Name: NYC Synagogue Tunnels & the Third Temple | The Adam Friedland Show
Uploaded: 2024-02-17T12:30:09.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'NYC Synagogue Tunnels & the Third Temple | The Adam Friedland Show' from TAFS Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-02-17. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'NYC Synagogue Tunnels & the Third Temple | The Adam Friedland Show' from TAFS Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-02-17. Transcript available.

So, Nick and I at Great Tea, I mean, do you have any additional information on
the tunnels
that you want to share?
I know the whole thing about the tunnels.
Did you call me about the tunnels?
Somebody called me about the tunnels.
I think I text you and I said that we need to protect our boys.
Well, I think now it's, yes, I think now it's pretty known.
But basically, there's this faction.
I don't know how interested your audience will be.
Don't give the boring answer.
Give a funny answer.
I'm giving the boring answer.
Oh, because he talks 16 minutes about his tooth.
So, I can't talk about this?
You were asking questions about this tooth.
Exactly.
I'm the guest.
I don't care.
Okay.
So, thank you.
I didn't bite you.
Okay.
So, thank you.
There's a faction in the...
Are you Jewish?
Yes.
Is he?
Of course.
I'm not Jewish.
Okay.
But anyway, there's different kinds.
You know there's different kinds of...
I know about...
Yes.
We know.
We've talked about the truth.
I understand what the tunnels are for.
They've already been told.
It was a...
Adam's explained it.
I explained it already on the show.
He's thrown it to you to give a joke answer.
It was a joke answer.
It was like at midnight.
But wait.
What did you tell him?
That these guys...
That the Rebbe had plans to expand 770.
Yeah.
That's not true.
You don't want to get permits.
That's not true.
That's not true.
What is it?
So give us the truth.
What is it is there's a faction when the Rebbe died, everybody, you know, mourned
him.
But there was a small faction of Lubavitch Jews who considered him the Messiah,
the Mashiach.
Myself included.
This faction grew a little bit, a little bit.
And they felt like this is his temple.
That's where he was the rabbi.
That's where he was, you know, the Alter Rebbe and all that.
And they wanted a bigger place for the idea of him being the Mashiach, the
Messiah.
So they were trying to, yeah, not expand what was already there, but make
almost a separate space under there.
And eventually maybe take over the rest of it.
I don't know about that.
But they were trying, they're, you know, there's now infighting a little bit.
Some who believe he was the Messiah and some who don't believe.
Most people don't believe, but the few people that believe were trying to make
more room for that.
Why would you believe that he was?
I know.
I know, because everything is still shit.
Yeah, exactly.
It's like, well, then fuck this.
I mean, stop.
Well, then you're a Christian.
No more religion here.
Yeah, like it didn't come.
Yeah, it didn't do anything.
Well, then it's coming back.
If Christ came back, if Christ, if there was a second coming of Christ, right?
And he's like, oh, here I am.
And he proves it.
He's the son of God.
And they're like, great.
So, like, can you fix anything?
He's like, nah, I can open a fucking CarMax franchise.
Right.
Yeah.
That's about it.
No, it is bizarre.
Well, wouldn't it be the third coming?
Because he died and then he came back four days later, no?
But the second coming of Christ is.
Yeah, the messianic age.
Or with, yeah, with the Antichrist.
What's the Antichrist?
The Antichrist is.
It's probably one of the two of us.
Yeah.
Have you had Shia LaBeouf on yet?
You know, he's a Catholic now.
I'd love to have him on.
You want to know about the Antichrist?
Yeah.
What is it?
Ask Nick.
Yeah, the Antichrist, all the Christian Zionists, they believe that there's
going to be, the third
temple will be built.
The Antichrist will put himself in the throne of God at the third temple.
So can't we get on with just building this temple?
That's what evangelicals want to do.
Well, that's what I've said.
Oh, so they have so much money.
They build all kinds of churches.
This is Nick's plan for peace in the Middle East.
So are they building it or what?
First of all, here's the thing.
Israel can go into Gaza and they can kill two million people.
They can do that and there will not be any kind of meaningful consequence.
The Arab world's not going to do anything about it.
Yeah, yeah.
There's not going to be any.
So the humanitarian solution is for Israel, likewise, to just blow up the Al-Aqsa
mosque
and build the third temple.
Right.
And they need a red cow.
They need a red cow.
A lot less people will die.
The Arab world will do nothing except get mad.
There might be like a little bit of terrorism, but nobody's going to die.
You build the third temple and then nothing happens and then we can stop.
But where's the third temple?
Because like people like Joel Olson or all this.
It's on the Mount.
Oh, it has to be somewhere specific.
It's on the Temple Mount.
Because I'm saying they're building huge churches now.
No, no, no.
There must be a temple that exists already.
You've got to build it.
You've got to build it.
It's the base of Migdash.
Okay.
