Name: Joe Rogan Experience #1371 - Andrew Santino
Uploaded: 2019-10-29T10:00:03.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #1371 - Andrew Santino' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2019-10-29. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #1371 - Andrew Santino' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2019-10-29. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #1371 - Andrew Santino

two one
hi andrew santino what's up mr rogan this is still sober october still sober
you can have real drinks
no i'm gonna have i'm not gonna have real drinks i'm gonna have this some of
this cheers i'll have
some of this zero zero it's good right oh yeah it's pretty good
i know you want to get up but you can't how about that i'm not gonna man how
about that i'm not
gonna i need i need time for my stomach to clear up you could do sober october
no you know i can't
do that you can't do it no a month how about a week i could do a week i could
do sober week
so you could do the first week of sober october yeah the reason maybe like the
first week this
year next week next year you do two weeks if i'll do i could do so i could do a
sober i could do a
sober month but october sucks for me it's my birthday in october so i don't
want to take it off you know
also i like drinking too much you like it a lot i can stop i could stop weed
and yeah anything else
no i can't do you want to drink no i got booze right over there no my tummy's
so sensitive still
yeah you're all mess let's tell everybody what happened so uh no uh offense to
hilarities which
is a great comedy club we stopped there uh saturday night after our show in cleveland
we went over to
say hi to our friend jesse may peluso who was headlining there and what was the
dude's name
andrew andrew don't i don't remember funny guy anyway um so we say hi to them
and they they
graciously the owners of the club uh graciously asked if we were hungry we said
sure we could eat
they have a nice menu why not so i had the prime rib it was excellent and you
had a steak with some
vegetables that's right i had a bunch of vegetables on the side probably around
midnight
and then uh we get on a plane at like six in the morning we are uh flying back
home and i pass out
and then the lady wakes me up it's like a movie the lady wakes me up and then i
look over you you're
like dude i'm not good i'm not good i'm not doing good what's the matter what
happened like we we had
walked through the airport cracking jokes like we always do having a great old
time everything seemed
normal he didn't seem sick at all he fell asleep tell everybody what happened i
fall asleep i woke up
like in fight club when you're like when he wakes up he's like on the plane
like my breath caught
myself and i sprinted to the bathroom and i was like so out of it and i think
the head rush had got
me all up and i sat down and i blacked out and passed out for a second and i
woke up and i'm throwing
up i mean i am hurling you woke up throwing up throwing up just like as i wake
up i'm spitting
and i could and i'm like holding on to the sides like i can't believe what's
like i can't i'm so
disoriented and i walk out and i grabbed the flight attendant and i was like is
there a doctor on the
plane like i'm something something's wrong like i don't feel good and right
then my stomach was like
burbling again and she's like oh my god you're like pale as a fucking ghost and
i was like
always i'm like i'm like this bitch this is what i look like he's a ginger she
goes go sit down
i'll get somebody this nurse was on there this guy garrett super nice and he's
asked he was he was
right in front of us like a row up and he asked to switch seats with joe and he
sat with me and i was
hurling dude i dude for the first time in my life i puked in those bags you
know when you're like nobody
pukes in those fucking bags i did i watched i puked in that fucking bag like
three times and then he
saw undigested food tons of undigested and i was pretty sure it was food
poisoning because i've had food
poisoning before and sometimes it comes on pretty quick you knocked it on the
nose well that's what
he thought it was too he goes he was asking me he's like what did you have last
night i said i had
two drinks at the show and i had a couple of beers after with jessa may and her
friend and uh he was
like did you take any street drugs yeah that's what he said he said street
drugs did you take any back
alley drugs i said no man i swear to god he thought about ditch any ditch drugs
you take any ditch
drugs any forest drugs any sewer shit so i told him the truth i said dude i
didn't take any drugs last
night and he was like okay and when he told me he looked in there and he goes
oh you have undigested
food which means your body's rejecting it without processing it so it must be
you got a bug of some
kind because dude i was i when i talked when i grabbed you and i go bro
something's wrong like this
is not it was very nerve-wracking because i was out of it yeah i passed out and
i was so confused i was
like how but you were okay yeah i'm like did he have a stroke dude it was
creepy i i fell for a second in
the bathroom like something medically was really really wrong if my instinct
was oh i must be like
sick or something's wrong but then when i kept like having this urge to to yarg
i was like something's
really going on like i was assuming that it was the vegetables because a lot of
times people get it from
poorly handled salad yeah yeah people get it was bad if they don't wash the
leaves and everything real
good people can get food poisoning from salad it's apparently one of the most
common ways people get food
poisoning was from salad and chips out yeah well dude it was just you know and
the guy was so nice
he sat with me the whole time but he could tell he's like are you doing okay
and every couple of
minutes i'd feel like i had to like when water can't stay down i think that's
the key when you're like
chugging water chugging water he's like don't chug too fast i'm like why he's
like because and then
i'm just like he's like because of that bro you're fucking puking up water but
uh the old red feels
