Name: Joe Rogan Experience #2098 - Matt McCusker & Shane Gillis
Uploaded: 2024-02-06T00:00:00.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #2098 - Matt McCusker & Shane Gillis' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-02-06. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #2098 - Matt McCusker & Shane Gillis' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-02-06. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #2098 - Matt McCusker & Shane Gillis

Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out.
The Joe Rogan Experience.
Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day.
Boys.
Yes.
Salute.
Hey.
Bud Light came all the way back.
Cheers.
Bud Light.
Chasing water.
They came all the way back.
Matt.
I can't.
I'm not drinking.
I can't.
Are you a non-drinker now?
No, I drink.
I just unfortunately have a bad tummy.
Can't have gluten.
Oh, yeah.
I've had it since I was like 21.
Is it a Crohn's thing?
No, it's like celiac.
If I have it, I won't die.
I'll just start burping every day.
Celiacs is rough, man.
I have a buddy who didn't know he had it until, I think he was like 25 or
something like that.
Yeah.
It's about when you got it, right?
21, yeah.
Well, he probably had it his whole life.
It just felt like shit.
Yeah, maybe I have it.
He might all have it.
That's terrible.
You might all have it.
You can put down 18 of these.
There's no way you can have it.
Responsibly.
Responsibly.
Responsibly.
There's no way you're not driving.
It's true.
For some reason, you can do it, though.
I don't understand.
I've never seen anybody consume beer the way you can.
I can drink beer.
But you just stay at a level, a communication level.
Well, there's no shots.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
Usually the guys, you start drinking like that, you're like, all right, what's
the next thing?
Right.
Shots.
That ends your night.
Yeah, there's a corner I turn.
Yeah.
Where I'm like, oh, no.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, yeah, I get to that corner.
Really concentrating on my liver.
Come on, boys.
Pump it out.
Turn that corner.
Bud Light came all the way back.
UFC, Shane Gillis.
Let's go.
Let's go.
Let's fucking go.
For the bros now.
I mean, that's a good move.
Like, that guy that we met, the CEO, he's got it together.
Yeah.
He gets it.
He gets it.
I thought you were the CEO now.
Just in commercials.
I knew you guys were going to fucking make fun of me.
I'm so happy.
It wouldn't have happened without this.
Listen, I'm so happy.
I'm so happy.
It just made so much sense.
You never let them go.
You never bailed on them.
In the heart of all the craziness, you never bailed.
Kid Rock's fucking shooting cases of it on his ranch.
That turncoat.
That's your nemesis.
That's your nemesis now.
I have to fight Bobby next time I go to Nashville.
You should have a duel.
A classic duel.
I think it was an important moment in culture where people realized, like, you
know, there's
consequences for certain things.
And some people, like a guy like Kid Rock, can shoot your brand.
You've got real problems with that demographic.
Who would have guessed?
Who would have fucking ever thought that was going to happen?
I mean, just seeing Kid Rock do that, people must have been like, oh, fuck.
You think they watched it in, like, a boardroom, like, guys, we've got to talk
about this.
I mean, that lady who was in charge, the one lady who made that one video.
Let's move on.
Hell yeah.
Yeah.
Hell yeah.
Wow, I didn't see that coming.
Thanks, fellas.
I think we've beaten that fucking horse into a pulp.
It's a meaty jelly on the ground now.
Yeah.
It's been awesome.
Yeah, it's awesome.
I'm so happy.
They're smart, man.
They did a smart thing.
And they did a smart thing with the UFC, too.
It's perfect.
Yeah.
It's perfect.
Yeah.
They should make the fighters drink a beer before every fight.
Yeah, I don't think that'd be too much of it.
You know how they have monster cans?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That probably won't happen, though, but why not?
Yeah.
Why can't you?
Why can't you have a...
All you have to do is put Bud Light on the bottle.
It's not like they're drinking fucking Monster during the fight.
That's what I was saying.
Yeah.
