Name: Nick Mullen's Racey New Sketch Idea | The Adam Friedland Show
Uploaded: 2024-03-26T13:00:18.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Nick Mullen's Racey New Sketch Idea | The Adam Friedland Show' from TAFS Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-03-26. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Nick Mullen's Racey New Sketch Idea | The Adam Friedland Show' from TAFS Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-03-26. Transcript available.

You know, actually, Riley, I want to learn Arabic so I can learn the term, I'm
sorry.
Shukriya!
Thank you.
Oh, well, I need to learn sorry.
Asalaam.
I always imagine that the Tower of Babel, the language that everyone spoke, if
you just
look at the biblical names, the language that people spoke probably sounded
something
like a Delta Blues scat before the Tower was smashed.
Like, everybody was kind of going around just doing like a...
Yeah.
And who smashed that tower?
Was it Mohammed Atta?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Very, very cool, Adam.
You know what's funny?
I was on the plane on the way here.
Yeah.
And, like, I was thinking about a couple of things.
I was texting people about it.
There was an Indian guy, probably like a six-year-old Indian man, with his
shoes and socks completely
off.
Uh-huh.
Just trying to just cruise into the cockpit looking for the bathroom.
And I love guys where they're like, "Oh, no, you can't go in there.
That's like a crime."
Uh-huh.
And then they have to put him in the bathroom.
But just, just the way guys like that just make themselves, like, completely
comfortable
with his shoes off.
Uh-huh.
And, you know, I was like, actually, I don't want to say it on the show.
But, yeah, just like, texting about how it's like, it's like, you know, yeah, I'm
not going
to say it on the show.
Okay.
So fast forward to the end of 2024.
Okay.
I will say it.
I will say it on the show, right?
Because then I'm making fun of, like, I'm making jokes, right?
And then it's like, you know, they go to tackle him.
And then I explain, I'm like, no, he's Indian.
He's Indian.
He's not Muslim.
He's not Muslim or whatever.
And I'm making the jokes, like, jokes like that, saying terrorists and stuff on
my phone
with my friend, you know?
Yeah.
And I'm like, oh, well, I hope the people behind me can't see my phone, you
know?
Because then I also, in that conversation, I pitched a sketch where it's like,
it's 9/11,
right?
And, like, the hijackers have already taken over the plane, you know?
Yeah, yeah.
The hijackers have taken over the plane, and then some guy stands up.
He's like, he's like, this is bullshit.
This is our lives, and we're going to sit here and be cowards?
And then people are like, yeah.
Yeah, this guy's right.
And he's, like, whipping them up into a frenzy.
He's like, we're going to take things into our own hands.
We're not just going to sit here.
He's like, what, are we going to just sit here and let these fucking steal our
plane?
Whoa, yeah, whoa, yeah.
And then everybody, he kind of just looted, and everybody started just looking
out the window.
Everyone's like, this guy's a homophobe.
Well, this guy's a, no, he's a bigot.
He's a bigot.
He's a bigot, because he's calling 9/11.
So the moral of the story is that everyone dies because they didn't want to
help a bigot.
Right, yeah, that's the joke, I guess.
Yeah, yeah, that's pretty good.
What do you think about that, Ryan?
I think it's great that people are standing up to hate.
Yeah, yeah, I agree.
In the sketch.
Yeah.
Adam, don't no-sell my sketch idea.
I didn't no-sell it, dude.
I was like, dude, I was--
Oh, okay, so what's the premise here?
You know what the premise is.
Don't no-sell it.
I get it.
The premise is that it's complicated.
Life is complicated, you know?
Sometimes you think you're standing up to bigotry, and then you die in 9/11,
and then
the towers crumble.
Excuse me, but the correct response was ha-ha, not oh.
I was laughing.
Oh, yeah.
You can't see it because you're on speakerphone.
Anyways, okay.
Sorry, dude.
We've got some distance from the average.
Okay.
Anyways, I'm pitching this sketch idea, you know, about this guy that keeps
digging this hole
deeper.
And he's like, we're gonna let you fucking say it, boop, homo, you know.
And he thinks that they're also gay.
Yeah, okay.
Yeah, right, yeah.
I'm texting this stuff on, you know, and I'm like, oh, man, I hope the people
behind me
can't see what I'm texting.
Yeah, because you're seeing a lot of risque stuff.
Right, yeah, but imagine you're on a plane, and you see someone saying, like,
terrorism
and bomb and hijack.
And slurs.
Yeah.
Hold on.
You see terrorism and bombing and hijacking, and you get worried.
Okay, sorry.
And then you see the N-word and the F-slur, and you're like, oh, thank God.
They're a patriot.
You're like, oh, my God, thank God.
I was worried.
This guy wasn't an American.
This guy wasn't a proud American.
Oh, thank God.
He's a good old boy.
And that, Riley, is how you make the big bucks.
Yeah.
That's how we make the big bucks, dude.
The worst that's going to happen is he's going to get into a passive-aggressive
shit
with the flight attendant about putting his seatbelt on.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And think that, like, that COVID is still happening and that they want to give
him a vaccine.
Before the plane went down in Shanksville, the guy said, let's roll.
Yeah.
Let's roll is pimp.
Yeah.
Let's roll is really, yeah.
I was imagining, I was imagining too, right?
Like, because, you know, that Indian guy went to get up and I'm like, I wonder
if that word bothers anybody.
And then I thought about how sometimes, like, racism is good.
You know?
Because, like, I know, I can, I know what a guy is like Hindu.
I can tell the difference between a Sikh and a Hindu.
Yeah.
And that one's pretty easy.
But it's like, you know, so it's like, okay, you're sitting next to, like, an
old lady, right?
And she's, like, you know, nervous because she sees this Indian guy heading
towards the cockpit.
And then you explain to her, you're like, oh, actually, you see that bracelet.
That means that he isn't Muslim.
He's actually, you know, he's either Hindu or he's Sikh.
And they have actually been at war with the Mujahideen for a very long time.
That's actually the number one guy you want in the cockpit if Muslims were to
attack.
And she's like, oh, my God, thank you.
And then I see that the Indian guy is actually going to the bathroom.
And I'm like, no!
Stop it!
Stop him!
No!
Get down!
Everybody, get down!
That was pretty good, dude.
Yeah.
That was pretty good.
Yeah.
That was pretty good.