Name: Punkie Johnson Wants to do Celebrity Boxing
Uploaded: 2023-02-07T18:34:18.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Punkie Johnson Wants to do Celebrity Boxing' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-02-07. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Punkie Johnson Wants to do Celebrity Boxing' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-02-07. Transcript available.

- The Joe Rogan experience.
- Yeah, I like it.
I'm really, really, really, really digging it.
- I'm glad you're doing it.
- I got to do it, Joe.
I've been wanting to do it for so long.
I just, you know, and it's so crazy too
because I thought that my hook would be,
so my trainer basically told me I'm southpaw.
I thought I was a right-handed boxer.
He's like, no, you're a left-handed boxer.
I was like, you don't.
- Do you write with your left hand?
- I write with my left hand.
- You write with your left hand?
- I do everything with my left hand.
- But you fight with your left hand forward
or your right hand forward?
- My right hand forward.
- Okay, so you fight southpaw.
- Yes, yes.
So I thought that my right hand was the strongest.
That's what I thought, but my left hand is the strongest.
But I got a killer right hook though too.
But my left hook sucks.
But it's all in my balance.
He said, but your power is your two.
- Right, your straight left.
- Yeah.
So, 'cause I was like, no, no, no, no.
I was like my power is my right hand.
He said, no, it's your left hand.
So we got in a fight.
So he was like, so he came charging at me.
And as he was charging at me, I did this to him.
He was like, you southpaw.
If you would have did this, then you would have been.
- Right, because you were trying to set him up
for a big left hand.
- Right, I stopped him with that.
He said, that is your jab hand.
That's how I know your power coming from here.
- We know a lot of fighters, they would fight southpaw,
even though they were right-handed.
That was Oscar de la Hoya.
- Yeah.
- He's right-handed, but he would fight southpaw,
so his strong hand would be forward.
- Okay, okay.
- Yeah, there's different schools of thought on that.
- Yeah.
- Emanuel Stewart did that with a lot of people.
He took guys that were natural right-handed,
and he put them in a southpaw stance.
Because if you're, also if you're learning
from a southpaw stance, you have an advantage
that most people fight orthodox.
So when you're fighting, it gives people a very,
when you fight someone who's a southpaw,
it's confusing when you're boxing.
'Cause everything's backwards.
- Yeah. - So if you're not used to it,
like in the early days of boxing,
but then the best guys are guys like Terrence Crawford,
who could just switch, or Boots Ennis,
who just switch. - Oh yeah.
- They just switch.
They could fight you southpaw,
they could fight you orthodox,
and you're like, oh Jesus.
Like, you don't know where the fuck punches are coming from.
- No. - They're coming from everywhere.
- Yeah, that's why you gotta learn how to stick and move.
Get out of there.
- But back in the day, that was really rare.
Like Marvin Hagler was the great at that.
He was like the most famous of all.
- Who was it, Marvin?
- Marvin Hagler.
- Okay. - Marvelous Marvin Hagler.
Yeah, he was the middleweight champion.
He knocked out Tommy Hearns.
And I mean, Hagler in his time was a destroyer.
And Hagler would fight, he would switch it up all the time.
He'd fight orthodox, he'd fight southpaw.
He can go back and forth.
He would throw a punch and switch stances.
It was very rare in Hagler's day
that an elite world champion
would switch stances so effortlessly.
But now you got like Terrence Crawford does it.
Like I said, Boots Ennis does it.
- Oh yeah, I ain't gonna say I can't do it.
I'm saying I never have, but I might.
- It's a good thing to learn.
If you can learn how to do things from your left side,
it actually shows you how to do things better
from your right side, weirdly enough.
It actually helps you.
- I'm still learning how to write with my right hand.
I can't even hold this.
- Yeah.
I broke my arm once when I had to do that.
I had to learn how to write and draw with my left hand.
- I mean, I think I can, but it's gonna be, it's awful.
- You can, but you have to teach your hand how to do it,
which is so interesting.
'Cause you would think if your left hand does it so well,
your right hand would just,
you would just tell your right hand to do it.
But my left hand is stupid.
It just doesn't listen good.
My right hand is like.
- Exactly.
I kinda like being left handed though.
It's like, you know, crazily when I was growing up,
I got bullied for being left handed.
- A lot of people do.
- You know, it's like, I was the weird one.
- They used to think it was satanic.
- Yeah, it's just like.
- They would tell left handed people
to not use their left hand back in the day.
- And now I heard about that.
But when I was in school, they didn't do that to me.
But the kids would bully me.
- For being left handed.
- For being out, yes.
- That's so stupid.
- I'm having duck feet.
Do you know I look goofy cuz?
I hate boxing sometimes and watching myself
'cause I'm so goofy.
