Name: Joe Rogan Experience #2436 - Whitney Cummings
Uploaded: 2026-01-10T18:00:59.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #2436 - Whitney Cummings' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2026-01-10. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Joe Rogan Experience #2436 - Whitney Cummings' from PowerfulJRE on Comedy Buff. Published 2026-01-10. Transcript available.

Joe Rogan Experience #2436 - Whitney Cummings

Joe Rogan podcast check it out. The Joe Rogan experience. Train by day Joe Rogan
podcast by
night all day. So that's just for dice to hold. Yeah he just holds on to him.
Oh and he he holds
on to him then he swaps him out for a new one. Was the unlit cigarette like the
original fidget
spinner? Well most people don't do it because most people when they have a
cigarette in their
hand they want to light it. But Dice has got the ability to just hold on to the
cigarette. Do you
remember when candy cigarettes were a toy for kids? Yeah I had those. Oh yeah
they were priming you.
Totally and they would poof like sugar would come out. No I don't remember that.
Oh yeah you go
and like powdered sugar would come out. Really? Yeah. Am I right Jamie? Am I
making that up? I remember
them just being like a candy that you suck on. Or was that just the cocaine my
parents put on it. It was
just a candy stick. Nasty chalk stick. Maybe there was maybe there was a
different one. Maybe there's
more than one kind of candy cigarette. Couldn't you there was like gummy cigars
I remember and then
the candy cigarettes. That must have been them just trying to get you addicted
to just like the
motion of it or like participate with your parents or something. Yeah it was
just a way to sell candy
but probably also engineered by the tobacco companies. That was back when they
were lying
about cigarettes being addictive too and causing cancer. Well they used to
prescribe it to pregnant
women right? They used to prescribe it for kids with asthma. Yeah. You need to
strengthen
those lungs up fella. And this is my favorite thing. Did they know? They
already knew. Yeah
they already knew. They already know. Everybody had to know. You smoke
cigarettes for a while
you start coughing up black shit you feel terrible. According to the internet
this this pack did
have some sort of would blow smoke according to this person on Facebook. Whoa.
Which is
like sugar. I didn't remember a play lighter or a lighter battery so. A battery?
I don't know
what that is. Smoke that was stuck on this battery. What the fuck? As kids we
would suck on actual
batteries. We didn't need one to go. Oh yeah. Remember when you lick them? Dude
we would just
lick it just to get a jolt in your tongue. It is wild how like like yes the
phones are obviously very bad
for kids but when you think about the stuff we did as kids I was just like I
would just hang out with
a light socket for like two hours. That's all I needed. A paperclip, light
socket, like
light socket? Or like a yeah the electric socket? Electric socket. You would go
into an electric
socket with a paperclip? Did no one else do this? That's really bad. Did you
inhale glue or no? Oh I
sniffed it. Rubber cement? Yeah. Okay. Oh I used to love making models. I used
to make like Godzilla
models. You know those. Oh with glue? Remember those models? Yeah you had
rubber cement glue. Remember those? Yeah yeah you would. I mean
Elmer's too. Yeah. You could peel it off your skin. We just put it on our skin
and just peel it off. Oh yeah. Just like a leprosy
fetish or something. Yeah. But the uh the rubber cement glue was a big one
though. A lot of people sniff glue.
We used to have a glue gun. My mom had a glue gun. For what? It's like a hot
glue gun.
Crafts. Arts. Crafts. Okay. Kill men. I don't know. When you when you look back
at shit your parents did.
You're like what was that? What were you interested in? Why did she have
powdered gold and put it in
coffee of the men she was dating? What was that? But like a glue gun. Like
there's just so much dangerous
shit growing up. When I think about my like injuries as a kid. I'm like yeah I
got burned on the glue gun.
Everyone's like huh? Yeah they weren't looking out for kids back then. Like
when did they start like
worrying about dangerous toys? I mean after like the 50th lawn dart you know aorta
puncture. Oh I remember
the lawn darts. Those are crazy. You're just throwing like. It's a fucking
weapon and they were heavy.
If they hit you in the head you would die. Dude it's just like tetanus. Right
in the heart. Like let's let's look
this up. How many people do you think have died from lawn darts? By the way way
more than is reported
for sure. Right right right. I'm just putting this here so I don't know. It has
to be dozens. And seesaws.
Uh yes. You remember seesaws? No seat belt. No just just plywood. Right. With
handles. With a handle.
But we would also it's such a testament to our nature because we would make it
even more dangerous.
Like remember like you'd be on the seesaw like if you were up I would you'd
like jump off it. Oh yeah yeah.
To watch the kid. Just to watch the kid fucking plummet to the earth. So sadistic.
Just careen to the ground. Okay what is uh our sponsor perplexity said uh
pointed metal lawn darts
were officially linked to three child deaths in the united states before they
were banned. Just three?
Definitely more than that. Officially linked. From 78 to 86 approximately 6100
to 6700 people
were treated in U.S. emergency rooms for lawn dart injuries. Most of them
children. Found lawn dart
injuries led to a four percent case fatality rate in its patient sample with
many severe head and eye
injuries with help which helped justify the eventual ban. So only a couple a
couple but mostly children.
I would like to know the story of the adults. But I mean people hit people with
shovels. All the time.
Yeah. I guess it's because lawn darts are a toy that they had a bandit. Yeah
there was a lot of that.
