'd see everybody having coffee and it would be like
it would be like uh
like a lesbian couple wearing fucking literally jack skellington onesies having
coffee next to
like a 55 year old filipino thing but it was very funny because like who they
got so for the filipino
community for their evenings entertainment is they had two principal dancers
from the pacific northwest
ballet doing swan lake and then they had like uh and then but then the the
obese writer community
they had like an enchanted forest ball with it featuring cosplay you know so
imagine walking into the wrong room you know
i the filipinos out of all people on earth like to have the most fun they are
the most they are the
well i would say they got upstaged by the uh really yeah because i i was like
looking into what these
books are you know and it's it is a lot of because it's like uh it's it's i i
would imagine this is all
an outgrowth of the success of 50 shades of gray right yeah all of the books
are you know yeah it's
like self-published stuff but then the plot lines are always like oh they have
it's like it's called the omega sphere
and so women write about it where there's like alphas and betas and then omegas
and omegas are
like the sex slaves basically but in their world it's like men who are enslaved
to
fuck no it's the women are enslaved and they have to find a pack of alphas but
then there's all of
these things that are givens within the genre such as like nodding and scent
matching so like people
like the alphas have like packs so then they'll describe it it'll be like oh it's
like you know
it's like two more years so i get my trust fund luckily i found a pack of alphas
and they
and they they nodded me which means they have so in the omega sphere
the man's penis has a knot like a dog's penis so it gets stuck in the woman's
vagina or ass
and uh what yeah and these are things that are just like given so you'll be
reading the name of
this event did it have a name this convention yes it was it was called books
gowns and crowns
and this one was chapter three i did some light googling i guess there was
controversy this year
because of some transphobia at the last there was in the omegasphere in the omegasphere
how could you be transphobic if you have like a knot on your penis i don't know
i have no idea yeah
it's like they're dogs or but there wasn't it wasn't like a furry thing it was
just how i don't i don't
want to in my imagination this is one of the fattest lady events i can imagine
surprisingly a lot of them
were like i would say like not unattractive but then they had their husbands
there with them that was
oh my god i did a lot of eavesdropping were there like are their husbands like
alphas i think their
husbands are guys who just kind of nailed it i imagine that these women like
just do everything
and then they're like yeah my wife she like self-publishes books and i kind of
really don't do
i don't really do much anything i just come to these conventions and you know
just kind of show
up yeah right yeah give her the books to be signed right yeah that that's crazy
that they're transphobic
that's what gets me i yeah that's phobia in that community i think that computes
for you i can't
imagine one of those things would exist without some kind of controversy you
know what i mean i
imagine yeah very 65 years old core of all of it they're all dramatists you
know i mean yeah
so they're addicted to stories and and narrative right and so there has to be
there has to be some
kind of conflict it's just funny to be like a right-wing political commentator
who also
makes those like men women have vaginas and men have knotted penises that they
put i wouldn't say
it's right i'm sure it was something it was probably something simple like they
didn't have enough
bathrooms at the last event and then you know somebody didn't apologize the
right way no i
think it's probably like because no you've seen that you've seen that dsa video
where that that
trans person gets mad because somebody said guys we got a it's a big year
coming up not use gendered
language please stop saying guys and then just that that poor woman hosting had
to be like oh okay yeah
mm-hmm yep yeah definitely um no i imagine like it's in that generation of like
feminists
like that's where you find the uh turfs okay because they're like we're writing
these books and it's
very like liberating for women talking about our like sexual proclivities and
bondage and stuff
and uh but yeah yeah that generation of feminists is typically like the the jk
rowlings of the world
right it's typically where you find the like ones that are like well you don't
have periods you weren't
with us uh burning our bras and getting raw dogged at woodstock
where were you when when i was when my my vagina was just being penetrated
when my incredibly hairy bush was being penetrated and then i did nothing for
the rest of my life
but i pretended that that makes me a former feminist revolutionary yeah true
yeah it's so it's just
weird to me to be that you know that that into like sexual fantasy and that
open-minded except when
it comes to the weirdest part for me is that like this is would all fall ostensibly
under the nerd
umbrella you know like i mean the male equivalent would be like a i don't know
like a star trek
convention or something you know or something for like roblox perhaps but um
they're still writing
the books which requires like a certain degree of effort and discipline so they're
like they're
still very productive which is like counter to i guess what the male version
would be where it's like
these guys aren't even taking a shower you know i mean they do nothing they
just consume that's the
thing that's like annoying about like the guy versions of those it's like
people that show up and they have
expertise in consumption like they don't make anything they don't fucking do it
they just have they
don't even make the costumes not the star trek guys they fucking buy those if
they're if they're at the
point where they have to make their own costumes they should be getting gastric
bypass surgery
which they can't even do that they can't even go on their own diets yeah so it's
like you see them
and it's like you know you want to imagine them as being lazy but then it's
like well this woman's
written 17 books yeah you know and that's that's crazy to me yeah there has to
be so much caddy in
fighting though like uh ladies that have read other ladies books and then say
that they're not as
as disgustingly horny if your mom is going to that also i mean i feel bad for
the kids yeah those
people yeah my my aunt wrote sort of a book like this she's um she wrote kind
of a sci-fi version of
this it was sort of smart the the main character in the book was 14 years old
this is all true it's
it's a 14 year old main character she was married she's now divorced the the
main character was 14
years old and she marries like a 43 year old guy in the book and they they like
so she wrote the
quran yeah she wrote it's sort of yeah it's a muslim i'm just kidding that's i
don't know if that's even
in there we don't need to shit on the quran on th