Name: Adam Friedland: Two Nights In London | Comedy Special EP
Uploaded: 2024-11-01T22:59:44.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Adam Friedland: Two Nights In London | Comedy Special EP' from The Adam Friedland Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-11-01. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Adam Friedland: Two Nights In London | Comedy Special EP' from The Adam Friedland Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-11-01. Transcript available.

Freedom's really in the zone right now. He's so focused, he's so passionate and
driven for his
audience. He thinks about his crowd, he thinks about his audience, thinks about
comedy. I've
never seen anything, I've never experienced anything like it really. That's why
he's one of the greats.
"Are you guys ready for what you came for? Are you guys ready to see Adam Friedland?"
"Remember, before you go out there, remember what your mother said to you
before she died. You are a terrible comedian!"
"In the inverse words!"
"Adam Friedland!"
"Remember!"
I'm trying to take the earth, I'm trying to take the earth.
I'm trying to take the earth, I'm trying to take the earth, I'm trying to die,
I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm
trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm
trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm
trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm
trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm
trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm
trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm
trying to die, I'm trying to die
I'm trying to take the earth, I'm trying to take the earth, I'm trying to take
the earth,
I'm trying to take the earth, I'm trying to take the earth, I'm trying to take
the earth, I'm trying to take the earth.
Israel has a right to defend itself.
This is what it's all about, London, where are we?
Shepherds Bush.
That's something, dude, that's something right there, Shepherds Bush.
It's always good when you're coming up and you're set three minutes before you
go.
Always nice.
What's going on, David?
Hold on, I'm not really paying much attention.
They might go to war with Iran?
What, are they going to fight over Cologne?
Ah, man.
They can't be good, right?
Over there?
I remember after October 7th, I said, that was the first thing I said, I said,
"Can't be good."
Can't be good for them, obviously, over there, but for, for me.
I don't know if you guys know who I am, I am one of the most cyber-bullied Jews
on earth.
Are you guys considering anti-Semitism of a lot of people?
Because I see a lot of the cogs turning in your heads.
I see a lot of you guys starting to ask the right questions.
What are you planning?
I think they're going to take our banks.
You're going to take our banks?
Take the banks.
I wasn't using the banks.
Take the weather machines, I don't know.
I wasn't using the weather machines.
What else?
We gave you the island already.
We gave you a good island, a Jewish island, and the...
Little St. James Island.
Just don't take Hollywood, please.
Why aren't you laughing now?
What, are you going to take Hollywood?
Come on.
Who are we going to give Hollywood to?
What, are we going to give the Chinese guys?
Come on.
Come on.
What the hell kind of movies are they going to make?
Oh, going to work one.
Going to work two.
Come on.
Come on.
Leave it to us.
Jewish pedophiles.
Leave it to us.
Come on.
Leave it to...
Nonsense.
Leave it to Jewish.
Nonsense.
Why do you guys use that word?
It's such a nice word for such a terrible thing.
Oh, I nonced him.
You guys built an empire on that.
On noncing.
You did.
You went around the world noncing.
Then you control the entire planet.
You people.
Look at you.
It's disgusting.
I mean, it's hilarious.
That you people.
Some of the most pathetic people I've ever looked at.
You got good at boats.
And then you got off the boat and you're like, yeah, we're here to nonce.
And then you wrote love poetry about a beautiful Ottoman boy or something.
This guy's like...
You're so funny about that, huh?
It's funny.
You guys molested people all over the world.
It's funny.
And you had to give it up.
And you had to come back here to this shitty place.
And be like, oh, that was weird.
That was weird.
It was funny.
The way you guys said goodbye to the ruling the world.
You'd lower a flag.
You'd have like a soldier lowering a flag.
And then you'd like kiss the Moogle boy lover.
Goodbye.
And then you'd wave.
You'd say bye.
It's time to nonce yourselves.
Now you can molest yourselves.
That's how you lost your empire.
