Name: JRE MMA Show #15 with Brendan Schaub
Uploaded: 2018-02-14T03:11:50.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'JRE MMA Show #15 with Brendan Schaub' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-02-14. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'JRE MMA Show #15 with Brendan Schaub' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-02-14. Transcript available.

JRE MMA Show #15 with Brendan Schaub

Dum-dum-dum-dum-dum.
I might do a show with Diaz in New York.
Boom.
Live?
Jamie's giving me the not-sure look.
Yes!
You and Joey Diaz talking about doing a show in New York?
Maybe, man.
Where at?
Damn, maybe, really?
Oh, okay, you don't want to talk about it?
Yeah, no.
You need a finalized show.
I got a Joey Diaz story.
We're going to do a show with me and Joey and Yoel motherfucking Romero.
And he's going to talk to him if he gets confused in Spanish.
That's going to be amazing.
You know, because Joey's from Cuba?
Dude, are you kidding me?
So Joey Diaz is going to translate?
It's totally Joey's idea.
It's a brilliant idea.
Bro, I've been talking to him.
I love this fucking guy.
We'd have an amazing podcast.
You and me, you throwing the questions at him.
If shit gets weird, I'll come to him in Spanish.
We'll understand each other better.
It's a brilliant idea.
This is what Joey said.
He said, he goes, tell him that I want to be on his podcast because he has love
for Cuba.
He understands Cuban love.
Love it.
Love it.
All that shit that he was doing to Luke Rockhold after he knocked him out.
Bro, back up.
That's intense.
That's intense.
Give me a few minutes.
You just knocked me into freaking...
That's intense.
Give me a fucking second to get my wits about me and then kiss me on the lips
or whatever
the fuck you want to do it.
His ability to just be calm and then explode is very terrifying.
It's only helped by him telling you he loves you.
He's more terrifying than ever.
It's scary because he's such a nice guy outside.
Dude, he is the nicest guy.
He's very friendly.
Remember the champ, though, was like, oh, yeah, that's what you do.
Whitaker, you know, Whitaker's a monster, man.
You got to go back to that Tim Kennedy fight, though, man.
Talking about Stoolgate?
Yeah, that Tim Kennedy fight was crazy.
It was like, look, I know what you're doing is very slick.
This is very smart.
I mean, this is Angelo Dundee did that to Muhammad Ali when he fought Henry
Cooper in London.
He got cracked with a left hook.
Henry Cooper dropped him.
He was in real trouble.
They cut the glove, baby.
Suspect.
Cut that glove, baby.
We got to get the other pair.
Oh, it's out there in the dressing room.
Be right back.
It's all fair and love to the war, my man.
Yeah, it ain't the right way to do it, but you got to realize that this guy had
gone
through the whole amateur wrestling system as a representative of Cuba.
Matt Brown and I did a podcast last week, and Matt Brown spent—
Love Matt.
He's a great guy and fascinating dude, man.
Intense, smart motherfucker.
Matt died.
People get a chance to—he did.
He died, and they brought him back.
Matt died.
Yeah.
You know, we talked about that.
Really?
I was like, you and Court McGee both have this, like, creepy thing to you
because you both
crossed over to the other side, and you don't give a fuck.
And how was it?
Woo!
Both guys, man.
You got to beat them.
They don't beat each other.
You literally have to take them out.
Or they don't beat themselves, rather.
Yeah.
I mean, Matt Brown ain't beating himself.
Like, he's a human.
What's he doing now?
He is going to fight Carlos Condit.
Oh, that's right.
He's coming back for a while.
He ended on that dope-ass knockout of Diego with the elbow.
Maybe behind the air, but all's fair.
A little bit.
And then, I thought he was going to ride off from the sunset, and now he's
fighting Carlos Condit.
So, he was explaining about his camp that he did in Cuba.
It's an amazing story.
Amazing.
He spent, like, six weeks in Cuba.
Matt Brown?
Yes.
His white ass was in Cuba?
