Name: Chuck Palahniuk Shares the Strange Story of His Father's Murder
Uploaded: 2021-10-27T17:49:48.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Chuck Palahniuk Shares the Strange Story of His Father's Murder' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-10-27. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Chuck Palahniuk Shares the Strange Story of His Father's Murder' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-10-27. Transcript available.

- The Joe Rogan Experience.
- But has there been anything in your life
that was so horrific that they couldn't imagine telling you?
- You know, except for my father's murder, not really.
- Maybe that was it?
- Maybe that was it, but boy,
that doesn't seem like it's big enough.
I don't know.
- How was your father murdered?
- Dad, dad was murdered in May of 1999.
He had answered a personals ad
for a woman who was looking for a boyfriend.
And the ad was headlined Kismet.
I believe that's the Arab word for fate.
And dad met with her.
Her name was Rita.
She was a lawyer.
She had worked in the prison system in the Midwest.
And dad was really, really taken with her.
She was really bright and really smart.
And she had an ex-husband who had sexually abused her daughter from a different
marriage.
And they were pressing charges against his ex-husband and he was gonna go to
prison.
And she had met him while he was in prison and she was doing legal work.
And she had helped him get out of prison.
So she helped him get out of prison.
She'd married him.
He had abused her daughter.
She divorced him.
She was prosecuting him to send him back to prison.
Then she met my father.
And this ex-husband had said that if he ever caught her with another man, he
would kill them both.
So my father was going to pick her up and she was gonna stay at his house in
the mountains until the time of the trial.
And as he was going to pick her up, he was going down this mountain road on his
property and a giant boulder broke free and it rolled down the hillside and it
blocked the road.
He couldn't get out.
So he spent the day with this lever forcing this boulder off the road.
And then he took a couple extra hours and he made a sign that said Kismet Rock
so that he could label this boulder as a kind of landmark.
But when he brought her back to sequester her and he cleaned the house
incredibly, the house was just neat as a pen and stocked with all this food.
And, you know, he really planned to have this fantastically sort of idyllic
time.
sequestered with his new girlfriend and he labeled the rock to surprise her and
then he went to pick her up.
And when he went to pick her up, the ex-husband showed up and he shot my father
and my father and the woman took refuge in her house.
And the man set fire to the house and the house eventually collapsed and the
coroner says that they were both
dead before the fire got to them.
And the coroner says that because of the angle of the shot, my father probably
took about 20 minutes
to die because the bullet ruptured his diaphragm.
So with every breath, he would have been accumulating air below between the
lung and the diaphragm.
And so every breath would have been more and more shallow because his lungs
would have been more and more constricted by this air above the diaphragm.
But that eventually he'd suffocated.
And all of this sounds horrible and tragic, but it forms this fantastic pattern
in my father's life because my father, when he was very small,
he lived in northern Idaho with this enormous Ukrainian family and his father
went crazy one day.
This is all public record.
I've talked about this a lot, but his father took a rifle and walked around the
house and tried to kill him, my father, and ultimately killed my father's, well,
killed his wife, my father's mother, and then killed himself.
But my father's earliest memories are of hiding underneath a bed as his father
walked around the house in logging boots with a rifle calling his name, trying
to get him to come out so that he could be killed.
Jesus Christ.
And so my father spent his entire life sort of looking for his mother because
as his father was trying to kill him, he was trying to find his mother who at
that point had been killed.
And so my father really had this kind of serial pattern with women.
He was always looking in a way for the woman, the woman.
And ultimately, he was shot by the man with a gun in the way that he would have
been shot when he was four years old.
And one of the uncanny things is that their bodies were only preserved because
a bed on the second floor of this structure, as it was burning, the bed fell
over their bodies and insulated their bodies.
And my father had escaped his father by hiding underneath a bed when he was a
small child.
And the fact that the Lonely Hearts ad was headlined Kismet and the fact that
this boulder rolled down in front of my father's car just as he was leaving.
That prevented him from getting there in time where he probably would have been
able to escape before the ex-boyfriend arrived or was there's so many odd,
bizarre coincidences and synchronicities.
You know, you could sort of you would have to really dismiss a lot of things in
order to make this not something significant, not fate or not some reoccurring
theme woven into time.
And in a way that, you know, understanding all these different aspects of it,
it provides a comfort that it doesn't seem like this random thing.
It seems like something that my father's some aspect of my father's life that
was coming full circle and was finally being completed.
And maybe I am clutching at straws and I'm just a kind of person looking for
significance, which is what we all are.
But I'll take comfort where I can find it.
Watch the entire episode for free only on Spotify.