We're losing an empire in my country right now.
I think what we had was the Biden-Trump debate.
We had, if you close your eyes, something that sounded like two tramps just
warming their hands.
By a barrel.
With a fire in it.
That was great.
That's better than you pedophiles.
We just got two guys waiting for a bus.
I miss Biden.
You guys remember this guy?
I miss him.
They took him away from us.
The election was really sad.
We were watching a man die.
We were watching a man die on TV.
We all had to sit there watching it like, "Oh my God, is he dead yet?"
And then they took him away the second he did one funny thing.
He did the first funny thing.
I was like, "Finally!
One funny part!"
And he was like, "Ladies."
When he called Zelensky, he was like, "Ladies and gentlemen, President Putin."
And the second he did that, the Jewish media had to take him away.
And he had to come home and now it's not funny anymore.
People are losing their minds about the fucking election right now in America.
I don't know.
Do you guys care?
None?
No.
No.
I don't like it.
I have a girlfriend.
I don't care.
I get pussy.
Why would I care?
People are losing their minds.
The parents.
The parents are not taking it well right now.
My dad called me on the phone the other day.
I, I'm like, "You can go to jail for, like, Instagram here, okay?"
I'm like, scared.
You know how free speech?
Shocking performance, Adam Friedman.
In the dodgy bit of Shepherd's Bush.
My dad called me the other day.
This was a low point.
In my relationship with him.
He's like, "Yeah, I'm a dad, but..."
"Ah!"
Shut up.
You'll never be the third most popular member of Come Town.
Shut up.
My dad called me the other day.
Excited.
On the phone.
He's like, Adam!
I was like, "What?"
He's like, "Uh, um, Kamal is Brett."
He's like, "Dad, are you fucking gay?"
Because you sound kind of like a gay guy right now.
What does Kamal is, what does it mean?
People are saying it about the election.
That's a thought you can have on the presidential election.
It's your guy's fault.
You made it up.
What does it mean?
What does it mean, sir?
You.
What does that mean?
No clue.
I don't fucking know either.
What about a lady?
All the three of you.
You, ma'am.
You have no idea.
What does it mean?
You.
Yes, yes, bitch.
Sorry, I'm sorry.
It's funny to say.
It's so wrong.
Can I go to jail for that?
Can I go to jail for that?
Can I go to jail for that?
Can I go to jail for that?
He's in the zone.
We've definitely had a comic more in the zone.
And that's the point.
How are you feeling, Freeland?
Just doing my pre-show.
Just took a quick number three.
Yeah.
Go out there and get them wet.
That's what Shecky Green said to me once.
You know what funny is for a podcast if you have just comedians just talking to
each other?
Like all the time.
What does it mean?
Care-free summer.
What?
Are you from America?
Wait.
You're saying Kamala Harris is having a carefree summer?
That's why we have to vote for her?
Wait.
Why don't you tell me what brat is?
Ketemy.
Ketemy.
That's what it is.
They're such assholes.
They're like, you can't get healthcare, but it's gay.
I mean it is for me the first time that I have felt represented though in a
major political campaign.
It is true.
It is like a very Wakanda kind of style.
For me.
Kamala Harris.
But it's not because of her.
I don't care about her.
It's because she's married to a guy.
And if she wins, he gets to just live at the White House and do nothing.
Which is the first time I've ever felt represented in any capacity in politics
ever.
He gets to just live in a fucking sick house like the movie Blank Check.
While everyone's calling his wife a bitch, right?
But he doesn't have to do anything.
He'd be like, babe, how's your day?
You know?
She'd be like, oh, I don't know.
I went to the border.
Everyone's saying I'm a bitch.
He'd be like, oh.
You know this place has a movie theater?
I got Borat on 35 movies.
I don't know.
I don't know how...
Why are you interested in my life?
Why is it always about you?
What was I talking about?
Israel or some shit?
Israel's a toughie.
It is a toughie.
