Name: Joe Rogan Experience #1975 - Dan Flores
Uploaded: 2023-04-25T00:00:00.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #1975 - Dan Flores' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-04-25. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #1975 - Dan Flores' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-04-25. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #1975 - Dan Flores

Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out.
The Joe Rogan Experience.
Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day.
Yeehaw.
How are you, Dan?
Great to see you.
Great to see you too, Joe.
Listen, man, I know I've talked to you since I read Coyote America, but God
damn, that's
a good book.
It's such a good book.
So I'm very excited about this.
I'm sure this is going to be awesome too.
Wild New World, The Epic Story of Animals and People in America.
I've told so many people about coyotes because of you, and I seem so smart.
Well, I appreciate that.
It's such a crazy animal.
You know, one of the things that's interesting about coyotes in our area is
they don't howl.
I think they've learned.
Oh, yeah.
That's happening in LA too.
They've learned not to howl.
Really?
Yeah.
Interesting.
Yeah.
Attracts attention to them.
Well, I used to hear it a lot where I lived.
I lived in Ventura County, and we had real problems with them.
Like, they killed all my chickens.
It was like, they were everywhere.
Yeah.
But also, fucking cool.
You know, it's such a conflicted thing because I hated them because they killed
my chickens.
And they also honeypotted my dog into killing my chickens.
Did I tell you that story?
No, you didn't tell me that.
Oh, boy.
Listen to this.
This is how smart these motherfuckers are.
I had this dog.
Rest in peace.
His name is Johnny Cash.
He was the best dog.
I'll get sad.
But, let me catch my breath here because I really love that dog.
Oh, I understand this.
I just lost a dog last May.
This dog was just, he was just such a sweetheart.
But he was a big dog.
He was a Mastiff, a Regency Mastiff.
His father was actually on Fear Factor.
And his father was this, we put people in these big bite suits and they had to
run.
And we did it with Belgian Malinois.
And the problem was for, like, really super athletic guys, like, we had some,
like, real high-end athletes on the show occasionally.
We got, like, amateur football players.
Guys were just stacked and strong as hell.
And a Malinois, no matter what, is still only 60, 70 pounds.
And so we brought in these Regency Mastiffs because they wanted to figure out a
dog that could do bite work but was way stronger.
And this dog was, like, a buck 60 and built like a brick shithouse.
His dad, my dog's dad, was actually in the movie The Hulk.
If you ever saw the movie The Hulk with Eric Bannon when they turned the dogs
into Hulk dogs, that was actually that dog.
So my friend Joe, shout out to Joe, who raised these dogs, he raised them for
intelligence and temperament.
And he wouldn't let any dog breed that had any aggression towards other dogs or
any aggression towards people.
So they were the best dogs.
And so this dog was hanging out with all these other dogs that were doing bite
work and everything.
And he was just so chill.
Just hanging out.
I'd go, how does this dog so chill?
And just, like, he goes, he's just fucking smart.
He's smart.
He's well-raised and well-trained and loved.
So anyway, I had his son.
And he was the fucking best.
But he was in the yard during the day and a coyote would come by the fence.
And the fence was six feet high, like a wrought iron fence.
He couldn't get over this fence.
He didn't even try to get over the fence.
It was a nice big yard.
But the coyotes could get over that fence like it didn't even exist.
It was wild to watch.
I watched one with a chicken in his mouth jump and put his feet at the top of
that fence and over like a Cirque du Soleil acrobat.
Oh, yeah.
It was amazing.
So we had this large coop where the chickens were that the coyotes couldn't
figure out a way to get into.
And then, have you ever raised chickens before?
My dad raised chickens.
They do a thing called brooding.
And what brooding is, chickens lay an egg, you know, almost every day.
But none of them are going to become chicks because there's no rooster.
So these are unfertilized eggs.
But they don't understand that.
So they decide every now and again that this egg is going to become a chick and
they won't let anyone near it.
And they pluck their feathers out and they just sit on this egg and they stop
making eggs.
And they get real weirded out.
And the only way to cure them of this is to put them in a smaller pen with a
post so that they have to hold on to the post to stand.
They can't sit and squat like over an egg.
So you put a post in there, put a small coop next to the coop.
It takes a little, I forget how many days it takes, but they get over it and
then you can put them back in with the regular hens.
Well, that little coop, this sneaky ass fucking coyote had figured out that he
could get my dog to destroy that little coop.
Because my dog was, he was huge.
And so somehow or another, this coyote became friends with my dog, just kept
hanging around.
And my dog was like, oh, it's another dog.
Because he has a little dog friend.
Like, this is my other little dog friend.
Hey, what's up, buddy?
What are you doing?
He's like, hey, you want to know where the chickens are?
And my pool guy fucked up and left one of the gates open into where the
chickens usually are.
And I was inside the house with my kids and my wife and we were playing some
sort of a game.
I forget what game it was, but I saw in the background a coyote run across the
backyard and hop the fence with the chicken in his mouth.
I'm like, motherfuckers.
I thought maybe somebody left the coop open or something happened.
So I run outside and there's Johnny standing over this destroyed coop that he
was so proud that he busted apart.
The coyote tricked him into smashing that coop and then the coyote grabbed the
chicken and ran off with it.
