Name: The Nihilist President | Ari Shaffir on The Adam Friedland Show
Uploaded: 2024-08-06T14:00:25.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Nihilist President | Ari Shaffir on The Adam Friedland Show' from TAFS Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-08-06. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Nihilist President | Ari Shaffir on The Adam Friedland Show' from TAFS Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-08-06. Transcript available.

what i don't hear is any of them talking about the fucking opioid and fucking
homeless problem
there's nothing you can do about that great i would love to hear a president
say that by the
way you guys just so you know obviously i'm aware of the homeless there's
nothing you can do about
that so let's get on to fucking shit on the other side we could talk about the
opioid crisis when it
was our government making and selling the heroin yeah now that it's china it's
like all right well
there's nothing what do you want us to do go to war with china i'm sorry we got
everyone addicted
to heroin yeah and now the chinese have undercut us and we have no control over
it
that'd be a good answer yeah yeah yeah it would be funny if there was somebody
that tried to just run
on i didn't like just just being very deeply cynical yeah like it's like look
you're all just
gonna fucking die dude i mean oh nihilist oh yeah just a guy being like look
dictator president is not
a real job i have very limited power i understand there's a genocide going on
if i got into the office
and i tried to reduce arm sales they would kill me hey nihilist president what
can we do what can we do
about the economy right now nothing what you need to have we need a recession
unfortunately you're gonna
have to see a lot of people with their lives fucking ruined so that the people
that make all the money
can extract the capital out of this round and then we can restart the process
after you've lost your home
nihilist president the border what are we thinking about it uh we're just going
to ignore it oh we're
just going to ignore the border entirely nihilist president they're redoing all
the districts here's
the good news yeah if there is a terrorist attack because that's the big
concern it seems to be that
there's a lot of terrorists now crossing the border it's hezbollah's going to venezuela
and then because
of their their communist now there's communists that stole the violently stole
the election so now we
need to go in and change the results to somebody that just just coincidentally
is somebody we like
just coincidentally it happens to be somebody that we like and that's you know
that but now the
election being is we're we don't we're not even going to investigate whether it
was rigged or not
i'd love to just install somebody else i'd love to see nihilist president just
go guys bob dylan was
writing about this it's not going to change i promise you this if there is a
terrorist attack
it was us that did it so you don't have to worry about anything we'll be very
we'll be very sure that
we pick a target that is is not you know what honestly i'll just tell you the
plan right now
it's going to be against synagogues because because that makes the most sense
we need to drive home
the idea of rising anti-semitism and blame iran so if you're a regular american
you have nothing to
worry about we're going to be bombing synagogues and blaming it on some new
version of isis i've
seen anti-semitism right here do you have a cigarette no i don't that's what i'm
talking about
this anti-semitism i've done other podcasts with an iron semitic that do have a
cigarette
well i just don't i don't smoke no no i am like that triggered me i'm like two
days no vaping
well i don't know what i mean i don't know what i mean i don't know what i mean
i don't know