Name: Joe Rogan Experience #1317 - Andrew Santino
Uploaded: 2019-06-26T06:24:15.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #1317 - Andrew Santino' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2019-06-26. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #1317 - Andrew Santino' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2019-06-26. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #1317 - Andrew Santino

do do do do do do do hey santino yeah good to see you brother how are you good
man um the charcoal
it's you that's me i sent santino a picture i'll send it to you jamie you seen
it so fucking funny
i want residuals on that shit yeah what is it called lucky dev or bro it's you
it's me that's
it's you with a steak devil something something i put it up online i was like
this is so fucking
funny this is me with my own charcoal company called uh if you're in the market
for some
charcoal man oh jealous devil that's what it is that's so me with that beard
fucking steak down
there with a with a knife jealous devil barbecue is the only truly manly way of
cooking like nobody
brags about having a baker's hat on yeah there there is there it is all natural
hardwood hardwood
charcoal hardwood charcoal bitch lump there is nothing man do you do the uh do
you smoke you
smoke or just just use a traeger you know what that is no it's like a pellet
grill oh yeah yeah
a pellet grill right yeah pellet grills are shit man it's so easy and then do
you finish in a skillet
or no yeah that's the way to go right baby with beef tallow oh what is that
what is that and you know
what else i use minced garlic and uh rosemary i i put rosemary in the in the
like cast iron skillet
with the beef tallow oh yeah it's like an extra an extra i learned that in an
italian restaurant
i was gonna say what are you guys doing he's like we use a rosemary rosemary
rosemary on the
rosemary it's a wonderful ribeye if i go to an italian restaurant the dude
talks like that i am
excited yeah i'm stoked i'm more pumped yeah it's just a regular person even if
they're nice i'm
disappointed yeah yeah it's like the nicest waiter ever i'm like dude you seem
like a great guy but
damn i wish you were from italy yeah he's like i'm just whipping you guys up
some fredicini alfredo
you're like nobody from italy back there man you malibu fuck
that's a weird one right it's like italian restaurants particularly like i go
to a greek
restaurant i would hope the guy would not have an accent i don't yeah i don't
need him i wouldn't
care if he could or he couldn't as long as i can understand him that's great
right but i don't
require it nah but i require it at an italian restaurant yeah because it's just
there's something
about it that's different and then everywhere else mexican you know what i mean
everything else is
mexican yeah chinese made by mexicans chinese people making mexican or mexican
people making
chinese food it's always one of those weird things you're like huh okay is this
gonna it's just gonna
measure up though like at those um you know those those chain places yeah those
chain uh what's
called pf chang's no pf chang's is not as much that's like a restaurant like
you order it pf chang is
pretty fucking good but that's all mexicans cooking that shit probably there's
no like chinese guy who
greets you at the door you're talking italian foods like have you ever been to
a buca de beppo
like that's oh bro yeah that's uh yeah that was in college that was my job is
valeting a buca de beppo
if you want like straight up filling old school italian food that's so much bro
they will hook you up
they try to fucking kill you wait a minute buca de beppo is the chinese food of
italian places
do you know what i mean like how chinese places give you way too much food but
you can eat buffet
50 pounds of fucking pasta when you go to buca de beppo they bring that
aluminum tin out with
the rigatoni and you're like who the fuck are you for a full fucking kingdom
who can eat you and your
servants listen this is silly yeah it's absurd you're turning me into an
asshole and that's also
rigatoni like that kind of food you keep going you keep going even when it
hurts you don't stop like that carb when that when you're eating like a good
linguine with clam
it's like oh why are you eating it's so gluttonous it's like
the chewy goo that has no nutritional value is going in your stomach like oh it's
so good you can't wait for mom mom look it's mixed in with some sauce and to
give the illusion of healthiness yeah oh there's green a little bit of green on
it and you're just like uh
when your body's trying to process it afterwards like oh you feel fucked up
sometimes when you eat too much pasta you feel like drunk i feel like stoned or
drunk because i'm broken my body's just like all your resources slamming all
that shit down yeah it's so fucking gross
bro everybody remembers from like time we were kids apparently someone told me
that you don't get a significant enough amount of tryptophan from turkey for it
to put you to sleep yeah i've heard it's bullshit i want to know if that's true
though you know if that's true so i've been told that there is
tryptophan there's always tryptophan that's been in turkey but uh the the
running joke is that after
thanksgiving dinner you pass out but that's actually because of all the other
shit you're eating
fucking mashed potatoes tons of carbs a fucking bret hawaiian bread rolls carbs
yeah contrary to popular
belief eating turkey isn't the main reason you feel sleepy after thanksgiving
feast the oft repeated turkey
myth stems from the fact that turkey contains an amino acid tryptophan which
forms the basis of brain
chemicals to make people tired but it's not true that's but it's not i mean it
does but it's not the thing
that knocks you out being a fat fucking sitting on your couch and drinking 40
beers is what makes
you sleepy yeah so it says tryptophan is a component of the brain chemical serotonin
which gets converted
into the well-known sleep-inducing hormone melatonin and poultry and many other
foods also contain
tryptophan chickens got similar amounts yep gram for gram cheddar cheese
actually contains more tryptophan than
