Name: Joe Rogan Experience #408 - Todd Glass
Uploaded: 2013-10-29T03:43:35.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #408 - Todd Glass' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2013-10-29. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #408 - Todd Glass' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2013-10-29. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #408 - Todd Glass

the joe rogan experience train by day joe rogan podcast by night all day
fuck it we'll just splicing commercials later todd glass there's there's no
reason to get all
crazy look at that oh there you go my headphones old school old school that's
not even old school
that's new school we were just talking about this t-shirt that i'm wearing
which is uh from cap
city comedy club in austin one of the great american comedy clubs like without
a doubt one of the top
three four clubs in the whole country you know we're talking about like places
that have you're
not hearing yourself a little hard oh it's too high too low oh you can too low
who was in here that
like oh beautiful that's so much work so hard yeah people always say like when
i do ufc broadcasts
like why are you fucking screaming all the time you scream on tv like if you're
there you can't
hear anything like people are so loud like there's nothing like one of those
environments it's so
fucking loud so when we're talking before the beginning of the show i have to
talk loud or i
can't even hear what the fuck i'm saying you can't even know you know it's hard
to imagine okay i know
that every i don't know what i'm talking about i got lost already already we're
too high we got too high
but uh what i wanted to talk to you about is i know that you had a hand in
designing one of the
other great comedy clubs in the country you had a hand in designing helium didn't
you i did and
and you know what i give him a lot of credit um what's so funny i just saw that
fake head oh this
the alien it's funny to turn to that yeah i can dope isn't it i can hold a
conversation that cat is
making me a um he's making me um another thing a zombie that guy's badass oh by
the way uh so i
should say if my opinion means anything because we talked about a little off
the air this is well i don't
want to insult the other podcasts it's not something they care about you know
let me look at it that way
but like this is the coolest studio i've ever seen like you took a lot of time
like creatively to make
this a cool space the brick wall the red curtains the black ceiling the lights
with the like stars in
them the lava lamps the rocks it's like why fucking not right yeah well i
wanted to do something that
would make me comfortable like if i don't like it yeah if you have an
opportunity i'm very childish
in what i like you know and uh like aliens and fucking bigfoot and a werewolf
in the front of the place
i'm very childish but i don't you know if i'm in an environment that's not like
me if i'm in a like a
clean sterile environment there'll always be like a little bit of hesitation
even if it's a fraction a little
something that keeps once it makes you want to keep it you know pc right or or
not be so honest or
whatever you know office environments i think ultimately or they're like hypnotize
people i think
just the idea that you're in an office all of a sudden everybody becomes
something that they're not
everybody puts on this bullshit attitude they all have this uh this this weird
way of behaving no one
swears no one talks about sex you know you're not even supposed to bring up
religion or politics
supposed to like everything's supposed to be like super fake when you're
dealing with customers
super flat no personality and really ultimately make it like super predictable
for the person you're
talking to like you're going to follow a very strict pattern of thinking and
behaving you're a gentleman
at business in doing business well uh yeah that's why even when i see managers
offices like i won't say
who but like you this is your way to express yourself creatively which people
then like if i walk into a
manager's office and he gets it creatively and i'm i don't know him that well i
go i give him some
points for that oh this guy gets it right this manager could have anything he
wanted it's not
like he it looked like hurts yeah and we used to behind his back go what this
is what he wanted like
this is like if you had to go fuck it look at me i work at hurts look at my
office he goes i want
that look anyway that story is available and story okay i did some people just
don't give a fuck though
right it's something that they don't put anything to analyze myself all i'm
worried about right now that
story was horrible i don't even remember what the story is that's where i'm at
i swear to god
i swear to god that's how much i get lost wow and now i'm going to just talk
about wherever i'm at
dude we got bookmarks for you do you don't worry you don't have to worry we'll
always refresh you
and let you know what we're talking about in every conversation we're ready we're
a good high person
we're so professional when it comes to being high thank you we're excellent at
it did you ask me a
question yeah we're talking about helium actually we're talking about you
having a say in the design
because somebody had told me like before i'd ever worked there it's like the
best club in the country
they were like this place is perfect it's like everything you want a club low
ceilings people
are packed in tight it's a great neighborhood it's a really cool neighborhood
there's a lot of other
bars and jazz clubs and like there's a lot of funky shit in that area yeah and
that club is just
perfectly set up and then they told me that you had a hand in designing it yeah
mark called me and he
uh through uh lewis lee or somebody from minneapolis and and they said you're
opening up a club and uh you
know um is that the guy from acme yeah he's the owner well back to backtrack a
little which i thought
was cool that mark even knew to do i go how did you know to call lewis lee he
also called him and
lewis basically taught him how to run a club well acme is another example i've
never worked at acme but
