Name: Joe Rogan Experience #2074 - Shane Gillis
Uploaded: 2023-12-12T00:00:00.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #2074 - Shane Gillis' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-12-12. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #2074 - Shane Gillis' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-12-12. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #2074 - Shane Gillis

Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.
The Joe Rogan experience.
Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day.
Hey.
We're happy rolling.
Yes.
What's happening?
Bro, how fun are these workouts?
Changes your day, right?
Yeah, it makes the day better.
I don't know, I literally don't know how you do this.
What do you mean?
You're like, oh, it's gonna, you're gonna feel so good, dude.
I get to the club, I'm literally falling asleep, I'm sore.
You gotta start taking vitamins.
I take some vitamins.
Do you?
What are you taking?
Take vitamin B.
Yeah, okay.
D.
Okay.
Pause.
C.
Okay.
Take some zinc.
Oh, okay.
That's it.
What, are you getting like a multivitamin?
Yeah, whatever the fucking CVS things is.
Oh, okay.
Those yellow, you know what I'm talking about?
It's probably been on the shelf since the 70s.
Fuck it.
Yeah.
I don't think they're doing anything.
I heard zinc makes you cum harder.
I haven't noticed a big result.
Um, zinc is difficult to get into your bloodstream.
You need an ionophore.
If you're gonna take zinc, you need something like quercetin.
Fuck, I knew I needed an ionophore.
Yeah, ionophore's super important.
What's that?
Something that allows, uh, I don't want to fuck this up, but I think it allows
ions to get
into your bloodstream easier.
It just allows things like zinc to get into your cells easier.
I'm not, yeah, I'm not close to worrying about shit like that.
I'm working on, like, bread.
Bread's tough, dude.
I'll worry about ionophores in a couple years.
Bread's tough.
Boy, when you're sitting at a restaurant and they bring out the bread with the
butter.
Ooh, that smells good.
It's hard.
I mean, this weekend I ate at Denny's and Waffle House.
Ooh, both were pretty good.
Bro, at 2 o'clock in the morning, a fucking waffle with some sausages, it's
hard to beat.
Yeah.
You know what I used to love in L.A.?
Roscoe's.
Chicken and waffles.
God damn, it's good.
It's the best.
With collard greens.
Oh, I don't know about that.
Do you like collard greens?
Fucking love them.
Yeah.
I guess I haven't had them.
Especially when you're, it's the combination of flavors.
It's the chicken, the waffles, the syrup with the butter.
The syrup and the butter.
Too much syrup and too much butter.
Just let's fucking go.
Let's go.
When you're eating it, you're like, mwah, mwah.
As you're eating it, you're like, mwah, mwah.
God, I used to love Roscoe's.
Yeah.
I just ate a waffle, like I said.
Yeah.
This, two days ago, I was eating a waffle.
Waffles are good.
It's pretty wonderful.
Waffles are good.
Waffles with butter and syrup are pretty fucking good.
Sucks that they're bad for you.
It's a crazy way to start the day.
I did find some protein waffles.
What are they called?
Is it Viking waffles?
See if you can find that.
I think there's a company called Viking waffles.
They made, like, protein waffles that are, like, low-carb.
And then I would use butter and then sugar-free syrup.
It's pretty fucking close.
That's it.
Viking waffles.
21 grams of protein, 3 grams of sugar, 5 grams of carbs.
200 calories.
Look at that.
And they're good.
They fucking taste like a real waffle.
People love Vikings.
Who doesn't love Vikings?
Fucking Irish people.
The people that were out on the shore.
People who got raped for 500 years.
Bro, they fucked everybody up forever.
Yeah.
They're the reason why the people in Iceland are so good at strongman
competitions.
You know, those guys like the mountain from Game of Thrones.
Yeah, they're freaks.
Where do you think those genes come from?
Yeah, they need an eruption up there.
We need to get rid of these guys.
A little bit of a volcano.
We can't have these guys.
This is my Irish ancestry coming through.
We got to get rid of these fuckers.
Yeah, they fucked the world up for so long.
That show Vikings, you ever watch that show?