fine i feel fine now i would just that me up bad tear and it's five hours from
cleveland so
it wasn't a wasn't a quick jump food poisoning is sketchy sucks dude sucks it
was awful man four or
five times in my life it's never never good that's the second time the first
time i had it was in
college it was the worst thing ever it was way worse this was both ends this is
when your mouth and
back door when you're it's like a cartoon i had in college from movie theater
popcorn what that's real
shit movie theater that's real shit dude here's how we knew we me and this
other dude we had totally
different meals all day and this other friend of ours too and uh long story
short whatever we both
woke up sick the same time like in the middle of the night and we had asked
when i went to the doctor
finally the next day because i was sick all day and the doctor was like would
you eat i detailed and he
goes oh yeah sometimes the butter can be spoiled or rotten oh actual butter
yeah oh maybe that's why
they use that fake ass butter hell yeah what is that fake ass butter made out
of i don't
fucking know what the fuck is movie popcorn theater butter made out of if it's
not real butter because
most places don't have real butter jamie's laughing at my sicknesses no movie
popcorn what do you think
it is it's like gotta be some weird vegetable oil or something yeah nasty it
was it was weird yeah
butter flavored oil yeah butter flavor oil it's not butter what is that margarine
well they say bad
that stuff is for you people used to think margarine's the way to go like if
you butter's terrible for
you have some margarine margarine's non-dairy it was horrible for you but all
processed oils you know
what they're finding out from those fake meat burgers they're possible rats
they're giving them liver cancer
pull up what what it what the study was yeah yeah yeah um one of those is
beyond meat or impossible
meat or not really meat whatever the it is yeah not meat but looks like meat we're
trying
to make it look like me it's processed oils with grill marks on it why do they
do that weird it's
mostly oils yeah it's like oils from vegetables it's very strange a lot of soy
and like that
eventually like those processed vegetable oils are terrible for you yeah you
know what's good for you olive
oil that's a good vegetable oil avocado oil is good for you but like all that
other shit like canola and
all that stuff is my question is it because it's not naturally occurring
feeding studies suggest the
impossible burger may not be safe to eat scroll down this is gmo science it
says hold on a second
make them a little larger rats fed gin rats what are you doing what's going on
with your trying to make
it bigger and it's just going up rats stop stop moving go back jesus jamie stop
go back go back
it's on back no no it's not there thank you thank you rats fed the genetic no
the text there
buddy rats fed the genetically modified yeast derived protein soy whoa say that
word leg amaglobin no
it sounds like an irishman oh danny danny he's a good boy he's the burgers key
ingredient developed
unexplained changes in weight gain and significant signs of toxicity why did i
put the word significant
in there wasn't even there it felt right it did i'm uh i'm an editor okay unexplained
changes in weight
gain and signs of toxicity and it said the impossible burger is a plant-based
burger the key ingredient
which is a protein called soy legmoglobin slh derived from genetically modified
yeast a rat feeding study
commissioned by the manufacturer impossible foods found that rats fed sl each
developed unexplained
changes in weight gain as well as changes in the blood that can indicate that
the onset of inflammation
or kidney disease as well as possible signs of anemia holy yeah impossible
foods dismissed these
statistically significant effects as non-adverse or having no toxicological
relevance that's it's so
funny you can just dismiss things they just they did a real study and they're
like not real well
they're dismissing it because it's not convenient i mean it's real simple i
mean you do rat studies
doesn't necessarily mean it transfers to people but the that stuff is okay what's
the ingredients
let's let's find out what the yeah that's what i want to know because that's
not the only thing that i've
read i've read i've read things by actual nutritionists they're saying look you
want to be on a plant-based
diet you should eat real foods you can eat healthy on a plant-based diet you
can eat real vegetables and avocado
and you know there's plenty of good stuff to eat coconut oils all this stuff is
healthy for you
but when you start making shit look like meat that's when shit gets squirrely
because you're finding all kinds of
you're you're you they're adding all sorts of processed food why'd you take
that off the screen i don't want
to be distracting while you're talking oh no it's okay so what what the is in
there top five ingredients
calories four ounce serving which is pretty skimpy clocks in at 240 calories
that's in the range of a
beef burger depending on fat content yeah cholesterol the impossible contains
no cholesterol to compare
a regular beef patty contains about 80 milligrams scroll up scroll up scroll up
scroll up scroll up
fat 14 grams includes eight grams of saturated fat which generally considered
less healthy than
unsaturated fat that's not true it's it's entirely dependent upon the source
and it's entirely dependent
upon like how you're eating like what you're eating yeah like it's the idea
that saturated fat is bad for
you this has all been debunked this is comparable to a beef burger mostly due
to the coconut oil which
is healthy for you fuckers this year the impossible replaced a portion of the
coconut oil which is the
highest in saturated fat god damn it with sunflower or which is way shittier
for you which is an unsaturated
fat god damn this you know talking to nutritionist on this podcast has been so
enlightening but so
confusing when you see the way that people still want to eat low fat you know
and they like they don't
understand like fats are important your body needs them they're good for your
brain they're good for
everything omega-3s omega-6s that was the revoluti