Name: Joe Rogan Experience #1751 - Brian Simpson
Uploaded: 2021-12-23T00:00:00.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #1751 - Brian Simpson' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-12-23. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #1751 - Brian Simpson' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-12-23. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #1751 - Brian Simpson

the Joe Rogan experience train by day Joe Rogan podcast by night all day
we're up Ryan we're up we're here man what's going on brother good to see you
it's happening
it is yeah cheers sir thank you Merry Christmas Happy New Year all that good
stuff yay you know
you know how people started doing that why I don't know because doing prohibition
to it was a way to try to tell if you had bullshit alcohol because if you banged
it and it bubbled then you know it wasn't yeah because people would sell
bullshit alcohol it's not funny because that's exactly what's going on with the
fentanyl overdoses the reason why fentanyl is like rampant through this country
is because people are getting this shit from Mexico because heroin's illegal so
they're getting it from Mexico they're getting the coke from Mexico and it's laced
fentanyl and all that stuff is is laced and all that's the reason why they do
it they cut it to make it stronger so they can have less cocaine because fentanyl
is cheap and that's why all these people are dying so they can transport more
yes do you know the number one cause of death between people 18 to 49 right now
is fentanyl
that's crazy 100,000 people died last year from fentanyl
that's a real epidemic that is a real that's crazy yes it's crazy way more than
died from covid with the same age class
yeah i um we we recently had a bunch of comics pass because from fentanyl yeah
that whole thing with
quigley and those three dudes she was hanging with um and then i remember
seeing you know so i'm checking on
my people that i know you know do a little bit of the powder and i'm like hey
man you know you and a lot of people
like all like um i'm i'm gonna leave the shit alone they leave the shit alone i
was like why doesn't
everybody just test and he goes you can test it i was like yeah you can test it
he was like
party tonight you know it's like you can just go get the sick man you haven't
learned dude if heroin was
legal if cocaine was legal you'd get it straight from the source you'd get real
cocaine that's not cut
at all it will be probably i've never done coke but the way they describe it it's
like a much better
experience and then you don't have to worry about it and then you know what you're
doing yeah i'm i'm
i'm in the legalize everything camp you know yeah we talked about the last time
i was like just legalize
it all have it come have have the fda exactly the really this it's scalable
right it's like what would
you do if it was just the three of us imagine if just three of us were on an
island and jamie's like
uh marijuana should be illegal and we were like what the jamie and jamie wants
to lock us up for
marijuana like that would be crazy we'd have to kill jamie right right well
there's two of us yeah
we're like what the fuck are you talking about man but that's exactly what it's
like with the
government with the government it's like one person versus three or four
whatever it is it's like it's
like a small group of people that are deciding that things should be illegal
and then it's a bunch of
parents that don't want their children to get addicted and i understand that i'm
a parent i don't want my
children to get addicted but that's what is happening that's what's happening
but here's a here's always my
pushback on that right is all of the horrible things that have happened with
drugs have happened
during the prohibition era yes so you know making it legal isn't going to make
it more likely that
your kids are going to get addicted in fact they know what wasn't it um where
they study the people
coming back from vietnam and they were like the people that did heroin over
there would come back and
the ones that had like loving supportive environments and family they stopped
doing heroin yes yes so it's
like i think that you know but it's hard to say that it's somebody that like
lost someone right you
know but yeah i've lost very good friends one of my best friends in life died
of a drug overdose he died
from pills i think we went on not exactly sure but i think he was on oxys and
this was uh in the early
2000s it's um it's an epidemic i mean it's it's terrible but i feel like you
should be able to
make your own choices look we're here drinking scotch if if i drank this bottle
and you drank that bottle
we might both be dead you know we drank a whole bottle of this stuff let me
just go to the hospital
you're gonna get up if we drank all the liquor on that table we just decided in
an hour to drink all
the liquor on the table we'd be dead 100 but we're not going to do that right
we're adults and i think the
same would be the case if people had access to real cocaine and real heroin i'm
not saying you should
do cocaine and heroin look i'm a exercise fiend i'm not thinking they should
just go and do drugs
all the time you shouldn't but you're an adult you should be able to make up
your own choices and no
one no other adult should be able to tell you what you can and can't do all the
things that you do that
are illegal that people blame drugs on like driving under the influence or like
going crazy and murdering
people all we have laws already for those things you already can't do those
things yeah the drug
is not the problem the problem is have you ever heard gabor mate talk about uh
drugs and
and addiction no it's a very interesting guy he's uh an expert on drugs and
addiction and
and uh and the all the the real fallacies what's his name gabor mate mate m-a-t-e
um but he say it all comes from trauma i mean all these people that are like
severely addicted all
those people that you see that are homeless and they're just shooting up and
smoking crack those
people are all sexually abused physically abused beaten they've come from
traumatic backgrounds that's
