Name: Joe Rogan Experience #476 - Honey Honey
Uploaded: 2014-03-27T23:29:33.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #476 - Honey Honey' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2014-03-27. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #476 - Honey Honey' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2014-03-27. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #476 - Honey Honey

What are you missing out of your life, folks?
What are you missing out of your life?
You're missing Lumosity.com.
Get your fucking brain in order.
Stop playing Angry Birds, or keep playing Angry Birds,
but essentially know that you're wasting your time,
whereas you could be playing games that are actually good for your dome.
That's what Lumosity is.
Lumosity is problem-solving games that are scientifically designed
and based on your needs.
If you go to Lumosity.com, they give you a bunch of different options to fill
out.
You click the Get Started Now button.
You enter in your information, and then you start asking it,
or it starts asking you what specific things you want to work on.
Do you want to work on memory?
Do you want to work on all sorts of different...
It's trying to get me to sign in here.
I don't know why it's trying to do that.
Lumosity.com forward slash Joe.
Why is it doing something weird here that it didn't do before?
Anyway, scientifically designed to challenge your brain and do it like a game.
So it makes it fun.
I enjoy playing the games.
It only takes a few minutes a day,
and over time you can actually track your progress online
and compare yourself to others if you're one of those motherfuckers.
That is to compare yourself to others.
There was this one guy, I remember this documentary,
about one of the smartest men in the world,
and he worked as a bouncer in a bar in Long Island.
And I'm like, no, you're not.
You're not because you work as a bouncer in a bar in Long Island.
You're just not the fucking smartest guy in the world.
And he was this guy who was rambling on and on.
He was super verbose and using a lot of big words
and going on about, you know,
he's the first guy ever that's come the closest to ultimate meaning.
Do you remember that guy?
No.
Big fat-faced dummy.
I thought he was very, very convinced.
Why?
Because he got a good number on a Mensa test.
You know, so he's good at figuring out how to count up numbers.
Socially, he's a mess.
Unable to see how goofy he sounds,
saying he's the smartest man in the world.
No self-deprecating skills.
Thinks he's a badass because he's a bouncer at a bar in Long Island.
And think it's like some sort of a Runyon-esque character.
You know, just a rebel.
He's a bouncer, but he's the smartest man in the world.
No, you're not.
If you were the smartest man in the world,
you would realize being a bouncer at a fucking bar in Long Island
sucks a fat dick.
And you'd get a better job.
Dummy!
That job's dumb.
Not that, you know.
I guess I'm going to quit my job as a bouncer now.
I was a security guard at one point in time.
I'm not above.
I'm not above.
Don't get me wrong.
But you can't claim smartest guy in the world,
and that's where you found yourself, at 40.
So shut your hole.
And go to Lumosity.
Go to lumosity.com slash joe.
That's lumosity.com slash joe.
Click the start training button,
and then start playing your very first game.
Lumosity.com slash joe.
It's very interesting.
It's a fun way to do things that, you know,
ordinarily would feel just like games.
But these games actually are scientifically designed
through something called neuroplasticity,
which I'm too stupid to understand.
You can even play them from your iPhone, iPad,
with a free Lumosity app.
So lumosity.com forward slash joe.
Go check it out.
Freaks!
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Get on it, you dirty freaks.
Honey, honey is here.
Why fuck around?
Young Brian, cue the music.
Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out.
The Joe Rogan Experience.
Train by day,
Joe Rogan Podcast by night.
All day.
What, you dirty freaks?
Listen, we had an issue.
We had a little sound issue.
We wanted to make sure that everything was clean and smooth,
since you guys are here.
And this is,
sound is a very important part of what you do.
Oh, yeah.
I don't have to tell you this.
It is a key to your lifestyle.
So, hey, what's up, fuckers?
What are you doing?
You know, we're chilling.
We're so excited to be in California.
Yeah, what happened?
Nashville lost its charm?
Well, it was snowing when we left,
let's put it that way.
Was it really?
Yeah, it was snowing,
and it's really interesting,
because the whole city really shuts down.
Like, schools close,
and I'm talking like a mild dusting.
Just like...
They just don't know what to do with it?
No, no.
Well, it's like rain out here.
Right.
If it rains here, people freak out.
Well, worse, though, right?
The freak out, you mean?
Like, Joey, yeah, Joey...
Was it Tom Segura Joey was with?
I forget who he was with in Oregon.
They were up in Oregon doing shows,
and a freak snowstorm blanketed the city,
and then it got icy rain below it.
Yeah, well...
So, it was snow on top of icy rain.
It was just the whole city just shut down.
I mean, if they don't have the, you know,
the salt trucks and all that stuff,
and if people don't know how to drive it,
they really shouldn't, you know?
