Name: The Baltimore Key Bridge Collapse | Kurt Metzger on The Adam Friedland Show
Uploaded: 2024-04-01T13:30:22.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Baltimore Key Bridge Collapse | Kurt Metzger on The Adam Friedland Show' from TAFS Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-04-01. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Baltimore Key Bridge Collapse | Kurt Metzger on The Adam Friedland Show' from TAFS Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-04-01. Transcript available.

I'm right now I'm I'm very excited about the I have to go to Baltimore after
that attack on the
bridge on the bridge yeah which um which I've resisted I resisted the urge your
bridge chunk
together for the shows no I just have a crazy conspiracy that I'd like to put
on your show
let's hear it let's hear it let's hear it um I think that it is uh you have a
girlfriend that
gets mad and I got an ex would break my shit yeah yeah you know like a revenge
kind of thing
yeah I haven't but I can imagine a breaker Keith Robinson calls him a breaker
but oh Keith has a
name for yeah yeah no that's a clever name too I'd rather be here because you
know that's those
money and uh for example my ex that was a breaker that's that's so funny when I
we called a woman
who breaks something he calls him a breaker he goes he's like oh you got a
breaker yeah it was just
a post-stroke thought that he so breakers by the way I remember my my one ex
there was a breaker and we're arguing about Kyle Rittenhouse because I knew he
was going to get
acquitted you know what Keith calls him a shooter a shooter I call him a
goddamn hero I knew he was
going to be acquitted okay because I did a little detective trick watching the
readily available
evidence of every part of the thing for hours but but because she's a breaker
it is very funny half the
reason people don't like it is because he's got a round fat face exactly that
you want to hit with a
skateboard imagine getting face imagine getting shot by like a peep basically
no
he looks like a woman he looks like a midwest woman you know dude that Chris
Kyle there you
could think one of those like you get your skateboards you could fix that face
and what but he's everyone
he shot I'm good for it he's better than cops but anyway my girlfriend not my
girl my ex because she
breaks shit she identified with like the pedophile burn shit down people more
because she didn't like
the idea that someone could be and by the way it's not why they got shot they
got shot because they
were trying to kill him but she's like but for property they get because she's
broken shit so she
identifies with them I go look I have no political feelings in this like I don't
believe in any of
the things they're real I'm just telling you watch the footage of it you could
see what happened she
goes I don't need to see the footage I go bitch what am I Galileo look in the
telescope you can see
reality in there yeah so she you think she broke the bridge your ex no I think
you know how we had to
get back with our first love our first wife Israel and our side piece Ukraine
uh-huh uh-huh good times
it was a Chinese ship and now look I don't mean to apply Occam's razor in a
situation where it could
just be racist but DEI did this I want to make that clear though it was a
Chinese guy driving the
ship I mean was it yeah wait is that true yeah you are you speculating or you
know because you've
solved it if it was a Chinese guy it was a Singapore-ish that's not man I
thought we'd
crack the case can you imagine a Chinese guy named Gilligan what trouble you
would have with it
the name and the steering yeah Gary again oh my
I'll see you next time.