Name: Would Nick Mullen go to Space? | The Adam Friedland Show
Uploaded: 2024-07-16T14:30:30.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Would Nick Mullen go to Space? | The Adam Friedland Show' from TAFS Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-07-16. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Would Nick Mullen go to Space? | The Adam Friedland Show' from TAFS Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-07-16. Transcript available.

we're trying to go back to the moon i guess next year yeah i was reading about
this for a while
so the artemis program the artemis program and you know what i don't consider
myself to be
actually prejudiced in any way i say things that are like you know rude jokes
or whatever but you
know it's i've always been like yeah i don't think i'm like prejudiced and
there's no like i've never
been bothered before about like you know the idea of a black president that
doesn't bother me the
idea of a black lady president doesn't bother me right but then i found out
with the artemis
program that they're sending a woman of color and a gay man to the moon
specifically it's like
they're casting survivor and that was the first time i was like uh no no you
know what i mean that's the
there should be one thing that white guys get to keep yeah and it's the moon it's
at least the moon
it's the moon it is white after all we were that's ours we were the only ones
that went there yep as
soon as like as soon as the civil rights movement started they said burn the
files yeah right you're
not we're never forget it we're not fucking you know verner von brun was a nazi
let's destroy all
of his work we're not going back to the moon no one's going to i mean there's
all the the whole
conspiracy theory that we never went to the moon and all that stuff and we can't
get through the
radiation belts and all that i'm not sure i buy any of that i mean i think we
went to the moon i think
nasa and the government is that is that the argument is that there's too much
radiation because the
radiation is yeah it's some sort of radiation belt that comes from our poles
and goes around
and that supposedly you're not if you send a human through that they would just
die immediately um but
i don't measure that level of that's what i'm saying it's something like you
know because the moon is a
it's a six to eight day trip right to go up there and that level of exposure it
is elevated it puts you
like i you know i think the number is like uh uh five to ten percent more risk
of cancer over your
lifetime sure it's not like you know being put in a microwave yeah but i think
like with mars i think
that's the problem is because it's a much longer exposure period yeah you're
there for a long time
and the whole muscle dystrophy and all this other stuff that you have with
being in space but
yeah i i just uh would you go to the moon if you had the option to absolutely
fucking not
no chance i don't know i think i don't think i'd want i won't even ride in
those you ever go in a
building and they have like the elevators where you have to like close the door
yeah that's my
building and yeah i'm like no i'm not using this you don't want to get strapped
into a rocket before
they figured out what the fucking elevator is supposed to be i'm not yeah doing
the machine's job
right right right you know yeah i don't know i i do think about that because
like i think about
like william shatner getting blasted into a rocket by blue origin just to like
barely even leave the
stratosphere and come back down i'm like yeah how much riskier is that than
just getting on a fucking
delta flight these days or is it like is it to the point where it will be
routine enough one day that
it will just be like going to the airport and you just get in a rocket and
launch yourself to japan or
go to a space station hotel for a month or something yeah probably but it's
yeah so but right
now it's like no it's way too crazy there's no way yeah i won't even get on
most roller coasters i
won't like fuck that and then i have to really ask myself if the rocket that's
got the black lady and
the gay man in it were to blow up right you know we're watching the i'm at a
bar everyone's we're
celebrating this wow we're finally putting a black lady and a gay man finally
the rocket blows up and
then i have to look around the bar being like oh no
what will my internal monologue be yeah it's much it's less hard-hitting than
the school teacher
that died on the the whatever fucking the challenger yeah didn't columbia also
blow up
yeah both the shuttles blew up yeah yeah we're we're pretty solid at blowing up
shuttles it'll be
interesting to see if we've gotten any better at it once we start doing this
artemis thing because
you would hope with artemis artemis is more privatized than the ones prior i
think the space
shuttle was that made by boeing or is that i think so or there was a lot of
involvement i think it was
one of those things like they were just trying to get every spacex is doing the
rockets for uh
the artemis program okay so yeah i mean yeah they're i mean if there's anybody
who's done enough trial
and error on their stuff it would be it would be them it is still it still
blows my mind that we can
watch i mean that we can just land rockets like it's nothing and that nobody
thought of trying that
for a long time we were just launching well that i think they had to develop
that specifically because
there's like less gravity on the moon so the lunar lander was like uh less of a
struggle than for
mars because mars doesn't mars has like pretty significant gravity yeah i mean
it's certainly
a lot more than the moon it's like maybe 75 percent of earth or something yeah
i don't know and that's
why when we landed those drones on there they just had like that big balloon
basically that they just
they just like throw it into a bouncy ball parachutes either because there's no
atmosphere right right
right yeah i mean what do you think do you think we end up living on mars in
like a couple hundred
years do you think that's even an option or is this like just crazy because it
just seems
kind of silly to me to be like we're gonna destroy this planet so let's go to a
destroyed planet
yeah it's like don't you think it'd be better to just let this one get
destroyed and fix this one
it'll probably be it's like looking at like a car that needs like a new
transmission yeah yeah and
looking at like a dodge dart that's been in the yard for a hundred years but we
should go to fix that
car in my mind it makes more sense to like well shouldn't we figure out how to
build underwater
cities first yeah if the world's gonna fly on ice antarctica right you know i
mean that yeah that that
and the fact that we can't do that it's like you know or sky cities like the
jets we can't have
anything that there's still a lot of consensus on like what kind of pants you
need to buy to go to
antarctica you know what i mean right yeah we seem very far from figuring it
out yeah yeah north face
is just lying to everybody yeah it's fucking up to minus 50 degrees and you'll
be fine and i watch
dudes on youtube they're like this is not working i'm freezing to death yeah
right um so i would go i mean
i would definitely live in an underwater city yeah i think that would be fun
but it's also just as
dangerous as i would have to be drunk the whole time oh yeah well why wouldn't
you be i would have to
be like something like i'm not gonna go down there and start doing science like
a weird homo that wears
like tuxedos all the time and i'm always trashed they do need that because if
it if it gets too formal
down there in those underwater bases people get a little uppity they'll be like
yeah we don't deal with
surface dwellers they do need one guy in a tuxedo who looks like he's lost from
his friends at a
bachelor party to like reel them in yeah back to reality yeah you're just
fishing out the window
little pencil mustache yeah yeah you're always touching people a little too
much would you live
on mars no i think it would be like i think i'd have to lose everything here i
would have to be like
in a john wick situation where they killed my dog and my family and i don't
know how to fight or
shoot guns well enough to like that might be john wick five john wick five he
goes there's still a
hotel with the guy at it and he sticks the coin he gets a fucking ray gun and
starts shooting aliens
yeah i think that would be probably the only situation i would end up in trying
to go to
another planet is like i need to do that revenge story and i don't have the
capacity to do it so then
i just leave and try something else