Name: Joe Rogan Experience #1132 - Kyle Kingsbury
Uploaded: 2018-06-18T23:21:08.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #1132 - Kyle Kingsbury' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-06-18. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #1132 - Kyle Kingsbury' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-06-18. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #1132 - Kyle Kingsbury

when it comes to defending america it is not enough to merely have an american
presence in space
we must have american dominance in space so important very importantly i'm hereby
directing
the department of defense and pentagon to immediately begin the process
necessary to establish
a space force as the sixth branch of the armed forces that's a big statement we
are going to have
the air force and we are going to have the space force separate but equal it is
going to be something
so important general dunford if you would carry that assignment out i would be
very greatly on
look at mike pence mike pence has this look on his face like i'm going to be
the president
this has gone completely crazy and i'm going to be the president next that's
his nod of approval
look at his face he's got the face of a guy who knows he's going to be the
president like if you
were about to be awarded something like there was some uh something you were
about to get you're
like wow i worked my whole life for this and here it is i'm gonna get that
thing right now i'm gonna be
the president he must be like this guy is never gonna last eight years and for
sure he's gonna win again
i'm gonna be the president so you think for sure he wins again because is that
because whoever the
democrats decide to put in is gonna be an equal turd sandwich again you're a
super smart dude but
you're also a brute you're a big giant savage motherfucker right so how many
people have
underestimated you because you're a big giant savage motherfucker plenty talk
stupid to you
and acted like you were a moron i'd say equal street fights two fights in the ufc
yeah there's a lot of
people right that and just people in general like they'll get snotty i don't
take stevie yeah i'm
good i'm going like my men but i think there's a certain part of us that might
be doing that with him
i don't think he is i think he's really good at winning this is this is this is
not a not like a
an endorsement of him um no caveats necessary i'm horrified by this immigration
policy of separating
children from their parents i think that's subhuman his wife came out and said
that was
bullshit yeah his wife's an immigrant bro his wife barely speaks english it's
chaos right it's crazy
i hate i hate all that stuff these are just families they're just people who
love each other
you got to keep them together if they break the law you keep them together get
them out of here if you
want i mean if you want to send them back to wherever they came from if you're
you're hell-bent on
that but taking them from their kids is subhuman i mean it's beyond it's not us
it's not what we're
doing in 2018 that aside all that aside he's probably gonna win again man i
think he's probably gonna win
again i think he he gets in these confrontations with people and they think he's
adult and i don't
think he's adult i think he's there's no way he could be as successful as he's
been i know he's had
ups and downs and shit like that but like what he just just the way he was able
to dismantle all
those guys in those republican debates he tore him apart torn apart they had no
business they had no
business doing that with him they just were too emotionally tied up in his
responses there was so
much negativity and energy it was like there's all this anxiety like a fight
where a guy's in full
panic you know you've seen like street fights especially guys just go into full
panic or even
just talking in the schoolyard you know like yeah one guy's getting bullied
bullies got the crowd
watching him and the other guy's like well but but you're you're you're you man
yeah and everybody's like oh
that ain't gonna work you know that's kind of that's what the rest of them look
like ted cruz that's
what they all looked like he's just been doing this his whole life he's been
talking his whole life
you know and he's got a lot of supporters and if the economy keeps doing good
man
it's gonna be a hard sell to put some guy in there like bernie sanders who you
know all the
right-wing people think just wants to give away all your money give away all
your money to welfare brats even
the left was protecting against that yeah right because there's still money
money on the left i
should point out i know jack shit about politics this is very important to
point out anybody that
ever says you shouldn't be talking about politics that's crazy because anybody
should be able to talk
about whatever they want but what i shouldn't do is give anybody the impression
that i know what i'm
talking about because i definitely don't like if you had to get me to explain
to you how congress and
the senate works and how long the terms are and what's what's the cat you know
what what they have
to do that'd be a sloppy ass conversation right i'm no political expert you
know like um mike pence is
no mma expert you know what i mean like he probably could tell you who conor mcgregor
is you know like
that's probably like we have equal knowledge in government yeah but still he
might win just in
terms of like definitely good yeah it's a game he definitely could look what
what is it it's a
game it's a game it's a very high stakes gigantic game where you're trying to
win a popularity contest
he won what do you think of the rock potentially becoming president one day
that shit was that
shit blew up and i was like wait a minute now if you look at the current state
and it is a popularity
contest and we want somebody who can literally rock the mic has the gift of gab
yeah but then you also
have somebody who's doing humanitarian shit is as famous as anyone has ever
been highest paid dude in
hollywood he's so nice too yeah you look at that guy and you're like you don't
you don't question his
character no he's a sweetheart yeah he's a sweetheart you meet him in real life
