Name: Joe Rogan Experience #903 - Tony Hinchcliffe & Brian Redban
Uploaded: 2017-01-24T18:03:51.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #903 - Tony Hinchcliffe & Brian Redban' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-01-24. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #903 - Tony Hinchcliffe & Brian Redban' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-01-24. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #903 - Tony Hinchcliffe & Brian Redban

Tony Hinchcliffe hiding right now in the basement from Chris Cyborg this just
in
President Trump has not responded to any of Tony's calls he's ignored all of
his tweets
Tony does not know what to do Brian Redman is not helping I am trying to find
the sound effect for
breaking news no we don't need giant icons on your phone now did you switch the
size
your icon no no no I break their size that's us what are those sound oh that's
why I was confused I was like what I thought those are Joe like you had some
hack to your phone I all sudden wanted that that's how stupid people are I see
like like a different size icon oh it's different than what I have yeah I just
got a hacked fire stick off eBay you know our stick Amazon one yeah it's one of
those things where you put in your you have everything like movies that are in
the movie theaters you have every single TV show pay-per-views yeah you get
yeah all
everything you get well you know what those little those little Amazon things
or
the little Google ones those little Google sticks terms you stick them in a USB
port
on your computer or on your TV and you could stream something from your
computer
right to that and it plays on the TV how in the fuck does that work because
like
your Apple TV I have Apple TV it's like like a Big Mac right it's but Big Mac
sized but
this is like a USB stick it's got a little processor the same like in the cell
phone in
in it that's amazing yeah I don't know how any of that stuff works I can barely
get the TV I have
to work it's because I was watching some fights the other day on ESPN 3 and I
don't know if you knew
this but ESPN 3 is not really a station it's a it's a website yeah there's ESPN
1 and ESPN 2
those are both on TV but ESPN 3 is like a website so they had glory fights on
ESPN 3
got an issue here Jamie's in here there must be an issue ESPN 3 I had to watch
the
fights on ESPN 3 because they were on UFC Fight Pass had glory on up until this
one
fight and then from that one fight on it was all on ESPN 3 so I had it on my
laptop
and then I said well oh I don't have a fucking Apple laptop anymore now I can't
like shoot it directly to the Apple TV and then I found out all you need is one
of those little drives you stick that sucker in your TV are you sure I could
yeah that's how that works a little USB drive and then you can do it right from
your phone to your TV I just bought an antenna the other day just to see like
what local channels I can get holy shit stress signals 112 I got 112 channels
they're all Mexican and they're all the way people it's just distress signals
like the
first episode of Fear the Walking Dead they're like I think I hear something
it's weird gunshot bang there's one channel that just plays like Johnny Carson
in
like old shows from the 80s oh good call and then there's just like yeah there's
Russian Mexican Korean but it is weird just watching like all these free
channels
they well it had that was one of the things with radio one of the things that
happened with radio is in LA in particular they would close down like when
they closed down that FM talk station there's an FM talk station and they
closed it down and then a Mexican station popped up I think what was another
talk
show pretty much every FM station in LA is a very Mexican station there's a lot
of
Mexican like morning radio shows all of them there they all sound the same
there's
it's always like some big Mexican guy and some like little tiny guy it's always
like
hey you 88.7 88.7 88.7 you sound Japanese that's terrible yeah that's a
terrible that was an
Asian accent it's definitely not a worst racist ever super Mexican radio
station the worst Mexican of all time
but I when I would pass by these bus stops like all over LA you'd see these
billboards that were for these stations that you're never gonna listen to you
know like there's this one neighborhood that my ex-gardener I had an ex-gardener
used to fight chickens he was a he was a funny dude man he came over here a
couple times from Mexico he snuck over here worked over in America and it's not
back and then snuck back again wow what do you mean he fought chickens he used
to
have chicken fight oh I thought you meant he was really not really him in terms
of
he would go he would go but the other people would actually fight the chickens
and it was like this thing where all the men in this community would go and
they
all had these roosters I mean this we went to this guy's place and went to
check
out his backyard and he had I don't know a hundred rooster cages and I'm not
bullshitting they were fucking stacked on top of each other and then they had
an
arena you'd go into the arena it was like a little barn and then it's like a
little sunken in area that they had dug out and put like a little fence around
and that's where they would chuck the chickens in and so they'd have two guys
and they would handle the chickens and they put spurs on the chickens so it's
not just the chickens fight each other but they put little razor blades on
their
feet whoa yeah and then they bet on who wins the fight and then when they win
like when the way know that either one both chickens are fucked like they're
essentially dead like maybe if you're lucky your chicken doesn't get totally
fucked are there chicken commentators someone like and here we crow something
like that you know what I mean fuck and here you can't help yourself crow you
can't
help yourself you're terrible bird fighting yeah but it's apparently a huge
thing in the Mexican community but it's interesting is like you remember when
Michael Vick got in that big horrible situation when they found out that he was
killing dogs and he had dog fights and you know this terrible thing he's
executing