You've got to build it where the first one's in.
Do we have a base of Migdash again?
No, they have to do it there.
Oh, it's the Jewish third temple?
Yeah.
The Jewish third temple and that's evangelicals are breeding the red heifer.
In Texas, they're breeding a red cow.
Yeah, that's what kind of drove it.
That's what cranked it to 11.
You need to make a sacrifice at the base of Migdash of a red cow.
Because it says in the Bible that...
I feel like they should have been able to do this already.
Well, Nick's saying they should try it.
They didn't have enough...
First of all, the cows didn't even exist in Israel until the 1980s.
But they can't sacrifice a different cow?
No.
It has to be a red heifer.
And it has to be...
You have to have a certain amount because you need that to purify all of the
Jewish diaspora.
You know what my whole thing is?
Listen, there's nothing I don't believe to a point of...
Like, if you told me there was an afterlife, I'd be like, sure, that's just as
plausible as us being here.
Do you believe Santa?
Like, whatever.
You said there's nothing you don't believe.
Look, it could happen.
I don't know.
Yeah, okay.
Santa could happen?
It could, I don't know.
This doesn't exist currently, but there could be a Santa.
I don't know.
I haven't seen anything.
But bottom line, I'm open to...
How about the Nightmare Before Christmas?
Do you believe that?
If there's Halloweenville, Halloween Town, and then Christmas...
Is it possible for Jackson to go to Christmas land and then become Santa?
If there's an afterlife, it's as possible as that we're here.
Okay.
My whole thing with organized religions and their narrative like this, they
need a red heifer cow or this and that, is like how specific.
Like, I could understand to a religious person, okay, yeah, maybe there's
something greater than us, whether it's a god, it's energy, it's whatever you
think.
I'm down.
But to say, like, there's such a specific narrative.
It's like, Mary married this and had a baby and then, you know, it's like, and
the son and the...
You know, it's just like, it's too specific.
The red heifer and this, it's like, it's too specific a narrative.
If you had something more general, I can understand that.
Well, it's the specificity that sort of bolsters the belief.
Yeah, it's a story.
It makes it into a story.
It's not because it's a story.
From the outside, you're like, yeah, they need a red cow.
I mean, it just seems absurd and crazy.
But if you're in the religion and the source of all of the red cow stuff and
all of that specificity is also saying,
over 75 years, these things will happen.
And they seem specific, but you could, like, vaguely apply that to different
times in history.
Then these people, that's their entire community.
It's like, okay, the state of Israel was created.
Like, there's a war from these outside nations and Israel wins despite all odds
and, like, all of these things.
It's, like, the specific.
Oh, so that was called sometime before and then all these things are happening?
That's why I think it's on the rise is because a lot of it, a lot of, and it
all comes from, like, Ezekiel and Revelation.
So these were, like, predictions that now we're seeing.
That are in the Bible.
Oh, okay.
So evangelicals in America see this and they think, these, this is, oh, it's
happening now.
Yeah, but at the bottom of it is just, like, a very basic, like, thing that's
true about human psychology is that your brain is designed to solve problems
and see connections and things.
And so, like, there's always, especially if you're already involved in the
religion, but you're going to look at something that says, like, oh, it says
all of these things are going to happen.
And you're going to try and make that true.
Right, exactly.
It's, like, it's, like, when you start looking, you know, it's, like, oh, I
always, you know, I have a lucky number.
I'm starting to see it all the time.
Well, you're more in tune to looking at it.
Yeah, right, right, right, right.
But they can't understand something so simple as that?
Well, that's what I'm saying.
It's, like, the, like, it'll, the idea will continue to persist, but the
humanitarian, secular answer is literally to just blow up that fucking mosque
and let, like, just build the third temple.
Well, wait, that mosque, can't that just be the third temple?
What is it now, the mosque?
No, no, it's a specific design for the temple.
Oh, really?
Okay.
But it's also, it's a mosque.
It's not.
It's a temple, though.
It's not a, yeah, but it's not.
It has to be a synagogue.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And it has to be where that mosque is.
But how long has that mosque been there?
Since, uh, 1300 years.
So it's been there forever.
Yeah.
So why would it also be there?
The second temple was destroyed in the early, like, right after the year zero.
Oh, and they built the mosque over that.
Like, the, what, yeah.
Did they build a mosque over that?
Hundreds of years later.
Okay.
It was, the, what was it, the Babylonians had destroyed the second temple?
You know what, I feel like Hashem, I feel like God would understand.
And if we built a third one, let's say you believe this.
I feel like God would understand.
Listen, but already a thing there.
We moved it over a couple of feet.
Yeah.
And we built it here.
Like, what kind of a God is not like, unless you get me my exact thing.
What is he like, King Tut?
No.
A God from 6,000 years ago.
Yeah.
The God from the Old Testament is like a, like a, like a messy bitch.