His white ass was in Cuba with the wrestling team for six fucking weeks for one
of the camps,
for one of his fights.
He boxed in Cuba against Cuban boxers, and he wrestled in Cuba.
That's a tough go.
And he lived in a Cuban fighter's house.
They had him there, and they fed him.
How long ago?
Which fight was it that he said?
I'm trying to remember which fight.
If you pull up his record, it was fairly recently.
It's fairly recently.
I'm not old to be doing that, my man.
Dude, he's a bad motherfucker, dude.
He's a bad motherfucker, but it's not...
He's just trying to get better, man.
He's just trying to get better, and that's what he figured was the move.
He has one more left, though, yeah?
Let's be real here.
At least, if he wants to do it.
He's on the Masters Tour.
He knows I love him.
He's on the Masters Tour.
I think he said it was for the Tim Means fight.
I'm pretty sure he said it was the Tim Means fight.
Well, then after that, let's get back to Cuba.
Because after that...
So rude.
So rude.
I'm just saying.
But look, man, he fought Damian Maia, okay?
Who is the constrictor of all constrictors.
Nightmare.
If Damian Maia can get you to the ground, I don't think...
Most people don't understand what that kind of jiu-jitsu feels like, you know?
I've rolled with a few guys that were my size that just went through me.
Like, I realized, like, oh, okay.
Like, Jake Shields is what I talk about him all the time.
Wrestling with him is like wrestling with a chimp.
Carol Parisian, same thing.
It's like holding on to a chimp.
Like, good luck, bitch.
You might look like me.
It's a nightmare.
You know?
It's like you see a guy, like, maybe he does CrossFit.
You're like, oh, that guy looks fucking strong.
No, there's a different...
There's like a Ben Askren strong where it doesn't even look strong.
Just looks like a fit, athletic guy.
And they grab you, and you're like, what in the fuck is going on here?
Why can't I move?
And they twist you up.
It's a different kind of strong.
They move different.
It's a different kind of strong.
Correct.
Damian Maia's got that strong to strong guys.
True.
He does that shit to guys like Carlos Condon.
Correct.
I mean, this is a...
He's the motherfucker of motherfuckers when it comes to strangling people.
It's a terrible fight for Matt Brown.
It's a terrible fight for him.
And what he did to Neil Magny?
He just kept closing, closing, closing.
It was like watching a goddamn snake.
It was like watching a snake take out a deer.
It was terrifying.
Slowly get to that back, just tighter and tighter.
And every time he corrected, it got tighter and tighter.
You see Neil Magny just drowning.
Like, fuck.
He looked like that zebra in the alligator's mouth.
Just like, yeah.
You know, I'll tell you what was equally impressive, man, is Rafael dos Anjos
in Neil Magny.
I was like, holy fuck did I read that wrong.
Me too.
I thought Neil Magny was going to give him a real good fight.
Because of his cardio reach?
Cardio reach, footwork, movement, discipline, sticks to the game plan.
Neil Magny is a difficult guy to fight.
Now, Carlos Condon fight.
Unless you get him down, his jiu-jitsu is Achilles heel.
Well, he, I mean, Damian Maia obviously got him.
But the way dos Anjos got him was like, holy fuck, at 170, dos Anjos is more
aggressive and stronger.
It seems to me, doesn't it seem he's stronger?
He's way better.
He's way better at 70.
He looks healthy, he moves, he has more power.
He's putting his combinations better together.
And he's just on the lighter side of being one of those big guys, so it seems
like he's got more speed.
He reminds me kind of like Robert Whittaker.
To me, the people go, oh, he's a little small.
He's almost perfect.
Perfect.
He's not huge.
He's not muscle-bound.
He can do everything really well.
Whittaker stuffed Yoel Romero's takedowns with a blown-out knee.
He got his knee blown out in the first round and he's still stuffed takedowns.
Whittaker is a fucking savage.
Whittaker's a bad, I'm all up on that Australian train right now.
I think it's another thing where the guy was cutting weight, making 170, just
struggling, man, just struggling.
