Name: Joe Rogan Experience - Podcast In Paradise (Audio Only)
Uploaded: 2017-06-17T07:56:04.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience - Podcast In Paradise (Audio Only)' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-06-17. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience - Podcast In Paradise (Audio Only)' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-06-17. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience - Podcast In Paradise (Audio Only)

Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out.
The Joe Rogan Experience.
Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day.
And we're live in paradise, ladies and gentlemen.
To my left, powerful Ben O'Brien.
Lad, how are ya?
Wonderful, top of the morning to ya.
To his left, powerful Sam Suholt.
The maker of the great boss, the hunting boss.
Jesus.
To his left, powerful John Dudley.
Archer extraordinaire and teacher of many great people.
And to his left, big wave surfer, Shane Dorian.
We're all here in Lanai.
We've been on this epic bow hunting trip.
And we figured we'd grace you fine folks with a podcast.
We've had a couple of beverages.
We're out here enjoying the beach.
And having a great fucking time.
Boys?
Amazing time.
Can't say enough about it.
Are you Instagram storying this?
Of course.
John Dudley's Insta-storing this.
We're going to do what's called a swap cast.
So this will be available on my podcast.
And John will get a copy of it too.
So it'll be on Knock On, which is the premier archery podcast.
If you're not listening, you're probably not really slinging arrows, are you?
Well, they'll sling it.
Just not doing them correctly.
Actually, I had a guy.
He tagged me, you, and Cam in this picture.
And he had eBayed a Hoyt.
And I don't know if you saw that picture.
But he tagged us both.
And he was holding up this bow.
And he said, it's about ready to get effing serious.
I mean, this guy had never shot.
He finally got one off eBay.
The JRE listeners, they are getting into some bows.
So eBay bow prices are going up.
Neighbors' insurance policies are also going up.
There's a lot of dogs that are hiding under the porch.
And based on this hunt, air prices, broader prices, non-prices, luxury prices
are all going up.
So let's explain this place.
Because this place is, Shane, you talked about it on my podcast.
And it is maybe the epic bow hunting destination on the planet Earth.
The cat's going to be out of the bag after everybody hears this, huh?
That's the problem, right?
We should shut up.
We should say, listen, whatever you do, don't go to Lanai.
Because it sucks.
People are not friendly.
The weather sucks.
It's ugly to look at.
And there's no deer.
There's zero deer.
They ran out of beer like two days ago.
They ran out of beer.
Tequila's gone.
And the tequila only comes in once a month.
And they bring in a rowboat.
And it's just in shooter sizes.
Yeah.
And an angry sailor drops it off at the beach.
You have to go get it.
Yeah, it is like one of those tricky things where it's like you have to think,
how much do I really want to talk about this?
Well, if you're a hunter, you appreciate it.
If you're not a hunter, you're thinking, what the hell?
If it's cool, talk about it.
But it's, you know, when I came, when I flew in, I actually asked a guy on the
plane, I said, is there any cool places to like try to surf?
I said, because I'm actually wanting to get some lessons on how to surf.
And the guy said, well, I don't know if you're going to have anyone good to
teach you on this island.
And I said, well, I've got a pretty good guy coming in.
And he said, well, if there are good waves, no one here would actually tell you
where they are.
So it's relevant to what we're doing, right?
I mean, if you have a good thing, you want to tell everyone how cool it was,
this is him, dude.
What's that guy's name?
Shout out his name.
What does it say?
Your friend Gavin.
Your friend Gavin.
Shit's just got manly as fuck.
Hashtag archery.
That's hilarious.
Good for him.
Yeah.
This is the guy with the bow.
Yeah, check him out.
Your friend Gavin.
100% enthusiasm right there.
Your friend Gavin just gave you a big shout out, bro.
Thanks for getting into archery.
That's legit.
Don't shoot your neighbor or his dog.
Yeah, definitely go to a safe area.