No, I heard it's great.
Fucking great.
I was afraid it was going to be like, because they did, like, women.
Oh, they kill everybody.
All right, good.
Everybody.
No, no, no.
I mean like the badass, kick-ass woman characters.
Do they have that?
They have a couple.
That usually takes me out of a...
No, no, they're realistic.
Okay.
I mean, they're not, like, fucking up all the dudes or anything like that.
Ah, the old Conor McGregor woman.
I don't love it.
They announced a sequel?
Is the girl in the...
Oh, it's Netflix.
And the armor.
The armor takes me out of it.
Why?
It's a little too Game of Thrones, you know?
Show what a real Viking looked like.
What did they really look like?
It looked like shit, dude.
They were like five, six...
They were not these giant...
Well, how the fuck does the mountain come from?
Where does he come from then?
They...
How do you get a seven-foot-tall, 350-pound dude?
They looked like fucking dickheads.
Look at that.
They look like hobbits, dude.
What is that?
That's not real.
I mean, that's not them, but...
That's not real.
That's a Renfear.
Look at that fucking kid.
Those are cosplaying.
Those people are cosplaying people.
Oh, jeez.
Don't do that.
Don't zoom in on his eyes.
That's not fair to that little fella.
That's what they're supposed to look like?
No.
This is...
They've been glorified because they were...
Do we have an accurate depiction of what they actually looked like?
I don't think there was...
Click on that.
I mean, nobody took a picture.
What real Vikings wore?
Click on that.
What?
What real Vikings wore?
See it?
Right here.
Yeah.
So, click on that.
We'll see.
We're an archaeologist.
According to archaeologists.
I used to love archaeologists.
Popular culture.
Talking about Graham Hancock.
All right.
Says the appearance of these infamous travelers, warriors, and mostly farmers.
Interesting.
So, what do they look like?
There's not going to be a picture.
It's just going to explain it.
There's going to be a lot of words.
Yeah.
Words.
But what does it say?
It says variety...
Oh, pssh.
Varieties and form, material, and styles are used to mark
both gender, rank, and local identity.
Says Marianne Vedler, an archaeologist at the University of Oslo's Museum of
Cultural History,
who maintains...
Ooh, has studied Viking textiles.
TV shows and films could make use of this to tell better stories.
Mm-hmm.
As for the male warrior caricature, historians doubt they actually wore cartoonish
horned helmets
in battle.
Aw, come on.
I know, man.
It's disappointing.
Those have peered in art from this era.
In fact, only one preserved Viking helmet has materialized in Scandinavia, and
it was horn-free.
Only one?
They only found one Viking helmet?
Archaeologists found portions of Viking helmets in Denmark, but their
popularity remains unknown.
Similarly, we know of one intact suit of chain mail, which appeared with the
sole surviving helmet.
One fucking suit of chain mail and one helmet.
This was likely worn exclusively by elites and professional warriors, despite
its common appearance in mainstream depictions.
They rocked a reverse mullet.
Mm-hmm.
Hmm.
What's a reverse mullet?
Long up front?
Party up front?
What does that mean?
What's a reverse mullet?
How's that look?
Yeah.
I guess.
What is a reverse mullet?
So, reverse mullet means long on top and short in the back?
Bad explanation here.
Okay.
So, a fade?
There you go.
A rock of a fade.
Yeah.
It's possibly tied to a knot in the back of the head.
The knot may have been decorated with colored tape, which is sprayed into the
hair.
The woman also wore a bond.
This is a lot of guessing.
Yeah.
If you have one helmet and one piece of chain mail...
Yeah, that's all guessing.
You're doing a lot of guessing.
Isn't that wild, though?
They only got one helmet?
That's it.
That's a good look.
All right, they got it in the show.
Nice.
Yeah.
But, yeah, they gave them, like, cool shit.
Oh, okay.
That is pretty cool.
Viking hairstyles.
Did they really tattoo their faces up?
I...
Because they did on the show.
Obviously, there's no way to tell.
But...
Yeah, how do they guess?
They just keep making them so cool.
Yeah, they make them real cool.