It's a little bit of a Woody Allen situation.
I know.
It is.
Because people bring it up to me like, I did it.
And I have to be like, I didn't even know.
Is that right?
I hadn't heard.
I hadn't heard.
What's going on over there?
Oh, okay.
Loose to me.
Except you can't.
You don't have the out that you have with Woody.
It's tougher for me.
The Israel thing.
Than the Woody.
It's a stupid thing to say.
Someone can't be like, oh, what about the Gaza?
You can't be like, look.
You gotta separate the art from the art.
Because you can't do that with the country Israel.
Because I don't know.
I'll let you guys in on a little secret.
They've never made a good art.
Do you know that?
Like, Adam, have you heard imagined dragons?
No, they have to kill the palestinians.
And later imagine dragons.
No, I'm just imagining a guy, an IDL guy, just listening to Radio Act.
Last time Israel was over there doing they thing in Gaza.
I believe in service, they were wilding out in Gaza.
I don't know if you guys get the New York news over here in England, but we had
a series of punchings.
People were like, what's so funny about that?
Ha!
They were bludgeoning Jews.
Ha!
Ha!
Ha!
They bludgeoned Jews.
Yeah, they did, okay?
Guys were watching on TV.
They didn't like what Bibi was up to.
They were like, I don't take too kindly to this.
Why are you still laughing?
You're still laughing.
You're a turtleneck.
Dude, this guy's a poshy dude.
I can tell.
Fuck the poshies.
Just look at his turtleneck.
Ha!
I'm worried about the punchings.
I don't know if you can tell from what I've been wearing, but...
Should be pretty obvious to you guys.
I have been doing more of a Puerto Rican thing.
I have been.
Hiding and playing sight!
No one can tell the difference.
Going up to Puerto Rican fellas been like, listen, fucking...
Oye como vale?
What's up, brother?
Uh, listen, brother.
I'm fucking Puerto Rican.
You're Puerto Rican.
I don't have to tell you twice.
Um...
One thing about all us Puerto Rican fellas is we cannot get enough of this
goddamn Lean Manjuel Miranda.
We can't get enough of this.
Best rapper!
Best rapper according to all us Puerto Ricans.
And going up to Puerto Rican fellas, you guys don't know what the fuck I'm
talking about, but...
I'll finish this bit that makes no sense.
Going up to Puerto Rican fellas, mildly racist bit too.
Um...
Like, listen, fucking K-Lo K-Poppy.
Like...
Listen, I'm fucking Puerto Rican.
You're Puerto Rican.
And one thing...
And I don't know about you fellas, but I am...
Despacito for...
For a little bit of pussy.
I wanna cheat on my novia.
I wanna cheat on...
On mi esposa so bad.
And start un segundo familia...
That lives three blocks away from my regular familia.
Where are you going, take a shit?
That's right, baby.
Do you guys have, uh...
All gender bathrooms here in England?
Yeah.
You guys ever walk in on a girl...
Take a shit?
That's right, baby.
Do you guys have, uh...
All gender bathrooms here in England?
Yeah.
You guys ever walk in on a girl...
Taking a shit in an all gender?
Accidentally?
She didn't fl...
She didn't block it?
And you...
I don't know if it's just me, but do you guys ever make eye contact with her
and say,
"I count...
I count this as sex?"
Is that just me?
I count this as sex.
See, tell me, how did you come up with your process?
My process?
Yeah.
Hmm...
I just copied whatever the black comics that I looked up to growing up.
Yeah.
You remind me a lot of them.
That the audience...
What is it?
That they're naked.
Picture that they're naked.
Picture that you're naked.
Picture that you're naked.
And they're spent decades.
And they're fully clothed.
Yeah.
And they were like, "Why?
What is this?
What is this, theater in the 1970s?"
There are a lot of girlfriends right now that look disappointed.
You hear it?
Why did you take her?
You took your bitch through this?
Why would you take your bitch through this?