Well, that's really a problem.
There's not enough safe areas.
I mean, you would think that L.A., with a place that has 20 million plus people,
plus Mexicans.
I think there's the numbers.
Like how many humans?
There should be more archery spots.
There's a few spots.
There's like maybe in the entire Los Angeles metropolitan area, there might be
four or five.
Impact Archery is a big spot.
You go down there, right?
That's San Diego.
I go to Bob Prom.
Yeah, there's one called Performance Archery.
Oh, Performance.
Where's Impact?
No, it's really good.
What's Impact Archery?
Impact is, crap, I forgot his name.
He's mad.
One spot.
Is that Vegas?
Yeah, that's Bomb Prom.
Oh, Impact is in Big Performance.
Is that the Vegas spot?
This is a terrible time to really pin me down on.
I would Google it, but we're recording this podcast through my phone.
I think that's the place we go to in Vegas.
I'm pretty sure it is.
I don't know.
I mean, feel free to Google it.
Impact Archery in Vegas.
I live in Austin, Texas.
We got one bow shop that's worth anything.
I think you have a new place though, right?
Isn't there a spot?
Archery Country.
It's been around for a while, but it's done a new ownership.
It's pretty crazy.
Pretty good.
But I mean, there's millions of people.
Do you not have the Google app here?
I'm looking at your phone.
I'm so confused because I'm used to my phone.
You just go to Safari and type on the top.
What is this mess?
What is this mess?
Okay.
Impact Archery.
Anyway, anyway.
For those of you listening, we're actually in Joe Rogan's room.
Yeah, it's famous.
Looking out.
There's a pair of binoculars here.
They suck.
Which actually suck.
Yep.
But we're looking.
If we look across that way, like 2,000 miles.
How many miles is it?
6,000 miles to Tokyo.
6,000 miles to Tokyo?
That's what you told us, yeah.
That's 6,000.
I'm so glad we have Shane Dorian in here because he's got the true
the true logistics.
Last night, we had an amazing beach cookout.
I can't say enough about that.
We probably should tell, without really giving a whole bunch of eye details,
how this became a thing.
Like how the hunt became.
Yeah, I can't actually.
Where the conversation begins.
Let me just.
I'm going to play this because.
Let's set the stage.
Let me set the stage.
So here, I'm going to go way back, way before this, what you're about to hear.
And we apologize for what you're about to hear.
Shane and I hunted together in New Zealand last year.
Yeah.
Around this time.
And as we're tooling around New Zealand hunting, he mentions like when we're
talking about
Hawaii, we're talking about elk hunting.
We're just kind of covering all the best spots in the world.
And he said something to me like, lanai is the best deer hunting you'll ever
find.
Like bar none.
There's nothing different.
And you're like bullshit.
And I was bullshit.
I'm checking it out.
I'm checking it out.
And then you said the same thing on Joe's podcast.
And then, and Dudley heard the same thing.
So Dudley and Joe and I were having a nice dinner in Vegas.
Yeah.
A lovely dinner.
Lovely dinner.
With Joe's friend, Andy Stump.
Shout out to Andy for crashing our dinner in the most epic way possible.
So we're having dinner.
Andy orders about, I want to say half a dozen tequila shots.
We get a little bit excited.
And then he orders a half dozen more tequila shots.
And then he finishes her off with six more tequila shots.
So at that point, we came up with this.
This was actually our FaceTime to Shane Dorian.
But we wanted to send, we really feel like.
He wouldn't answer, so we actually recorded this.
We wanted to send a message.
So here was the message to Shane Dorian.
Shane Dorian, we're looking to come to Hawaii.
And experience Axis deer hunting on the nine.
Definitely.
Yeah, I fucking want to do it.
The plan is 6 a.m. to noon.
Axis deer whacking.
Noon, two until we fall asleep.
Food and drink.
Are you in, big wave surfer?
Yeah.