And they're a bunch of murderers, and you like them.
Yeah, I don't cheer for them.
No?
No, I don't like the Vikings.
Because of your culture.
Because of my culture?
No, no.
They're just...
I think they're overrated.
Really?
Yeah.
Overrated.
Everything about them is rumors.
They're like, oh, they discovered America first.
It's like, no.
I think they did.
Dude, you got to give Columbus his fucking due.
Columbus gets no due.
Everybody hates Columbus.
He's a cocksucker.
Bro.
Bro, did you ever read that one...
Bro.
He fucking did it.
He didn't even.
He landed in the Bahamas.
Who cares?
That's crazy he did that.
Did you ever hear that one...
There was one priest that traveled with Columbus that wrote those horrific
stories of what
they did to the Native Americans?
Fucking snitch.
Fucking snitch.
Guys, you're not allowed to go wild?
You cross the ocean?
You're going wild.
Yeah, they shot people's arms off.
They didn't give them enough gold.
They dashed babies' heads on the rocks.
They did some horrific shit, man.
Yeah.
Some horrific shit.
But...
People were awful back then.
Yeah.
Just think about how awful people were in the movies in 1950.
Just smack women around.
Yeah.
I was just watching that Sean Connery interview yesterday.
It's pretty good.
Every now and again.
Yeah.
When you've shed it...
He's like, she has to get the last word.
They have to get the last word.
And even after you let them get the last word, that's not enough.
That's actually pretty good.
I can't do it.
Connery.
Oh.
I have a fucking zen in my mouth.
Which makes it harder.
It fucks you up.
Harder to do that accent.
There it is a little.
Oh, you were just in Scotland.
I couldn't kind of do it.
Did you get it?
Bro, I was in Scotland and I was at this place.
And there's a fucking stone circle that's older than Stonehenge.
Yeah.
Like, who made this?
I don't know.
You could just go stand on it.
You could touch it.
Like, they don't even protect it.
It's just laying out there in front of this dude's house.
It's literally in front of this dude's house.
That's crazy.
It's like 50 feet in front.
You could throw a rock.
How old is it?
5,000 plus years old.
Stone circle.
No idea who made it.
They think.
Druids?
Hmm?
Maybe Druids?
That was big back then.
Scotland's fucking beautiful, man.
Scotland's pretty cool.
Oh, my God.
There's no one there.
It's like I kind of discovered it.
You're close.
Cut off their arms, dude.
There's two million people.
The whole country.
Really?
Yeah, the whole country's as big as Austin.
Wow.
Yeah.
It's fucking gorgeous.
God damn, it's pretty.
Yeah.
Low clouds and the hill.
They're not really mountains.
They're kind of like, you know, a couple thousand feet.
Yeah.
But God, it's fucking gorgeous.
God.
And they have these stags everywhere.
These, like, big majestic stags around.
Really?
Yeah, I got a picture of one.
I'll show you a picture.
Let me see that.
I'll send it to Jamie.
So you take a look at it.
Have you heard that that same, the mountain range of, like, the Appalachians is
this, I believe it was connected to Europe.
That's pretty cool.
What's that, Jamie?
The Appalachians, the same mountain range, is the same mountains over there.
Whoa.
Yeah.
It goes across the ocean?
Well, I mean, when they were connected, it did.
Oh, like, during the panspermia days?
Yeah.
What?
Panspermia.
I thought it was Pangea.
Oh, that's the wrong one.
Pangea.
You know what panspermia is?
No, what?
Panspermia is the theory that asteroids created, uh, that seeded life on Earth.
Oh, okay.
It's like spores and amino acids were in asteroids.
That's funny.
It's funny to get to be close and just make something gay.
I know, I did.
I turned it into sperm.
Check out that picture I sent you, Jamie.
Here's another one.
This might be, one might be better.
I didn't zoom in as much on this one.
There's the first one.
Look at this guy.
Oh, damn.
Just wandering around.
I had to zoom in on him.
That's why.
Look at the second one.
It's probably less shitty.
Oh, that's not bad.
Oh, eat me and eat one.
What's that about?
I