Name: Joe Rogan Experience #932 - TJ Kirk
Uploaded: 2017-03-16T00:24:28.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #932 - TJ Kirk' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-03-16. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #932 - TJ Kirk' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-03-16. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #932 - TJ Kirk

Boom, boom.
Five, four, three, two, one.
We're live here from the valley with the artist formerly known as the Amazing Atheist.
Hello.
Imagine if I just started talking like that, no explanation, I just kept it
going for years.
Everybody's like, one day he's going to drop it.
I kind of dropped it a little.
The Amazing Atheist, right?
Yeah, I mean, I still use it.
I oscillate.
I'm kind of trying to transition to just using my real name.
Well, the last time you were here, you talked about that, and that was, I think,
two years ago.
So this was slow.
It was a year and three months ago.
Oh, that's it?
Yeah.
Really?
Yeah.
Wow.
It was January of 2016.
Why do I feel like it was so, my memory?
I don't know.
You know what?
You know that Dunbar's number thing where you can only fit so many people in
your brain?
Yeah.
There's definitely that going on in my head, and then too much data.
My hard drive is fucked.
You know, if you get an old laptop, and it keeps telling you you have to delete
some files
because you're running out of space, and that's my brain.
Yeah.
I mean, my brain is even worse because literally things like, things I knew
yesterday, I don't
know today anymore.
Yeah.
Like, my memory is dog shit.
And you were just saying you haven't smoked pot in days.
Yeah.
Hmm.
Not in days.
Interesting.
Days and days.
Days and days and days.
I fucked up and had an edible last night.
I did this show that my friend Jeremiah Watkins has, and it's like a make-em-up
show.
They call it stand-up on the spot where the audience will yell out, you know,
fried broccoli,
like whatever, and you just have to rant on broccoli, like what your thoughts
are, try
to get some comedy out of it.
And occasionally, maybe one out of ten subjects, it will actually yield a real
bit that'll become
a bit in your act.
It's really kind of amazing when you put on the pressure like that.
So I said, what a good time to test the deep end of the pool and find out what
these speed
weed edibles are all about.
Whew.
I fucked up.
Yeah.
Fucked up.
My brother had like a panic attack on edibles just like a few days ago.
My friend brought over some like pot brownies, and he had one.
He's not really used to edibles.
Anyway, I go to bed.
I'm laying down.
I'm watching like Star Trek Deep Space Nine or some shit.
I get a knock on the door like, TJ, hey, man, can you come out here for a
minute?
I'm like, okay, what the hell is this?
I go out there, he's like, I'm really not feeling good, man.
I think I'm having a heart attack, dude.
I'm like, dude, you're probably just having a panic attack from too much weed.
Okay, have you, has this ever happened to you?
Has this ever happened to you?
I'm like, yeah, it's happened to me before.
Just calm down.
I know your heart's racing.
You feel disoriented and shit.
I thought I was calming him down.
I spent like 30 minutes talking him down, but finally, you know, and he seemed
like he was like, okay, yeah, yeah, I'm cool now.
I'm cool now.
And then just all of a sudden, like, no, I feel terrible.
We got to go to the hospital.
I got to go to the hospital, dude.
I got to go to the fucking hospital.
And I drove him over there and I sat down in that fucking hospital waiting room
and they, there was like this fucking ad for Stanley Steamer.
And there was this terrible jingle and I'm like, it's like the worst jingle I've
ever heard.
It's not going to get stuck in my head.
And now to this day, call 1-800-STEAMER.
Stanley Steamer, you're certified cleaner.
I'll be in bed at night and that shit will be in my head just over and over and
over and over and over again.
Yeah, they have wizards that come up with those things, man.
Even the ones that suck.
They just get in there, you know?
Oh yeah, it's a terrible one.
And then he gets out.
They gave him some fucking Ativan.
You know what you can give him next time?
Just give him some coffee.
Coffee's like one of the best things.
Really?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
There's something about caffeine apparently that counteracts the effects of
marijuana.
When you're really high, they say just drink some coffee.
I'll have to do that next time.
Yeah.
If that happens.
Isn't that true?
That is true, right?
At in a hot shower, I think.
That's right.
Everyone's got their own fucking home remedy for this shit, I guess.
But here's the thing.
Once you've done it a few times, you realize, well, what the panic attack is,
is essentially
your brain taking an audit of all the things that are real worries that you
haven't been
considering at all.
And then they fly.
Well, you're going to die someday.
Are you prepared?
Like, what if it's tomorrow?
Are you ready?
Have you had a good life?
What if someone close to you dies?
You think you're going to be able to recover?
You just start thinking like really crazy shit, and it just makes you aware of
those things.
And then once it wears off, you know, you reach that sort of neutral point
again.
Well, he's a hypochondriac to begin with.
Oh, that's not good.
You can't give guys like that weed.
You should know better.
Well, he's fine if he smokes it, but if he eats it, it's a different thing.
It's a different shit.
It's a totally different thing.
So your podcast was the big podcast that kind of sunk Milo.
It was kind of a combination of mine and yours.
And I remember it was me watching him on your show that led us to ask about
that.
Because I saw him on your show, and he was like God at the time.
Because I remember at the time he was on our show, I told Paul, one of my co-hosts,
like,
Paul, this guy ain't no lightweight, and he's got a huge army of sycophants
right now.
If you get in a debate with him, if you lose, you're a total bitch.
If you tie, you lose.
If you win by a little, you lose.
