Name: Joe Rogan Experience #939 - Chris Cage
Uploaded: 2017-04-03T22:53:15.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #939 - Chris Cage' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-04-03. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #939 - Chris Cage' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-04-03. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #939 - Chris Cage

Sound good? Yeah, we're good. Five, four, three, two.
That was like, you didn't do the thumb. I wasn't sure it was their finger
button.
Chris, what's up, man? How are you? Good, man. How are you doing, Joe?
Thanks for doing this. For people tuning in right now, Chris is the author of
How to Hike the Appalachian Trail.
And he's also, I've talked about these on the podcast before, this is his
company.
This is not a sponsor. This is a company, Green Belly Meals, and these are
these really delicious bars that are, they weigh like 50 pounds.
They're like a brick filled with nutrients and food, and they're really good
for people who do this crazy Appalachian Trail thing.
These bars that you sell have become very popular with hunters and people that
like to go on backpack journeys deep into the backcountry.
And I found out about you from Cody Rich, Rich Outdoors podcast.
And that's where I listen to you on his podcast, and that's why you're here.
That's why I got your book here.
Thanks, Cody. Love the podcast.
Yeah, it's a good podcast.
So, what the fuck possesses? For people who don't know the Appalachian Trail,
we've talked about this on the podcast before,
but it's a trail where people walk from Georgia, right, all the way up to Maine.
Or vice versa, but yeah.
Yeah, vice versa, if you want, if you're a madman.
And it takes you, how many months?
Five to seven. Took me a little over six.
So, you just hike for six months.
When you're at, like, month three, do you ever go, like, what the fuck am I
doing?
Long story short, yeah.
And by month three, I was actually approaching wintertime.
And, you know, wintertime camping is just a fundamentally different experience.
So, not only have you been hiking that long, and you're tired, and your body's
just, you know, just done, doing it every day of hiking.
But then the elements of the winter come in, and that was a different ballgame
entirely, you know.
How many people have done this?
Less than 10,000.
That's a lot of fucking people.
Yeah, it is.
That's still a lot. I would have said, like, 50.
There's another thing called the Triple Crown, which is the AT Pacific Crest
Trail and the Continental Divide Trail.
And I think less than 100 people have done all three of those.
The Pacific Crest Trail.
Is that the one that goes from, like, Mexico to Canada?
It's through California.
That's insane.
How long did that one take?
I think, so, the Appalachian Trail is 2,200 miles.
And the Pacific Crest Trail, I believe, is, like, 25, 26, 2,700 miles.
But the trail gradient is a lot easier.
So, I think, like, on any given day, you can actually hike more miles, even
though the trail is longer than the AT.
But I think people actually finish it faster than the AT.
I like how you call it, the AT.
That's inside lingo.
With all you maniacs, all you hiking maniacs.
Yeah.
What the fuck got you into this, man?
I'd say, long story short, Boy Scouts, yeah.
I did, um, I joined Boy Scouts later than most people.
I joined when I was 14.
And, uh, you know, the, kind of the, the pinnacle of the Boy Scout career is
getting your Eagle Scout.
Right.
And I joined with that in mind.
I was like, okay, I'm joining later than most.
I joined when most people are quitting Boy Scouts.
You know, they go from Cub Scouts to, like, 13, and they quit.
I joined, and I was like, all right, I want my Eagle Scout.
And we, you have to, in order to get your Eagle Scout, spend 20 nights in the
woods.
Not consecutively, but you have to, um, get your camping merit badge and get
your camping merit badge.
You have to spend the night, uh, 20 nights in the woods.
So, uh, you know, that was in Georgia.
And the foothills of the, um, Appalachian Mountains are in North Georgia.
So, you know, the, the beginning of the Appalachian Trail is also, you know,
right there.
So, we went on, um, you know, several trips up there in North Georgia, and I
got exposed to it, you know.
And I think the, just the idea of getting on this small trail and, um, you know,
kind of looking down and understanding that this thing goes on for 2,000 more
miles was just kind of like, one, that just seems crazy, right?
You know, there's no way I'm ever going to have enough time or kind of the, uh,
the drive to do that.
But, um, yeah, there was definitely kind of the mystery.
I was like, oh, man, that just seems like an adventure I want to do.
Uh, so, yeah, that was, that was definitely the beginning of it when I was
about 14 years old, going up there and hiking on it for overnight trips.
Now, how does one fund something like this?
Because that, I would assume, you either have to be independently wealthy, or
you have to have squirreled away enough money so you can walk for seven months
and feed yourself in the process.
Or did you work along the way?
I mean, you can't, what do you do?
I think there's a big misconception that, you know, like hiking AT takes a lot
of money, but in reality, it's like, what are your expenses?
It's just food, you know, and then gear ahead of time.
So, um, you know, most hikers are kind of known as the, like, the athletic hobo,
you know, like they are grimy.
They're not spending money on hotels.
There's no accommodation.
There's no car payments.
You know, they're walking.
Um, so you can really eliminate all expenses when you do that.
But, um, I mean, for me, I had, uh, I was an accountant.
So, uh, I'd been an accountant for about two years, and I saved up some money.
And, uh, I basically knew that I wanted to hike the AT, so I started saving up
some money.
But any, any given through hiker, that's what they're called, anybody that does,
um, you know, starts in Georgia, ends in Maine, or Maine to Georgia, anybody
that does that hike in one consecutive run is called a through hiker.