dogs that shit is happening all throughout the south every day it's a huge part
of
their culture about animal fights like dog fights but much more so chicken
fights and
chicken fights is a weird one where you caught kind of okay with it you know
yeah
like people people have a hierarchy of animals that they give a shit whether or
not
they're having a bad life and chickens are super low on that scale it's sort of
weird
that the black people have dog fights and the Mexicans have chicken fights you
would think the black people would have chicken fights because then they could
just have dinner afterwards you know what I mean their favorite well the
Mexicans eat chickens too dude I don't know my Mexicans eat the dogs sushi
sushi served on a samurai sword my my ex-girlfriend used to live liking like
the
ghetto part of Los Angeles and it was always so weird at like six in the
morning how many are you hurt like it was like a lot like just get used to it
yeah it
becomes like norm for the community right for someone to have a fucking rooster
in
there you were tripping our balls off in Joshua tree one night and it was like
three or four a.m. the Sun was not out at all and there was one rooster that in
the
middle of the night was like and we we were always out there big group of
comedians and us and we started fucking dying riffing about this like you know
how
out of control this chickens life is where you know he's such an idiot that he's
barking in the middle of the night all the other chickens are like there you
look
who's blowing his load early over here we're all a mushrooms is dying in this
premature ejaculating basically chicken I wonder if he was blind and he was
just
like didn't want anybody to know maybe his clocks off he took a nap earlier in
the day he would just jump the gun yeah he'd be the guy who jumps the guy felt
way
too refreshed or maybe he felt that you guys were on mushrooms and he's like he
killed they're gonna eat us this is these people are crazy or we're on
mushrooms and
like this will be hilarious oh they'll love this watch this three in the
morning bomb yeah maybe you're very presence or maybe you guys are loud and
you woke them up probably we were laughing a lot that's what it is that's a
fun probably got pissed it's probably a dog barking right it's probably like a
bunch
of reasons why a chicken does that not just because they wake up but also maybe
because fuck you shut up yeah try to sleep over here it's not bad enough I
sleep with
my feet on a stick do they yeah they perch and so they sleep they climb up we
have
these areas in my chicken coop where they climb up and they put their feet down
and
we have other areas where they like could go into a little chicken house and
they
could like go inside and there's like a little roof on the chicken house they
fucking never use it they don't use that they don't want to sit down they want
to
like have their feet on something they like to grab on something and hang on
hmm it's weird so because they're used to perching like in the wild their their
bodies designed we think of it as our feet well if I had to hang by my hands I'd
be
so fucking tired but their hands are so different like their feet are designed
for that like it doesn't make them tired that's an evolutionary advantage they
can
live in trees how many chickens do you have 23 Wow I didn't know you had that
many yeah I have a gang of chickens I eat fresh eggs like every how many eggs
is
23 a day depends on the time of year like this time of year they're starting to
they're they're making a lot of eggs because it's cold out and it's been
raining and when when there's less sunlight they make more eggs so do you
throw a lot of eggs away or do you just no no give them away give away people
yeah
man but I eat a lot of them you know if there's if there's 23 of them they
might make 10 eggs a day and I probably eat five of those oh maybe six that's
great yeah I eat a lot of eggs everybody eats eggs weed eggs and eggs are not
bad
for you that's a fucking long-standing myth that someone concocted in the 1950s
and there was a New York Times article about it if you're really interested it's
terrible but the sugar companies for not that much money for what's like in
American dollars today like fifty thousand dollars they paid off a bunch of
scientists to take these reports and write reports saying that saturated fat
was
causing people to have heart disease and get overweight and when it was really
sugar what about cholesterol it's not bad for you not only is cholesterol not
bad
for you it depends on what kind of cholesterol there's certain types of
cholesterol that people have genetic propensities for they're not good but
there's LDL cholesterol and then there's actually like different sizes of
different LDL cholesterol and some of it's actually good for you and some of it's
not good for you there's HDL cholesterol but dietary cholesterol like eating
dietary cholesterol doesn't move it doesn't move the blood lipids it doesn't
change that's not what changes your cholesterol it's like sedentary
lifestyle and saturated and sugar and processed foods those things elevate
cholesterol more than eating things with cholesterol it's very strange and then
saturated fat we all grew up thinking saturated fat was bad that's why you have
margarine right margarine is fucking illegal now do you know that is this you
know
trans fats are illegal now do you know trans fats in the next three years they
have to remove them from food they have three more years to take them out of
food
they gave them like a grace period of three years so these companies can shift
their manufacturing what's that food that has trans fats that we all yes a lot
of
like Doritos and shit I don't know if Doritos but Fritos some shit with trans
fats in
it yeah so those are gonna start tasting different soon probably all it tastes
as
good well it might taste better honestly the thing is that people thought they're
like margarine was good for you margarine is fucking terrible for you yeah
unsaturated fat is bad for you saturated fat is good for you that's how fucking
stupid we are yeah our whole lives we grew up with shitty information and a lot
of it is
because scientists were pai