The only way you can actually beat him with his army of sycophants at this time
is if you just demolish him.
So don't even try.
You were concerned about this?
Like this is like something you planned out in advance?
No, I mean, I wasn't really, it wasn't really a plan.
I just wanted to bring it up because I saw him on your show saying it.
I'm like, that's very strange.
I kind of knew where he was coming from.
Sure.
Because I knew that he had had experiences, like sexual experiences, when he
was younger.
Yeah.
And he was kind of, I think he was trying to trivialize them and turn them into
humor.
Yeah, I mean, you know, his way of dealing with it or whatever, you know, say
like, oh, it was mutual between me and the priest.
I was molested by a priest, but I was into it, so it was cool.
Well, he's like, I was the predator.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like he seduced the priest, you know?
Yeah.
It's kind of hard for me to imagine a 13-year-old boy, no matter how flamboyantly
gay or sexually aggressive, you know, jumping the priest's bones or something.
Well, I think it sort of gives you a better understanding of how this guy came
to be who he is today and why he so relishes this role of being the contrarian
and being this sort of very difficult to pigeonhole gay man who's very
conservative but yet believes in man-boy love.
I mean, look, this is, uh, if you go back and you read old articles that he
wrote for, um, publications that he worked for in the past, um, there was a lot
of stuff like,
we're gonna take on bullying on Twitter and, you know, we need to make a safe
space for people on, online.
Like, this is Milo.
And now, he's like the biggest troll.
Right.
Uh, I mean, we talked about Milo last time, uh, I was on your show and you told
me, you kind of put the seed in my brain like, eh, he's kind of like, fake.
And the more I've looked into it, the more I have to question whether or not
that shit with the priest even happened to begin with.
Yeah.
Because I just don't, I don't know, I don't really trust the shit that comes
out of his mouth in terms of, like, face value.
Right.
And I think a lot of times when Milo tries to make a point, um, he doesn't
necessarily make it by directly saying it.
He tries to make it through, uh, like, performance art.
Like, when he went on Bill Maher and, um, and, you know, he's, he's doing this
whole flamboyant gay conservative thing because he wants the, the liberal Bill
Maher audience to be like, boo, boo.
Because it's like, ah, look, what hypocrites.
They say they accept gays, but the second you don't toe their line, what they
obviously like is people who toe their line, not gay people.
Right.
Uh, I think that was the point he was trying to make.
I thought it was funny, too, how Bill Maher the next day after, um, Milo's
scandal broke was like, I took him down.
It was me.
Was he, was he saying that?
Yeah, it was like, I took, I took him down.
It's like, dude, you compared to, you said he was the next Hitchens when he was
on your show.
He really, wait a minute, he really said he took him down?
Yeah, he said, I took him down.
No.
I took him down.
Oh, he's a fool.
That's such a foolish thing to think.
I don't, I, you know, what I think is what Milo does, a lot of it is
performance art.
Yeah.
It's a lot of trolling and it's a lot of very calculated stuff designed to sort
of rile people up and get people active and get people to talk about him.
I mean, that's the reason why he does this tour on colleges.
I mean, why, why not do it in the lion's den if you want to get the roars?
I mean, he's doing it like where he feels like this problem is the greatest.
Oh, he wants to stir that pot too.
Yeah.
If he just does it in some club downtown, there's not going to be any protest.
No one's going to give a shit.
There'll still protest, I'm sure, but not like bringing it to their campus.
It won't be like what happened at Berkeley.
Yes.
Yeah.
What happened at Berkeley was just fucking insane.
What's really insane is that, was it the mayor of San Francisco that was
applauding the protest?
Like, hey, fuck face, there was $100,000 worth of property damage.
People were throwing chairs through Starbucks windows and lighting cop cars on
fire.
Like, this ain't good.
There's been articles on, like, the Huffington, I almost made a video about
this article on the Huffington Post, actually,
that was basically like, um, violence is as valid a reaction to Trump as
anything.
It's like, wow, you're literally just advocating for violence, and you think
you're so enlightened.
Yeah, it's completely foolish.
It's like, it goes, once things aren't going their way, it goes against
everything they've stood for before.
What about kindness?
What about compassion?
What about treating people with love?
What about facts and information?
Well, that's okay when they're in power.
Exactly.
That's okay when they're in power.
Yeah.
But when someone else is in power that they don't like, it all kind of goes out
the way out.
Well, it kind of goes both ways, though, doesn't it?
Oh, yeah, it definitely does.
I mean, remember when Obama was in office, and there was people that were
calling him a Muslim,
and they were talking about taking him out?
I ain't fucking, I remember, uh, I heard rednecks, I was living in Louisiana at
the time he was elected,
and I heard rednecks say shit like, man, I can't wait for someone to assassinate
this piece of shit.
And, you know, there's like, they were looking forward to it.
Like, not only did they think it was inevitable he'd be assassinated, but it
was like, yeah, that's going to be a good thing.
That's going to be a good day for America when Obama's finally killed.
And when they say things like that, and you corner them, you go, okay, well,
what's so bad about him?
What drives you so nuts?
He's a Kenyan, he's a Muslim, and he's a socialist.
Oh, socialist.
Socialist, Muslim, Kenyan, communist, secret Muslim.
I would love it if someone pulled off socialism somewhere.
Like, there was like one country, you can go, well, look, those guys are happy.
Look at those folks.
If you look at socialism as like a gradient, then there's plenty of countries
that have like more or less.
More socialist than we are.
I don't think pure socialism is a good idea any more than like pure capi