Name: Joe Rogan Experience #831 - Byron Bowers
Uploaded: 2016-08-10T00:17:12.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #831 - Byron Bowers' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2016-08-10. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #831 - Byron Bowers' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2016-08-10. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #831 - Byron Bowers

byron bowers ladies and gentlemen hey what's going on what's up brother man
thank you for
having me my pleasure what's the latest and the greatest with byron you've been
traveling all
over the place man i check your instagram out uh man i just got back from the
dominican republic
uh what um a few days ago and uh it was a very interesting experience yeah yeah
like anytime you
go somewhere tropical you like man this place is beautiful and by that third
day you'd be like man
this is this is horrible politics the way they treat people oh so you see the
balance of you know
everything especially as a you know uh being from where i'm from and being
black and what's going on
i'm always in exotic places when cops are killing black people so it pulls you
out of the situation
and lets you see how you know fucked up things are for like haitian people well
yeah i mean
pretty much every third world country deals with all kinds of fucked up shit
yeah like way worse than we
have it here it puts things into perspective like i often think like if if
united states wasn't
established just a few hundred years ago if that didn't happen like what would
the world be like
like what would most of the world be like a lot of these countries that you
visit where you deal with
insane police corruption like i've i've had friends that have been pulled over
in mexico
and you know the the cops basically just straight up tell you like do you want
to get out of this
give me some fucking money yeah i think i had a situation like that uh coming
through tsa but i didn't
realize until they let me go but they held me for a long time where uh in dominican
republic because
i had on a button-up shirt that's denim like the one i'm wearing now and they
was like take your jacket
off and i'm pre-checked so when you become pre-checked it's like a white
privilege and i'm like i'm not
taking off my sh this is not a jacket this is a shirt so in the dominican
republic yeah doing this
and i'm fly got on glasses and stuff and they was like oh okay oh it's a shirt
huh come through and
then as soon as i came through they was like this your bag and they started
trying to take my cologne
like yeah that's flammable you can't take that on a plane or my umbrella yeah
you can't take umbrellas
on a plane that's a weapon sorry and they just held me there and we just made
eye contact with each
other i'm like show me on the chart that's all i kept saying and then after a
while they was like
you know what you could take it you know so after a while they just gave up
yeah they gave up because
i was like okay if i check the bag can i take everything and they was like yeah
so what i did
i unloaded all my bags and start rearranging things so i could put it so i
could check it
and you can make it back to america but once they saw me doing that and they
saw how neat i was and
like every time they touch something i had to put it back a certain way they
like it's just gonna be
waste of time for even us yeah but don't they have rules like we have rules as
far as like how many
ounces of liquid and stuff like that you could take on a plane they do but i
made it over there so that's
why i was trying to get them to explain to me like why exactly yeah but it
probably made it over there
because the people that work at tsa over here are barely paying attention well
you know i take it
everywhere i take it everywhere how big is your uh cologne first of all cologne
stinky man we were in
that i love i love it i know you disagree with cologne you know i mean i
disagree yeah it's a
political point i disagree with cologne you more alpha though you know i mean
you could choke them
out with your muscles and i could choke them with the smell um okay i'm not
exactly sure where to go
with that but so how big is the uh cologne probably like three point something
ounces okay see i think
you could bring on like four ounces of liquid yeah isn't that how it works yep
in your toiletry bag
yeah it was in the toiletry bag now mind you i just i went from montreal too so
i went from montreal
from new york to montreal here to the dominican republic so this same luggage
has been like everywhere
so what were you doing down dominican republic oh i met up with some friends of
mine from college
some african homeboys and i really hopped in on their trip because they visit
the dr a lot and i
wanted to see what it was like and i snorkeled a lot like i came back sore but
yeah i did a lot of
time in the water morning evening and like late afternoon well it's beautiful
for that yeah that's
one of the cool things about those tropical climates the uh the oceans down
there are amazing the ocean
are amazing some of the reefs wasn't as you know not like when i was in jamaica
or when i like in
hawaii where everything just comes alive and it looks like a city but it
definitely you do feel like
you landed on another planet to me and you're and i'm flying like i'm cruising
over you know the terrain
you mean when you're swimming when i swim yeah anytime i snorkel like it's that
it's that other world
experience to me yeah man i'm a big fan of the water but the sharks it up for
me yeah i'm just not into
getting eaten well yeah that's the thing why sometimes i keep looking around
like um especially
if it's not a lot of things in the water uh but i saw squid that was the most
beautiful thing i saw from
this trip was just like 40 baby squid all lined up in a row um that looked like
they'd just been born
you know and they were just there and i didn't even know they were squid i
thought it was like
fish with interesting fans because it looked like you know like a lady just
doing her dress like that
when i got close i could i realized that i was at the tentacle park uh and i
just locked eyes with