the problem the problem is not the drugs but they lost everything it's the
environment yes i remember
remember the old remember the cat williams joke where he's like uh he's like
aspirin is perfectly
legal you take 15 and the motherfuckers that'll be your last headache that's
true you know it's a
good way to put it yeah it's like yeah it we but nobody wants to really address
the environment thing
because that's a bigger that's not a simple yeah fix bro eat a pound of salt
you're dead as
fuck take one pound of salt eat it you're dead yeah i think you eat a pound of
anything you're pretty
much gone right well not no you probably get away with a pound of sugar unless
you're a professional
there's a lot of people out there eat a pound of sugar a day yeah you know for
the longest time
of my life i never thought about it like when you go to a restaurant over there
and go this is a quarter
pound of beef or this is you know this is a half pound burger and it's like i
never really put that
together like oh i'm putting i'm putting a half i'm putting a half a pound of
meat in my stomach
yeah that's not good for you yeah it is is it yeah yeah it doesn't matter how
it's cooked bro people
have been eating meat since the dawn of time there's nothing wrong with meat
what's wrong with people's
diets is all the they eat with meat that's why those epidemiology studies are
so
flawed because those those studies are never done they say like what you know
an epidemiology study is
like they they they quiz a bunch of people they give them a form to fill out
and they say how many
times a week do you eat meat and then they look for instances of cancer
instances of heart attacks
high blood pressure and then they make a correlation the problem with that is
they're not asking what
are you doing with the meat are you eating cheeseburgers on a sugary bun with a
bunch of fries dipped in
fat are you drinking it with a a large coca-cola that's all sugar like what
what is your diet like
are you smoking cigarettes are you doing this are you doing that and then you'd
get a better baseline
if you said to a person what are you eating and they say well i eat a 16 ounce
grass-fed ribeye
and then i'll have some steamed broccoli or some sauteed spinach look at those
people they're healthy
as if you're exercising and your body's not overweight and you're taking care
of yourself
there's nothing wrong with meat oh i don't do any of those things damn it
no i gotta start i got i thought i was telling her i was like i need to spend
like a month at david
gargans house you don't want to do that no yeah he might kill me you don't want
to do that get up son
dance till tomorrow have you ever have you ever kicked it with like chill with
that dude oh yeah
in his environment well i never worked out with him but i've hung out with him
multiple i just hung
out with him a couple days and go in vegas oh okay yeah i saw he was on he was
on the other day yeah
yeah yeah oh that's right i did go to vegas jimmy but i only went for a an
about four hours this is
what happened went to andrew schultz's wedding and then whitney cummings said i
gotta leave at 6 45
i'm gonna do a set in vegas and then i'm gonna fly back tonight at 10 o'clock i
go really and so
it was me lex friedman my wife and whitney and we said it let's go so we went
and uh whitney did
a private party at this lady's house with dana carvey yeah some rich lady and
uh so we do this
we do the gig and then uh we go back she she they had gotten her a private jet
we go back and the
private jet was broken no pilot no one to get back so we wound up taking a car
we had to get a car
service to drive us back to la yeah from vegas to la we got back at 5 30 in the
morning but in the
meantime we hung out at the uh we hung out at the the um what's it the win for
a little bit and uh hung
out with david i'm surprised david goss was like let's run back he was doing
push-up contests with lex
i got a video of them doing push-ups in the floor of uh the mirage or of uh the
wind was it close
no of course not no well lex was drunk david moved so fast when he was doing
push-ups i saw
did you see that video yeah i'm so fast bro he does push-ups all day there's
not there's no more
disciplined human that's ever walked the face of the earth it's it's insane
yeah it's insane i wish
i could tell you about his knee injury but he asked me not to to explain
exactly what they had done
but you find out like how up his knee was and now he's running thousands of
miles on that knee like
what the hell yeah i had a one-off that's lex by the way was 30 hours of uh no
food and just
just drinking why was he why was he not eating i don't know he's not even
knowing them correctly
who was that guy's some just dude who just showed up look there was a whole
bunch of people in the lobby
just filming these guys doing push-ups but look at goggins he could do that all
day all day
he'll do thousands of push-ups yeah he's you don't want to work out you don't
want to go to his
house and work out that's he'll wake you up at four o'clock in the morning who's
gonna carry the boats
you'd be like what what are boats what are you talking about we're in nevada
yeah he's a he's an interesting dude like i'm i'm i'm i'm i'm following him on
instagram every
morning he's like you're a pussy don't be a pussy today stay hard yeah yeah
well he's you know that's
what he did to himself the beautiful thing about that guy is that he was 300
pounds he was overweight
he was drinking milkshakes and couldn't even run around the block and then
decided to turn himself
into what we see today yeah i had a warner officer like him when i was in the
service yeah man he was
like older than all of us and just smoking us every like you couldn't give him
an excuse
you know because he was better than you at everything and older than you so it
was like
you you it was no there was no my my my my back hurts i got a cramp so what
you know because his attitude was like oh so you're gonna let you so you're
gonna fail the mission
because you got a cramp right yeah in the military that's uh exactly how they
have to look at it you
can't just wait for a day where you feel perfect yeah but we see when you got a
leader lik