i was there recently i was hanging out with arch barker and he was working
there it's a fucking
amazing place it is it's perfect and all comedians like it so what mark did the
guy who opened up
helium i go how'd you know to pick him like how'd you know acme he goes oh i
went to a comedy festival
as a non-club owner just a guy who thinks he wants to open up a club and he
asked every comedian what
their favorite club was he goes he heard acme a lot he goes that sounds like a
guy i'd want to talk to
yeah i go that's so brilliant he goes it's just common sense i go yeah but it's
every most people don't have it it's like we were talking about cobs the other
day and i love cobs
cobs in san francisco i started at the old cobs which is a really tiny place
don't mention cobs to
me it was only like just kidding you know those people no matter what you're
talking about hey don't
mention is there anybody i can mention around you well then you have to ask
them why and then it
becomes about them that's really what it is those guys are annoying that's
exactly what it is
they turn it into something about them like it doesn't have to do with what you're
about to
say it has to do with their personal but it makes it look like it i fucking
told him that i counted
every seat in the room there's 180 seats you told me it's 170 seat room you're
stealing 10 seats
oh god those guys are the worst those guys are getting robbed everywhere they
go and i'm not
saying that people haven't been robbed before you're not legitimized it's when
it happens obviously
come on every story these people so many of them have so many stories it's like
um todd glass hasn't
been ripped off why have you been ripped off what the fuck is going on that you
keep getting ripped
off who you mentioned oh vinnie pam squats oh well there's certain guys show
for him there had to
be at least a thousand people there gives me a check 80 bucks fuck that shit
there's certain guys that
just have an animosity towards uh club owners there's a almost like a natural
animosity because of the
fact that like in the beginning they didn't want to have anything to do with
you you were like a rejected
girl you know that isn't mature yet you know you get real emotional about it
and very upset and then
when the guy comes around you're like where the fuck were you when i was 18 you
know people get
crazy right i think comedians get that way too when they in the beginning they're
fucking terrible so
nobody wants to use you you can't work anywhere and you have to slowly like
work your way into a
position where someone's actually willing to pay you to have their customers
hear you talk and that's a
really kind of a special relationship and the beginning part is so bad that we
develop this
weird sort of contentious relationship sometimes with club owners i think that's
like really ridiculous
you know i think you're right i think you're right like and again because i'm
overly paranoid
we're not saying that certain people haven't legitimately maybe been ripped off
sure but when that happens
that sucks what we're saying like a lot of that animosity comes from exactly
what you just said it's like
maybe you were bad then me you know maybe this maybe that maybe you know but
they're not all bad people
there's a lot of good ones
it took me a while to get the respect of the people that i came up with in boston
like the clubs in boston
i was headlining on the road before i was headlining back in boston again
because they saw me when i was terrible
it was like you know i should i should have been allowed to go on stage so when
when you've seen someone just
fucking stink it up hardcore for like you know a year or two in the beginning
of their career
it's just it just makes sense that you wouldn't want you know like five years
later you're like see man i'm not buying it
this guy's got to be still terrible you know i saw him when he was an open miker
and every comedian sort of says that you have to like leave your town
and get success elsewhere and then they respect it and recognize it but
if they see you when you suck in their mind
you suck
like p it's really hard for people to adapt it works that way with athletics
too
with fighting it works that way there's guys that believe that this guy can't
beat them
there's no way that guy can beat me mom the guy just beat you
like it's craziness it's a crazy way of thinking but they know back when the
guy sucked
and they refuse to admit that people can figure things out that people can
improve
yeah i i i even uh have that happen but i try not to like i'll think i'll think
of somebody the
way i thought about them you know somebody there's a comedian wanted to oh do a
middle in philadelphia
and i and i really think well you're probably i go wait i haven't seen him in a
while and then i take
the time i'm like oh my god i just got stuck in this mindset but at least i got
out of it
i love the comedian that it's about don't fucking find it if it's not you
you know it's you but don't be so sure he might okay he know it's you but don't
be so sure
yeah there's somebody going that has to be me i'm from philly i work with todd
in philly
wasn't he just say my name give me a plug people are too damn sensitive about
uh people's assessments
of them as long as those assessments are polite you shouldn't take it so
fucking personally
you can learn from those things yeah i had a comedian once you know what i'm
glad that i just
luckily wasn't stupid because he goes i could have easily been offended but
earlier in my career he
goes we hung out during the day and then he goes he said this affectionately i
remember it i was like
23 maybe 24 he goes he goes you're funny hanging out he goes what are you doing
up there on stage
you know and i was like i knew he was fucking right and he knew i could handle
it you know he said something
he goes that's what you want to be doing but i but i remember thinking i could
have either been like
fuck that guy that's my story you know what my story could have been then this
fucking idiot
tells me i'm funny off stage but i'm not fuck you i was doing better than you
every night
when she might have been because he was bad but whatever he was honest