turkey does suck on that cheese heads yeah cheese folks it's just being a glutton
man yeah you just become a fat piece of
shit and you just feel like you're supposed to keep eating and eating and
eating there's an interview
with cat williams who's sitting in the back of a limo i talked about this with
miss pat where he talked
about not eating before shows and i was like he's right like why would i eat
before shows and it made
me realize oh eating before shows is a terrible idea yeah because anybody's got
to process all that and
you come out like half-assed we don't know we never eat before shows and we do
shows we never eat
before shows after shows is actually when it tastes the best i'll have some
fruit i'll have a little bit of fruit
before a show i'll have a little something like a little baby thing i don't
mind some fruit because
you have some fruit it's like you're getting some carbohydrates you're getting
some sugar you're
getting some fiber it's super easy to digest like melon you know melon your
body's just you could lift
you could to eat melon and then do a sick kettlebell workout like it's not
gonna you no like melons
easy it's a little baby sugar rush too that probably helps your energy a little
bit your body just you
mash it into mush so quick and it just goes sliding down there your body's like
oh we got this we should
we should do that we should do the tired tour where we just eat a huge meal
before we get on stage and
see what see what comes out of that shit compare melon to like a stromboli like
one of those ridiculous
and you take a couple of bites of that and you're just like oh
and you just keep going but if you looked at like the size of what you would
eat on one of those
motherfuckers a lasagna look at that shit a buka de papa lasagna you want the
layers and layers we
got it that will take you down son you ain't doing no crosswords after that
cheese pasta
cheese pasta pasta cheese sit the down there's more cheese coming you ain't
playing no puzzles
i would wonder the brain activity slows down so much more like i wonder what
the active
level of brain activity is when your stomach is oh yeah you're useless i feel
like you lose like 80 points
of iq you have just enough to get around like someone should come to you and
try to get you to
do things yeah you know like you'll sign off on stuff you'll change your
marriage license
like just get fucking leave me alone what do i gotta write right there fellas
you want your wife to
sign a prenup go ahead and fatter out on puka de beppo lasagna and then she'll
sign whatever the
you want give up i don't think i could like when i drive home after having a
full meal i feel more
up and like out of it than if i have a couple of drinks it well you're
definitely slower oh yeah your
reaction time would be slower if you were full and you were driving just like
it's just like you're
tired when you're full and you don't talk as well you know articulate things as
quickly yeah it's like
it's got to be related that's like i was part i worked there for four years
that's why i know so
much about it but part of the thing you're supposed to sell at the end of the
meal is like limoncello
or espresso because it's supposed to be like a digestive i don't know if it's a
diuretic yeah sell
pitch but maybe it is something to that where it helps you digest a little
better and that's why they all
in italy they all they all do it as a end of the meal to clear you out a little
bit
hey the acid is going to help you break down some that's where the espresso
kicks in yeah and the
the chairs in italy turn into toilets you know that right
in brazil when you go to those uh chuhascarias um they they have this delicious
dessert that has a
papaya in it and it's like a papaya smoothie kind of it's like a blended papaya
drink and like a dessert
rather and they they have that specifically because the enzymes and papaya help
break down the meat
oh it does yeah it's wild and it's fucking delicious dude but it's uh uh
speaking you know
what's that chill what's that chain that brazilian chain uh fogo de chau yeah
that's it right there
dude sun that will fucking rock you at the end of a good meal is there booze in
there you can get
booze they have a guy who comes by i usually say no because i'm not a drunk but
you i would say pour it yeah
so that's the first question i ask is there booze in there it's good with booze
it's good without
booze too it's just good i love those places i went there with that uh ufo guy
bob lazar oh you did
lazar went there with you yeah yeah yeah and uh schultz andrew schultz one of
me too yeah and jeremy
corbell the um the guy who uh made the documentary we all sat around talking to
him that lazar dude freaked
me the out man he's a freak out made me want to move i you know i had no
indication that he's full
of i mean i was zero meter here's the thing man when you've told a story for as
many years as many
times as he did it's uh it's super hard to be consistent if you're just making
everything up
it's super hard to to to have things that you're saying back then that
everybody says don't even
exist right eventually turn out to be true it's very difficult to deny that
like these are parts
of his initial story his initial story had something to do with this thing
called element 115
which uh most people i mean they didn't even recognize that it actually existed
until much
later right that's a big feature of it when did he start talking about it once
you're talking about
the 80s yeah that was 70s 80s right a long time ago but it's about look i don't
know enough about
elements and the table to understand it you're talking to a state school kid we're
both stupid you're
probably more educated than me though but at the end of the day this guy is
obviously smart as
and he's a scientist that definitely worked at los alamos lab there's there's a
record of him there
right and they tried to deny that and they tried to erase it that alone tells
me just the fact that
they tried to say that he didn't exist he never went he never worked at los alamos
lab that's a
that's freaking me that's huge freaky yeah in the 1980s you don't think they
could just erase your past
right you don't t