I wish I had known about this story when I was writing Coyote America.
I want to put it in there.
How amazing is that?
Like, there's no doubt in my mind that that coyote tricked that dog into doing
that.
Because that dog had never destroyed that coop.
And then afterwards, he realized he's so strong, he can go right through the
whole coop.
So he tore a hole in the mesh.
The chicken wire, he just tore it apart.
He just, he was so big.
And then he went in and killed nine of them.
And we...
Your dog killed nine of them?
Yeah, he killed nine of them.
I had 22 of them at one point in time.
And he killed nine of them in one, like, in just as much time as it took for
him to get out there.
He fucked up a couple other ones too, but they lived.
He was just grabbing them and shaking them and grabbing them and shaking them.
He was having a party.
Unfortunately, he was taught to do that by the fucking coyotes.
Well, I mean, this is an example of what one would call animal culture, you
know?
I mean, I make an argument for it in Wild New World that this is something that
happens fairly commonly.
Animals, just like us, have culture.
And they teach one another things.
That sounds like a pretty good, for instance, of it.
Well, they're so clever.
They're so clever.
And it's so interesting, our thoughts about intelligence.
Because just until recently, we've realized how intelligent ravens and crows
are.
About they can use tools.
They understand water displacement.
So if they can't drink out of something, they'll drop rocks into it so the
water level raises so they can drink out of it.
I mean, it's brilliant stuff.
So I wonder, because we don't have a way of measuring that with coyotes, I
wonder how smart those motherfuckers are.
Well, they are, I think, probably among the smartest of the wild animals,
certainly in America.
I mean, you know, one of the reasons we domesticated wolves and created dogs
out of them is because, for one thing, we understood them.
They live in the same kind of circumstances we do in social groups.
They have to acculturate their pups just the way we have to do with kids.
And so I think part of the explanation for why dogs are our oldest domesticate
is because of their ability to understand us, to understand human language.
I mean, this is one of the theories for early domestication of wolves is that
there were some of them that were not only hyper-social and so amenable to
being with humans and hanging out with us,
but also because there are some that were gifted word learners.
We didn't have to learn their language.
They learned our language.
And I think that is probably an indication of, you know, coyotes are out of the
canid family.
All these creatures come out of the same family from 5.3 million years back.
And I think coyotes, in some respects, may be the shrewdest and cleverest of
all those groups because, unlike wolves, they're not the big brawny dogs on the
block.
They're the ones who have to play this game of, man, I can't let this big burly
wolf get me.
I've got to figure out how to elude it.
And that's responsible for a lot of their intelligence and cleverness is they
co-evolved alongside wolves for so long.
They had to learn how to be the little guy who managed to survive by his wits.
Yeah, and also one of the things that I learned from your book that's a good
thing to bring up here is that they are not directly related to gray wolves.
So they didn't interbreed with them.
That's right.
They interbreeded with red wolves.
So when the gray wolves were around, the gray wolves just slaughtered them.
Yeah.
And so they had developed this ability to spread their territory, which is what,
when humans started killing them,
now they're in every single city in the country.
And this is, like, when did that happen?
It's relatively recent, right?
Yeah.
The expansion started really out of two things, two things that took place in
the early 20th century.
One was the elimination of wolves in the east, which created an open niche for
a mid-sized predator.
And the other was this campaign that first the states and then the federal
government began to launch against coyotes and wolves in the west.
And the government was, the government hunters were pretty successful in taking
out wolves because wolves are so attuned to be pack animals that if you kill
one wolf in a pack, you could use the scent from that wolf basically to catch,
trap, kill every single wolf in the pack.
But coyotes responded to that basically by going, you probably remember our
conversation about this, Joe, back in 2017.
They would go into what's known as a fishing mode.
They are, coyotes, like humans, are fish and fusion animals.
And when they're in fusion, they can exist in a pack.
When they're in fission, they break apart the packs, and in singles and pairs,
they scatter.
And that's what they do when they're pressured.
They learned how to do this from wolves.
And so when we started trying to take them out with poisons and gunning in the
west, they went into this fishing mode, and it caused them to start spreading
across the country.
And that started in the early 20th century.
I mean, when I was growing up in Louisiana in the 1960s, coyotes were first
beginning to appear in Louisiana, which is how I got fascinated with them.
First beginning.
Yeah, first beginning in the early 1960s.
I started seeing them in about 1962 or something, 61 or 2.
Is there a historical record of them ever being on the east coast previously?
No, there is not.
So they really were just a west coast animal.
Well, there's a couple of archaeological sites dating from the Pleistocene from
10,000 years ago that appear to show coyotes probably fairly randomly appearing
in places like Virginia and Pennsylvania.
But in the historical record that we have, they weren't on the east coast until
the middle of the 20th century.
And they start showing up in northern New York and upstate New York by about
the 1920s or so.
And they start coming down south from that point until, I mean, they're finally,
they're reaching Manhattan, for example, in the 1990s.
Had this, had they already, had wolves already been extirpated at this point?
Yeah, wolves had been taken out.
I mean, the great, you know, and I talk about it in Wild New World, the whole
wolf campaign in America.
But the two guys who put together this classic volume on w