Name: Joe Rogan Experience #978 - Judd Apatow
Uploaded: 2017-06-22T20:31:05.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #978 - Judd Apatow' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-06-22. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #978 - Judd Apatow' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-06-22. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #978 - Judd Apatow

so i might plug some dates early do it do it
and we're live judd how are you buddy yeah judd apatow here dude you know sussman
real well
not only do i know your manager sussman jeff sussman when i was a kid i loved
comedy so i got
a job at the east side comedy club at which was in huntington on long island
this is about 83 84
he was the bartender and he used to give me rides home because i lived really
far away and i used
to take a cab home and spend all the money i made as a dishwasher on the cab
ride home wow but i just
wanted to be in the club near comics eddie murphy was coming in it was crazy uh
and i swear to god
this is no bs you have those people in your life that you remember who were
insanely kind and cool
and jeff sussman was like that as a as a young kid i was maybe 15 or 16 i
thought this is the greatest
guy i've ever met he's so nice to me he gives me a ride home he's funny uh and
i'm so glad uh that
he's rich now he's been my manager since i was an open miker yeah he discovered
me as an open miker
in boston who were his first clients uh bob nelson yeah bob nelson at the east
side comedy club
nothing funnier he used to do uh a show once a week and one of the things he
did is he would just turn
on the radio and scan through the channels and do improv based on what was on
the radio so if it was
elevator music he would do a dentist routine if it was heavy metal he would
suddenly do like a heavy
metal guy and it was incredible yeah that guy was huge at one point in time and
then i think he blew
a fuse or something i think he's a very religious person now and he still
performs in branson
it's a nice way of saying he blew a fuse it depends on your view of things i
guess
maybe he's happier than all of us maybe highly unlikely but maybe but god was
he funny i mean
truly as funny as people get and then he built a thing on stage you have to
imagine this he built
like a wall on the stage and in the wall he built two doors and he would do all
these bits where he
would come in and out of doors as different people yeah and then he did a thing
where he would like come
out of the door like run out of one door across the stage and in the other door
and then run out the
that door again as a different person so it looked like he was chasing himself
like it would be like
a gorilla chasing bob but he would just change his body language as he ran in
and out of these doors
it was really creative no one has ever really done stuff like that since even
well something happened
somewhere along the line where carrot top owns props they don't no one does
props anymore you remember
when we were first starting out there was prop comics it was a genre denis miller
used to do props
when he started i heard that he used to put his lips through a 45 record and i
forgot what the bit was
and i i threw a couple of props first few times i went on stage i remember
bringing a light and putting
it to my finger to make my finger look like et's finger i can't quite remember
what the bit was but
that's how little material i had isn't it funny though that that genre is just
sort of dissolved
and it is funny as hell i went to see carrot top in vegas i mean it's a
ridiculous show i laughed my
ass off i brought my whole family we really laughed hard i mean that is a funny
genre of just ridiculous
stupid prop jokes yeah carrot top gets way more shit than he deserves he's very
funny oh no he's very
crazy funny i mean i'm always for the silly guys you know i love you know the
smart people and the
inventive people but the silly guy is also pretty great and it's hard to write
super silly jokes that
make people laugh out loud like there's comedians who are funny and you're like
oh that's funny and then
there are people who actually make you piss your pants yeah and the one thing
that that carrot top did
that made me laugh was he runs around the crowd at some point he's like giving
the crowd shots he's
handing out cups and really fast pouring shots and they're spilling on people
and he's running around
giving people shots and and then he like turned to some lady he's like oh i can't
give it to you
you're pregnant but she clearly wasn't pregnant it was just a chubby lady and
it got really awkward
for her oh no that's always the best when you make that mistake are you allowed
to just give people
shots like what if you have an alcoholic but they're just they're they're sober
but you are like so
influential they go oh fuck it one drink's not gonna hurt and then boom you
just throw their life
off track carrot top wanted it to happen yeah you got to be careful with that
no uh i certainly am not
pouring booze for the crowd but i appreciated it as someone observing carrot
top i appreciate that too
but i would think as a performer you'd have to be really concerned i know too
many people that you
give one shot and they they they van they're doug stampler from house of cards
i maybe carrot top is
getting pre-show releases there could be a whole system there could be of of
how he knows who to give
the shots to yeah he survives in vegas too that does there's not a whole lot of
people that do that
anymore yeah there's like penn and teller and yeah they've been there forever
right but their show is a
magic show right and then there used to be like a lot of residents yes they
were doing stand-up george
wallace rita rudner george george wallace quit doing that right yeah he did for
a long time and
he had enough at some point yeah he explained to me how hard it is like you
have to you have to fill
that room like every night filling rooms let me say as someone who makes movies
and is terrified that
people will show up filling rooms scares me as well like we have a movie the
big sick it opens in new
york and l.a this weekend and then in two weeks it opens around the country it's