I really wish the way that Ben Askren described how 1FC's doing it, where they're
doing this hydration test.
Yes.
They're doing a hydration test when you weigh in.
They're doing a hydration test, like, leading up to the fight.
And everybody bumped up a weight class.
And he's now, he's like at 185, because that's really what he weighs.
And not to change subjects, but just, I listen to that Ben Askren, I've always
been a huge fan of Ben Askren.
I think it's such a shame he never fought in the UFC.
I think he beats anyone in the world in the UFC, I really do.
Well, we would like to see, at the very least, I mean, maybe.
If I had to bet on, and I'm a betting man, I'd put a lot of dollars on Ben Askren.
That being said, he's very articulate.
That man needs to do his own podcast.
He needs to do something as far as entertainment.
Well, he does a wrestling podcast.
He was saying he has a wrestling podcast.
I'm just saying, like, there's more he could do.
Yeah, I agree with you.
I thought he was brilliant on that.
No, he's a brilliant guy, and he's just smart and unique, like, as a person.
And you can either appreciate that or not.
That's marketable, man.
Well, it is marketable, in my opinion.
But it might not be, because I'm just coming at it from a point of view as a
fan.
I mean, I'm a fan.
Which is what we want to hear.
Listen, for me, it's a no-brainer.
You want to see the best versus the best.
And he has been able to do weird shit to people.
Hasn't been hit, what, three years?
Dude, he said his last two fights he didn't get hit once.
He goes, I haven't been punched in the face in three years, Joe.
When I hear that, I'm like, dude, that's so marketable.
Dude, it's like the Floyd Mayweather thing.
He's super articulate, super smart.
Speaks well.
Smart dude.
Good looking.
Fucking great guy.
Good dude.
He's a character.
He's a coach, for God's sake, for wrestling.
Kids.
I'm not a promoter.
I'm not a promoter.
I have no say.
And I don't want it.
I don't want it.
I'm too busy.
Let me holler at you, Doug.
Listen, I know you're stressed.
Let me talk to you for a second.
He knows how to promote.
He's a promoter.
I don't know jack shit about promotion.
I could be wrong.
I might just be such a purist that I want the best to fight the best so much I
don't give
a fuck what I look like.
You know the sport.
You know the sport.
Don't sell yourself short.
I guarantee you we could sell Ben Askren.
If you and I put on a promotion, I guarantee you I could sell Ben Askren.
Oh, I guarantee I could get into people's heads why this is important.
It's important if the art form is important.
If it's just important to put on a good show, then you know, you could always
have guys just
stand in the middle of the octagon and throwing lead at each other and let's
see what happens.
There's no longevity in that, but it's very entertaining and there have been
moments like
when Francisco Rivera and John Lineker just fucking threw down each other until
one guy
broke.
That's, I do not recommend anybody fighting like that, but that shit is crazy
to watch.
It's undeniable.
That's going to get the people out of their seats.
That's going to get people freaking out about it.
You got to sprinkle that kind of style in every now and then.
That's fun, but as a sport, we can't do that.
I think, but every now and then when something like that happens, like with
Ricardo Lamas
and Max Holloway, when Max Holloway pointed down at the ground, it's like, come
on, bitch,
a fight he was already winning.
Motherfucker.
That shows you who Max is, man.
That's real shit.
Motherfucker's bad.
Motherfucker's bad.
I'm such a fan.
Me too.
I'm such a fan.
I love him.
With this new Showtime show I'm doing, I interviewed Frankie, and it's tough
for me because I'm
so, I love Frankie, but I'm such like a Max Holloway fan.
It's tough for me not to show the favoritism.
You know what, man?
I might be a-
I love both of them.
I might be a-
I've known Frankie longer.
Yeah.
I know Frankie way better.
I'm a giant Max Holloway fan, but I have to do this thing that I do where I don't
want
anybody to win.
I just want to see what the result is.
See, I don't want anyone to lose.
I'm not good at that.
You're one of the best in the world to do it.
It's still hard, though, man.
I'm not good