Remember um what are the pogo sticks? Mm-hmm. I mean those were so dangerous
when you think about
they were just like they were just like always. They still have those though. Hogo
sticks? Those were hard to do.
Also looked up the most dangerous toys for kids. Trampolines. Remember the ones
with the metal coils?
Oh did you ever see the atomic energy lab in the 1950s? Yes. Yeah it actually
had legitimate radioactive material.
I love it they were like you know what guys child labor this is inhumane this
is wrong come
go play with some toys. Here's a radioactive uranium bomb. Well didn't Michio Kaku
make a
some sort of a reactor in his basement or his backyard or something like that
when he was a child?
When he was in high school I think. Sick. Yeah. Legend.
Well he's like a legitimate scientist but I mean when he was a child he made a
fucking nuclear reactor in his
backyard. I went to get um NyQuil or Sudafed the other day and they made me
show my id. Oh yeah because
you can make meth with it. Right right right. Sick. Meanwhile you can get a
prescription for Adderall.
We just say you have ADHD. I don't even think you have to do that. You just
have to be like I'm bored.
Right. I'm neurodivergent. Yeah. Right. I mean it's all self-diagnosed. You can't
concentrate.
Are we gonna look back the way that we look at like you know the Nazis and go
like they were on
meth. Are we gonna look back in like 20 years and be like everyone was on meth.
Yeah everyone's on Adderall.
That's for damn sure. I mean the amount of journalists that are on Adderall is
off the charts.
A friend of mine was telling me like all of his colleagues take Adderall. To
help them work.
Yeah. Because they have so many projects that they're doing that require
intense
fucking research and they're googling saying chat GPT please write my article
for me. Did you see I
think it was the new york times or someone left in uh Jamie do you remember the
prompt that ends
the you know what it spits out on chat GPT oh to prove that they had just copy
and pasted it
like wild yeah well there's a lot of that there's a lot of shitty people in
every walk of life there's
bad doctors bad plumbers bad journalists but a lot of them are on Adderall a
lot of them are on speed
It's just that there's so much adrenaline out there to get there's so many like
natural ways i feel
like to get that you know yeah but i don't think it covers you i think if you
really want to like
sit in front of that for a fucking computer and bang out words it seems like Adderall's
the way to go
but if you really do have ADD or whatever this is like i'm the first to say
like what are all these
diagnoses um but because i was prescribed five milligrams slow release Adderall
to sleep to sleep
if you actually have it it calms you down it doesn't amp you up what is it what
is it ADHD
the inability to focus or is that real a busy brain dude i look i just i think
a lot of our superpowers
are being dulled a lot of people with superpowers are being dulled by pharma
and we're being pathologized
for actually kind of extreme strengths you know in a lot of ways so there's a
lot of like legitimate
people that are arguing that about adhd okay good i'm not like a no like
legitimate psychologists
neuroscientists that it's what it is is you can't concentrate on things you're
not interested in
but you can concentrate on things you're interested in like heavily like if
people that are that
supposedly have adhd they can play video games for 10 hours a day that's
exactly right well how come
because it's exciting oh they can't sit in a classroom and watch some pedophile
lecture them
on fake history while they're getting hemorrhoids and some like chair with like
shitty lighting above
them i mean it's like yeah of course kids are bored of course they can't sit
still you know well it was
i was reading about how finland they don't um uh teach their kids to read until
they're like seven
because uh it's better to have them develop their ability to focus first on the
things they want to
do so by the time they do learn to read they actually you know can focus sounds
like a terrible idea you're
gonna be so far behind my kids well yeah i mean look kids in america learn how
to read when they're
little babies if at all uh if at all like i mean yeah that's the other thing
when it's like don't
teach kids to read it's like by that time is nerling just gonna learn to read
for them who knows it's
interesting like having a kid now i'm like what do i what world do i prepare
them for do i even teach
the mandarin or is that just gonna be like remember when you two just put a
song on our phone
it was so weird well that was apple's idea and you know i talked to bono about
that who's
you know it was devastating for them because all of a sudden everyone hated you
too they used to love
you too yeah they had so many hits they're so good and then all of a sudden
folk you why are you on my
phone is that interesting the human nature of i love something unless you force
it on me yeah
well it's just people are always looking for a reason to complain and if you
have this song on your phone
right away like hey these guys but also i want to hunt let me find it let me
feel like i discovered
something well i think they just thought it would be a great way to promote
this new album
and they just really didn't understand human nature it's also yeah it used to
be like if you saw five
billboards for something you're like i gotta see that movie now you see like
five ads for it and you're
like why are you trying so hard like if it's good i'll hear about it yeah i try
to tell that to my friends
like do not get overexposed like there's a re i mean i don't just say no to
everything
because i'm not interested in doing anything more yeah but it's also because i'm
clearly overexposed
and you got to know when you're overexposed but i have friends that like they'll
do every
fucking interview that anybody asks they'll do every project that comes up yeah
they never have any time
like i gotta slow down like yeah you gotta slow down like why are you doing all
this you're already
wealthy yeah why are you doing this be a little mysterious live a life live a
life on top of what
you're doing live an actual life don't wait until you're 60 and go what did i
do right even if it's
for if you need to justify it through workaholic purposes like it took me so
long to get out of my
workaholism the first time i had to do 