Name: JRE MMA Show #52 with Michael Bisping
Uploaded: 2018-12-11T23:49:27.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'JRE MMA Show #52 with Michael Bisping' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-12-11. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'JRE MMA Show #52 with Michael Bisping' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-12-11. Transcript available.

JRE MMA Show #52 with Michael Bisping

five four three two one boom and we're live mr bisping how are you sir what's
up joe i'm good
we finally did this man i know we've been talking about it for years feels like
a lifetime you know
it's been quite a while man yeah yeah but uh yeah happy to be here quite the
setup you have as an
englishman please explain to me the hawaiian flag what the is that the hawaiian
flag
straight off the bat i'm like i was confused i was looking at the other day
when max holloway
won i was like if i didn't if you didn't know any better and you looked at that
you're like this is
some strange right off the bat i'm like joe's a smart guy i've seen the podcast
he goes deep on
things i'm like do i need to read some encyclopedias before i come on here and
the first thing you say
is explain the british flag sorry the hawaiian flag what is that well it's like
i can't claim to be
an expert on the history of hawaii i failed that class funnily enough but i
would say that we colonized
it at one point much like america i don't know if you know this uh much like
yeah australia india
yeah australia's got a funky flag yeah you know we like to insert the union
jack in in lots of things
and you think about the size of england how much of the world you guys kicked
ass on it's pretty
goddamn impressive it really is but again i'm no historian no but but no it is
i'm a proud englishman
i guess our ancestors well not my ancestors i'm my ancestors are polish and irish
but uh but yeah
the british they did okay did a lot of got a lot done they did they did you
know i was at a um
they did a lot of terrible things i'm sure over the years a little bit yeah i
remember once i was in
in canada at uh at a party of all things about three o'clock in the morning as
well you know as one
does and um i walk in and some guy starts going crazy at me the things that the
british have done over
the years you should be ashamed of yourself and he was causing a huge scene
really screaming at me
right and i mean going crazy and i'm like dude what the nothing to do with me
he's like you should
be ashamed so in the end i said well where's your family from and you're not
going to believe this
he said mongolian germany oh i'm like you're a german you're a german and you're
giving
me about my heritage okay buddy i suggest you shut the up that's pretty
hilarious because when you think about the history the germans way more recent
oh yeah just a
little bit just a little bit the english stuff is in the past come on that's
like with swords and
arrows and yeah robin hood times come on come on you know do you like living
over here yeah very much
so you know i mean of course you know you miss uh you miss home you miss
friends and family certainly
um you know as you get older and your parents get older you know you you do
think about those things
but yeah it's great it's great place to live your accent has tamed itself a bit
well when you go back
home do they give you about it i get all the time yeah all the time they're
like what's this weird
accent mike um and it's like this i'm intelligent enough to adapt to the
surroundings that i'm in
you know like i'll now say tomatoes instead of tomatoes because i don't want a
cute little back
and forth for five minutes with the waitress do you know what i mean i just
want to order my breakfast
to go about my day oh my god you're english you know what i mean so i'll say
tomorrow i'll say
coffee but when i go back home it kind of you know and then working on fox um
they worked on me for a
while they're like mike we like what we think we like what you're saying the
problem is we can't
understand what you're saying it seems like it's good stuff there's lots of
energy there but uh
you gotta slow down over pronounce your words so uh so yeah it it is a little
bastardized have
you thought about doing commentary on ufc cards have you done any of those yet
i've just done um
the what is it the content the series that's it yeah that's it but but i think
it's well i know it
well should be coming up just negotiated a deal for it so great with zach so
that's good yeah yeah
yeah you know because you're really excellent as an analyst well thank you very
much i appreciate it
enjoy your insight when you're on the panel that panel's great that is one of
the best things ufc's
done yeah is do that post-fight show because when the fights are over you're
sitting around going
fuck holy yeah and then to have you guys break it down and then break it down
beforehand as well
but break it down afterwards i really do enjoy that oh thank you very much yeah
the guys do a good
job um yeah it's fun you know i mean it's it's nice to be involved with the
sport obviously as a martial
artist as a fighter and then now retired to still you know still have a little
hand in there it's it's
nice yeah but you've made a smooth transition from being a fighter to to
retired it seems at least from
the outside looking in that it seems fairly smooth it's like some guys have a
rocky road it's it's hard for
them well it's because um you know i mean i i i want to tell the truth while i'm
on here so so i will
tell the truth but you know i had eye injuries yeah you know so you know every
from from when the eye
injuries happened in 2013 i always felt like i was on borrowed time so i was
conscious of trying to set
myself up outside of the octagon where a lot of fights don't have that luxury
you know i'm thinking
it could end at any moment so i was um actively pursuing a life outside the octagon
a career outside
the octagon so then when that day came i was good you know excuse me some
carbonated energy drink that
shall remain nameless but uh but yeah so uh so yeah no i i i was working on
that for a while
and yeah you know things are going well you know there's quite a lot of things