You're going to take her to a mini golf?
Of course.
It says you bring her to a men's rights rally?
What was I saying?
I don't know.
In America, how are the girls doing here?
In America, we got rid of abortions for the girls.
It's pretty mean.
Are the girls okay here?
You're from America, ma'am?
What are you gonna...
What do the girls have planned on that one, huh?
What do the girls got cooking on that one, huh?
Why don't the girls...
What's that?
Brat summary?
Thank you.
Thank you.

Adam Friedland: Two Nights In London | Comedy Special EP

Freedom's really in the zone right now. He's so focused, he's so passionate and
driven for his
audience. He thinks about his crowd, he thinks about his audience, thinks about
comedy. I've
never seen anything, I've never experienced anything like it really. That's why
he's one of the greats.
"Are you guys ready for what you came for? Are you guys ready to see Adam Friedland?"
"Remember, before you go out there, remember what your mother said to you
before she died. You are a terrible comedian!"
"In the inverse words!"
"Adam Friedland!"
"Remember!"
I'm trying to take the earth, I'm trying to take the earth.
I'm trying to take the earth, I'm trying to take the earth, I'm trying to die,
I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm
trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm
trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm
trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm
trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm
trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm
trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm trying to die, I'm
trying to die, I'm trying to die
I'm trying to take the earth, I'm trying to take the earth, I'm trying to take
the earth,
I'm trying to take the earth, I'm trying to take the earth, I'm trying to take
the earth, I'm trying to take the earth.
Israel has a right to defend itself.
This is what it's all about, London, where are we?
Shepherds Bush.
That's something, dude, that's something right there, Shepherds Bush.
It's always good when you're coming up and you're set three minutes before you
go.
Always nice.
What's going on, David?
Hold on, I'm not really paying much attention.
They might go to war with Iran?
What, are they going to fight over Cologne?
Ah, man.
They can't be good, right?
Over there?
I remember after October 7th, I said, that was the first thing I said, I said,
"Can't be good."
Can't be good for them, obviously, over there, but for, for me.
I don't know if you guys know who I am, I am one of the most cyber-bullied Jews
on earth.
Are you guys considering anti-Semitism of a lot of people?
Because I see a lot of the cogs turning in your heads.
I see a lot of you guys starting to ask the right questions.
What are you planning?
I think they're going to take our banks.
You're going to take our banks?
Take the banks.
I wasn't using the banks.
Take the weather machines, I don't know.
I wasn't using the weather machines.
What else?
We gave you the island already.
We gave you a good island, a Jewish island, and the...
Little St. James Island.
Just don't take Hollywood, please.
Why aren't you laughing now?
What, are you going to take Hollywood?
Come on.
Who are we going to give Hollywood to?
What, are we going to give the Chinese guys?
Come on.
Come on.
What the hell kind of movies are they going to make?
Oh, going to work one.
Going to work two.
Come on.
Come on.
Leave it to us.
Jewish pedophiles.
Leave it to us.
Come on.
Leave it to...
Nonsense.
Leave it to Jewish.
Nonsense.
Why do you guys use that word?
It's such a nice word for such a terrible thing.
Oh, I nonced him.
You guys built an empire on that.
On noncing.
You did.
You went around the world noncing.
Then you control the entire planet.
You people.
Look at you.
It's disgusting.
I mean, it's hilarious.
That you people.
Some of the most pathetic people I've ever looked at.
You got good at boats.
And then you got off the boat and you're like, yeah, we're here to nonce.
And then you wrote love poetry about a beautiful Ottoman boy or something.
This guy's like...
You're so funny about that, huh?
It's funny.
You guys molested people all over the world.
It's funny.
And you had to give it up.
And you had to come back here to this shitty place.
And be like, oh, that was weird.
That was weird.
It was funny.
The way you guys said goodbye to the ruling the world.
You'd lower a flag.
You'd have like a soldier lowering a flag.