But it's really interesting.
I mean, they closed school for, like, three days,
and, you know, the roads were really fine.
Right.
It was just, it was amazing.
What do you guys think about Nashville?
Has the charm worn off?
Are you bored with it already?
Man, well, we just talked,
and we came back the other night.
We got into L.A. yesterday,
and walked into this bar,
and all these people that I knew were there,
and all these friends,
and it just felt good, man.
And there's friends.
There's really...
Nashville's interesting,
because when you first get there,
it's such an open community,
and people welcome you in,
and everyone's sweet,
and you have friends,
and all of a sudden,
you go out to a bar,
and you know people.
But there's a difference
when you see people you've been with
for eight years, ten years.
It just feels good.
Right, right.
So coming back, I don't know.
It's so goddamn beautiful.
I got kind of wistful.
Do you guys...
Do you miss, like,
the largeness of the city,
or is it the people,
the attitude?
Like, did you feel different?
Like, a different vibe?
I've never lived in Nashville.
Yeah.
But did you get, like,
a different vibe from the people?
Yeah, I mean, the day...
Well, first of all, I mean,
you can drive around the whole city
in, like, 15 minutes.
I mean, it's just you're...
The days feel longer
because you're not stuck in your car
trying to get here to there
like you do in L.A.
It doesn't...
You know what I mean?
It's...
You just sort of, like...
Everything is really accessible,
which is great
because as far as our productivity
and working on the record,
which is kind of why we went there,
to write and have all this space,
which we're still not done.
We didn't do it there.
We keep coming back here to work on it.
Yeah.
But, you know...
It's true.
So it's really interesting, like, how...
You know, there's a number of reasons why.
You know, it's a much more affordable town
and all that stuff.
But when you...
When I come to California now,
I really feel, like,
like this intense energy.
Like, you're, like, vibrating.
It's so exciting.
And I just...
You know, you kind of feel like...
It's like this shock of...
You're just awake
and there's all this stuff happening.
There's so many...
So many fucking people.
And Nashville's great.
It's just, like, really chill.
Is that good?
Sometimes.
Sometimes.
But when you have it for a long time,
you kind of get a little stir-crazy.
Hmm.
It just doesn't have the diversity.
Look at my crazy eyes.
Yeah, yeah.
The diversity.
What can I do next?
The diversity?
Well, there's not...
Here, it's a completely different game
in terms of that.
There's this really interesting smush going on
of, like, Bible Belt,
conservatism,
and freaky people.
You know, there's kind of
the freaky people area.
But that's spreading.
Freaky people are spreading.
We're weirdos.
Yeah.
Weirdos always win.
We always win.
It's more fun to be a weirdo.
It's true.
That Bible Belt shit.
Once you catch a few of them
fucking kids,
you know,
and doing weird shit,
we're supposed to be all
highfalutin'.
Yeah, it's kind of game over there.
Yeah, it's game over.
They start losing credibility.
Mm-hmm.
You know?
I definitely feel a little more
self-aware in Nashville
as far as, like,
my, you know,
my fucking potty mouth
and my, you know,
just being...
Loud and obnoxious.
Loud and, you know,
because there's a lot more...
I feel like there's a lot...
No, I am.
I'm pretty obnoxious.
I mean, you know,
we all just get that way
when we get liquored up.
You picked it up.
But I think people
are a little more reserved there.
Of course, yeah.
You know?
I generally really enjoy
playing there.
I think it's one of my
favorite places to play.
I love the people there.
I love the small town
thing about it, too.
I just think people
are super friendly there.
But I wonder if I would
go crazy if I lived there.
The Bible Belt thing
would probably drive me crazy.
But you can avoid it.
Yeah.
And honestly,
it seems fairly segregated.
It's like you just
don't walk down that street.
That's hilarious.
Yeah, it's pretty amazing.
That street, people
believe in dinosaurs.
This street, not so much.
Oh, really?
Somebody tweeted me
something with some woman,
you know,
that was talking about
that dinosaurs
must have probably drowned
and she wasn't trolling.
That Noah didn't have room
for them on the ark,
so they probably all drowned.
They would have eaten him.
It was on her Facebook page
and someone sent me a tweet.
Can you believe the silly bitch?
And it was to her Facebook page
because it was so ridiculous
that random people
that didn't even know her
were going to her Facebook page
and be like,
bitch, are you fucking crazy?
Dinosaurs drowned.
It's fucking Russell Crowe's fault.
He decided to do this
goddamn Noah movie
and the whole thing
gets stirred up again.
Russell Crowe?
I haven't seen anything about that.
He's Noah.
It's a Darren Arfonsky,