a kamail nanjiani
khali hunter and ray romano based on an experience that happened to kamail nanjiani
when he met his wife and
he was he's from pakistan and his parents wanted him to have a an arranged
marriage but he fell in love
with an american woman and then she quickly got sick and had to be put into a
coma and it's this really
hilarious fascinating true story about him hanging out with her parents while
she's in a coma it's just a
very unique story but it works great it's like 98 on rotten tomatoes it's like
one of those gem movies
that comes around every like four or five years what's it called it's called
the big sick and so
like right now i'm terrified you know will people go will you get off your ass
for a great hilarious
movie to go to a theater and it's the same thing with uh stand-up you know now
that i'm doing some
concerts i do you like track like how they're selling it's a scary thing that
they go yeah don't
worry about this city uh they always sell late and then you look at your
numbers for months and no one
bought tickets then like in the last two weeks they sell out or do you just not
tune in at all i try to
tune into as little as i possibly can yeah other than like doing the jokes
themselves doing the shows
themselves you know family hobbies yes i don't tune in anymore i just feel like
there's no reason to
have fuck you money if you don't say fuck you so i'm supposed to be saying fuck
you right now yeah
but not really saying fuck you just there's things to think about and there's
things to not think about
like there's like the things that like you don't have really any control over
yes like whether or not
people buy tickets you're fucking hilarious yeah you're judd apatow what are
you worried about man
you're super successful you've done some of the greatest movies of all time but
the things that
always drive me is the terror of things not working out yeah so that's what
keeps me on my game is
is to be scared that's why i'm going to tell your crowd right now well that's
good because that's one
of the reasons why you're still good but just let me help you out dude you've
you've you have some
of the greatest comedy movies ever just chill out no i can't chill out joe i
can't chill out that's
why i'm going to tell people i'll be at the columbus theater in providence rhode
island july 25th
damn early with the plugs yeah and then uh ridgefield playhouse on july 23rd in
ridgefield
connecticut then i'm at the the wilbur in boston that's one of the great the
best place great great place do you have a
website where people can read all these because they're not going to remember
they're probably in
their car right now they're like fucking the wilbur in boston july 24 the wilbur.com
i don't know
see this is how i do it but your website do you have a website i have no
website i've got nothing
you don't have a website i don't am i supposed to i thought websites my kids
make fun of me if i even
talk about the web like if i say to my kids yeah let's find out on the on the
worldwide web they're
like dad no one calls it the worldwide web anymore my daughter yelled at me the
other day she said dad
no one emails don't email me text me and she acted like i was like talking
about ham radio yeah you
might want to tell your kid to shut the up exactly ridiculous no one emails
everybody i email every
day what are you talking about i guess the kids don't the kids don't have
attachments i think that
they don't need it because there's no attachments my kid never has a pdf to
send that's true and they
don't spell your they don't care every kid spells you are every or there it's
like there yeah and what
how old are your kids i have a 20 i have a nine and a seven girls oh yeah i'm
all girls i'm 19 and 14.
all girls chaos chaos and they all gang up on me and the teen years are rough
they're rough they turn
on you a little bit genetically i think they're supposed to like push for their
freedom and turn
on you for well i also think they're so confused there's so many hormones
raging to their system
that didn't exist just like they're a new person like if you if you stop to
think about how you are
when you're 11 and then how you are when you're 15 it's only four years later
and you're a totally
different human yes i tell them that i say uh you're acting hormonal right now
can you please stop
they can't help we talk about the chemicals i have this book it's called uh yes
your teen is crazy
and then whenever they give me a hard time i just take it out and just start
reading it in front of them
but it is all about how their brain isn't even cooked yet that right that your
brain isn't really
cooked till your early 20s yeah and your impulse control and everything is gone
and that what you're
supposed to do as a parent is model sane behavior and if they if they see you
not lose your
shit thousands of times maybe that will program them to handle problems well
but they are going to
freak out a ton and you shouldn't get that mad out of them at them because they're
not capable of not
freaking out but that is a hard advice yeah it's hard advice and when you get
down to the youngest one
like my my youngest is seven yeah and i'm like don't you have your together yet
come on everybody
else is older than you let's go let's go they don't get a full shot but the
younger kid always
thinks they're allowed to do what the older kids do so it gets scarier as as
you have more kids right
because they go well my older sister does that so aren't i allowed to do that
now and you're like no
you're seven yeah uh yeah it's it's a really weird time i think especially in
california you know uh
marijuana is basically legal it's a it's a difficult debate to have with kids
yeah when it is legal
you can't even pull out the it's a legal card right i'm not worried about
marijuana at what age though
would you not worry about marijuana i'm not worried about it at any age if your
seven year old's like you
know what someone handed me an edible i absolutely don't want my seven year old
or my nine year old
to be smoking pot but i'm not worried about pot i'm worried about alcohol yes i'm
worried about
alcohol and i'm 