Name: Joe Rogan Experience #774 - Brendan Schaub & Bryan Callen
Uploaded: 2016-03-16T02:20:37.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #774 - Brendan Schaub & Bryan Callen' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2016-03-16. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #774 - Brendan Schaub & Bryan Callen' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2016-03-16. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #774 - Brendan Schaub & Bryan Callen

She hot though like a bag of water
Boys yeah, first of all that is a beautiful tell the t-shirt you were in there
Mr.. It's got you the newest version of the master Kim not out yet shirt accentuates
his tits. That's a fucking dope tiger man
It's like sort of a half dragony tiger thing going on very Asian with the Asian
T fat K. Yeah, man
Who's doing your artwork? I had a couple of guys this one. I collabed with a
guy his names on Instagram painted demons
And so the two guys I use they're both from tap out back in the tap out tap out
days
Justin and this guy painted demons jettison. We just get together the sun the
world of t-shirts. I love it
The tap out thing is so strange. It's like they it's like there's a few
companies like that, right? Like Von Dutch
Remember Von Dutch yeah, yeah, and then Von Dutch that became Ed Hardy. Yeah
The people that would have worn van Dutch if they had been five years younger
we're now wearing Ed Hardy. They call it Edward Tarty
I don't know why
Legit tattoo artist super legit. Yeah, I mean he has he's like a famous tattoo.
I think he's dead
Is he dead? Well, the kind of guys that wear
Like they're usually easy. I used to wear some Ed Hardy
But they're usually super muscular guys shave their forearms. They got the skin
like a hot dog to do to use your term
You're talking Jersey Shore. Yeah, here's the deal
I mean we can demonize those guys all day long and we do and it's funny, but
they're just trying to get laid
The only reason why we don't we wouldn't wear those things if we're all going
exactly
Peacock and you don't wear rhinestones cuz you're looking to fuck your body
dude
They've done studies that when a man wears jewelry Don Ed Hardy born in 1945.
He's still alive. That's your sweet ass
He's alive. Wow. He looks a lot younger there. No, that's not him. I'm kidding.
I'm kidding
That's a different guy with a shitty shirt. He's known for those sailor tattoos.
Yeah, original sailor tattoos
Yeah, he was like one of the the great Americana tattoo artists
He would make those really cool like like his his stuff was not realistic
looking at all. It's like cartoonish. There he is
Powerful. He looks like he looks awesome. He made a bank. He looks like a
closet. Yeah
What it's just weird that a tattoo artist like I knew him from the tattoo
magazines
Yeah, because before I ever got a tattoo I was like really into tattoos
I'd buy the magazines and check out all the the really cool artworks like Paul
Booth
You ever see that guy? Yeah, I'm down in New Jersey. Yep. God damn that guy
that guy
He won't let you tell him what to draw. Really? Yep. Yeah, really? Yeah, you
just gotta trust him. Yep
Well, he's got a style and his style is like demonic white eyeballs black and
gray really cool super detailed
Amazing tattoos. Here's look at this fucking guy. Look what he looks like Paul
Booth
He doesn't look like he's gonna take no for an answer. I'm using your body
His body is an experiment damn look at that poster in the back fighting
terrorism since 1490
That's American Indian Indians. Yeah, that's Native American. I had a t-shirt
like that. Really? Yeah, I stopped wearing it though
I feel like I felt like what am I what is this message? I'm doing
Well, what what should I I might sleeve out just because I want to be 49
Sleeved I'm 48 and sleeved. Yeah, but somehow it fits you what I like tattoos,
man
If you like tattoos, it fits you. I love the artwork
I like the art that goes into it
Yeah
I love it and as I get older I like girls that are tattooed up
Me too
Me too
I didn't used to like them
I've always loved them
I used to be like oh you you crazy damaged bitch
Nah, but then I'm like wait a minute. I'm a crazy damaged bitch too
Yeah, man guys is crazy damaged too
The only website I ever bought like a you know like subscribe to where I used a
credit card to get access is
Suicide Girls
And that's how much they turn me on
But that's just pictures, right?
Yeah
They don't even
No, just pictures
You're just jacking off the pictures?
I didn't I didn't jack off
I just would look at them and be like that was my girlfriend
No, you jacked off for sure why otherwise why would you get it?
Well, I'm a chronic masturbator but I that I have youtube or you know fucking
red tube and all that stuff for that
Well, you know what there's a there's an attraction to a girl that covers her
back and her arms with tattoos for some reason
Because this girl doesn't give a fuck
She's a badass
Well, she knows that this is permanent and she's like yeah, whatever draw on me
Yeah
Pull ups pictures of that Paul booth stuff because some of his stuff is insane.
He did um
that dude who uh
Fucking yeah, look at that like that kind of shit. Hey man, you're not putting
that on my body though
I'm gonna see the artwork before you put it on me. It's really good though. No,
but he's so good dude people wait for years
Hold on back up to that one with the tentacles. Look how insane that is. Go
full screen with that please. You know what?
That's fucking dope. That's insane. See I would get that. God. Do it Callan
But it'd be like why is brian doing that? Well, why isn't he? See that's your
problem?
Let me tell you what your problem is. What? This is your problem. You worry
about what people think
Well, that shit ain't good for you. I don't know
I don't know that that's true. Yeah, you do definitely that's why you don't
have a nice car
And that's why you would you wear weird shoes that zip up on the sides getting
a tesla
I'm getting a tesla. He is getting a tesla. He ordered it. I ordered it. They
fucking drive themselves. You know that right?
