Name: Joe Rogan Experience #2050 - Ehsan Ahmad
Uploaded: 2023-10-21T00:00:00.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #2050 - Ehsan Ahmad' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-10-21. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #2050 - Ehsan Ahmad' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-10-21. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #2050 - Ehsan Ahmad

Joe Rogan podcast check it out the Joe Rogan experience trained by day Joe Rogan
podcast by
night all day what's up brother hey good glad to be here glad to have you
finally man dude I was
probably around when when did you first when was your first time on stage my
first time on stage
was in this place called Tommy T's in Livermore California oh I know that place
yeah it was a it
was an open mic at 2012 end of 2012 early 2013 yeah that's that's when I
started and I remember
going up on stage my first joke kind of hit and I bombed the whole time but
that one little hit
was enough it was enough to remember what it was yeah oh my name is a son Ahmad
and I know that's
very 9/11 II so I probably met you around 2014 then 2015 is when we met okay
yeah I and this is a
story I tell to all the door guys on what it's like to be a door guy at a
comedy club because this is
the first time we've ever had a conversation I was sitting by the back door and
you had just stopped
and this is something that you just talked to like all the new guys I've
noticed that you do that
you know and then you were showing me your phone and telling me your process
and how you write and
how you listen to every single set as you drove back home after the store and
you talked to me for
like 20 minutes and then you left and Curtis came up to me and was like hey so
someone pooped in the
the bathroom and missed and I had to go clean it up and it was pure liquid oh
it was pure liquid every time I kept wiping more would come in it was unreal
unreal yeah and as I told you that I
tell all the door guys that's what it's like working at a comedy club wow
especially at a high level one you get these really cool moments and then you
have to and you get you also learn your place a little bit
I didn't know door people have to clean shit oh yeah really yeah don't they
have like a janitor or something not not during the night oh you know this is
this is that we'll made it crazy this was at like 7:30 it wasn't
like yeah it was like way too early to be pooping and missing oh my god there's
something about bar poop poops when people are drinking it's just gonna be so
chaos like every time I've ever gone into like a bar bathroom there's dudes in
there shitting it's just like oh my god I can't wait to get out of
here quick if you're shitting in a bar it's basically like oh this is the last
resort I had no other option and nobody wants to do some fucking public shitting
no and it was back when the story in the hallway had the single bathrooms oh
yeah those were like extra gross oh those were a disaster those were absolute
nightmares oh yeah remember when like comics would be in that one little
bathroom and then there'd be the staircase up there so people would be talking
shit to you while you're in the bathroom no I never I never
had that experience at the store yeah you know the stairs to the belly room yes
you know where that is yeah like there's a window right there for the
oh there is there is so guys would be talking shit while while other guys were
shitting they're just ragging on them yelling in the window that back parking
lot before they invented sacred grounds and before they had the back bar that
was where we'd all hang out but the problem is you would get randoms from that
little back area that would come and they would come and interrupt a
conversation and get in the way like oh we got a place where we could just
chill by ourselves right right and then by the time I had gotten there you had
just gotten back yeah and so for you to hang out it would really be really be
interesting to watch as a door guy because you'd have to watch people would be
like making game plans to talk to you they would you know you could see them
like okay if I do this and I do this and I do this and you'd have to just tell
people like hey maybe you should go hang out in the patio or something like
that yeah it sucks because you want to say hi to everybody
but also my friends are there right I see them every now and again you know
especially if it's like someone like burr that I only see like once a month or
you know when you see them you're like this is an important time well and it's
like when you're in a place with other comics like that it just feels like home
yeah you know so it's like oh I want to hang out at home and we talk about this
all the time about the mothership that green room is our clubhouse I live there
it's so fun last night was so fun it was so and they're always fun like every
night we're there we just have so much fun just on stage and also in the green
room watching each other's new jokes and shit
well talking about comedy and and the green room itself is just such a comedy
place you have Lenny Bruce's mic Mae West's couch Joey Diaz's words Rodney
Dangerfield's notes
handwritten notes handwritten notes it is like a place where I feel like oh I'm
in it I'm inspired it's it's a it's the best place in the world I think I think
so too I mean we were talking about what we hoped it would be and what it is
and I don't even know if I I don't think I ever hoped it would be this good
I mean the club's not even a year in I I think we're only just sort of at the
start of what it can be and we have like six hundred and sixty thousand
Instagram followers already
yeah
it's sold out every night it's just it's crazy and now that Gillis is here
oh my god Shane moved here McCusker's here and you know and we've got Ari and
we've got I mean Ari's been coming down a lot we're doing another protect our
parks
trying to get that motherfucker to move here Sam Talon I think is moving here
yes he wants to move here right yeah it is incredible it's incredible it is a
the right place to be at the right time I felt very lucky in my life I feel