First of all, listening to that while fairly sober, it's amazing how slow my
voice was.
I was clearly, like if I was talking to a cop, if I was a cop, he'd just throw
me right in jail.
You were wrestling those syllables like there were crocodiles.
Crocodiles are too grippy.
It would be more like some sort of a slimy eel.
I had this, someone sent me this message on my phone years ago.
It was a cartoon.
They redid the original, remember the Rudolph cartoon?
Or the original Rudolph thing that everyone would want to watch on the 94th
Christmas?
The claymation was?
Yeah.
Where's the bottle opener?
They, jeez, you're so stressed out.
We have a quarter of a glass.
Just looking for the bottle opener.
It was a clay animation of that Santa Claus being pulled over for drunk driving,
but he had a bunch of coke in his sleigh.
Have you guys ever seen it?
No.
He's like, what's wrong, Othopher?
It was hilarious, but that's pretty much how this whole hunt started.
It was a very...
It was a coke dog.
Santa Claus?
Yes.
Well, we were in Vegas for SHOT Show, and one of the cool things about SHOT
Show is you get down there,
and there's a bunch of other people that are into hunting, and everybody starts
talking.
They're like, man, we've got to do something.
We've got to figure out a hunt.
Look, we've got one more day tomorrow morning.
This couldn't be...
Well, you guys are going to hunt this afternoon.
I can't, because I'm here with the family, and I have multiple obligations.
But next time I might have to leave them behind.
I didn't say that.
Jessica, if you're listening to this.
I think that this is one of the coolest places on earth where you can bow hunt.
It really is.
It's a classic picture.
It's hard to beat it.
It really is.
I mean, you can just empty your quiver in an hour.
It's a good show.
Or be.
It's epic, right?
Tons of deer.
Lots of action.
Perfect bowing terrain.
Yeah, in all seriousness, once you're here, you feel like, man, this is an
important place.
These kind of places are important for hunting.
Yeah.
There's just not a whole lot of spots like this on the planet that are pristine.
I mean, it's hard to get here.
That's one of the beautiful things about it.
It's easy to get to Honolulu.
It's a little more difficult to get to Maui.
It's way more difficult to get here.
Yeah.
And that's what keeps people from coming, I guess.
There's such a cool story, though, to the island.
Yeah.
The island was originally, you know, really the revenue came from pineapples.
And it was a pineapple plantation.
Yeah.
And when we're, like, my knuckles are bloody.
I don't know if you guys are from crawling around.
My knees and my knuckles are bloody.
But everywhere you go, there's, like, little one-inch-wide plastic pipe on the
ground.
That was all the irrigation, all the, you know, all the irrigation for the pineapples.
And he told us today that they actually, they buried that plastic, a lot of the
black plastic
that you see where they've now grounded up because they took the pineapples out.
He said the plastic was seven feet under the top of the soil so that the
moisture stayed
between the top of the soil and the plastic so that the pineapples would
actually grow.
That's interesting because everywhere you walk, you do see that black plastic
kind of popping up.
He said they've tried to get rid of it.
Yeah.
They've tried to get rid of it.
But he said it was seven feet under the topsoil.
Wow.
Yeah.
Pineapple Isle.
That is.
Yeah.
Pineapple Island is what, you know, the reference is for the, you know, for the
island.
Axis meat historically has been argued as the most pure, tasteful meat on the
planet.
It's so delicious.
Just what they serve at the hotel, those, those, uh, Axis meat sliders.
Oh, it's pretty cool because here at the hotel, when they say venison burgers
back in the States,
when they say venison, we're thinking whitetail.
But here when they say venison, it's, it specifically is Axis that's native to
the island and everything
that they're serving here at the hotel is Axis.
Yeah.
But let's, let's talk about that real quick because when you get venison in
America,
you're mostly getting it from New Zealand.
You're getting venison that is commercially raised.
A tremendous amount of elk and venison that you buy in America comes from New
Zealand