But any, any through hike, I would, I would say it takes about $5,000 from gear
to sleeping in hotels about once a week to resupplying food.
So, if you think about $5,000 for six months of living, like, that ain't too
bad.
You know, you think about $5,000 for six months of living in the real world,
like, I've never lived that cheaply, you know?
Right. Well, it's not that bad. No. Um, but, like, you're saying hotels once a
week, so what would merit a hotel stay? Is it ferocious weather? Like, what?
Um, a lot of things. So, you, you typically are within five to seven days of a
town. So, the trail kind of, you know, goes along the mountains, and then, uh,
about every five to seven days, you come to a trail crossing, which is a
highway, or anything that would lead to a nearby town.
Um, and every five to seven days, you're out of food. You know, that's the
biggest thing that I think pulls you into town, is you need to resupply.
So, you're not out there foraging for nuts and berries, or, or hunting, or
anything like that. You're, you're relying on getting to town, getting to a
grocery store, and, you know, getting all your food.
So, every five to seven days, you go into town, and you get food. It's like, oh,
man, I also haven't showered in five to seven days. I also haven't done laundry
in five to seven days.
And, you know, you're hiking with really one change of clothes. So, you can
imagine if you're hiking 20 miles a day, the grime and the dirt that can build
up.
So, when you come to town, you want to do laundry, resupply food. You want to
stay in a hotel. You want to clean off your body. Your feet are starting to
grow stuff.
You know, you've been sweating, walking through muddy trails. There's just a
lot of grime. When you get to town, it's like, ah, big refresh, you know?
But when you make that big refresh, do you, do you ever go, why am I doing this?
Yeah, it's kind of, it's kind of ironic. You're on, you, you make the intention
of going on the trail to get outside of town and outside of society.
But one of the biggest things you look forward to is getting back into town,
you know? Yeah, and it's kind of, like you said, you know, when you get to town,
it's like, why am I doing this?
You are kind of, I was kind of dreading getting back out on the trail a lot of
times because it was just so, oh man, I have a hot shower.
Like, I shaved, like, it's just so nice.
Yeah, the first time I did any camping in, since the Boy Scouts.
You're a Boy Scout.
Yeah, I was a Boy Scout when I was 13 for one summer, but these fucking inner
city creeps that I went to the Boy Scouts with in Jamaica Plain, Massachusetts,
which is like, now it's more gentrified.
But back then it was kind of a shady neighborhood.
Pick it on you?
Well, they would tie kids up and leave them in the woods.
They would tie you up to your bunk and then leave you in the woods.
They put toothpaste all over your clothes, which you can't get out.
They're just fucking shitty kids.
It was like a total free fall for all.
It was just really dank, because we went to the woods in New Hampshire.
That's where the Boy Scouts would take you up.
And I remember thinking, like, these fucking camp counselors are weird guys.
They're barely paying attention.
And it's basically like all these inner city teenagers.
Street Scouts.
Yeah, they're just running rampant.
Like, there was a rifle range where they would shoot .22s, and there was an
archery range.
And I remember I was at the archery range, and I heard, and I was like, what
the fuck is that?
And they go, that's a ricochet.
And I went, what?
All right, check, please.
And so I decided to just go fishing every day I was there.
I would avoid everybody.
There was, like, all these things on the agenda that you were supposed to do.
Fuck you.
I just took off, and I went and found this pond.
And I would go to that pond every day for the week that I was up there.
My point being, from that time, from the time I was 13, till 2012, I had not
gone camping.
And then I went camping in Montana in October, and it was really cold.
It was like 9 degrees.
And we were out there for 6 or 7 days.
And when we went back, we went back to a hotel.
And I remember thinking, this is the greatest shower the world has ever known.
Like, that feeling, you don't appreciate showers.
Oh, no.
Like, probably nobody appreciates a shower like an Appalachian trail hiker,
right?
Does that make sense?
It's pure ecstasy.
Yeah, it's like a shower's normal.
Like, a normal shower's normal.
But it's like, if you had a shower after you're hiking for 7 days with muddy
feet, and your clothes stink, and everything's gross, and...
Yeah, you need that deprivation to appreciate it, you know?
You do, right?
Because most people don't appreciate showers.
Yeah, I guess it's like the starving kid needing...
You know, when he gets food, he's like, ugh, you know?
Yeah, or like a guy who's just getting out of prison to get some sex.
Assuming you're not getting any in prison.
So, what kind of weirdos do you meet on the trail?
You gotta keep in mind, anybody who's willing to take 6 months out of their
life to go to the woods...
Yeah.
It's gonna be a different breed.
I mean, I think you definitely have your stereotypes.
Some people are out there just kind of for the challenge and the, dare I say,
athletic side of it, but it's like...
There is, right?
There's an endurance side of it, right?
Sure, it's kind of like, I want to power through this and see how much my body
can handle.
You get those kind of hikers, but you definitely get the hippie, drop-out-of-life
kind of guys, you know?
Where it's just like, I just want to get out there and get away from society
for a little bit.
So, that kind of stereotype, you definitely, those are, you can get some weirdos
out there.
Yeah, I would imagine.
Have you ever had uncomfortable moments where you're, like, scared to camp with
people?
No doubt.
There was one time, no doubt, man.
There was Pennsylvania.
So, Pennsylvania, you know, a lot of those ex-coal towns, their economy just
plummeted.
And the AT goes through a lot of those towns.
So, you'd have some people near town going out there for an overnighter, and
they're, what are called shelters.
They're, like, these three-w