like everywhere I've been I've been at the right place in the right time
yeah if you make the most out of things that's what happens most of the time I
mean obviously horrible things go wrong for good people but the reality is that
like every time something happens in your life it gives you an opportunity to
figure it out okay where do I go now what is it
and 9-11 or excuse me 9-11 the new 9-11 the COVID oh yeah that you know like
there's these monumental shifts in culture and society 9-11 was a big one
obviously but COVID was a big one too man
it shifted a lot of things it destroyed people's belief in mainstream media it
made people completely distrust the government and their regulations
and their wisdom behind closing this and closing that and forcing this and
forcing that and it made everybody just go man where where the fuck am I going
because this is not what I used to live in anymore this is a different place
now
right and all that happened we come to Austin and then I'm like I gotta open up
a club I have to like there's no real like fucking comedy store thing here and
we're there were so many of us already here
already here you were already here Simpson was already here Derek was already
here it's like a bunch of fucking scouts went out early with fucking cold
camping and teepees and shit it was it was wild
it was wild the first the first door guy that moved out here was a funny dude
regular at the mothership named Dylan Sullivan yeah very funny dude yeah he got
on a discord call with me I was in California we were in the midst of the
second lockdown
the second lockdown which was brutal and he goes you gotta come out here there's
stage time indoors
just to perform indoors it was like you it was like drinking water after being
in a desert for two years
it was like a speakeasy because you knew you couldn't do it everywhere no and
there were still those rules we had to walk in with the masks yeah
no that was still here and so it was like it took it off once you start
laughing like what keep looking spraying COVID
this poor guy whoever you are in the front row last night I'm so sorry I
accidentally spit it on you twice you know when you're punctuating your words
and I'm seeing this guy going like this I'm I wanted to address it but I didn't
want to stop the bit so if you're out there buddy I'm sorry I spit on you I hit
him twice I remember one time I was opening a show of Fat Man and I was eating
I was eating it like it was bad and then I spit
but when you're eating it everyone just watching you so the whole audience sees
me just spit on the guy in the front row
I've been spit on before I've been in the front row it's like when people Joey
Diaz will spit on you like crazy it's like when someone's on stage they don't
mean to sorry
right it really means that we're into it yeah we're just going hard right you
know or bombing
and trying to save ourselves
trying to save yourself is the saddest fucking moment of your life
there comes a point where you have to be like alright I'm not gonna ask what
they do for work I'm just gonna live in the bomb I'm just gonna live in it I
deserve this
well you need a bunch of bombs to figure out how to bomb you know and I've seen
some people pull out of bombs that's some of the most impressive shit of all
time
mm-hmm when someone starts bombing and then they hit and then they get their
confidence back and then they got a banger and then everybody okay okay maybe
the first joke sucked but we're on board now
it's a really good feeling especially because I open all these shows right is
that when you get on when I get on stage and that first joke doesn't hit and
then it's like ooh alright I'm gonna stay in the pocket and I'm gonna figure
this out and by the end of it you're like this is gonna be a good show that's a
great feeling most certainly you have the hardest job the hardest job is the
audience is cold that's the hardest job the easiest job is like second or third
and then the second hardest job is going on last right but the hardest job is
most certainly going on first well some of them too especially your show
specifically a lot of them are here for the from the podcast and they don't
know stand up like that so they'll come they'll come and they'll look at you
like wait you're not a podcast Joe's not talking to you oh no really they have
they have that vibe to them sometimes they have to be like no no this is what
it is oh that's they used to get that on fear factor people come to see me
because they recognize me from fear factor
fear factor and they want I love that guy that shows great and then they go and
I'd be talking about the pyramids being built and shit there's no animal dicks
where the animal is this guy talking about and then I'd make fun of fear factor
too you know but that was you know it was like that show when I think about it
today like what the fuck were they thinking it was it was a thing it was a real
I remember I was sitting down with my parents and we would watch fear factor
that would be a family thing
Yeah I never watched it well I watched it once and I threw up at home really I
never threw up on the show yeah that's that seems weird I threw up at home once
because I didn't expect to be so grossed out I wasn't prepared and I guess like
on the show I was always prepared to not throw up and there's no close-up
angles yeah this lady was eating worms and she threw it up back in her glass
and then started eating it again and I went
and I ran to the sink and threw up
that's a level of competitiveness that I don't know if I have oh man people
would go for it they would fucking go for it worms are rough because worms are
filled with dirt because they eat dirt so you're eating dirt and mushiness it's
fucking gross
what was it again it was just it was a cash prize at the end what was it yeah
but you had a lot of people are gonna eat some dick and never get a cash prize
right you know that's the problem it's like one person is getting the money you
know but you also like you had it like Michael Yeo took it a lot of people are
gonna eat some dick and never get a cash prize
right you know that's the problem it's like one person is getting the money you
know but y