Name: Henry Rollins on His Trip to North Korea
Uploaded: 2017-01-31T18:34:09.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Henry Rollins on His Trip to North Korea' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-01-31. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Henry Rollins on His Trip to North Korea' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-01-31. Transcript available.

Hello freak bitches
I'm working on my second photo book. My first one came out and
The second one's gonna be pretty cool cuz it's all my North Korea shots. That'll
be crazy. Oh wow. You went to North Korea
Yeah, it took three years to get that visa a few years ago. It was just sad. It
was when Kim Jong-il was still alive
It was Kim Jong-il. Yeah, the last days of Kim Jong-il before Kim Jong-un. Yeah.
Yeah, and it was just you know like
When I was in Iran just like they they point you at what you're supposed to
look at don't look over here
It's a propaganda to how much time did you spend in North Korea about a week
I was in Pyongyang and the areas around Pyongyang and then I went there via
Beijing and
Then from there up to Mongolia then over to Bhutan. What was North Korea like
just sad you know this poor people
Who are scared of their government and my tour guides?
Since I went there alone, they were very suspicious of me. So they put two tour
spies on me
the nice one who talked to me and the mean one who just scowled and took notes
and
Every day the guy would ask me basically the same questions like when a
detective is trying to peel the layers of onion skin off
So you said you're a businessman. I'm like yeah
Like it. So what do you do? Like, you know, I edit books, which is true
Mine and this really what are the books about? I said, well, you know, often
they're not that good
And so I'm you're all put in one hotel
You and the Dutch tourists and the Australians everyone's in the one hotel
across the bridge that's with men with rifles
You're not going anywhere and so every day they go on their buses and I get in
the car and the Australians recognize me
the Brits recognized me and they all want photos and I'm walking to the
whatever that that room is the
the room with the north and south meet
Where they they come in through the northern door in the southern doors that
blue room the DSJ
I'll come up with the joint the JSA the joint security area something like that.
I
Pulled one of the Australians to the side. I said, can you please?
Call your friends off me because my tour spy is starting to ask me really weird
questions about why people want
Their photo with me and if I'm caught being in movies writing books rock and
roll
I'm going downtown for a meeting that I might not get out of and so he cooled
out all his Australian friends
But then there's this one British guy who just kept getting in my face with the
camera because you're all getting taken to the same places
And I'll never forget this my tour guide who for the previous three days was
like his English was from school like
Henry he went from that to
How does this guy know you and all of a sudden his English was as good as mine?
I'm like, oh, no
And I'm not good at lying. So I said I met him in the breakfast room. I don't
know. Maybe he's hot for me
I have no I just tried to explain it away and I just had to kind of go
I don't know and I had to try and avoid this guy and
And I I was getting I was really nervous the last day I was there when they
finally took me back to the airport in Beijing
I'm like damn man
Am I really getting on this plane and when the plane took off man?
I just like okay, I did that but why wouldn't you just say I'm a musician? I'm
I won't let you in form I went on a tourist visa and if you claim any of that
You're gonna get tons of scrutiny and they're not gonna let you in they won't
let you in if you're an artist absolutely absolutely not
Because they're just they fear it
They fear what you'll go back to the mainland with something in Iran
So because you're a public person they don't like but absolutely they let the
basketball player what the fuck robin yeah
How did you tell the party line?
And just told Obama, you know, just just call your pal Kim sure that'll work
out great and same thing when I was in I was I went to Tehran
Via Dubai and the guy who met me at the airport after the airport people got
done grilling me
He said look I got your visa. I know who you are. I'm not your tour guide. He's
a government guy
Don't tell him what you do for a living. We'll never get you out of here
It's the last time is Christ. Yeah, the last day I'm in that country
I'm eating dinner with this guy and his amazing wife
They're both like rocket scientists and they you know they get by with a
website that gets visas done
So his cousin her cousin Anusha the woman her cousin
calls her and says your friend Henry's on TV and
Ahmed dropped his fork and said we've got to go we have to get you to your your
hotel
You got to pack up right now. We just go to the airport check in check your
luggage find a corner
Put your face in it and wait for the flight and I got to the I got to the
airport like four hours early
Because he said you just you got to go whoa
And so I just sat there in the airport with my face down and then eventually
got on like, you know
That the 3:00 a.m. To Dubai and I was out of there. Holy shit. Yeah
What would happen if you got caught questions which leads to more questions and
you just don't know it turns into like well
He's been interrogated for the last three months and we don't know and since I'm
not a hot-looking girl
President Clinton's not coming to rescue me and and so those are the two
countries. I've been to where
Don't tell them what you do with what I was instructed before I left Wow. Yeah
I