And then you'd like kiss the Moogle boy lover.
Goodbye.
And then you'd wave.
You'd say bye.
It's time to nonce yourselves.
Now you can molest yourselves.
That's how you lost your empire.
We're losing an empire in my country right now.
I think what we had was the Biden-Trump debate.
We had, if you close your eyes, something that sounded like two tramps just
warming their hands.
By a barrel.
With a fire in it.
That was great.
That's better than you pedophiles.
We just got two guys waiting for a bus.
I miss Biden.
You guys remember this guy?
I miss him.
They took him away from us.
The election was really sad.
We were watching a man die.
We were watching a man die on TV.
We all had to sit there watching it like, "Oh my God, is he dead yet?"
And then they took him away the second he did one funny thing.
He did the first funny thing.
I was like, "Finally!
One funny part!"
And he was like, "Ladies."
When he called Zelensky, he was like, "Ladies and gentlemen, President Putin."
And the second he did that, the Jewish media had to take him away.
And he had to come home and now it's not funny anymore.
People are losing their minds about the fucking election right now in America.
I don't know.
Do you guys care?
None?
No.
No.
I don't like it.
I have a girlfriend.
I don't care.
I get pussy.
Why would I care?
People are losing their minds.
The parents.
The parents are not taking it well right now.
My dad called me on the phone the other day.
I, I'm like, "You can go to jail for, like, Instagram here, okay?"
I'm like, scared.
You know how free speech?
Shocking performance, Adam Friedman.
In the dodgy bit of Shepherd's Bush.
My dad called me the other day.
This was a low point.
In my relationship with him.
He's like, "Yeah, I'm a dad, but..."
"Ah!"
Shut up.
You'll never be the third most popular member of Come Town.
Shut up.
My dad called me the other day.
Excited.
On the phone.
He's like, Adam!
I was like, "What?"
He's like, "Uh, um, Kamal is Brett."
He's like, "Dad, are you fucking gay?"
Because you sound kind of like a gay guy right now.
What does Kamal is, what does it mean?
People are saying it about the election.
That's a thought you can have on the presidential election.
It's your guy's fault.
You made it up.
What does it mean?
What does it mean, sir?
You.
What does that mean?
No clue.
I don't fucking know either.
What about a lady?
All the three of you.
You, ma'am.
You have no idea.
What does it mean?
You.
Yes, yes, bitch.
Sorry, I'm sorry.
It's funny to say.
It's so wrong.
Can I go to jail for that?
Can I go to jail for that?
Can I go to jail for that?
Can I go to jail for that?
He's in the zone.
We've definitely had a comic more in the zone.
And that's the point.
How are you feeling, Freeland?
Just doing my pre-show.
Just took a quick number three.
Yeah.
Go out there and get them wet.
That's what Shecky Green said to me once.
You know what funny is for a podcast if you have just comedians just talking to
each other?
Like all the time.
What does it mean?
Care-free summer.
What?
Are you from America?
Wait.
You're saying Kamala Harris is having a carefree summer?
That's why we have to vote for her?
Wait.
Why don't you tell me what brat is?
Ketemy.
Ketemy.
That's what it is.
They're such assholes.
They're like, you can't get healthcare, but it's gay.
I mean it is for me the first time that I have felt represented though in a
major political campaign.
It is true.
It is like a very Wakanda kind of style.
For me.
Kamala Harris.
But it's not because of her.
I don't care about her.
It's because she's married to a guy.
And if she wins, he gets to just live at the White House and do nothing.
Which is the first time I've ever felt represented in any capacity in politics
ever.
He gets to just live in a fucking sick house like the movie Blank Check.
While everyone's calling his wife a bitch, right?
But he doesn't have to do anything.
He'd be like, babe, how's your day?
You know?
She'd be like, oh, I don't know.
I went to the border.
Everyone's saying I'm a bitch.
He'd be like, oh.
You know this place has a movie theater?