going on so uh yeah
you do that podcast with lewis gomez got the podcast believe you me uh i've got
a company called play
lime what is that it's a uh it's a gambling it's fancy sports but it's fancy
sports simplified basically
it's kind of like a sports lottery so if we were focusing on the ufc who's
gonna win what round how many
takedowns we do five stats you hit them bang on you get a billion dollars we
had the analytics
groups at harvard and yale come up with a league so the top 50 people split
everything you get a
billion you get a billion dollars a one buh a b boom billion dollars baby and
we give away a million
dollars every single day playline.com boom there it is there it is prizes
available in our first year
and it's blowing up it's blowing up big time we're just about to sign a deal
with a couple of major
sports franchises to be their official game so uh so that's going really well
um so it's uh essentially
like a fantasy uh martial arts thing like you just pick no it's nascar football
mma the the beauty of
play line is you can set a play line to anything like we can set a play line
how many times is bisping
gonna burp how many times he's gonna get up and have a piss how many times is
rogan gonna roll his
eyes at mike you know no you know what i mean you can set it for anything so it's
very applicable uh how many
times how many likes is kim kardashian gonna get in her next post you know what
i mean so it's um
yeah you'll be getting a lot of traction it's doing really really well very
proud of it i would think
if it's a billion dollars i would think it'd be like some guy richie movie
where some mobsters would
get together with some fighters yeah this is how we're gonna do it see trying
to go down three times
okay i've never heard it uh an english gangster sound like they're from like
1920s chicago see see this is what
i'm gonna do see what i do um but yeah yeah i guess no is that hasn't nobody's
cheated yet well
you know the reason why i say that's totally undermining the system joe really
appreciate it
the reason why i say this is because this is what happened with professional
pool professional pool
had a line at one point in time in vegas casinos and the pool players all got
together and said listen
let's put all our money on this guy who's a 10 to 1 favorite to win it or 10 to
1 underdog to win it
and we'll all make money and so they all dumped and this one guy i think his
name is mike lebron
he won the whole thing the only way you could do that is if there was no stats
no stats right so
if it was a game of basketball everyone would just have to stand there and do
nothing right which
i would assume i mean i don't know too much about basketball but i would i
would assume athletic
commissions referees people get somebody would say something if everyone was
just standing there doing
nothing well they did with pool they you don't can't gamble on pool anymore oh
really cool players
are too shady yeah well they are they're shady they're shady guys yeah you know
anyone that plays
pool in england it's because they spend so much time in pubs exactly you spend
so much time in pubs
you're hanging out with some interesting characters yeah you know yeah unsavory
characters dude you you
started at ufc ultimate fighter season two how crazy three what's you season
three three what what
season are they on now like 90 or some shit like what are they on i think they
just did 28 28 but
that's crazy but that's only us they have the the brazilian one they have the
australian diego
sanchez is still going on it that's what's insane that's impressive season one
he's a maniac he's
god bless him you know good for him good for him and he won recently which is
impressive no i know
and he fights in a way that isn't conducive to a long career no but he's had
one my word it's
incredible it really is he really is he's a warrior such a character too oh
dude he's out of his mind
in a good way i mean you know i mean that as a compliment i do as well yeah
yeah no he's a maniac
but uh i mean that guy season one and still still going strong no i know i know
crazy crazy it's been
a long ride for myself as well but uh enjoyed it enjoyed every minute of it it
was great nice to nice
to leave having won the title though right oh 100 oh yeah how nice is that to
cap it off because you
had such a long career man i mean you fought the best of the best and for you
to cap it off knocking
out luke rockhold and then having that oh no one could take that away from you
forever no for sure
you know i mean i was talking about this recently i'm filming a documentary
called built for this
and it's about my career and they were asking about that you know how would you
feel excuse me
this carbonating energy drink that shall we name nameless energy drink um is it
called creature or
something like that creature or demon uh something like that mythological scary
where was it yeah
scary scary monster there you go um no no they were asking about my fight
career how would i have felt
had i not won the belt and you know i mean it would have felt like it was
unfinished business i wouldn't
have been quite as content as walking away when i did had i had i not won the
belt other than winning
the belt what and winning the ultimate fighter i'm sure but what was your most
satisfying victory was
it kung lee no no i don't know my most satisfying victory in my word oh anderson
silver anderson so
yeah that was a big one for me yeah that was a big one too because of the the
cheap knee
it was cheap it was glad you said that it was cheap i mean i'm a giant anderson
silver fan yeah
everybody is you don't get any bigger anderson silver fan than me but you didn't
have your
mouthpiece you were pointing to the mouthpiece you were separated and you took
a pause and you
thought the referee was going to separate you and give you back your mouthpiece
and anderson comes in
with the knee well i know the rules there has to be a lull in the action for
the referee to step in
you know and i'm backing up and and we're not engaging in blows to me that's a
little in the
action yeah so i take that moment to point down over here and say my mouthpiece
and as i'm down
th