Are they going to say it's bad for you to have a Bud Light after a fight?
That's crazy.
He just got punched in the head 185 times.
After the fight, yeah.
Yeah.
I don't think that's a tough sell.
I think those guys are cracking beers after.
Yeah.
Yeah, like the Sean Strickland-Drickus-Duplessis fight.
Those guys are drinking after.
They deserve a lot of beer after that fight.
Use them as ice packs, too, like a cold.
Yeah, it's like...
A cold one.
All right, all right, all right.
It feels good.
It's on that.
You know what I've never had used on me is that end swell.
They take that piece of hard steel...
That's got to hurt like fuck, dude.
And they push all the swelling away from your eyes so you can see better.
Oh, man.
Where does it go?
They just push...
Push off to the side of your head.
Yeah.
It's just to clear your vision so you can go out there and get punched again.
Yeah, you ever see that?
That press?
No, I didn't know what that was.
That was like Tyson Buster Douglas.
They didn't have one.
They didn't bring it.
They thought Tyson was going to fuck up Buster Douglas that bad.
Well, he had a bad corner.
See, Tyson's downfall is largely related to many things.
Everybody falls.
They just get too big.
It's too unmanageable.
But also, Costamato died and then he left Kevin Rooney.
And so now he's with these guys that were just like around.
And they're his trainers.
And it's like he's Tyson so he can beat everybody, anybody.
Yeah.
Anyway, but then he gets to this one dude in Buster Douglas who's really
prepared.
His mom just died and he was always like that super talented guy.
Like, look how bad his eye was.
Jesus.
Look how bad his eye was.
And they didn't have an N-swe.
They had a glove.
They filled a rubber glove with ice.
So stupid.
Oh, shit.
I mean, you need to push on that and push it to the side.
And Tyson's still almost won.
He's still almost won.
He still dropped it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
There was a questionable 10 count on that.
It was a questionable 10 count.
That was questionable.
It was definitely, but there's a few of those out there in the sport.
The sport should operate on a time.
Like a digital timer should go off the moment someone touches the ground.
That's how it should go.
Because if you're a guy and, you know, maybe you like this guy more.
Yeah.
You know, like the fighters and the referees, they know each other.
Like, I'm, you know, I'm around these guys all the time in MMA.
And it's just, you get to be friends with them.
I'm friends with these guys.
Damn, so there's no official clock.
It's just the ref is in their head.
That's great.
Well, in MMA, obviously, this will count.
But in boxing, I'm sure it's kind of a similar situation where they all know
each other.
Like, hey, what's up?
What's going on?
How you doing?
Yeah.
Dude, I used to ref kids basketball when I was in high school.
And as soon as a kid talked shit to me, I'm like, in my head, I was like, your
team's
losing.
I'm going to do everything in my power.
As soon as they're like, are you serious?
If a parent spoke up, I'm like, you just lost this game for your son.
Yeah, like, way to go, dickhead.
And now just the whole time.
You're just high as fuck coaching kids basketball.
I'll get like 15 bucks a game.
Some parents are insufferable.
Dude, it's insane.
They're so insufferable.
You see it in combat sports, too.
You see it, like, some parents are just so crazy.
Yeah.
And they think, they almost want to hit the other kid that fought their kid.
Like, hey, this is the deal.
That makes sense, though.
It doesn't make sense.
No, no, I'm saying, like, you see your kid getting hit.
It's not like a sport, like a football or something.
Yeah.
There's like an instinct to be like, I got to go beat that kid's ass.
Oh, for sure.
But you, you know, everybody knows what's going on here.
This is like, it's very important you don't violate that, especially with kids
and adults.
And it's like, you're allowing another child to possibly knock your kid
unconscious.
And then that's the agreement you're making.
Jesus.
And you're trying to have your kid is trying to knock that kid unconscious.
Yeah.
Yeah, it is what it is.
It's intense, man.
When I used to coach kids, I used to take kids to fights, like young teenagers,
take them
to fights, you know?