I got Borat on 35 movies.
I don't know.
I don't know how...
Why are you interested in my life?
Why is it always about you?
What was I talking about?
Israel or some shit?
Israel's a toughie.
It is a toughie.
It's a little bit of a Woody Allen situation.
I know.
It is.
Because people bring it up to me like, I did it.
And I have to be like, I didn't even know.
Is that right?
I hadn't heard.
I hadn't heard.
What's going on over there?
Oh, okay.
Loose to me.
Except you can't.
You don't have the out that you have with Woody.
It's tougher for me.
The Israel thing.
Than the Woody.
It's a stupid thing to say.
Someone can't be like, oh, what about the Gaza?
You can't be like, look.
You gotta separate the art from the art.
Because you can't do that with the country Israel.
Because I don't know.
I'll let you guys in on a little secret.
They've never made a good art.
Do you know that?
Like, Adam, have you heard imagined dragons?
No, they have to kill the palestinians.
And later imagine dragons.
No, I'm just imagining a guy, an IDL guy, just listening to Radio Act.
Last time Israel was over there doing they thing in Gaza.
I believe in service, they were wilding out in Gaza.
I don't know if you guys get the New York news over here in England, but we had
a series of punchings.
People were like, what's so funny about that?
Ha!
They were bludgeoning Jews.
Ha!
Ha!
Ha!
They bludgeoned Jews.
Yeah, they did, okay?
Guys were watching on TV.
They didn't like what Bibi was up to.
They were like, I don't take too kindly to this.
Why are you still laughing?
You're still laughing.
You're a turtleneck.
Dude, this guy's a poshy dude.
I can tell.
Fuck the poshies.
Just look at his turtleneck.
Ha!
I'm worried about the punchings.
I don't know if you can tell from what I've been wearing, but...
Should be pretty obvious to you guys.
I have been doing more of a Puerto Rican thing.
I have been.
Hiding and playing sight!
No one can tell the difference.
Going up to Puerto Rican fellas been like, listen, fucking...
Oye como vale?
What's up, brother?
Uh, listen, brother.
I'm fucking Puerto Rican.
You're Puerto Rican.
I don't have to tell you twice.
Um...
One thing about all us Puerto Rican fellas is we cannot get enough of this
goddamn Lean Manjuel Miranda.
We can't get enough of this.
Best rapper!
Best rapper according to all us Puerto Ricans.
And going up to Puerto Rican fellas, you guys don't know what the fuck I'm
talking about, but...
I'll finish this bit that makes no sense.
Going up to Puerto Rican fellas, mildly racist bit too.
Um...
Like, listen, fucking K-Lo K-Poppy.
Like...
Listen, I'm fucking Puerto Rican.
You're Puerto Rican.
And one thing...
And I don't know about you fellas, but I am...
Despacito for...
For a little bit of pussy.
I wanna cheat on my novia.
I wanna cheat on...
On mi esposa so bad.
And start un segundo familia...
That lives three blocks away from my regular familia.
Where are you going, take a shit?
That's right, baby.
Do you guys have, uh...
All gender bathrooms here in England?
Yeah.
You guys ever walk in on a girl...
Take a shit?
That's right, baby.
Do you guys have, uh...
All gender bathrooms here in England?
Yeah.
You guys ever walk in on a girl...
Taking a shit in an all gender?
Accidentally?
She didn't fl...
She didn't block it?
And you...
I don't know if it's just me, but do you guys ever make eye contact with her
and say,
"I count...
I count this as sex?"
Is that just me?
I count this as sex.
See, tell me, how did you come up with your process?
My process?
Yeah.
Hmm...
I just copied whatever the black comics that I looked up to growing up.
Yeah.
You remind me a lot of them.
That the audience...
What is it?
That they're naked.
Picture that they're naked.
Picture that you're naked.
Picture that you're naked.
And they're spent decades.
And they're fully clothed.
Yeah.
And they were like, "Why?
What is