Name: Joe Rogan Experience #922 - Philip DeFranco
Uploaded: 2017-02-24T21:23:25.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #922 - Philip DeFranco' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-02-24. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #922 - Philip DeFranco' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-02-24. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #922 - Philip DeFranco

Young Jamie
Oh, Philip DeFranco. All right, buddy. I'm good man. It's cracking. I'm good
all the all the conversation
We had right before there'll be the good stuff and then all this could be two
hours of bed
Yeah, we shit on some movies and got got mad about Republicans and talking and
then we got mad about Democrats and you're putting
You're putting a "we" and an "I" statement. Yep. I'm lopping you in. I was just
being your therapist, man. Oh, thanks, dude. Sweet
So sweet of you. Isn't that what a podcast is? Yes. You're just like, let me
let me hear what you're saying
But then let me let me talk about the world
In a way. Yeah. Is that a phone? That's a tiny little one. It's a tiny one, man
Oh, you got the little tiny iPhone. Yeah, this is this is for my daily example
of why I need to be patient
I had an iphone 6 plus the biggest storage. I was I was really happy with it
And I was like, man, I need to get that that iphone 7
And the only one they had was the small one with the smallest storage and it's
it's a it's a piece of garbage
You don't like it? No. Well, just because I'm like, you know, I don't need that
much storage
I'll use the cloud, but I don't because I don't trust the cloud
So I scared of all those dick pics getting all the dick pics
I think that's the good thing about not being extraordinary in any way. I'm not
doing that
You don't have to worry about your dirt. Yeah, I'm just like no one needs to
see it
So you just ran out of what is it like a 32 gigabyte or something like that?
Yeah, so it's like I have to I'm like which memory will I delete before I can
make new ones
Oh, that's annoying
It makes me be a little bit selective, but I don't know in this day and age it's
stupid
Does it bother you that it's small?
Um, not as much, but you get used to it, right?
Yeah, what do you have? Yeah, I have a seven plus. Yeah, man
You said when you're looking at websites in particular where you don't have to
expand the screen to get the entire thing
You don't have to go back and forth to get the entire article
And there's little tricks that people don't know where it's like you just you
double tap not push in but double tap and
Like all that shit that's on the top of the screen. It comes down for you. Mm-hmm.
They just use it for people with tiny hands
Oh, yeah, that's right. Yeah, that if you double tap the home button, right?
There's stuff there's stuff they made for for people that that just aren't don't
don't fit like the the standard
And you just you just use them and then and then fucking buzzfeed calls it life
hacks
Then they're like 10 things you didn't know life. Let's get let's get 7 million
views off of some basic shit
There was that one phone that they had
I guess it was the iphone 4 that had the sharper edges on the side and it was
very narrow
That's the perfect size phone for texting you think so?
Yeah, it just fits in your hand perfect like it locks in place like I can text
with one hand with this thing
but
Not that easy. It's a little slippery. You just gotta switch to get like that
swipey keyboard. Oh, no
No, why I've seen people do that brian cowan dude that makes you angry. No, it
doesn't make me angry
My friend brian cowan was trying to show me how good it was like look look look
all right
I just go from here to here and he fucked it up a few times
I'm like that thing can go fuck off just just from this five minutes of before
and after it's like I hate swipey
Keyboards and movies where kids have cancer two things. I won't stand for I
miss
They're pulling on your heartstrings if you they show you cancer and a kid has
cancer like right away
Like look you could have made me sad in a less brutal way
So are you okay if in the trailer they let you know the kid has cancer?
That's fucking stupid. I see what they're doing. It's like get out of here and
you this we're talking about arrival
I didn't even watch the movie
I watched the movie for three minutes the girl had cancer and i'm like fuck you
and I hung it up
I'm going to sleep. I'm not going to watch this
I don't want to go on this depressing journey right before bed. It's going to
give me fucked up dreams
So uninterested in depressing movies. I I know
I read the news. I watch television. I pay attention to
Internet videos from all over the world of depressing shit. I know it's real.
Yeah, I I think though the moment I had my my first kid
I was like, okay
This is this is my realization that at any point I could have the most damaging
pain in the world
So I get that I don't need I don't need to be depressed and reminded of that at
every moment
Because that's what I'm constantly thinking about when I'm not having a happy
moment
I'm like how how could the world completely fuck up my whole being? Yeah, I'm
more interested in funny things these days or
Really stupid horror movies. Is that just escapism from like the fucking
insanity that we're dealing with? Yeah, that's all it is
It's all escapism. I mean even game of thrones or you know like house of cards,
which is like about politics itself
Total escapism. These are not real people. Yeah, but that's what I end up
finding is I end up rooting for
People I'd normally wouldn't root for right so in house of cards, and I'm
totally rooting for him and breaking bad
Even in the final season when he's doing all that fucked up stuff. I'm like
yeah, Walter White. I'm with you, man
I'm with you. I didn't watch the final season. I didn't get that far, but uh, I'm
in the middle of
I'm like season three right now of house cards. Okay, and yeah, Kevin Spacey's
goddamn murderer
I'm trying to remember a third if the third season's kind of like the the like
meh season before because last season the last season was amazing
What is it like how they have five out for is there for us?