And sometimes their parents would just be fucking freaking out, you know?
It's like, I'm so used to seeing people get kicked in the face.
To me, it's like normal.
I don't have any kids.
I'm 21.
Yeah.
And I'm like, okay, how do I talk to these parents and get them to relax and
understand,
like, this is the agreement that's been made here.
Yeah.
You can't freak out.
Yeah, you're going to freak your kid out.
Yeah, you're going to freak your kid out.
You're putting too much pressure on your kid.
Like, Helio Gracie used to give his children toys and presents if they lost.
That's kind of cool.
Yeah.
He wanted them to, he just wanted them to get better.
And he's like, the fear of competition, the fear of losing is so overwhelming.
He would do everything he could to mitigate it.
And so instead of him getting fucking angry and hyped up, he would hug them and
give them
toys and give them things if they lost.
That's really nice.
That's kind of a good way to go about it.
Because even, like, basketball and football, like, I've seen parents, like, spaz,
dude.
Yeah, because if you think about it, like, the kid's going to try to win anyway.
He's not going to try to get his ass kicked for a G.I. Joe.
You know, he's going to try to win anyway.
So if he wins, he gets the win.
And if he loses, he gets a fucking toy.
Yeah, exactly.
I had to bet once, my dad, if I scored three baskets in a game, I'd be able to
rent Mortal
Kombat.
My whole team was trying to get me, my friends were trying to get me the ball.
I sucked, dude.
Six points?
I, yeah, needed six points.
Jumping six in a summer league game is not easy.
No, it was young.
We were young, dude.
It was tough.
There was a wrestling match that was recently, this video went viral, because
this kid, these
two guys are wrestling, and it looks like this kid doesn't have an arm in.
It looks like he's just on the neck, which is illegal in wrestling.
He's supposed to have an arm in.
And the dad jumps in, and I think he hits the kid.
Oh, no.
Yeah, the dad, I believe, got banned for life.
Yeah, that should do it.
It's pretty crazy.
Oh, he actually jumped in and beat the dude's ass?
Yeah, he thought it was WWE rules.
It's like, I don't know.
He thought it could interfere.
He came out of the steel chair.
I don't know what the rules are to wrestling, so I can't tell you whether or
not this—I really
know very little about wrestling, so I don't know whether or not the kid was
doing something
that was highly illegal.
In jiu-jitsu, it looks normal.
It's like, oh, yeah, he's got his neck.
But I guess in wrestling, you can't just grab the neck.
Yeah.
You have to have an arm in.
I shouldn't even be talking about this.
I really should—I honestly should know.
No, you're right.
It's the things that I should know, you know, what the limitations of their
sport are.
But I just—I'm always like, it's so silly.
I guess we can choke in wrestling.
I think you could—maybe like a classic headlock.
I don't know.
Yeah, you could hit in the fucking—
But don't you have to have an arm in, though?
Don't you have to have an arm in?
I have no clue.
I don't know any rules about wrestling at all.
I don't either.
I don't understand.
I was also saying it's hard to drop—I was saying it's hard to drop six in a
summer league
game.
Oh, yeah.
I wasn't—I wasn't poo-pooing your effort.
I'm like—
No, Matt, I'm talking about—
If I dropped six in a summer league game, I was like—
Yeah.
Fell down ten times.
There's a choke where you put someone completely unconscious with one arm—with
the—just
the—like a headlock.
It's called like a bulldog choke or a schoolyard choke.
Yeah.
They call it a schoolyard choke.
That's how Carlos Newton beat Pat Miletic for the welterweight title.
Like way, way back in the day, it's a crazy picture because Carlos Newton is
fuckin' shredded.
Yeah.
And he's just got a hold—
Is that the one you have here?
No, no, no, that's—
That's Alexander Carell.
That's a scary one.
That's the scariest guy that's ever lived!
That's the scariest thing I've ever seen.
Yeah, he's the scariest guy that ever lived.
T