I got that. I know. You know how crazy it is? I got the autopilot. Talk to Tom
Papa about it
Yeah, well, I'm getting one. I'm picking it up in March 31st
My buddy Matt, Matt Lichtenberg, he's got one and he said he gets on the
highway
He you press a button twice. I guess yeah, it drives itself and he just starts
texting people not not for me, man
It's just not for me. I said to the guy he explained it to me at the Tesla
dealership
And I said I wouldn't use that and he said oh, yes, you will
Like he was from the future
Especially you and how much traffic you're in it makes sense. Well listen man
when you have a nice car
It makes driving a fun experience, right? Whereas if you have a look, there's
nothing wrong with just having a utilitarian car
You know brock lesner used to drive around in like it was like a chevy citation
or something like that
It was like some weird little red fucking compact car that guy used to get in
that thing
And he's what all of 300 pounds
Every fucking he's enormous thicker than he makes he he makes me like when I
stand next to him
Like we're not the same species. Yeah, it's a totally different kind of human
He'll make you rethink your career. I've never seen him. I was like, ah, maybe
this isn't for me
I've shaken some people's hands before like shaq. He shook shaq's hands shaq as
he's but there's two guys like shane carwin and lesner
Yeah, both those guys you shake their hand you go. Okay. We're not the same
Try getting hit with one of those fucking
Yeah
For me because I didn't grow up with any cars like my parents were never in the
cars
So if you don't know the difference
Like sometimes you got to know the difference like grow up with it. Yeah, I
didn't grow up with it
I just didn't grow up with I've I don't think I've ever driven a fast car
I drove a porsche once in traffic and I couldn't open it up. So I didn't I just
don't I didn't grow up to
I didn't grow up appreciating what the car was and he tried asking to drive my
car like fuck
No, you should take his car up to like little to hunger
Like do you drive a stick? I do. Yeah, I can I start I learned on a stick
listen
I'll let you drive the gt3. It'll change your life. He'd be like crazy eyes. I'll
fucking mr
Deeds change your life. He would ruin your car. No, no, he drives good. He's a
good driver
But you would uh, you would understand maybe the tesla is the beginning of my
oh the tesla is really fast
Super really fast matter of fact one of the fastest cars in the world
especially download that app stupid stupid
Well, he told me that they can
Like if I if I want it faster
They can upgrade it. Yeah. Yeah, there's like some insane mode. I don't think
you need that though ludicrous ludicrous
I don't think you need that though
2.8 seconds zero to 60 in 2.8 seconds crazy for a big four-door sedan
That's insane for a four-door sedan to hit 60 in less than three seconds and
with no sound right. It's like
There's no rumble. There's no explosions like
There are two things I wish I want to start wearing but it's too late for me
I want that tattoo get it
We can do it. Well, he won't do it. He might do it, but he might do something
better. You just got to go to him
Well, I also want to wear it. I can't do that. I can't do that. Just trust it.
I don't fucking like snakes. Sorry, bro
That's what you get. That's how it works. Maybe you could say look my mom was
killed by a snake
Could you lay off the snakes and he would just do like bats or is he's like now
you're gonna get what you're gonna get
Snake when I mean he's a fucking artist essentially I mean not essentially 100%
yeah, and he looks at his art
And he says you know what man people commission me to do pieces and this is
what I want to do
So I'm just gonna say I'm only gonna take that work. I get it
Something wrong though. I mean, I believe he does it. I've heard that does it.
I appreciate it
I don't think there's any bigger artists than in Southern Cal for tattoo
artists. It's the scene man for sure. Oh, yeah
It's a great spot if not the best in the world. I mean it is the thing about
killers here
Shamrock, you got cartoon, you got in OC, you got some killers. Yeah, well,
there's all over the country right now
There's a resurgence in tattooing like tattooing over the last few decades has
become like a really respected art form
Instead of just like a lot of them were like weirdo fringe type artists who
just were really into it
But there's a stigma attached to it. You know, there's always a stigma attached
to being tattooed up
Yeah, you know and now it's not like if you have tattoos like Aaron delva adobe
did this and this is like 50 hours of work
You know and he he planned it all out as one sleeve. He did this one too. He
does both
Really good. I think a lot of it is but he's a friend too. So like I go down
there. We hang
He's cool as fuck. He's an amazing artist
You get a close bond with your tattoo artist like mine's freddy nigretti
Who's who's done all this from shamrock social club in hollywood there and you
know, he's he grew up rough man
He started tattooing in prison. So he's a rough dude
But the first hour with him I was like god. This is the worst. He was like wasn't
talking to me
He was kind of mean and I was like fuck it's gonna be a long time
But then he opened up and he's my boy now, man
That's funny he was mean
Just gangster. Yeah, he's great
Maybe he was worried that you were like a dumb jock type character. A hundred
percent. Yeah, you're very deceiving in that way
Yeah, like a lot of people have the wrong idea of you and like they also like
people get mad at you from podcasts
Ladies and gentlemen, I know it's fun to hate and I've done it before but you
got to understand
We play up shit like when you ramp things up you say ridiculous shit. He knows
what he's doing
He's doing it because it's ridiculous to say. Yeah, I want the reaction. He's a
natural showman. It's fun
It's so much comedy is about exaggeration
Sometimes a lot of it. Yes, a lot of it is. I mean, that's some of the funnest
shit. Yeah, you know
But I think tattoos for me is I think uh one
I didn't I don't know that I express
Tattooing I don't know that there's anything I I can I could never make up a
mind first of all what I'd want on my body
You're making it too big of a deal. Like I don't give up
What it looks so good about your arm by itself? Well the muscle