him and i was like oh this is the most beautiful thing you know duncan trestle
yeah duncan has this
uh new virtual reality thing it's a virtual it's called the htv vive and uh you
you put it on
and you you actually feel like you're underwater they have this program because
i think it's called deep
blue or something like that something blue um but you put it on and one of the
uh reality programs
that you put on is an ocean one and you're standing at the bottom of this like
ocean area and these fish
swim by and it's it's not a hundred percent realistic because the graphics aren't
totally there yet yeah
but it's like 85 realistic that's amazing a whale pulls up to you and you get
to look at the whale like
you look in its eyes but like i don't know if you ever used any kind of virtual
reality i'm pretty
new to it too yeah but you get a full 360 degrees like you can look down you
can look up you can look
everywhere so this whale as it's in front of you you could choose different
spots on the whale that
you look at you can look at its eyes you can look at its tail it's fascinating
and it lets you know
that you know within a hundred years from now probably not even probably like
20 within 20 years from now oh
this is it is this the program so this is it right here so you you stand there
and you're looking
around like that dude's just looking around with these goggles on yeah and this
is what you're seeing
i mean you're seeing it feels like the actual ocean yeah that's uh that's
basically what it that's
basically what it looks and feel like you know uh that's beautiful right there
it's crazy that that's
what is it like 79 of the earth or something like that is yeah when we looked
it up the other day it
was uh over 70 of the earth is water and 95 of that is ocean water that's
amazing it's almost like
how they say our bodies are made up of the same not quite i think a body is
like 60 they used to say
it was like 90 percent water see find out what that is i think the human body
is actually like 60
water something like that maybe but i've i've experienced virtual reality uh
the one where you
could just travel everywhere around the world 65 average human bodies between
50 and 65 water
averaging around 57 to 60 percent average percentage of water in infants is
much higher typically around
75 to 78 percent water huh that makes sense dropping to 65 by one year of age a
little water balloons
it's probably why the skin gets crazy like the older we get the water is
dropping in it the water's
dropping in it yeah like they said the percentage goes down the older you get
oh man you're probably just
drinking too much i'll get wrinkles and stuff yeah that's actually collagen
that's uh that's the
wrinkle thing is the elasticity of your skin gives out your body stops
producing collagen correctly but
you you can mitigate some of that with like moisture and you know like some
people use creams and
like that but at the end of the day time time wins time wins i definitely use
creams i use creams do you
and cologne yeah yeah all things that stink all things well i can't use i can't
use dyes and perfumes
in my lotions how come it'll it makes my skin it dries my skin out make it
break out perfumes in
lotions but you can wear cologne yeah i wear cologne cologne lasts a certain
amount of hours
and it lands on your skin so you know look at you you should be a cologne
commercial yeah it lands on your
skin so dedicated have you always worn cologne uh no well once i got into it my
my mom like i was
raised by my mom like our sense of smell is just so strong you know so it was
always fragrance around
and to me that's the first like that that can alter your your mindset or your
mode like when you smell
something good mm-hmm yeah yeah it's an anchor it can cause like a like a
mental trigger yeah like it
brings you back to that place like certain smells like smell of apple pie if
your mom cooked apple pie
or something like that you could smell it immediately transport you back to
that good place yeah or bad
place or bad place like yeah like i like like sexy smells so i like to be
reminded of something that's
pleasant like a woman like sexy smells yeah you know so i don't wear like
hardcore masculine but i like
to smell like a rose like you like to smell like a rose i like to smell like
something fresh like that
you know i'm learning a lot about you byron like yeah it take me two hours to
pick out my fragrance you
know what i mean what hold on it takes you two hours to pick out your fragrance
yeah is this in a day
or like when you go to a fragrance store when i when i went to the fragrance
store so you're that dude
just wandering around there touching this one yeah smelling it yeah and if i
don't get like a small
like erection like a little erection a little erection yeah like if it don't
turn me on in a sense
then i just it's not the one huh but you know it just like you know like when
you feel the energy of a
lady or you know whatever you're attracted to or the sound of a motor when it
goes by you know what i mean
well i'm with you on that yeah yeah they've said that on with engines it
actually like when you hear
an engine revving it actually raises men's testosterone but why i wonder why it's
uh it's like i don't know
anybody ever driven a car with pipes which is rare in california to have custom
pipes but you think it's
rare yeah to be like for as far as like loud and those things are everywhere
really yeah they crack down on
them here it's not like in george like i'm from georgia where you oh you can
get a honda and put
an open exhaust i have a quarter engine take the stuff off yeah see that's
stupid if you got a honda
yeah you shouldn't do that if you have a four-cylinder that's awful i did that
before but my friend had a
cobra mustang 68 and you can hear that car coming down the street but when you
hear it in a real car with
a real motor it's almost like a like a tiger growling or something or it's just
an energy you want to
release when you press the gas yeah you know so that it makes you it just does
something to you
what's little explosions i mean it's control explosions essentially i mean that's
what an engine is right
it's just the steel explo