So three I think was kind of it just felt like a setup season now for burning
through them, man
I'm fucking cooking through them. Yeah, I never you know four or five a week
Yeah
I mean if you if you haven't started that like episode one of season two, that's
where I was like, okay
I'm in I mean this is because I feel like you always have to have that that one
episode where you don't know what's gonna happen where you're like
Okay, I'm I'm on fucking shaky ground
This isn't something that I'm gonna watch while I'm cooking dinner and not
really paying attention and not miss anything out
Right, that's like that's like scandal. You're like, okay
They're gonna go on some like fucking eight-minute monologue where it's like
you can't do blah blah blah blah blah
And then you're just like what happened. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, whatever bullshit.
Well
Escapism is I mean it's fun
It's but after a while you just I think you just run it runs its core
I think just absorbing media just taking in too much after a while you just get
extremely jaded
You know, like I've seen people that you know are tweeting about things online
and you go god that guy's fucking jaded man
Like people are so jaded and they realize like the amount of information the
amount of data that people are getting on a daily basis
It's just you're not designed for this. Yeah, no one's designed
I have unlimited options for entertainment viewing at your disposal on demand
all the time
If you ever want to like a quick reminder of how ADD and how true that is
Just look at your fucking like not you specifically, but your own Twitter
history
I'll go from talking about something like deeply political and I'm like this
fucking craziness to like did you see tonight's episode?
And there's like a difference of five minutes
Exactly
Everything's always happening. Yeah, and I just I don't get it. I'm critical of
it
But I'm part of it. You know well, we're definitely changing and our attention
span is changing and
Probably not for the better and we're like accustomed to things being quick and
rapid like here's a perfect example
Okay, the way you guys edit your videos. Mmm. You don't have any pauses. You're
not human in your video
That is because I I got like a C-minus in public speaking
I've never everybody does it everybody on YouTube does it
They all do that thing where they take out all the ums and pauses and they go
from one thing to the other
Because it is it is a battle of attention and battle of eyes
Yeah, but I think that I think people are seeing more and more especially even
the YouTube the YouTube algorithm
Podcasts, I think that there is 100% always going to be an audience for longer
form things
My videos started out as it was even in the the little intro sequence it
started out as three to four minutes
Let me talk about the world for three or four minutes. My videos now are 10 to
18 minutes every day granted a lot more is happening every day
Yeah, like this this new new presidency and and stuff like that
But there is an audience that that wants more and so you had the vine guys, but
even I mean fines dead now
But those guys have now launched into longer form pieces where some of it is
three to four and then some are daily 10 to 18 minute pieces
So I think there's always going to be an audience people are tuning in longer
more than ever because the internet was tuned in for for
six seconds
15 seconds one minute three to four and it's just getting longer and longer
But it's not even just the longer longer even if you do a three minute thing
You're still going to edit out all those little tiny gaps in between sentences.
Yeah, what's that about?
It's just getting out as much and if I didn't if I if I stopped cutting out my
pauses my videos be five minutes longer
It'd be a it'd be a nightmare. Really? Yeah
Yeah, because my videos I don't I don't script and I'm not reading from
everyone else or from something someone else wrote
I do all my own research. It's me taking all the the information and then just
going on this this word soup
Rambly thing for for five minutes to make a three-minute piece
Do you feel like you take in too much data because you're doing all this you
have you have to I have to have to I you know
I the main difference between I think the last time I came on here, which was
about two years ago and now
Is back then I was I was kind of scared to share my opinion right so I would
just I would I was just kind of repetition of
Reddit stories that popped up and and things that that popped up on websites of
like this thing happened
Anyway, here's the next thing that happened. So you're more of an aggregator of
things that have happened
I feel like I was then and now it's more of because no one trusts anything
right where we talk about
Right-wing or left-wing people being in their own bubbles and you know we go in
like I know I know the truth
but you might not because you're just sticking to the stuff that that that you
believe in and then you see something from an outside source and go
Well, that's bullshit. That's on BuzzFeed, right? Well, and and that's and that's
the problem
I mean BuzzFeed really in my opinion fuck themselves with the way that they
they release those documents that couldn't be
completely confirmed right with the whole like Trump and the the prostitutes peeing
on the bed stuff and they're like we can't we can't confirm it and
Neither can any of the other places that have gotten this information can't
confirm it
But there is this piece of paper that says that it may have happened
Well, what's even worse is all these mainstream news sources were doing it
Yeah, we're all releasing this story the salacious details on the story of
Donald Trump and the Russian prostitutes
water sports
The fuck out of here that just a way it read I immediately called bullshit
I like do you really think that he has people pee on him?
Well, you really think people pee on the bed and he wants them to pee on the
bed and he watches like fuck off
So that's the problem right is that's not even the actual thing that the story
was but that's what it turned into the whole story
Ended up being or like was supposed to be that
Barack Obama and Michelle Obama staye