he's like that too oh
he's a big motherfucker big giant motherfucker i think he could do it he could
win he could win
especially if he has oprah's as vp and i'm not even around not saying it's a
good idea folks
not what i'm saying i'm just saying you don't think that the rock and oprah
could win but who would
who would be women would get super pissed off if the rock was the president and
oprah was vp
oprah would have to say look she's busy she's potentially next in line that's
not a bad thing
she's mike pence nodding in approval but she want a lot of people would want
her to be president
oprah to be the first female president to counter like the the first celebrity
president being trump
oprah counters that with the first female celebrity president see that's a big
win would the rock be
vp in that situation it's tough to get the rock to take a back seat yeah i don't
know about that
i don't know about that the rock is he's the rock it's tough to get him to take
a back seat
it would be um fascinating to see what happens next that's what's going to be i
mean how we're
going to try to play this out how people are going to play this out the
popularity contest aspect of it
because it's just okay if it really devolves into that you know it's like and
here's the other thing
how much of his regulations are helping well and what and what do we do now
that has really
up maybe permanent consequences to the earth that's true too right but what
what stuff have they
implemented other than i know they did offshore drilling right that concerned a
lot of people
and it was explained better to me about the the monuments and the private land
i've read a bunch
of different um and public land rather i've read a bunch of different takes on
that and essentially
what they did is bring it back to where it was before the obama administration
changed it so it was
it was listed a certain way and then when the obama administration changed it
they felt that was an
overstep i don't know why and it doesn't seem to be um they haven't started any
like mineral drills or
oil drills or anything in these areas i don't know what they're doing i don't
know i don't know if they're
really just trying to deregulate things more they feel like the government overstepped
their boundaries
or if they really have nefarious ideas they're trying to like figure out a way
to
get some oil out of a salmon river time will tell yeah man i mean there was
that one place we've
discussed it before up in alaska where a lot of people were concerned that
there was going to be some
drilling that takes place near near where salmon live like close enough that if
it up it could destroy
this river when it up that's the probably the best way to say it right because
if if we're if we don't
do anything about it like say if you put a pipeline in the earth and you pump
oil through it and we
don't do anything we just leave it there just leave it there and we don't you
know we don't visit it for
5 000 years what's that going to be like so what does that mean it means you
got to keep fixing it
okay so you put a hole you put a giant tube through the earth and you're
pumping toxic ooze
out of this tube and sometimes it gets into rivers and it kills everything
and there's you want to run this you want to run this tube under the river
okay and then what are you going to do like how many every year every five
years what how long how
often do you check it and when do you replace how long those tubes last i don't
know they got to
check it out i almost got into that what happens if there's an earthquake and
those tubes break
city what how does that work i don't know jack about how they pump the oil out
do you what were you going to say well it's um i mean it's a weird thing if we
know for sure they're
going to one day break like we're making a toxic pipeline we know for sure it's
going to oh the
earth's going to just absorb it right everything fucking roads everything
everything have you seen
them show like a a five-year depiction of what would happen to our bridges if
we stopped painting yeah
i have yeah it looks like it happens overnight wasn't there a show about this
called uh life after
humans or something like that yeah was that on like nat geo or discovery
something like that something
like that yeah there's a bunch of spots uh particularly look at this southern
california
deadliest quake may have been caused by oil drilling oh jesus christ 1933.
doesn't oklahoma now have
a ton of earthquakes from fracking yeah but how could they know this because
earthquakes happen out here
i wonder how they know this
the study written by two leading u.s geological survey scientists scientists in
pasadena shout out
to pasadena and be published in the bulletin of seismic society of america on tuesday
also suggests
that three other earthquakes including magnitude 5.0 earthquakes in 1920 in inglewood
and 1929 in whittier may have also been linked to oil drilling whoa
i don't know maybe maybe we live in california right both maybe both maybe it
gave a little bump but it
was happening anyway the knows but it is um it's weird that's a weird one the
weirdest one for sure
is nuclear power plants that's the weirdest one because they can't shut them
off when you had uh
shane smith on he was talking about that kid that made a nuclear reactor in his
garage yeah at like 17
years old yeah i think he's like 22 now or 23 works for the government what did
they do they tracked him
by the materials that he was purchased well he shut down a city block when he
when he turned but he
was doing like fusion he could do uh what was that he could uh refine uranium
oh jesus like he knew how
to mine it get all the materials and he's 17. that was at 17 he's 22 now or 23.
that's insane but he can
take the used reactors and and basically like a handheld battery like you'd
have on an rc car
that can power an entire city for 10 000 years each one of those what that's
what smith was saying
that's not for me i know i'm saying though that's what shane smith was saying
this guy has that
technology and of course you know they're there to get a little eddie bravo-ish
you know there's
there's big companies that don't w