My feet are duck feet, so.
- And they splay out?
- Yes, and I can't get 'em, you know,
I'm trying to get 'em to stay straight.
But when I, you know, I know what happened.
I always had duck feet.
But I look so goofy when I'm boxing
because I hurt my niece playing soccer.
- Oh.
- When I was in college.
I was, I don't know how to play soccer,
but I was, you know, playing.
I went to do a power kick and this person blocked me.
So my body went one way and my leg went the other way.
I messed my knee up, so.
I just look goofy when I'm boxing.
But I might use that as an advantage.
They were like, "Look at this goofy footed bitch."
Then I get in there and I'll whack somebody.
But I can do it and I love it.
- So you're really thinking about fighting.
It seems like you've got a plan in your head.
- Yeah.
- 'Cause you're saying, you're like painting scenarios
where people underestimate you and you fuck them up.
Like, so, in my mind, you're thinking about this.
- I've been thinking about it for a long time.
- Really?
- Mm-hmm.
- Okay, have one.
Please don't have a lot.
Don't get, don't get your head in a break.
- I really want to do celebrity boxing.
- Who'd you want to fight?
- I don't know.
- You want to call somebody out?
- I probably will.
I'm gonna holler at my dog.
Sam J, what's up, bitch?
Let's fight.
- Do you think that, like,
how much time would you need to prepare
for something like that?
- Um, mm, a month.
- That's it, really?
- I'm telling you, I'll be out here.
- You doing a lot?
How often are you boxing?
- If I could do, if I can just, like,
box six days a week for...
- A month?
- What, 24 days, you know?
- You ready to fuck somebody up?
- Hell yeah.
Fucking right.
- I believe ya.
Short fingernails, no need to fuck around.
- I would like to fight my peers,
the people that I love.
Now, I could, I don't know.
- Why do you want to hurt 'em?
- Just 'cause it's fun.
Which is, you know, just like messing around like kids,
you know, just messing around with my partners and shit.
But, I do be thinking about starting beef with people,
just to like...
- Just to fuck 'em up?
- Yeah.
- Really?
- Yeah.
- Don't do that.
Especially now that you're on TV.
- Look, I see, man, look, I be watching Clarissa Fields.
I'm like, that's a big fucking...
- Oh, Clarissa Shields, yeah.
- What'd I say?
- Clarissa Fields.
- So, Mikey Day be making fun of me
'cause I get everybody names wrong.
- That's Joey Diaz's move.
There's entire videos of him saying people's names wrong.
- And I say it with confidence, too.
- Of course, that's what Joey does, too.
He calls Stipe Miocce Stiopic.
He calls him Stiopic.
He called Khabib Nurmagomedov.
He used to call him Kala-Beeb.
- Yeah.
- The fucking Kala-Beeb gets a hold of ya.
- Yeah.
- The Kala-Beeb?
- Yeah, Kala-Beeb, you call him.
- Kala-Beeb?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, I do have a name problem.
I'ma get it together, but that's a big...
She big, like that's her.
I wouldn't wanna fight her.
- You ever heard of Ann Wolfe?
- Oh, is that, like, ain't she old now?
- Yes.
- Yeah.
- Ann Wolfe, she used to be a trainer.
She was training people after she fought, and...
What's his name?
James Kirkland, the guy, he fought Canelo.
- Yeah, yeah, she's a psycho.
Yeah, I wouldn't wanna fight her.
- She had the most vicious one, right here.
- Right there.
- Boom, one of the most vicious one-punch KO
in women's boxing.
Look at that, and she did a little dance after her.
That was, I mean, they had talked to a gang of shit
before that fight, and unfortunately,
she talked a gang of shit to the wrong lady,
'cause, you know, Ann Wolfe had, like,
legit one-punch KO power.
James Kirkland, that's who it was,
and who eventually went on to fight Canelo,
but watch this.
- Look at them arms, oh my God.
- But it's also the skill.
She's setting up this overhand right.
- Looking at her dead in her eyes.
- Mm-hmm.
- Measure, measure, mm-hmm.
- And then she comes forward,
too predictably, boom!
- Slip.
- Oh my goodness.
- Knockout.
- I mean, it's like one of the greatest
one-punch KOs of all time.
Phenomenal, I mean, that's an amazing punch.
Look how jacked she was, too.
- But that's one thing, I don't want to get too jacked,
'cause my problem is,
I start doing too much arm work,
I'll get jacked.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- Good.
- Jacked, hard J, that's why I keep my hair,
because if I cut it all off,
I'm gonna look like a man.
I was like, I don't want to be,
I don't want to look,
'cause I had to chill out for a second,
'cause I don't want to get that jacked.
I still want to be a little cute.